Regrets

I miss my dreams,
Why can't I cry?
Why does this feeling of everlasting pain haunt me?
Why can't I stop regretting?
My life is full of regrets, even when its not my fault....
Why can't I stop regretting and live a good life?
For the fullest of myself?
Why can't I dream anymore?
There's nothing wrong with dreaming.
It does not distort reality.
Dream is a place where I am really myself...
Without doing anything to myself.
Layers of painful thoughts,
Just thoughts,
Nothing more,
Nothing happened.
Yea nothing happened,
But I regret it all,
Why was I born this way?
Why am I living my life this way?
Why do I have so many faces?
...Why do I lie about my self?
Yes, I could cry now...
These tears keeping me warm,
Getting a little more numb.
I will cry again,
One day,
But this pain will grow even more,
Before I cry again.
I'm nothing like what I'm supposed to be,
I don't act or think as the color of my skin.
I don't fit in,
And I'm also not the people I enjoy being around with,
So where do I fit in?
I'm not him,
Neither am I me...
Who am I?
The dilemma of staying in this torture is far more painful,
...than being suicidal.