Silence Never Ending

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89 words
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Author’s note: This is my first attempt at a Terzanelle. I would appreciate any feedback please. Constructive criticism is always welcome.

Silence never ending
Alone within these walls
Silence never ending
A single teardrop falls
Heartbreak’s sweet surrender
Alone within these walls
Passions burning embers
Become a memory
Heartbreak’s sweet surrender
Adrift upon the sea
Waves of joyful laughter
Become a memory
Pain forever after
Follows the funeral march
Waves of joyful laughter
Fair breaks a weary heart
Silence never ending
Follows the funeral march
Silence never ending

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5 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 18 years ago
Very Nice

For a first attempt, you captured the movement very nicely, not perfect, but well done. Keep it up!

RhymeFairyRhymeFairyalmost 18 years ago
I am no expert but ...

I loved this poem !!

You grabbed us from the first line. Showered us with beautiful, and heartfelt imagery. Then let us fly free within the silence ~ Great poem !!

hugo_samhugo_samalmost 18 years ago
~

Evocative, thoughtful poem. I know little of poetry styles or types but the poem itself was laden with feeling. Thank you

Hugo

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 18 years ago
I'm

not an expert on this particular form but your poem grabbed my attention. The repeating line of 'Silence never ending' and the quickly contrasting imagery made this stick in my head.

p.s your poem has been mentioned in today's new poem reviews