- Non-Erotic Poetry
- Silence of the early morning
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Silence
the light crunch of gravel under foot
mourning dove's coo
palm fronds creaking on the breeze
the quiet tapping on the door
creaking as it opens
soft voices raised and fingers scraping
guitar strings as the song rises from the radio
gentle footfalls on the stairs
fabric sliding down limbs
rustling of the sheets
groans of the bedsprings
the whisper of your lips across my ear
the irregular breaths of anticipation
- COMMENTS
UnderYourSpellalmost 13 years agoI do feel it needs something to gather it all together at the moment what you have here is a list before you start writing the actual poem
simply__mealmost 13 years agoI like. The word crunching to start is a good contrast to the opening.
twelveoonealmost 13 years agoand apologizes, regarding palms. Relooking, you do have two creakings here, same scenario, another think to think about.
twelveoonealmost 13 years agothe light crunch of gravel under foot
mourning dove's coo
palm fronds creaking on the breeze
Not bad opener
Creak? question the the sound, question you will have three unstressed syllables in a row. Ok, further a question for you? On your own, rate your lines, three best to you. The worst? A5 (new writer) keep it up.
