Source of Income

Source of Income

The binders of rejection letters are brown-speckled
From cat vomit
From when my cat got sick 10 years ago

I have an advanced degree or so they say
But I'm a bad risk
I have kind of "different way" about me
and kind of a sidelong stare
and odd mannerisms
Nobody wants my labor
But they do want my time and my livelong day soul- killing
As long as they don't have to pay for it.

In my line of work
That means supplementary questionnaires
and five-page long essays
that leave me just feeling stupid and blind
They all have to be specifically geared to the position
They need the right fit

I've got about 20 more years on this earth tops
One day I'll have my treatment I need denied
By the big insurance shots
And this world will kill me off
Like a bad infestation.
I couldn't pump much money into the economy anyway
How could I
No sources of income

I'm tired
Give me a job sorting mail in the meantime
Keeps food on the plate and buys the roach traps
The advanced degree
For which Sally May is soaking me once a month
Buys me the right to kill my weekends
On 20 page Sisyphuan work histories and supporting documents

Just give me a job
Sorting mail or something
And let me just
Keep writing
Going to BDSM clubs
Smoking out
And living my weird life
Until I die
My soul can't shrivel up more than it already has