suicide?

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go your own way little seed
and take a spark of hope

extinguish memory in a flash
of bright light

Smoke at the end of a barrel
Off the blade of a knife
Seen behind bulging eyes

as your fingers tear at the rope
as you press towels to your wrists
as your fingers push the buttons

summon them in drops of red
splashes of red
flickers of red
call for help now

don't you see that
a life not loved
is a love not lived?

  • COMMENTS
5 Comments
Fish_TalesFish_Talesover 12 years ago
Felt it

Dear C1982 - I know this is old, but I'm randomly looking at poems to get a feel for this site (anyway, Shakespeare is old, Shelley is old, Wordsworth....you get the drift). I liked this one. Maybe (unfortunately) because I can relate to the scenarios and the feelings. "extinguish memory in a flash of bright light" followed by "smoke at the end of a barrel" sounds cliched in isolation, but it's not - you know it's not when you're pissed you didn't think of it yourself. Good work. I hope it was only a fictional construction though...If I were able to, I would think it deserves at least a 4.5 (maybe 5) if only for the fact that the issue is examined in a compelling, yet ultimately optimistic way. I am amazed there are not more comments.... shame

fawniefawniealmost 20 years ago
powerful words for a harsh subject!

i've written too about suicide..it's never easy..simple and complex..you hit triggers with this though.

its too bad those who choose this out can't see the red of tears that flow when they're gone.

anyhow, i thought this was beautifully written! fawnie

Maria2394Maria2394almost 20 years ago
i see too much

in this poem, its strong and disturbing, excellent forceful poem. I especially like this part-

summon them in drops of red

splashes of red

flickers of red

red, red red...strong indeed

tarablackwood22tarablackwood22almost 20 years ago
I agree...

...that this is powerful indeed! The language is magnificent, written in terse bursts to fit the theme and intensity of the message. Just wonderful!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 20 years ago
Powerful.............

.......message! Well done,Carrie.

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