sunroof naughty

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48 words
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2rivers
2rivers
1 Followers

She is fast on the errand
so fast
round corners, sun, stars
milky way beating
upon our laps

black steel and tight pants
slight blue this moon
a glow
whipped centrifugals
our lean

unfasten before parking
drive till you
can not bare my left hand
causing
your-down-shift

2rivers
2rivers
1 Followers
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  • COMMENTS
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5 Comments
AnonymousAnonymousalmost 20 years ago
thi s is my favorite

Im really gonna miss you, you flirt,:)

AnonymousAnonymousabout 20 years ago
I could

smack that hand, left away wild

unnerving at curves

freedom found in tachy ways

revolves around us,

mends us

break us, breaks down

your hand on my leg, shift

slowly into low

rumble grin and keep me

to yourself

AnonymousAnonymousover 20 years ago
I give......

...this racy, erotic ride an unqualified 5. Wild, loved it.

perksperksover 20 years ago
centrifugals, our lean

You know I loved this poem, but the part in between centrifugals and our lean, needs a comma, or else centrifugals sounds like it comes right after... whatever I got lost there, but then when I read it again and again, I saw what you meant and rounded that sharp corner with you. This is a smooth poem that moves like it's on rails<to quote the movie pretty woman>.

nice job.

EumenidesEumenidesover 20 years ago
Very nice!

I loved the sound of this poem. I can envision most of it, but the sound clinches likability for me. The "our lean" part was confusing at first. Another litster had to explain it to me, but then I got it. Perhaps there should have been a comma before it. Other than that, I loved it.

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