- Non-Erotic Poetry
- The Introvert
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Click hereSo quiet
At times,
The only way
To be heard
Is through observation.
Then
The pen
Comes into play and
Becomes the trademark
That
Left
An
Extrovert
Mainstream
Only
Understands.
- COMMENTS
dcpoet44almost 20 years agoAuthorthanx for all the comments on this one from all of you. very much appreciated. all of you are in agreement that it definitely is best to stop after trademark of which i will do. i'm thinking the best way to handle the last part i introduced would be to call the next poem *the extrovert*. i'd say i was attempting to contrast the two in society. sometimes with coming up with a good idea on the spur of the moment i need to pause and let it soak in.
perksalmost 20 years agoI was expecting an acrostic with your use of capitals. I don't know how many times I tried to read the word that was written there, and then realized that it wasn't. :D
That being said, I love the first part. After "becomes a trademark" I'm lost. The clarity is missing without punctuation, with use of capitalized single word lines. I don't know what I'm reading, or where I'm supposed to breath, so the poem feels like it just doesn't end but drifts away and you don't even realize it's over, but suddenly it is. "the only way to be heard is through observation" I might have to quote that line. It's a really wise insight.
perksalmost 20 years agoI was expecting and acrostic with your use of capitals. I don't know how many times I tried to read the word that was written there, and then realized that it wasn't. :D
That being said, I love the first part. After "becomes a trademark" I'm lost. The clarity is missing without punctuation, with use of capitalized single word lines. I don't know what I'm reading, or where I'm supposed to breath, so the poem feels like it just doesn't end but drifts away and you don't even realize it's over, but suddenly it is. "the only way to be heard is through observation" I might have to quote that line. It's a really wise insight.
twelveoonealmost 20 years agoas to why you are using capital letters here? it would look better in small case.
and what are the last seven words for?
first five lines- good poem - but said before
next four - adds to a good poem, changes the fact that the first five are familiar, rescues it.
RE: Last seven words, a possible suggestion, clarify what you want to say here, and arrange it so it doesn't look choppy.
