The Me that I Used to Be

I'm not me anymore...lost in this feeling, this thing,
it's opening new doors.
Maybe for better, no for worse.

Trapped inside this pit,
listen to all those people cursing this you.
Can't stick cotton in your ears and pretend you didn't hear it.
C'mon you know its true, this isn't you.

What happened? What's wrong?
Even with that face on, you can't fool nobody.
That smile can't change it, you're faking it.
But at least now you're not fake anymore.

They'd have to peel back the pieces to get to the core of me.
Cause when you were with me I felt free.
Now that you've left, my whole body's sore, my heart left torn in two.

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Mood crash, my head go bang, make it bash against the wall.
Trust me, I've been through it all.

Making my head throb, rhythm, nothing can stop it.
Pulsates through my veins, dripping blood, dripping tears.
Please tell me that my saviors here.

Comfort in making pain, comfort in the cuts.
Can you see my scars? I'm red bruised broken.
Torn in two, cause I realized I can never have you.

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I'm hurt on the inside, and on the out
I'd rather die than have them see that they've made me cry.
Can't control this salt water flowin from my eyes,
it stings, making her even more blurry eyed.

Trying to take a bigger leap up a flight of redemption.
Fall flat on my face,
that step can't be any more painful than this.

Peel my flesh from my bones, no drugs can heal this hurt.
Chewed down to the skin, bones cracked to the core.
Can't work this out like a cramp, all these tears making your shirt so damn damp.
Pain that's deep enough to make that weak girl weep.

-------

I can't call in sick for a heart break,
There's no prescription for a heartache.
I just want to crawl back into my bed,
Fall asleep to try and shove you out of my head.

What's the point of this?
If there's no easy fix, might as well just throw it all away.
Did that year mean nothing to you?

All that we've been through.
You stitched me up from scratch,
then ripped out the seams.
I guess we weren't the perfect match,
after all.

Creation, I've got no motivation.
Deviation, from what is real.
Holding back my tears as I sit here.
Lips tremble, legs shake.
There's nothing you can do,
to make it any better.

I finally get back on my own two feet...
Then you yank the stability out from under me.

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Even though I may be afraid to ask, I wish you'd baby me.
I wish I was your baby, for you to treat me like I'm your world.
Your girl, your sweet little princess,
that you rescued from herself.

In a far away land, now my life is a fairy tale.
Woke up to realize it was all a dream,
'cause I'm still waiting for somebody to come save me.

One before used me, threw me away. Left me all alone to deal with this shame and handle all the pain.

I wanted you to hold me, as I sit here rocking back and forth.
To kiss my tears away, you can't dissolve this pain.

Oh, how it stings, the betrayal.
So why am I letting myself care?
Just to get hurt again and again.

The ache inside my chest, whole body throbbing.
Screamin out in pain, you cut me,
you killed the me that I used to be.