The Moment my brother died

Time tripped over its loose laces.
Instead of it coming down to graze its knee, you did.
Does the world sometimes sound silent when you sing?
In dreams I stepped into a loud languished lament.
Blue Beset me as I gazed at the rope wringing round the rafters.
So sadly seeming as an airborne angel
With that tune in our ears
And your feet off the ground.
Gracefully free and aimed to ascend but inside you knew.
There would not come for you.
That creek crying down your cheek etched your true path.
A trickle from the womb gazing ever upwards but leaking into hell.
Yet this was the dream of what never came.
That is what was seen but not of what became.
A hand had held you around your heart.
Skin sundered skin, through bone, flesh and god.
Till ten tensing fingers clasped your heart.
Forced it to beat again, while drums came louder still
There was not just one rope tying you to the roof.
But hundreds
Pulling you up, down, and all apart.
But backed by bone pressed and with a flaming force
Tore an angel down from death and loosened the chains that bound you.
The hands were mine mauling mixed with merriment
That I had been with you and they were my hands
That took on the likes of law, love, and loss.
To keep that which I could no matter what cost.