- Erotic Poetry
- The rain
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lets take a walk on the beach
just being side by side
ecstasy within reach
watch the sun fall beneath the ocean
bodies pressed tight against one another
gentle caresses leading to that blissful motion
bodies entwined, sand everywhere
hands on random body parts
take control, pulling your hair
begging for more
squeezing your supple chest
a little pain for you, ecstasy galore
the softness of the breeze
cooling the heat
of a body on her knees
looking like a fallen angel from behind
desire taking hold
thrusting hard and furious, no interest in being kind
how you beg for more from me
simply fuels the fire
hands holding your hips, slapping your ass intensely
waves crashing in the distance
increasing the rythym of our passion
harder, faster, more .... explosion of pleasure in an instance
shaking hard and tightness gripping
holding on like never before
side by side gasping for air sweat dripping
pleasure from pain
clouds come
and
we
feel
the rain
- COMMENTS
PrincessErinabout 13 years agoAnother sexy poem although this one was a little wordy. Not sure how to describe it but not as flowing as your other poem.
vrosej10about 13 years agoThe first five stanzas of this poem are wonderful as are the last lines mentioned by Chip. I think maybe if you lose what is in the middle you could have something that is incredible. You really can write very well, all you need to do is edit more and try to recognise what it is that is unique in a piece of work, then focus on that.
UnderYourSpellabout 13 years agoI think you could tighten this up with some editing maybe bring the meter more in line
thanks for the read
buttersabout 13 years agobeing more a personal write, with a tendency to exclude the casual reader. i couldn't get engaged with it much, though it did exude a sense of fondness for the object of the narrator's passion. if this was written for a certain someone, i'm sure they'll be most pleased you wrote it for them.
having said that, these last lines .. now these became something of interest to me as an outsider - what you do here is allow the reader to engage with the poem:
pleasure from pain
clouds come
and
we
feel
the rain
