the scrivner's tale

No sooner had I written in
one of my many obituaries
I found fresh pressed faces
leaft in my face book
amidst among them of all things
was my high school lover
making me physically flinch
as if hit by something unseen
so certainly unexpected
well I guess it had to happen some time
yeah sure so why not now

Beyond belief that
what with all this internet
stills some sort of a connection
between the her and I
After all the many miles
Walked half tracks
we both have covered
To make ourselves so sure
we would never cross again
And yet there she was
in an over the shoulder wink

Of course I recall all of her
in all her everything I desired then
her breasts large aloft held high
proud in a thin tight tee shirt
then she'd let me in all my daring
but always only with her eyes
or twisted turns of words
she'd dare me to look
but never to touch her
I began to wonder
would anyone ever would

And then for a week or so
we kiss dared daringly
disturbingly deeply in public,
she'd bite my lip not letting go
Once I tried to cross the line
caressing a tiny patch of her wildness
her breathing halted as if struck
I felt awful blaming my lusty discovery
for taking something from her
like an uncaring conquistador
All only within my loving caress

She wouldn't talk to me after that
even to apologize for wanting her
Not that it matters now anyhow
I went on and she went on
her future ex lovers sought me out
to tell me of her many exploits
walking me through her panties
as if they had gotten one over on me
I just laughed and turned away
irony as always my only armor
hardened heart forged by outrageous fortune

Someone said that this was her hating me
for all my selfishness while we were together
Ah I said so I see well lesson learned
she sure showed me huh?
how many men was I worth after all?
the sad ones she used and discarded
I've never thought of that before
how funny that I don't even care
yet I suppose in the end it was as if
we left our marks in each other
a graft of love bearing strange fruit from time to time