- Erotic Poetry
- Ther Beauty within Her Beauty
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Click hereIf I were a poet I would be
seeking a vision of loveliness
with thoughts of love
seeping into my mind
My pens are ready
Her soul is what I’m seeking
As my lonely heart murmurs
She came as my lover
With her quest lusty fulfillment
first one-then another
Her coat of wool too warm
next her soft lace blouse
with the smooth feel of satin
The perkiness of her breasts
her tender nipples hardening
as I softly flutter a brush over them
The vision of her beautiful soul is exposed
Our lust has been extinguished
I am the poet that unveiled
My vision of beauty within her beauty
- COMMENTS
Maria2394over 19 years agosubmission? If so, I gave you a 5, but set the therm at 75 and heres why.
I love the idea of your poem, but it needs some punctuation remedies and attention to smaller details. the words, "softly flutter", well, drop the *softly*, as flutter can really only be a soft thing, if you explain too much, put in extra words, it may diminish another readers focus as it did mine. ( but tis just my opinion...)
I hope you keep working on this one, and others, I am waiting to see what you come up with-- maria
