Tough

twice i've seen the coming;
the depths of my despair.
twice i've had the fortune;
escaped that twisted lair.

i wonder what it is;
don't think; i know i saw,
glaring, malicious glee
within that hellish maw.

i don't know what is owed,
to whom it should be sent.
it may be inner others;
their courage that is lent.

might not have it in me;
could be another jones;
can i find the will above,
my once and mighty stones.

i feel it coming back;
how close i just can't tell.
may retreat for a time,
if this poem does well.