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Click hereIt's 7:18 am. I am tired.
Your indifference to me is unwelcome, you see,
because it reminds me of my own.
I am haunted. Crippled.
The battle I am waging is life or death.
Love.
Friendship.
Hope.
Tomorrow.
You have no power here.
Can't help me. Won't save me.
I can't even save myself.
I don't want to. I don't know how.
Surrounded, protected, by everyone, everywhere.
I feel alone. Empty. Defeated.
I want to sob. Need to shout.
Get away from me. Get away from you.
I swallow my tears instead.
Swallow you instead.
Disappear instead.
Make my bed.
Wash my face.
Brush my teeth.
Move my body.
I wonder how high a surface I need to jump from.