When He Cheats

A very dark parody of Carrie Underwood's Before He Cheats

Right now we're slow dancing
Bodies rubbing together real nice and tight
Getting frisky
Right now I'm poking a hole in the condom
Got a devious little devil in my mind
Leading me astray tonight
Right now his old lady is probably sitting at home
Waiting by the telephone for her man to call
And she don't know

CHORUS

I'm digging my nails into his sweaty back
In the back seat of his pretty little suped up 4 wheel drive
Carving my name into his leather seats as we make love
Again and again
Feeling his Louisville slugger fill me up hotly
I pant thickly
Taping all the action so later she'll know
That when he cheats
It's with me
It's always with me

Right now she's probably calling up all their white trash friends
Frantic to find where he is and when he'll be home
Never again
If I have anything to say about it
Right now I'm getting him drunk
Ready this time to get lucky
I swear I'm gonna have that man's baby
Right now we've got that hotel waterbed dancing
And she don't know....yet.....

REPEAT CHORUS

I might've lied to get him here
But I know he'll forgive me later
When he's free from that old nag
Cause the next time she sees him
I'm gonna make sure she knows
When he cheats
It's with me
It's always with me

CHORUS

2007 Ramona Thompson