When I Lost Joel

When I Lost Joel
By
EndtheDream

There is no religion
In the world that does
Not kill.
There is no love in the
World worthy of its name.
There is no friendship in
The world that is not
Fragmented moments when
You are not alone.
Even when that is when
You are most alone.
There is no morning
Or evening
That is not trumped by
Betrayal.
There are no eyes to see
With.
Or ears to hear with.
Black and white would be
An improvement in the color
Scheme.
There is no one out to get
You.
Or care.
They only care about themselves.
There are the Humbert Humberts.
And there is the Bronco Man.
And whatever remains in-between
Or to the left or right.
There is no Autumn
Breeze blowing cold.
There is no hand I long to hold.
Smiles are lies.
Peace is war.
Sleep is our succor
That we find less and less to
Do our bidding.
What are you doing here reading
These word?
Did you think they would have
An accidental hope tucked inside
Them?
Or read it in humorous pity?
What a sad and stupid man.
Hung up on a boy from so long ago?
There were the years when I knew
Him and the years he did not know me.
But finally the secret he found.
Like a snake egg beginning to crack
Open.
Not a Roc egg.
Not even a Sinbad glory
Or scintilla of one.
Work is going well.
My cats are fine.
I cry for half an hour and miss
Joel
Like a rib from my side.
There were school days then.
And places to put your dreams.
Little smiles and big fancies
And farm country roads to walk.
And I lost Joel
And the galaxies are done.
And I lost Joel
And now a fog hugs the sun.
If I go any longer in my life
In this place,
I will sleep into my center
Brain
And I will pull out the electrodes
Quite simply
One by one.
And see if I can live without
Thought,
Save of him,
And see if I can breathe
More like it was then.
Come snow and winter winds.
Hush us away.
Just me and my Joel
On splendid and opulent
Thanksgiving Day.