Why I don't sleep

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Every night I lie awake,
After I've prayed the Lord my soul to take.
I dare not shut my eyes and rest,
My heart will weep, my dreams will test.
So there I lie awake in bed,
A hole within and I feel dead.
For if I find that I should fail,
The dreams of you they will avail.
I smell your hair and taste your lips,
I explore your skin with fingertips.
We steal away to a secret place,
I nibble your ear and your heart will race.
It does not last, a cruel joke to make,
It's but a dream and my heart does break.
So many nights I lie awake,
After I've prayed the Lord my soul to take.
At my worst I wish to die,
My life's a sham, a snowballed lie.
Every morning I scream it's false,
But I love you above all else.
Once you were here now you're not,
A scant few memories, it's all I've got.
I'm so tired, I dare not sleep,
For when I wake I will weep.
I miss your soul, I miss your smile,
I wish we could be together for just a little while.
Every time I dream of us,
Together we were, and always thus.

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