With Apologies to Dr. Seuss

I have read your nasty messages, they made me very wet,
All about those nekkid photographs I posted on the ‘net.

Yes, it really turned me on to read the wicked things you wrote;
Would you really try to locate a clitoris in my throat?

You have asked for information, I’ll provide it if I can,
I can tell by all your questions you’re a very naughty man!

I have done it in the water and I’ve done it in the park,
And I once sucked off a soldier in the movies in the dark.

I have even done two guys at once; I did it on a bet,
I would like to try a woman but I haven’t done it yet.

Once I had this hot professor but his course I couldn’t pass,
Without extra credit every time he did me in the ass.

I once gave a cop a blowjob in a moving police car
I have taken out my titties, yes, while dancing in a bar.

Though I’m generally submissive I am also into roles,
I would really like to have just once a cock in every hole.

I too have some simple questions you could answer on the phone:
Tell me what you’d like to do to me if we were all alone:

Would you make me pull my panties down and see what you could find?
Would you tie me to the bedpost and then take me from behind?

Would you make me shave my pussy? Would you make me stroke my clit?
Would you take me to a biker bar and make me shake my tits?

Would you take some close-up pictures with some jism on my face?
Would you make a hundred copies and then post them every place?

Would you do me in my kitty? Would you do me in my ass?
Would you hump me, pump me, do me, screw me, fuck me hard and fast?

Would you like to strip me naked, would you nibble off my thong?
Can I be the party favor, bringing all your friends along?

Would you put me on the internet while naked on my knees?
as some cumslut with a strap-on took and used me as she pleased?

Would you call me names like “gutter slut” and “skanky little whore”?
Would you try to find perversions that I haven’t tried before?

Would you pimp me out at college, would you rent me to the team,
Would you offer volume discounts if I promise not the scream?

Would you take me home to hubby then when you were done at last?
Would you give him proof by showing all the spank marks on my ass?

Would you show him countless photographs of me and all the men?
Would you pick me up next weekend, please, and do it all again?