A Beautiful Wish Ch. 06

George remembered all of her attempts to bring him out of his depression after the death of his father. The therapy sessions didn't help because he didn't want them too. The various psychologists and "spiritual healers" wanted him to accept his father's death as something that had to happen, something that made sense, something that would all go away if he let it. The drugs only made him stop feeling, and that hurt even more. And his step-father stopped showing an interest in him when it was clear that George would never accept him as even a poor substitute for his real father.

"Haley and Corina would freak out if they knew the George of old. Haley has a big mouth, but her little jabs are nothing next to George's nuggets of wisdom." He heard her sip her tea and balk, "Would you like some more tea, hon? Mine is cold." Jessica got up and fumbled with the kettle some more. "You know, it's really sad, I don't think George has ever told his sister's that he loves them."

"But, I can tell that he wants to say it. It is on the tip of his tongue. But then he gets this pained look on his face, like...like..."

"Like someone died."

"Yeah."

Jessica sat back down with fresh tea. "I've seen that too. I think, I'm not sure but I think, that he associates love with loss. If he admits that he loves someone, even for a second, they'll leave him. I'm his mother so I know he loves me, even if he never says it. I can only imagine what its like for you, to put yourself out there and not have it returned."

"He will say it when he is ready. I have only known him for a few days, but one thing that I know for certain is that he feels more deeply than either of us can imagine. All he lacks is the courage to show it."

Another pause . "I think you're right," said Jessica. She chuckled lightly. "I have to admit, I think I might have been wrong about you. When you walked in my first thought was of all those girls I grew up around, who got any guy they wanted just by turning off their brains and hiking up their skirts. But I should have more faith in George. He would never settle for a girl like that."

"Thank you Mrs. Everhart," the sincerity evident in her trembling voice. "Do you think, we could start over?"

"I think we should. I'm Jessica Everhart, George's mother. It's very nice to meet you."

"I am Dawn... Dawn Lovecraft, I am George's girlfriend. It is an honor to finally meet the woman who raised such a wonderful son."

That's my girl, he thought.

The topic strayed away from George after that, focusing on Dawn's fictional background. Believing they would be finished soon, he headed back up the stairs quietly to wait in his room. The last thing he heard before he closed his door was, "So, why don't you use contractions?"

"Um, I do not know, I just..."

George quietly closed the door to his room and paced back and forth as he waited for them to finish their chat. Dawn had passed the test of his mother's wrath with flying colors, though he wasn't surprised. He believed Dawn could do anything, and not just because of her powers. She had a way about her that disarmed everyone. You couldn't hate her, even if you wanted too. She wasn't shallow or petty, or self-centered or rude. Even in the face of outright hostility she never stopped being thoughtful and genuine.

He was more surprised by the way his mother had acted. Sure, the kitchen was post-apocalyptic, and maybe he should have thought twice about going through her closet. But to freak out at Dawn for just being there, his mother had always been much more rational than that. He had always thought that, for a mother, she was pretty cool. She kept her music tastes current, played video games; she even cussed in front of George without so much as an apology. So why had she lost it so completely when she found out that he had gone into her closet? Maybe there was something there that she didn't want him to find, something other than his father's clothing.

Bah! What am I thinking? This is my mom, not some Columbian drug trafficker he thought. She's probably upset that I got into Dad's old clothes. It probably reminded her of how much she misses him. But the idea that his mother was hiding things from him was intriguing, and alarming. He had always been too preoccupied by his own drama to worry much about her. She always seemed so poised and strong. But maybe there was more going on that he had been too self-absorbed to notice. Maybe she was also in pain. Lonely, just like he had been.

In any case, it was an odd thing for George to hear them talking about him that way. He always believed that his mother had his best interests at heart, but he could have never imagined the depth of her concern. Had he really been so callous as to disregard his mother's love? He realized that he had made the same mistake with his mother that he had with his father. He had taken her for granted. But this time it was worse. Not only had he assumed that she would always be there, he had downplayed her affection for him in an effort to shield himself from more pain. The only upside was that she was still alive. There was time to make things right.

He ruminated over the situation for an agonizing hour before plopping down on the bed. He hadn't been tired up to that point, but the new bed's heavenly comfort lulled him into a dreamy haze. He closed his eyes and imagined what it would be like to spend the night with Dawn in the cloud-like wonderland he had wished into being. He could almost see her lightly tanned skin glistening with sweat, hear her melodious voice crying out in ecstasy, smell the tea-like scent of her hair as it fell around him, feel her entire body shiver out of post-orgasmic euphoria. Just thinking about being close to her was enough to make him hard. He rubbed his member casually as he dreamed of Dawn lying next to him, kissing him like he needed to be kissed, loving him just because he was him, and nobody else. He was asleep before he even realized it, drifting off into a dream involving Dawn, a sandy beach, a hammock, the sunset, and gently lapping waves.

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The wind, the salty mist, the cold, they bit his face and eyes as he shot at breakneck speed across the water. Exhilaration... invincibility... freedom. They were all that mattered. Speed, more speed. The waves couldn't stop him. Hit them harder, go faster, don't stop.

Too fast... too hard... the sea always wins.

A wave... too large. No control. A dull thud, a loud crack. Where is he? Where is dad?

There... face down. The sky is gray, the sea is gray. So why is the water red?

Save him. You can do it. Grab his hand, pull him up. Swim, goddammit, swim.

Too heavy... too rough... too cold. Can't do it. Going under, water everywhere, can't breath.

Get to the boat. Almost there. Just a little farther.

Arms, legs, cramping. Lungs heaving, choking. Let go... he's dead... you can't help him.

Never give up... never stop... invincible... free...

You'll die... let go... you tried... it's over...

Hand slipping.

Wake up... help me... I need you...

Too heavy... too cold... need air... I'm sorry...

Fingers slide free... he's gone... into the black.

Get to the surface... and breathe... but not live.

George broke the water's surface, sat up straight, and choked violently on air. He was awake, back in his room, his old room.

No. Was it a dream? Where is Dawn? It couldn't have been a dream. Please tell me it wasn't a dream!

His mother opened the door just a crack, and whispered, "George? Are you awake? You can come back down now."

George was soggy and cold. "Wei-what?" he asked shaking.

"I said, you can come back now. Dawn and I are finished. Are you OK? You're sweating."

Dawn wasn't a dream, he had awoken from a nightmare. George fell back as relief once again washed over him. "I...I'm OK. I'll be right down."

Jessica opened the door all the way and entered. She sat on the edge of the bed. "Honey, did you have the dream again?"

He didn't answer. But his mother knew. "You haven't had that dream for long time."

He was embarrassed. He was a grown man, and was fiercely loved by the most amazing creature in all the universe, yet he just had an old nightmare. "I get it every once in a while, when dad comes up in conversation. It sneaks up on me. I was feeling alright when I dozed off but, for some reason..."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He sat up straight, "Not really. There isn't much to say. Same old stupid dream, I woke up just as I broke the surface just like last time."

Jessica looked like she wanted to say so many things, but they had all been said. "You know that... I don't blame you? Right?"

George said nothing. He knew she didn't. She never had. But sometimes he wished she would. He wanted her to hate him for letting go, for being stupid, for being weak. For so long he had felt like it was no more than he deserved. She was the one person in the world who had every right to give up on him. But she didn't. While others feared him, loathed him, and took pleasure from his pain, she remained loyal, true, and hopeful. It would have been so much easier to give in to grief long ago, but she wouldn't let him.

After a long silence in which it was clear George was finished talking about the subject, Jessica cleared her throat. "Anyway, I got the chance to get to know Dawn a bit while you were sleeping. She's a lovely girl. I'm glad you were so picky and waited for a girl like her."

"It wasn't a matter of being picky. Girls just don't like me."

Jessica put her hand up to stop him, "I don't want to hear it. It's obvious now that that's a cop-out. Dawn's living proof. If you would have only shown some initiative and actually asked a few of them out, you wouldn't have been such a downer all these years."

"Wow, mom, thanks."

She brought her finger to her head like she was playing the dumb blond, "Oh, did I say that out loud?"

He pushed her playfully, almost shoving her off of his bed.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry! Sheesh!" she cried as she batted away his attempts at de-bedding her. "But really, you know what I mean. There's no law that says you have to be alone all the time, George. I don't care what you believe in that regard. You deserve to be happy. I just wish I could have taught you that sooner."

"Actually, we went and saw Lindsey today. It turns out that she's had a crush on me for years without me realizing it."

She gasped, "My Lindsey!? She told you!?"

"Well, no, Dawn kinda pointed it out to me. Apparently, it was extremely obvious."

"Oh, of course not," she said, her voice dripping with sarcasm, "you'd have to be Dr. Phil to poke through that cloak of deception."

"Wait. you knew?"

"Of course I knew! She made me swear not to tell you a long time ago."

"W-why didn't anyone let me know!? Why did she tell you and not me?"

Jessica turned somber, "George, cut her some slack. She's young, she is just as nervous about putting her feelings out there as you are. And she didn't exactly tell me, either. You have to understand, she has never had a mother, so she compensates by being one herself. But she only does it to people she really cares about: her father and you. That's how I knew. Do you remember the last time we went to the beach?"

"Vaguely," he said dryly. He remembered all too well. He had been tricked into going by his mom and Lindsey was there waiting for him. He spent most of the time trying to avoid having to go into the water for fear of taking his shirt off. While the rest of his family played in the surf, he and Lindsey sat on the beach. George was busy sulking and waiting for them to go home, but Lindsey was badgering him constantly about sunscreen and drinking water.

"Well, I could see what she was doing. She was so nervous about you seeing her in a bathing suit that she had reverted to caregiver mode. Afterwards I confronted her about it and she just blurted it out, made me swear not to tell."

George sighed heavily as he leaned back against the headboard.

"Are you mad?"

"No, I'm not mad. Actually, I'm a little mad at myself. Ever since Dawn came around I've been noticing all the parts of my life that I've been neglecting. There's Lindsey, you, Hayley and Corina, college, myself. So much of my life has been a waste. I have to be better. I can't keep going on like this."

Jessica patted his knee, "I'm glad all it took was a hot girl showing you the good things in life for you to finally wake up. And George, don't beat yourself up anymore. Can't we let the past go?"

George caught her meaning and turned towards the window to avoid her gaze. "I'm trying, mom," he said finally.

Jessica stood up and headed for the door. She stopped as she reached the knob, "Thanks for cleaning your room up by the way. Another one of Dawn's good influences on you, I gather?"

He looked around. Though it was his old room, it looked like the best possible version of that room. He was confused at first but then he remembered that Dawn had said she was going to make a few minor changes. He found himself missing this version of the room. Even though it was from a difficult time, the place had been his sanctuary, his escape from the pain and disappointment that was his daily existence. It was like growing out of a favorite pair of shorts. You can't wear them anymore but you hate to throw them away because of all the times you put them on knowing that they were the perfect fit. George was struck by how thoughtfully Dawn had treated it in her alterations, even if she didn't fully understand why it was important to him.

Just thinking about Dawn was enough to break him out of his funk. He felt alive again. "She threatened to put her clothes back on if I didn't. Its amazing how fast you can clean when a hot naked girl needs a place to lay down."

Jessica smiled as she playfully wretched, "Ugh, too much information! Make it stop!" George laughed and threw a pillow at her. "OK, I'm done. Come downstairs now. I need to talk to both of you."

As soon as she closed the door behind her the room reverted back into George and Dawn's love-nest. The difference was all-together shocking, and a bit empty without Dawn there with him. Maybe he had been too hasty in his wishes. The huge bed and the stripper pole were lot of fun but they weren't really him. Why should his room look like something out of a bad soft-core porn flick when that wasn't the person he really was? Dawn certainly didn't mind. Maybe he could get her to leave his old room intact (albeit the cleaner version he had now), and just pull out the "harem" room for special occasions.

He got up and went to the bathroom. After splashing some water in his face and rubbing his neck with a towel he was feeling much better. He took the opportunity to check his reflection in the mirror to make sure his new body had been maintained. For some reason, he had become worried that Dawn was just a dream again, but his reflection told him otherwise. Or at least, he was still in the dream. Either way was fine by him, as long as it didn't end.

He followed the voices of Dawn and his mom down the stairs and into the living room. They were sitting next to each other on the couch, pouring through old photo albums.

"Oh look!" cried Jessica. "This is my favorite."

Dawn's mouth fell open. "Is he..."

"Such a cute little tooshie. To this day I can't remember why he was wearing a shirt but no pants. Either I forgot to dress him properly, or he decided he didn't need them. I suspect it was the latter."

George knew which photo they were talking about. It was from when he was only two or three years old. He was watching his dad ride around on a quad behind their old house from behind a sliding glass door. He was naked from the waste down with his face pressed against the glass. His little behind dominated the photo.

As soon as Dawn caught sight of George she pulled the photo out and showed him as she laughed. "You were hot stuff even then!"

George laughed in embarrassment as he sat down next to his dream girl. Dawn and Jessica continued to ooh and ah at the various photos. Some were from George's various Cub scouting trips with his dad, some were from the vacations the young family had made together, a few from family outings with other relatives. The last photo in the album was of Henry and George side by side next to a large pool. George had just taken the gold in a regional swim meet, and Henry was hugging him tightly. His smile was huge and bright. It was so infectious that people had actually told him to stop, that it was making them smile too much.

When they were finished Jessica closed the album and stashed it away. Dawn pouted, "Aww, are their any more?"

"Unfortunately, no, not of George anyway," said Jessica as she shifted uncomfortably in her seat.

"Why not? He is so photogenic," whined Dawn.

"Well, uh, he just got camera shy after that."

"Mom, was their something you wanted to talk to us about?" said George in an attempt to come to her rescue. It was foolish to keep things from Dawn, she would find out eventually. But a part of George still wanted to spare her his drama. Everything was going so well between them. He hoped he could just forget the past entirely and focus on her.

"Yes, but I need more tea first." She got up and headed for the kitchen. "Would you two like some?"

"None for me, thanks," called George.

"I would love some more tea!" sang Dawn excitedly.

Jessica disappeared into the kitchen. When she was far enough out of ear shot Dawn pulled herself into George as tightly as she could. "Are you alright, Master?" she whispered.

George was again alarmed at the honorific. "Y-yeah. Why?"

"I sensed that you were in distress when you were in your room. I wanted to go to you, but I could not think of an adequate excuse. So I had to suggest to your mother that you join us again. Is there anything I can do?"

"I'm OK, Dawn, really. I just dozed off and had a bad dream."

"Really?" she pleaded.

"Well, I'm definitely feeling much better now," he said as he squeezed her.

Dawn looked even more concerned, "George, one of the reasons why I love you so much is that you are a terrible liar."

"Dawn, it was just a bad dream. You're acting like I was about to fall off a cliff."

"Master, I am your Genie. Would I not know the difference?"

Jessica reappeared with two mugs of steaming tea and placed one in front of Dawn, "There you go, sweetheart."

"Thanks, mom," Dawn said quite nonchalantly.

George couldn't believe what he had just heard. "Mom? She's calling you mom? How long was I gone?"

"Just a couple of hours. But we decided that since she has no mother, and since she is going to be staying here for a while, that I would do for now."

"So, you're not going to kick her out?"

"No. She may stay." George was about to jump for joy around the living room. "However," his jubilation halted, "there are conditions."

Uh-oh he thought. "What kind of conditions?"

"OK, rule number one: Dawn sleeps in the spare bedroom." George and Dawn visibly sank along with their hearts.

"Rule number two: she pays a monthly rent of two-hundred dollars."

"Wait, mom, she doesn't have a job. How is she supposed to pay rent?"

"That isn't my problem. And if I catch you paying her rent, I'm kicking you both out."

"Aww, mom,"

"Don't you 'aww mom' me. I think that's more than fair. Finding a place to stay for cheaper than that is almost impossible in this town, especially for use of an entire house."

George looked over at Dawn, who appeared to be a little uneasy. He was sure she was capable of holding down a job, but he remembered how nervous he was when he went looking for a job the first time. And he didn't need to worry about paying rent.