A Bend in the Road

"You splurged," Tad said, eating a little cheese and sipping wine.

"Well, I hadn't seen you in a few days. I wanted it to be special." I looked at him. "I want all our times to be special."

He smiled and put his hand on my shoulder. "Me, too."

The rest of the night went well. We ate well of the turkey, rice, and salad. After dinner, I pressed a small piece of cake and a cup of coffee on him. We talked about work, about politics, about sports. I poured another cup of coffee and we took it into the living room. I put on a long Beach Boys CD and turned down the lights. On the couch, we turned to each other. I played with his hair. "After what happened last week, I did a little soul-searching," I began.

"You did? And what did you find?" He looked into my eyes, then looked away.

"I found that I don't care what other people say or think. I don't care what my children or my ex-wife thinks. I just want to be with you. To tell you the truth, I can't believe that I'm saying it, but it's true: I just want you."

"Cliff, do you know that the hardest person I had to come out to was myself? All through my teenage years, I denied to myself who and what I really was. I figured that I hadn't met the right woman. When I met her, I would want her the way other men wanted women. But it never happened. Oh, I had plenty of opportunities, but it just wasn't right. Instead, I just thought about men. Finally, when I was twenty, I admitted to myself that I was gay. And it was like, 'Oh, what a relief!' I could finally relax."

"Well," I said, "I'm not exactly relaxed right now. In fact, I'm excited. I'm always excited around you. I don't think I've ever felt this way before, with any woman. As a matter of fact, Tad, I'm going to explode if I don't kiss you right now."

I leaned in and our arms went around each other. We kissed fiercely, passionately. I wished it would never end. "Tell me that you want me too, Tad."

"Oh I do, Cliff. I do!"

We left our coffee on the table and hurried to the bedroom.

Laughing, smiling, we undressed each other. I kicked off my shoes and took his off. I unbuttoned his shirt and kissed his chest. Off came the shirt. I reached for his belt and undid it. "Oh baby, what am I going to find when I pull your pants down?"

"Pull them down and find out," he whispered huskily.

I knelt in front of Tad, undid his pants, and pulled both his pants and underwear down at the same time. His cock jumped out. "Oh lord, it looks so good," I said, taking it in my hand. I licked the head and kissed the shaft, nuzzling it eagerly. "Get naked, Cliff," Tad said, and I quickly undressed. We fell on the bed together, kissing. Our tongues darted into each other's mouths. Tad kissed my neck, his hot lips tracing a lazy trail down to my nipple. I moaned in pleasure—it had seemed forever since we last made love. He moved down to my stomach, then lower, and I felt his breath on my cock. A warm, wet, appreciative tongue slid from the head of my cock to the root, then back up, where he engulfed me with his ardent mouth. A wave of feeling washed over me and I let out another groan. Tad worked his hand up and down the shaft, causing me to grunt. I took it as long as I could, then said, "Baby, if you keep doing that, I'm going to cum too soon. Let's change positions."

We shifted so that we were lying on our sides, each one facing the other's crotch. Now we could suck each other. After a little rearranging, we were set. I took Tad's sizable cock into my mouth, enjoying its smoothness and warmth, and sucked hard, trying to keep my teeth from grazing him too much. (After all, I was inexperienced.) At the same time, I was experiencing the most delicious sensations myself as Tad worked on me. We were both giving out with little cries of ecstasy. It was, for me, the most divine sexual experience I'd ever had. Tad knew exactly how to suck my cock. He alternated hard and soft, knew just when to let up and nibble on my shaft, then when to plunge back down and take to whole thing to its root. I was hard put to keep up with him. At times, I just wanted to lie back and enjoy what he was doing. But I wanted to give as good as I was getting, so I gamely kept sucking.

Tad took his mouth off and said, "Let's try something different."

"Anything," I said.

"Have you got any baby oil?" he asked.

"I believe so," I said. "Should I get it?"

"Get it and bring it to bed."

I got up and rummaged around in my bathroom cabinet. In the back was a bottle of baby oil that Margaret had kept. I brought it to bed.

"Have you ever heard of frottage?" Tad asked.

"No," I said.

"It's called cock-to-cock. We rub our cocks together. That way we get to lie on each other and look each other in the eyes. Here, I'll show you."

We sat up in the bed, facing each other. Tad poured a little oil into his hand, then took my cock into his hand and rubbed me down with it. He poured a little on his cock, too. Then, we scooched closer together so that our cocks were side-by-side, touching. "Now," he said, "take both cocks in your hand and start masturbating us together."

What a feeling! Unusual and sexy, at the same time. I loved looking at our two cocks next to each other, touching each other. It was like they were making love. Tad leaned in and we kissed. He placed his hand on top of mine and we stroked our cocks together. We fell to our sides, stretched out, and began making love again. "Get on top of me, lover. I want to feel you on top of me," Tad said. He opened his legs and soon our oil-slippery cocks were trapped between our bodies, rubbing against each other, and our bellies. I felt his hand grasp us both while I was moving against him. Our mouths were glued together. We were fucking face to face! "I'm not going to be able to keep this up for long," I managed in a strangled whisper, between kisses. "Me neither," Tad said. "Let's try to cum together, baby. I want to mix our sperm." I groaned with pleasure when he said that.

We went for it. Tad held us with just the right pressure. I could feel, with my cock, the shaft and head of his cock gliding against me. His eyes were closed, his mouth open. He was clearly deeply in the throes of pleasure, as was I. I never wanted that moment to end. I wanted always to be there, with my lover Tad. I felt the familiar tingling that told me I was about to climax. "Oh baby, I'm going to cum soon!" I said. "Go for it, I'm with you." Tad said. A few more strokes and I cried out as the semen burst from my cock, drowning me in pleasure. There was suddenly something hot and sticky between us. The smell of my sperm hit me, heightening my ecstasy. Tad grunted and released his cum then too. I could feel it jetting between us, mixing with mine, joining us together.

We went a few more strokes, until it became too intense, then fell back side by side. There was semen everywhere. We were both heaving huge sighs, replete with happiness and sex. I looked up at our bodies. "We made a mess," I laughed.

"We sure did."

I rested a few more minutes, letting my breathing return to normal, then got up and wet a washcloth with warm water. I cleaned us both, then crawled into bed and pulled the sheet up around us. "Are you going to stay the night?" I asked.

"If you want me to."

"Of course I want you to. Tad?"

"Yes?"

"I...uh, nothing."

"No, what is it?"

"Nothing. I'll tell you in the morning."

We slept, for a while. During the night, I got the urge to suck his cock. I carefully got over him and pulled the covers back. Tad was on his back, his arms thrown back over his head. It was if he abandoned himself to sleep. His cock lay against his belly, semi-hard. It was a nice cock, I thought. Not too big, or too small, and nicely shaped. As I said before, Tad was cut, with a perfectly proportioned head. I picked it up gently, handling it. It got hard almost immediately. Tad, in his sleep, swiped at my hand, and I dropped it, but then I picked it up again. I gently kissed it from root to tip, smelling his skin and the residue of our lovemaking. I moved my hand up and down slightly. It got harder. Taking a deep breath, I placed my mouth over the head and sucked gently. Tad shifted a little, to give me better access. I hoped that he was having an erotic dream, and that I was the star. I plunged my mouth over him, taking as much of his erection as I could get into my mouth. I sucked hard, tasting a little pre-cum as I did so. Tad groaned a little. Was he still asleep? It was hard to tell. His eyes were still closed. But then I looked again and saw him smiling, still with his eyes closed.

I chuckled, mouth full of Tad's cock. He said, "Didn't you get enough earlier?"

I reluctantly took my mouth off long enough to say, "Sorry man, but I'm a bit besotted with you. I've missed you the past few days, and I'm going to make the most of our time together."

"Well, from the look of my cock, and what I'm feeling, you are certainly a fast learner."

I looked at him. "I want to drink your cum," I said.

"Do you think you're ready to swallow a man's semen?" he asked.

"I think I'm ready to swallow yours," I replied.

He smiled, and opened his legs wider for me. I got down to business. I used every trick I had ever experienced while getting my own cock sucked. I nibbled the shaft like a corn cob, swirled my tongue around the head, flicked the glans, and took him as deeply as I could. Tad groaned and thrust into my mouth. I could tell I was getting to him. It made me feel proud and a little powerful. I had this beautiful man under my control. I was in control of his pleasure. I was the giver, and I was joyfully giving him the best I could. I found it deeply gratifying.

Keeping my mouth on him, I gently grasped his shaft and began tugging at him, while moving my mouth up and down on his head. I knew this would be very intense, so I took it easy for a little while, but gradually I increased the speed and pressure. "Oh baby, suck my big hard cock!" Tad hissed. I gurgled in reply, anxious now for his rush of semen. I had decided to let it spurt down my throat. I didn't know if I was ready for the taste, but one way or another, Tad was cumming in my mouth.

He threw his arms back over his head, spread his legs even wider, thrusting into my avid mouth. He moaned continuously now, and I could tell he was very close. I paid attention to his breathing. When he started gasping in short, sharp breaths, I got ready to receive his essence. Sure enough, Tad grunted, tensed, and said "Oh baby, here it comes!" His cock seemed to swell and then I tasted the slightly alkaline flavor of my lover's semen as it jetted over my tongue. Tad grunted with every spurt, and I sucked gently, milking him dry with my hand and my mouth. I swallowed as fast as I could, and got most of it down. The residue that remained in my mouth did not really taste that bad after all. I crawled up beside him in bed and kissed him deeply. Our tongues swirled together, and he drew mine into his mouth.

"Well, what did you think?" he asked.

"I thought you tasted wonderful. I want to do it again, lots of times."

He smiled at me, and we fell asleep in each other's arms.

The next morning, Tad was up before me. I showered and put on a robe. He was in the kitchen making coffee. I loved to see him moving in my kitchen. He seemed very much at home. I allowed myself a little fantasy for a few moments.

We had coffee together. I felt so happy to be with him. He looked so good in the morning. I was gazing into his eyes when he said, "Cliff, I have something to tell you."

His tone jolted me back to reality. "What?" I asked, suddenly anxious.

"The other night, when you called, I wasn't alone."

"You weren't? Who were you with?" I asked the question, but I already knew the answer before he told me.

"Do you remember the doctor I told you about? The one I had a relationship with?"

Tad was holding his coffee cup tightly, and looking down.

"Don't say it, Tad, please," was all I could get out.

"You don't understand, Cliff. He's separated from his wife. For good this time. He swears he's never going back to her. He needs me, Cliff."

"I don't fucking believe you are saying this, Tad! You are the one who warned me against hurting you! And now this! Shit! He's probably just going to hurt you again." I was so hurt and angry that I couldn't look at him. Tears sprang to my eyes.

"Listen, Cliff. I want you to know that I'll always..."

"Don't say it, dammit!" I was suddenly utterly defeated, overcome by hurt. I looked at him. For the first time I noticed that he was fully dressed.

"I suppose I'd better go," he said, getting up.

"Yes, I suppose you'd better." I still couldn't look at him.

I heard the door close and his car start. Then Tad was gone.

I spent the next three weeks in a fog of sorrow. It hurt so bad that I could hardly stand it. Even the people I worked with noticed. My friend Ron, who worked at the courthouse, tried to snap me out of it. We had a "boys' night out" with beer and football. He even tried to fix me up with his sister. But I had changed. Out of habit, I still looked at women, but they honestly didn't interest me in the same way as before. Being with Tad had outed me, at least to myself. Not that I was interested in other men—yet. But I found that I could look at women dispassionately now, without being interested in them sexually.

And then, one day at the courthouse, deep into a complicated 40-year search of an obscure property in the middle of nowhere, my cell phone vibrated. It was a text message:

"You were right. I was wrong. Coming back to town. Would love to see you. Can we talk? Please call me. Tad.

With trembling fingers, I dialed his number. It rang. There was a click. "Hello?" he said.