A Big Shiny Blue Marble Ch. 05

This was the reason that she never allowed herself to look for love. She smirked for a moment, realizing that she was just sounding a little like her father. She couldn't have known about Dahlgren or what he was, could she?

But it had been a very near thing. She'd liked him so much, and been overjoyed that they liked each other and she had just wanted to express the way that she felt. She knew that it had been the closeness of him and the storm, but it had been there, hadn't it? She'd been so close, so very ready.

He hadn't been someone that she'd seen in a tavern or an inn and had thought that he was nice enough-looking for a quick tumble in the sack -- with all of the clumsy words and the careful, never-trusting way that two people like what she was had to be throughout it all. They had to pretend that it had never happened, didn't they? They had to make certain that they were leaving the room with exactly what they'd brought; each not being able to trust the other enough that they weren't being robbed as they were getting bedded. But both parties were thinking of it anyway, weren't they? They couldn't just enjoy it, they had to think about what they might relieve the other one of the whole time.

Thieves loving like thieves.

This one time, she'd been prepared to open her heart. It had already happened, or she wouldn't be fighting off these tears. This one time, there had been something for her with someone different, just this once.

She'd come so close, she thought. She'd been right there, a hairsbreadth away from stopping him so that she could pull at least one of her long legs out of her pants to really have him. She'd heard him fall asleep a long time after they'd stopped. He just held her and she was in heaven for it. Nobody else had ever done this for her. She'd even asked him, and he'd just smiled against her cheek and admitted that he was smitten.

He'd said that, she remembered. He'd said it just that way.

There was nothing but hurt and confusion in Selena's heart now. When he'd gone to sleep, she'd reached down and found a little of him that was still wet between her thighs. She'd suddenly wanted to know about him, and since he was asleep and against her, there was nothing to do to ease that want in her to know, other than taste what she could of the man who she had hopes to get to know so much better.

And what had that been, she asked herself, what had she tasted?

Demonseed.

She wanted to spit.

She wanted to cry, so she did that, wondering which god that she ought to pray to so that he wouldn't come after her.

She looked back and groaned. There was his horse again, she thought. But she'd needed it to carry things. She'd needed it because she knew that she could sell a fine horse like him to anyone for a quick gold. She knew that he could likely find his horse by feeling for it and going in that direction. She was confident that he'd get it back. It just might cost him, that was all.

Mostly, she needed his horse, so that he couldn't ride it as he came after her.

She thought of the price to herself. She doubted that a thing such as he was would hesitate to walk into any sheriff's office as the priest that they all thought him to be, all high and mighty, and just swear out a warrant for her arrest. She knew that likely no one would find her, but sooner or later, the warrant would just become a price on her head, and someone just like her would come for her, and someone would have to die for it then, wouldn't they?

Selena squeezed her eyes shut for a second.

What had she done?

-----------------------

He'd been here for a time now, thinking of what he might have said or done for this. It still came to nothing in his mind, and so he just accepted that either she'd been her normal thieving self, or she'd seen him as he really was and been frightened.

He left it at that. There was nothing that he could do.

He didn't want to think about Selena anymore. It might cause him to try to examine just what he'd thought he was doing. He didn't come here for what had happened, but the fact that it had happened now only made things worse.

It compounded the difficulty, he told himself.

It introduced too many additional factors, he decided.

It was an undesirable complication, he surmised.

He sighed.

It hurt a little to have had a thought that someone might have cared and he'd ruined it.

He thought of little Nahl'een, the orphan that he'd found and adopted.

He smirked, thankful that at least there was someone who still loved him. He ought to be getting back to her. He might not ever find someone for himself and right now, the truth be told, he didn't want anyone -- not even the horse thief, since it was just too expensive to even have known her for one night.

But he knew that he was somebody to one little girl, the only person who loved him.

That made a lot of things right in his heart.

He walked to the place where the horses had been tied up, snatching up the bundle that was the tent and the bedroll on his way past. Looking out over the plain in the direction of the shithole town, he thought about things for a moment, and then he knew that he was just wasting time.

Dahlgren Runei looked at his hands, covered in the gloves that he made in his mind. He looked at his arm, seeing the bracers which looked completely different to the ones that he wore in reality. His gaze went to the cloak which now disappeared as he assumed his natural shape.

He spread his great wings and took off.

It was far too late in the day to be hanging around at any altitude where he could be seen, so he went higher. The mountains in this range had the occasional herder or homesteaders on them. He went higher still. Satisfied at last, he did his best to fight off the chill of the colder air and the reduced oxygen.

At this height, he'd run out of the few thermals that struggled to exist on a day in the mountains when everything lay under a blanket of snow. It didn't matter anyway, he thought, as he turned to the northeast. His great wings beat slowly, carrying him toward his home, taking him to the mountain orphanage where his daughter waited.

He slowly began to wonder about something. She'd told him her true name. He knew that she hadn't lied when she'd done that -- he'd have felt it if she had. Why had she done that, if she was only going to steal away like a, ... well, a thief in the early morning light?

She'd been truthful to him. That allowed for only one other avenue of thought. She must have awoken before him and seen. That must have been what had happened. He thought about it a little more. She'd stolen his horse again -- and he now knew her real name. Somewhere, someone must know her or of her. He hadn't been able to turn up much of anything before, but with this, ... it was just a bad combination.

For her.

He didn't know what to do about any of it, so he decided to shelve it for the moment. But as soon as he did, he thought of another complication and groaned.

If he was going to collect his daughter, he'd need a horse, wouldn't he?

Nahl'een knew what he was. But only a few of the the monks and the nuns at the orphanage did. He grunted as he changed his course once more. This was turning into a bad day growing worse, he thought.

Within a few minutes, he could see her, just a speck sitting on a larger speck and leading a third one. He thought about it, wondering what she'd do first. The patches of skin in the bottle wouldn't last for long, so he knew that she had to stop off at some town to collect the bounties. There was one up ahead and he waited, having found a rising thermal over some bare ground to ride circling high above her to see if she took the turn or not. He suddenly knew something else about her. It came to him very suddenly. He didn't believe it at first, but when he saw which direction she was heading in, out of the three roads which joined together there, he just knew, and he remembered why he knew the name Meadesbreath.

As soon as she rode off the main road, Dahlgren folded his wings a little to fall streaking earthward like a falcon while he concentrated on not being seen.

---------------------

The old sheriff was long past going out on the road to hunt down fugitives from the law. He knew that. He was just waiting out his time so that he could get to the day when he could hang up the tin badge and become a regular citizen once more. It had been almost thirty years since he'd been asked to take the job.

Thirty years hiding behind the piece of tin. They'd asked him because he was good at finding hiding criminals at the time. He was still good at it. He smiled.

No one had ever asked him how he'd acquired the talent. It was because there had once been a time, back when he was young and stupid, that he'd had to hide in those very same places.

But now he was watching the dates roll by, thankful that there were always some fools who wanted the thrill of bounty hunting.

His thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of a pair of horses coming to the building. He sat up in his chair and looked out of the window.

He snorted. That girl again. One look at her, and he knew that she was more crooked than a cheap nail. He wondered who she was here to rat out this time. She'd better be careful, he thought, one day, she'd likely find that she had a knife in her guts for the trouble.

But then he also knew that she really could bring them in. Well not them, specifically. She always brought their hides. He didn't care, as long as the numbers and markings matched up, that was all that he cared about.

Selena walked in, a little rushed-looking as she tried to remember the alias that she used here when she had any dealings with the old sheriff. "Hey, Bartholomew," she grinned at last.

"You know, Daisy," he grumbled good-naturedly, "I'd really like it if one day, before I hang this job up soon, you could just call me Bart."

"Sure, Bart," she said, "I'll try to do better."

Selena beamed at him. His name for her was just something that he'd decided on one day, since it sure didn't fit her, but in calling her that, she'd clued in that he knew her as Shalen Throckmorton, the most ridiculous thing that she could think of the first time that she'd walked in. She heaved a small sigh. At least now she knew what to sign in the book when he paid her.

"What have you got for me this time?" he smiled at her in spite of himself.

"Oh, it's gonna be an expensive day for you, Bart."

When they were done, he closed the cashbox after she'd signed for the money. "Where are the bodies? he asked.

"I left them in the street, mostly," she said, "a little place called Bruster, on the other side of the range. It's such a shit heap that I doubt that anyone will think anything of it, unless they start to trip over them. They sure won't be able to pick them out by smell in that hole."

He nodded and asked her where she was off to, and she replied in the same manner that she always did, telling him that she was off to blow the money on food, a barrel of beer, and whatever cheap male company the change from that would buy her.

He nodded, believing none of it. He hadn't been alive this long to not know a lonely person when he saw her. He wished her well in any regard and sat back down in his chair.

Outside, Selena's mood changed abruptly. There was only one horse there, where she'd left two tied up only minutes before.

Selena looked around with murder in her eye, until she saw that her horse was carrying an additional set of saddlebags slung over the saddle, of all places. They had the rest of the food in them and the single bottle of ale that they hadn't consumed last night.

There in the mud and snow, someone had written with a stick or something, she supposed. She stepped forward, sliding her boot over the message as she moved the saddlebags to the front of the saddle over her mare's shoulders. She was up onto her horse as in a flash and walking her out onto the main road as quickly as she could without attracting too much attention.

It was the message that bothered her. It was written in the way that she'd learned while she'd been running with the thieves. How could he know of it? It was designed so that no one outside of their group would be able to read it. All that it said was, "I'm sorry. Dahl."

-------------------

It took her the rest of the day to make it to her home. In the area in which she lived, the little valleys seemed to exist right on the edge of winter. It got cold sometimes, but it rarely snowed. That had allowed her to pick up the pace for the last dash home.

She tied up her horse by the trough and thought to get her unsaddled and into the barn in a little while. For now, she just wanted to make certain that her home was still secure and that no one had broken in. After walking around the house, looking for disturbed windows, she walked to the porch silently; stepping over the plank that she knew would groan loudly if it was tread upon. That was why she'd never fixed it.

Leaning forward, she peered in the failing light at the gap in the door, looking for the hair that she'd glued there when she'd left.

Satisfied that there was nothing untoward about the only door to the place, Selena was reaching for the key in her pocket when the door opened and she almost fell off the small porch.

"You!"

He smirked as he looked at her. "You know, I've always thought that something like that would be a rather stupid way to address somebody. Who else would it be? Anyone in front of you would fit the statement, don't you think?"

Selena scrambled backwards as he came through the doorway.

"G-Get out of my house!"

He began to chuckle, "You're a little late. I am out of your house." He looked at himself, the human that she'd liked, the one that she'd sat in the inn with, the one that she'd almost, ....

He shook his head and grunted. All of it was gone in an instant, and she was looking at something that had bothered her to no end that morning.

"G-get away from me! Leave me alone!" she backpedaled and this time, she really did fall onto her backside. He laughed and sat down on the porch.

"If you're done with all of this nonsense," he said, "I'd like to talk to you. I know that you don't want to talk with me at all, but you're going to listen to what I have to say anyway. Considering that you stole my horse again, I'd say that you're going to get off pretty lightly. I think that if it were anyone else, I'd just kill them for it and be done."

"I don't want to talk to you!" she said.

"I know that," he smiled, "but you're going to at least listen, because if you don't, well, ...

I'd never hurt you, unless you steal my horse a third time, maybe. But I give you my word that I won't hurt you at all." His face took on a satisfied look for a second, "Though I might just kiss you, just to make you squirm."

She looked a little doubtful. "You won't hurt me?"

He shook his head, "No. Why would I? All that I want is that you listen to me for a few minutes. You do that," he nodded, "and I'll leave you alone."

"Talk then," she said.

He nodded, "I'd like you to consider something."

"I don't want to HEAR any OFFERS!" she cried out, her hands moving to clamp themselves over her ears. "I won't listen! Be gone from here!

He rolled his eyes.

"MURDER AND DEATH!" he bellowed with a roar of frustration, flinging out his arm to the side. Halfway up the slope, almost a quarter mile away, a tree exploded.

Selena jumped with a scream as the top of the tree fell down in a ball of flame. When she looked at Dahlgren, his face was set in a look of annoyance. She began to whimper.

His eyebrows rose. "Oh. Look at that, As long as I act like I'm civilized, you'll run from me, or shout at me and even try to shut me out. But if I act the way that you think a demon might behave, well then I have your attention.

Just for your own safety at some other point in your life, your assumption is very wrong. I did nothing to harm you and I never would. I can imagine how you might feel. And I know what lies in your past.

I helped you with no thought of myself." He looked down and continued quietly. "Other than my wonder at how it felt to feel the affection of someone like you."

He looked up, "In return, you left without a word and stole my horse again. I have had to chase you to get him back, and you ought to consider that if it were not for how I felt about you, I would have struck you down like that tree over there long before you reached the town to claim your bounties. I could have fried you alive before you left the mountain range. But I haven't, have I?" He shook his head.

"You wish to hear no offers," he said, "What sort of drivel is that? It only shows your ignorance. I will make no offers! I want nothing from you! I only want to tell you that I'm sorry for anything that I did if I frightened you at all. I don't even know what I did!"

He sat in silence as she wept. After a time, he leaned forward a little, and she looked up. The thing in front of her looked so sad, she thought. All the same, he was a, ...

"I know what I am, "he said quietly," I am one who can read a little of the minds of those that I care to know -- whether it is because I hunt them, or because I care about them. It's a small circle, as you said. I know what I am, Selena Meadesbreath.

The trouble is that you do not.

I wouldn't mind it at all but for a few reasons.

I had no plan to do what we did last night. I know how many people see me. I know that there is nothing but fear in their hearts for me, just as it is in yours now. I just couldn't think of anything else to do. You left the town and forgot everything. If I didn't think that you would freeze to death, I wouldn't have stayed longer than to give you that bottle. But we both know that you didn't want that. You wanted me to stay. I should have told you what I am right away and left. And then, you wouldn't have slept a wink, even if I'd given you my tent.

I didn't lie to you or try to trick you. I -- I wanted, ... I wanted to know you. I wanted to know someone who might care just a little about me. I'm sorry if what I am causes you fear."

He sighed, "I'm sorry that I was wrong about you."

He looked around. "I know this place. Something happened here years ago. I was not even on this plane when it did, but I know what happened. When I was sent back here, the first thing that I was told - the first issue that was given to me, one that I could not decline, was to find the ones who did what was done here. I hunted them for half a year, red demons, loose on earth somehow.

I found them and I killed them -- as I was commanded to do. I nailed their skins to the posts in the town here, and then I left."

He looked at her for a moment, "I just didn't know that the one that I liked so much to see was one of the afflicted family. I only learned your name last night and thought it through today."

The cold wetness of the rain-sodden grass had found its way through the cloth of her pants and Selena realized that her ass was wet. At first, she wanted to squirm a little under his gaze, but then her courage came back to her and she just glared at him. "What, Dahlgren?" she asked, "If that's even your real name, why are you looking at me like that?"

"I do not think that you could understand, "he said sadly, "And that is my name. I am not what you think, Selena. I am not what you fear -- but I can see that the part of me that bothers you is plenty for your hatred. I was fine and good enough to hold your interest as a man, but like this, ..."

He smirked, "Well I know it is a different thing altogether, isn't it? There is little about me for you to like now and that's alright I guess, since I cannot change the way that you feel."