A Correspondence with Sharon Ch. 10

Part 10: Sharon's life takes an unexpected but exciting turn.

This is the continuation of an email correspondence I had with a woman named Sharon Alderson. If you have not read the previous parts I suggest you go back and read from the beginning to get the full background. This conversation includes elements of wife swapping/sharing and group sex. If you don't approve of these behaviors then don't read on.

Jan 01/21/09 9:34 PM

Sharon,

I was happy to hear from you again. I figured that something was keeping you busy and was hoping that eventually the situation would change. I know how addicting the Internet can be. I love to peruse science sites and blogs and can sometimes get so involved with them that I lose track of my time to the exclusion of my other activities. Even activities I enjoy like writing my stories or playing guitar. I've found it's important to set priorities and time limits on things so that I don't spend all my time on black holes like the Internet or reading Science Fiction books. Speaking of books, that's one of my wifes obsessions. Sometimes she will spend an entire day just reading some romance novel. Yeah, I know, yeach - how can she read those things? The point is that you are not unusual in this regard, many people have obsessions that they must always manage. Prioritize and set time limits. Works for me anyway.

You're going to laugh at this, but when I get your emails I read a little, maybe a paragraph or two, then I go do something else for a little while and just let your words sink in. Then I come back and read a little more. It's my way of making it last longer, kind of like how you might eat your favorite desert slowly as you savor it. OK, so it's weird, but I thought you might be interested. You can stop laughing now. :-)

Well, that party did not go the way either of us thought it would. I would have bet that Ron would have been first in line to fuck you. But I guess that Tim being his boss gets to line jump. Actually from the way you described it, it seemed to me that you were somewhat disappointed by the "get together", even though you did enjoy having sex with Tim. What did Joe think about it? I'll bet he was disappointed that he didn't get to watch Tim fuck you. He also probably claimed that the blowjob that "air head" gave him was OK, but not as good as yours. I'm wondering if the BJ was just a little payback for not getting to watch you with Tim, but I could be wrong about that.

It seems to me that your jealousy of Joe's activities at these "get togethers" could cause longer term friction in your relationship if you don't find a way to resolve it. Have you considered talking to Joe about it and admitting the jealous feelings?

Well, that's all I have time for now; I need to practice my guitar or I'll never get better. I'm looking forward to your next email.

Hugs,

Paul.

Jan 01/23/09 5:55 PM

Sharon,

I have a few followup questions about the Saturday night party that have occurred to me since I replied last:

When you first got there and realized that you were the only woman present (so far), you told me that you were wondering if you were the entertainment for the evening. What were your feelings at that point?

Even though you had already decided to just let things happen before you got there, were you reconsidering that position when you thought you might be the only female there? In other words, if it had turned out to be a gangbang, would you have let that happen?

I'm assuming for the following questions that you and Joe have already talked about this party and I'm hoping you know the answers. If not, that's OK, I just have to ask.

Did Joe know there would be other women there, or like you, did he think that you might be the only one when you first arrived? If the latter then what were his feelings about that?

If it had turned out to be a four-on-one situation, would he have let that happen? If so, does it excite him to think about it actually happening?

OK, so I'm a pervert. I can live with that ;-)

Your dirty old friend,

Paul.

Jan 01/23/09 7:25 PM

Paul,

Good questions!!

When we first got there and I was the only woman. I immediately felt it was a set up for a gang bang. I was so sure of it that I was surprised when the other couples arrived. I still think it was supposed to be a gang bang. In my opinion, Ron was surprised when the other couples showed up.

The eating machine and her husband were invited but I think it was one of those invites that was made knowing they wouldn't be there. They did not fit at all with the usual people that go to Ron's parties.

Ron had a very obvious attraction for the air head but they didn't fit the party either. I'm sure they were a surprise too. He invited them because he wanted to take a shot at her but again never expected them to actually be there. if the two couples weren't expected then I was to be the entertainment.

When I realized that I was most likely going to be the only woman, I did have second thoughts. I was prepared mentally to have sex with Ron. I wasn't prepared for a gang bang. I had mixed feelings about it. Part of me was saying no way and part of me was saying why not. No way was winning. Had I of been told ahead of time that this would be a possibility, it would have been different. Fortunately, the other couples came before I had to make a decision.

Like me, Joe had no idea Diane wouldn't be there and assumed it was couples who were invited. He was just as surprised as I was. He also thinks Ron was setting up a gang bang. He was unsure about it too but the idea excited him. He would have been OK with it if it happened.

Sharon

Jan 01/24/09 2:36 PM

Sharon,

In your last reply you said at one point:

I wasn't prepared for a gang bang. I had mixed feelings about it. Part of me was saying no way and part of me was saying why not. No way was winning. Had I of been told ahead of time that this would be a possibility, it would have been different.

That last sentence really got my attention. The implication is that had you known that potentially you would be the only woman there you would have not only still gone to the party, but you would also have participated in a gang bang. Is this an accurate assessment? If so, does your husband know this too? The future implications are very interesting depending on how you answer those questions.

Curious as ever,

Paul.

Jan 01/25/09 9:47 PM

Paul

What I meant when I said it would have been different if I knew ahead of time has a whole other meaning. I was upset because this was sprung on me without prior knowledge. The issue there was that Joe didn't discuss it with me. If he really wanted that to happen, we should have talked about it.

You do bring up an interesting point. Would I have said OK and still gone knowing I was expected to have sex with 4 guys? I've thought about that all day. The answer is yes.

I know that answer is going to bring other questions so go ahead and ask.

Sharon

Jan 01/25/09 10:41 PM

Sharon,

You said that you thought about it all day, but what were you thinking about, the answer or the implications of the answer? That's all I have to ask about the Saturday night party just after Christmas.

What else have you been up to lately?

Your friend,

Paul.

Jan 01/27/09 10:10 PM

Sharon,

I took some time recently to review all of our correspondence and I decided that I had lost some of my objectivity at one point. Our relationship will be the most useful to us both if I maintain a little emotional distance. I also realized that while making some observations occasionally, where I can help add some perspective, I need to suppress the impulse to give you advice. I'm not privy to many details about you and your life which makes my advice ill informed at best and moralizing at worst. You need an ear to bend, a dispassionate listener, and above all a non-judgmental sounding board. I assure you that I will do my best to be all these things for you. I won't lie, sometimes this will be difficult for me, however your friendship and trust are worth it. Besides, these are skills I need to hone if I'm to become a better study of human nature, and as a result, a better writer.

Just something that I've been thinking about for a while and I wanted to communicate with you. Now back to our normal, erotic discussions.

My best wishes,

Paul.

Jan 01/28/09 3:20 PM

Paul,

Your e-mail brought a smile to my face. Sounds to me that you caught yourself getting too attached to me. I was afraid of that and caught it myself a while back. Hey, the two of us have been open and honest with each other. Many husbands and wives don't even share that. The bottom line is that we are friends. I would have to say close friends. Regular friends don't know as much about each other as we do.

We have a pen pal type relationship that makes honesty and openness possible. Sure, I care about you and I know you care about me. That is just part of being friends. I don't want you as a lover, boyfriend or, husband. That would ruin the relationship we have. What I want is the freedom to get on the computer and write my friend about things I like and dislike. You are intelligent and sincere so you make the perfect friend.

By the way, Joe has decided to grow a beard and I hate it. I'll bet it is gone soon!!

Just be you and I'll just be me. It has worked pretty good so far.

Sharon

Feb 02/02/09 11:11 PM

Sharon,

I had an interesting conversation with my wife about a week ago. We were watching TV and on the show we were watching there was a woman that had an affair with a man she had just met because he was "hot". That's what started the conversation.

"I couldn't do that that." My wife commented.

"Hmmm, I suppose you need a more emotional connection with a man first." I replied.

"Yes, I do." She said.

"What about those one night stands you told me about before we were married." I responded. She had told me about two times she had sex with someone just once while she was in college. One of them was coworker she had known for a while and the other one was someone she had in a class and studied with.

"What about them?" She questioned.

"So you must have known them better than I realized." I pressed.

"No, not really. I was just curious." She explained.

"Just curious?" I asked. "About what?"

"About what it would be like to have sex with them." She answered. "And there were only two of them."

I could have pressed for more details, but I know my wife and I didn't think I would get any more at that time, so I switched gears slightly. "What about Doug?" I asked.

"Doug?" Again playing dumb.

"The geeky guy from High School that had a crush on you." I answered.

"Oh, him." She said as if she bought guys home to have sex with all the time. "I was just curious about him too. He was always so sweet to me."

I didn't question her about why she was curious since I was pretty sure it was because he was a lot like me back then. I was more interested in making a point anyway and didn't want to loose momentum. "So with all of them you were just curious; you didn't have an emotional bond with any of them."

"Um, well, yeah, pretty much." She admitted.

"But it does look like you need to know them for a while, to build some trust before you can act on your curiosity." I observed.

"Something like that." She said. "Maybe not trust exactly, but at least comfortable with."

"Well let me know if you get curious about anybody else." I remarked.

"I don't think so." She said, but not in a "absolutely not, what the hell are you thinking" kind of tone, more like a "I think he would reject me and I don't want to risk the embarrassment" tone.

I didn't press it at the time, but the unsaid objection was "I'm too old and fat." I'll continue to push her subtly to try flirting with this guy. In the mean time if I can get her to exercise more and eat better I think she can lose weight. We'll see.

Now if I know you at all, Sharon, you've been up to some sexy fun since the Saturday night party just after Christmas. Come on - spill the beans!

Paul.

Feb 02/03/09 4:09 AM

Hi Paul,

Maybe it is because I am another woman but I understand what your wife means by being curious. I've been curious about a number of men myself. Curious for me means that I think about it but nothing more happens.

I do disagree with her fear of being rejected because of her weight. In my experiences with men, I've found that men don't turn down sex because of weight. Back when I worked for the concrete company there was a really nice girl named Cassie. She was a bit overweight but not obese. Even though she was married, She always got turned on by the Marboro man type of guy. There was this one driver that she just drooled over. He was a worn jeans, flannel shirt, unshaven, rough looking sort. Every time this guy walked into the building, Cassie got excited but he never seemed that interested in her. One day, I was in the break room getting a coffee and saw him sitting there waiting for his load slips. We were the only two there.

Without saying a word, I got my coffee and was ready to leave when Cassie walked in. She knew he was there. I agreed to sit and have my coffee with her while she stared dreamy eyed at this guy. I kept telling her to go over and talk to him but she was afraid of being rejected because of her weight. She was convinced that he would never want anything to do with her weight. Cassie stayed as long as she could but had to get back to her desk.

After she left, I went over to the guy and sat down. There was no time to be coy. I just came straight out and told him that Cassie had a thing for him. He grinned and said she was married and not really his type anyway. I was blunt and told him that she wasn't looking for a new husband, just sex. Then I started to get up and he stopped me because now he had a sudden interest in this girl that a minute ago wasn't his type. I assured him that he could have her anytime he wanted.

Not long after that, the two of them began an affair that was still active when I left the company.

Nothing interesting has been happening in my life. I'm still not real happy about the Christmas party. I'm convinced that it was supposed to be a gang bang with me as the featured attraction. In my mind, I think Joe was afraid I would tell him he was crazy if he suggested it ahead of time but thought I might go along with it if it just kind of happened. I also think Ron was the one who pushed it and both thought I would do it. Both of them are aware of the fact that I love sex and I think they believe I will do about anything. Well, they are only half right.

I told Joe that I think we need to distance ourselves from Ron for a while. Things seemed to be moving too fast there and in a direction I'm not sure I wanted to take. Joe has been somewhat disappointed but seems to understand. He even agrees that he was getting caught up in all of it too. The results are that no much has been happening recently. Things could start up again. We are supposed to go to an Elks dance on Valentine's day with Ron and Diane. Joe has mentioned a few times about the after dance party that is scheduled. Ron's boss is having the party at his house. I don't think I would be set up for another gang bang but who knows.

Sharon

Feb 02/04/09 8:17 PM

Sharon,

I understand what you are saying about being curious; hell, I've been curious about many women (including you), but of course that's natural and harmless. Nothing wrong with that, but then that was not my point. My point was that mere curiosity (and familiarity) was enough for my wife to seek sex with three different men before we were married. A deep/meaningful emotional connection was not necessary in those cases, contrary to her previous statements on the matter. So that brings me back to my prior conclusion: if I can find the right guy, someone she can be comfortable with and is curious about, then there's a chance that I may still be able to witness her having sex with another man.

As far as the weight thing goes, I agree with you, but so far I have not been able to convince her. I guess I'll just have to keep being supportive and hope she eventually figures out that there's a lot more to sexiness than just physical appearance.

I was thinking about what you said about the "Christmas Party" and your belief that both Ron and Joe had planned it to be a gang bang for you. If so, it was kind of ill planned. I mean if they had really wanted to ensure that you would be the only woman there they should not have invited the other couples. Ron could easily have lied, had you asked, and claimed that he invited them, but that they didn't show. So either you are wrong and it wasn't a setup from the start, or Ron is not too smart. I guess you'll have to decide. I do wonder, however, if you have considered telling Joe that you would probably agree to something like that if he asked you about it ahead of time? Also, have you thought about telling him about your jealousy when he's with other woman at these "get togethers"? Just something to think about.

Paul.

Feb 02/07/09 9:02 PM

Hi Paul

I still think that the Christmas party was a planned gang bang. It may have been ill planned but it was still supposed to be one. Joe still claims it wasn't and if anything like that was planned, it was Ron's idea.

During recent conversations with Joe, I have found that he is very excited about this kind of different lifestyle. We talked about it last night and had an even longer conversation about it this afternoon. While I had a pretty active past sexually, he was always conservative and not into things like multiple sex partners. He claims that he never had the opportunity until now. In my opinion this is just a passing phase with him and a kind of middle age crisis.

I did tell him that I do get jealous feelings when I see him with another woman. He claims to get jealous feelings too but says that is part of the excitement for him. He told me, and I believe him, that he isn't interested in having sex with another woman. The excitement for him is in sharing me. I don't fully understand why that is so exciting for him but I'm certain he is telling the truth.

During our conversation today, I brought up the gang bang subject. I just came straight out and asked him if he would like to see me involved in a gang bang. (I really don't like that term but it is appropriate) I had to assure him that I wouldn't be angry regardless of his answer. He finally said he would and admitted that it would be exciting. After he said that, he just sat there as if waiting for me to give him a lecture about his perversions. I asked again if he really wanted that and again if he was sure he wanted that. Both times he responded in the affirmative but qualified his answer by saying he would never try to push me into anything like that. He was certain I would never consider it

We were having lunch and I just casually said to him "Why don't you set it up?"

His jaw about hit the table. It took a little while to convince him I was serious. I can tell you like I told him, I am serious about it. Still questioning my sincerity, he asked when I would like this to happen? I surprised him again by saying "This afternoon if you want."

We both agreed that wasn't practical but also agreed it had better happen soon before I think too long about it and change my mind. On the way home, Joe asked if there was anyone I would like for him to invite? I told him that I didn't care who he invited since it was just going to be sex. My only stipulation was that I didn't want anyone who was too big. He questioned about how he would know who was too big and who wasn't.