"Me too," she said, stroking him as they walked into the men's locker room.
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hornyquad, starmann2000 and 3 other people favorited this story!
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English
goodish
but fucken horrable ending & really "i'm worried because i'm small" & he has a 7 incher, small Really what a load of crap
Well done. Truly enjoyed the story.
The "staccato" type paragraphs do not normally appeal to me. In this instance I think they worked very well; helped put the reader in the mind of the teller.
Going to give this 5 stars.more...
Paragraphing?
Good story. But making every sentence its own paragraph is disconcerting.
Certainly in dialogue you have to. With transitions between speakers, which you have, you can run them afterward or before. The effect will be more readable.
I hope you'll do a second chapter of this. Progress is everything.more...
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