A God Called Bruce Pt. 05

I considered that for a moment. What Frank was proposing had to be a possibility. While I was still trying to get a grip on what he had just said Betty turned up.

"No more work today," she said. "Party time."

Reluctantly Frank and I went inside. Marge had already laid out the table. She had made the same meal she had once made for me before, right at the beginning. Lobster Thermidore with all the trimmings. The moment the meal was over Marge cleaned up with a wave of her hand grabbed Frank and disappeared. I felt awkward. Betty sensed the mood I was in.

"Feels like incest after all these years as friends," she said. "Come on boy, stick a bit into mum. You know you want to."

I had to laugh. It broke the ice. A short time later I was drilling her with the precision of a sewing machine.

Chapter 43: Machines in charge?

To my surprise I woke up with Marge at my side. She must have switched position with Betty during the night. It suited me fine. I still felt odd about having screwed Betty.

"Get out of that silly mood, there is work to be done."

Marge was right. I had to pull myself together. We went for breakfast and during the meal I started feeling better. Darrin was ready, the equipment had been loaded into our space vehicle.

Vulcan was already at the controls when we got there and a short time later we were on the Blue Planet as Betty had christened it. I thought it quaint to have a planet called after the hair colour of its inhabitants.

There was the usual commotion. Everyone dropped what they were doing and came to greet us. I gave the headman his by now usual hug amongst much applause. This time he hadn't tried to prostrate himself, he evidently got the message that I didn't like that. He remembered the boys from before and greeted them cordially. I told him what we were here to do and the villagers watched as the boys set up the terminal.

If I had any reservations about the villagers accepting the technology, they were soon put to rest. They thought it was great fun, especially when Bruce and Marge came on the screen. Bruce introduced them to Betty who was quickly accepted into the fold. Betty showed them some images from our world. The fields, the creeks, the lake with its island and finally Catsville. Judging by the response the villagers loved what they saw. I didn't think we would have any shortage of recruits for our world.

Marge and Bruce turned up and soon food and beer arrived from everywhere. We all had an impromptu picnic in the temple. One of the ladies tugged at my sleeve and said: "Wanna fucky me again, Johnny?" Bruce's language pupil once more, by the sound of it. I liked the idea and it was on. Within minutes Alec worship was in full swing. When we all had had enough we took our farewells and departed for home on wobbly knees.

"Wow," said Betty, who had been watching the orgy. "I have never seen anything like it. They really get into it. And I thought I knew all about swinging."

"Yes, they certainly took up Alec worship with enthusiasm when Bruce suggested it."

"No," Betty was adamant, "this is not a recent thing. These people have been having sex like this for a long time. It is their way. Bruce just gave it an added dimension."

"What makes you say this?" I was curious how Betty had come to that conclusion.

"If it was a recent thing," she explained, "there would be some who would take to it with gusto, others would join, but still be a little reserved and yet others would be watching from the sidelines and contemplate whether they wanted to join in or not. Last of all there would be a group who would find the whole thing disgusting and wouldn't have anything to do with it. There was none of that. No, for these people this is the normal way of having sex. I'll have to look into this. Fascinating territory for me."

"You are the anthropologist. You must have your reasons." I was still not convinced.

"You've been there. There were no fights, no arguments. Each person's choice was accepted by the others without problems. This reeks of very formalised behaviour. Rigid rules as to what is acceptable and what is not. Things like this do not spring up over night."

I had to admit Betty was on fairly solid ground there. I was glad she was part of the team. Her help would be invaluable. I said as much.

"Glad to be here," she said. "By the way, if you would like to stick a bit into mum again from time to time, all you have to do is say something."

To my surprise, the thought wasn't anywhere near as awkward as it was yesterday. I kissed her cheek and said I would give it some thought.

Marge was home when I got there.

"Here," she said, "have some Ambrosia. We need it after that romp."

"I thought that was exclusive to Olympus. Do you want us to go there?"

"No need, I fixed that." She opened what had once been a broom cupboard to reveal a fair sized room. There were two Roman divans and a low table between them with two goblets.

"I pinched a bit more space from Olympus. I figured if it would work on Earth it would work here. Voilà, Ambrosia."

"Isn't that dangerous? The Gods could come here without trouble."

"It wouldn't do them much good, even if they did find out about it. They would still need Endora's permission to cross over into our world. We are quite safe from them. The Gods aren't very clever about such things. They haven't found out about Zeus' shagging room in your house, have they?"

"How the fuck do you know about that?" I was stunned.

"Logical deduction. I know he is rooting humans. You can tell by how happy he is lately. He doesn't go to Shagger's Paradise and I haven't built anything for him elsewhere. Where else would he go? That's why you guys are as thick as thieves. You are covering for him."

There went my last secret I thought I had from Marge. This chick was dangerous. She had figured out the thing with the Fates, and now this.

"Tell me Marge, you are smarter than most of the Gods combined, how come you are a lowly Goddess of hen parties in a backwater of your universe?"

"For the same reason Bruce likes to be seen as some pisspot drongo. You know by now he's a lot smarter than that. We both decided a long time ago that there was mileage in being underestimated. We have no enemies. The Gods can't be bothered with us."

"How come you have put your guard down where I am concerned then?"

"Probably for the same reason Zeus trusts you. You are irreverent, sneaky, obnoxious at times and all the rest, but you are fiercely loyal to your friends. That last thing is a quality rarely found on Olympus."

I had my Ambrosia. It went down well. It made me physically fit again.

I told her about Frank's thoughts on the controllers.

Marge's face lit up like a Christmas tree. "That's it," she exclaimed.

She hexed us another Ambrosia and motioned me to drink mine. For the next ten minutes she just sat there and thought. I did not want to interrupt her. Marge got up, took me by the hand and led me back into our space. She closed the door very carefully. Marge led me out to the veranda, bade me sit down and put some champagne on the table and two glasses.

I did the honours pouring the drinks and lit a cigarette. "What are we celebrating?" I asked.

Marge made some funny signs in the air again and seconds later Kia was there. She hexed a bowl, poured some champagne into it and asked Kia to join the celebrations. I could see it in Kia's eyes, she was as clueless as I was. She obviously wasn't snooping right now.

Marge explained to Kia what Frank had been thinking.

"Frank is right," she said, "there is a rivalling system that controls Olympus and Earth and maybe a lot of other things. Kia stumbled into it. I think it only vaguely perceived her presence and tried to kill her. The system probably thinks it has succeeded. For the time being it's not a good idea for Kia to go back there.

"Also, they don't know about us and this set-up of ours. It's not part of the model they are using. Lateral thinking is not within their reach. They are machines, remember. I don't think they are aware of Kia even. They just noticed something was trying to stick their nose into their affairs and activated a defence programme. Kia is transparent to them because of what she is. That's why she was able to follow the Fates to their home world.

"As to the rest of us, we are nobodies. Bruce and I, two Gods in charge of minor events in a backwater, Darrin and Algenon, back room technicians, Gadeirus, a has been who hasn't done anything significant for millennia, Vulcan, a second rate God who is not liked by bis peers and finally Alec, a two bit writer who can't think of something to write. Lil doesn't even rate. Do you get it? All of us are below the radar as far as that system is concerned. That's why we've been able to do what we did. And now we are totally out of their reach because of where we are. That gives us one hell of an advantage."

"What about the Fates?" Kia was nervous.

"I thought you said that you can fix that dilemma if the controllers allow it. Just fix it, they won't know. As long as the Fates do their job the system has no reason to check on them. It won't even know the Fates are no longer what they were. Incidentally, what do you have in mind?"

"I want to compartmentalise their minds. When they are working they won't remember more of us than that we exist and are their friends. When they are with us they can remember everything. No more qualms about what they are doing. I can do this easily."

"Then do it. When you have done it I would like you to go back to the Deer planet and put everything I've told you to them. Let them have a look if there is anything I've missed."

"I like this," said Kia, finished her champagne and dematerialised.

"A two bit writer who can't think of something to write?" I was a bit miffed.

"What else would you call it, Darling? Get over it. Here, have some more champagne."

I can't be cross with Marge. I drank my champagne and kept my mouth shut, knowing I couldn't win.

"Now I need to go to Catsville, I have a few things to do. See you tonight." And off she went."

It had been a while since I had a one on one drinking session with Bruce. On the spur of the moment I called him.

"Fancy a drink or three at my place in Sydney?" I asked when he turned up.

"You bet, give us a sec," he said and disappeared again.

"Just had to tell the girls they are on their own tonight," he explained when he got back. "Let's go."

Bruce had a bag in his hand when we arrived in my backyard. "Fresh king prawns," he said. "Fancy chilli coconut prawns?"

"Now that's a treat," I said. "On a bit of rice perchance?"

"No problem."

Bruce conjured up a bowl, half full of marinade, put the prawns in the marinade and hexed some beer.

"Doesn't taste the same if I hex the marinade on, it's better if they stay in there for a while," he explained.

"Bruce, can we go to the lunch room in the compound on Olympus please, I've made a mistake."

"Sure," he said and we ported.

I instructed Endora to keep any visitors out.

"What was that all about?" asked Bruce when we were settled.

"I forgot how many creatures can listen in in that place. There is that fucking woodpecker for one, and maybe Zeus and Hera and God knows who else."

"Either you are getting paranoid or what you are about to tell me is dynamite."

"No paranoia. What do you think Zeus will do when he finds out he is being controlled by a machine?"

"You are joking, of course." Bruce looked at me, a puzzled look on his face. "You are not joking, are you?" he decided after a pause.

"I wish I were," I said.

I then told him what Frank and Marge had come up with without mentioning Kia.

"You have a real penchant for pissing in hornets nests. I tell you what Zeus will do if he finds out. Assuming this is right, he'll kill anyone who knows about this, just like he did when Asclepius did something the machines didn't want. The system will not let him act otherwise. If I were you I would leave this whole can of worms well alone."

"But we can't stand by and watch Earth and Olympus being run by a computer, can we?"

"And why not? Do you really think an omnipotent Zeus would do a better job? You have only seen the benevolent side of him. I have seen the other side. You don't want to be around when he or Poseidon let loose, believe me. Frank reckons the builders of this thing didn't want to throw their charges to the wolves. If that is right, the machines are essentially benevolent. They are making sure Zeus and his minions don't get too big for their boots. If you tamper with that you don't know what cataclysm you bring about."

That was certainly an aspect I hadn't considered.

"And now, seeing that the prawns are ready let's get into them. That other shit can wait."

The meal was delicious. When I got home Marge was already in bed.

Horny as usual.

Chapter 44: Preparations for the big event

I woke up refreshed and relaxed. Bruce's talk the night before had done much to quieten my inner turmoil.

Breakfast was different this time. For once Bruce wasn't cooking. The girls had taken over. Two of the girls, one a baker, the other one a chef, had commandeered the kitchen. They had been at it since before dawn, according to Bruce, and had provided us with fresh bread and croissants, jams and creamed cottage cheese in addition to the normal barbequed stuff. They received a standing ovation when they joined us for their meal.

You could tell Bruce was proud of his girls. It had been his idea and it was working a treat. After the dishes were cleared away one of the girls climbed on the table and announced that as of tomorrow their pussies were going to be useful once more and showed us her neatly trimmed bush as an appetiser. There was roaring applause.

Tomorrow the delegation would also arrive, lots to do until then.

Gadeirus took me around to show me the arrangements. The accommodation was fitted out with the furniture and implements of their culture. It was a large, three story house adjacent to the pub that would easily house twenty or more natives. It had a native style kitchen, stocked with food from their home planet.

One section of the pub kitchen had also been fitted out with native paraphernalia and stocked with their food. We were as ready as we would get, I was happy.

Marge turned up and grabbed me by the arm. "Come," she said, "let me show you the nookie room."

Gadeirus grinned, evidently he knew already what that was about. There was a new staircase in the foyer of the pub leading into a basement. When I saw what was down there I nearly had a fit. Marge had created a scaled down version of my temple underneath the pub, complete with the moss cover that made such a beautiful mattress and the neat gravel paths.

"I thought I told you I didn't want a temple here." I was more than miffed.

"That's why I call it a nookie room. The Blueys invited us to their party, they expect us to invite them to ours. Where do you want to screw? On the veranda?"

As usual Marge was right. If, as Betty suspected, communal sex was the only sex the natives engaged in, a place like this was mandatory. I wondered where the name Blueys had come from, probably Betty. It was as good a name as any, in fact it was very good, it had an affectionate ring to it.

Back upstairs Betty was talking to the Blueys via her video link. There were a number of natives in front of their set and from the screeching, laughing and general carrying on I figured they were having a lot of fun. I left them to it.

Lunch was a sensation. Beef consomme with small flour dumplings, steak and kidney stew with mashed potatoes and green beans, apple pie with whipped cream for afters. It met with universal approval. Bruce doesn't like cooking stuff like this, but he certainly got into it with enthusiasm when he was served with it. Marge congratulated the girls on their skill. High praise indeed, coming from her.

After the meal Betty told me she wanted to address everyone before the delegation arrived to inform them of some Bluey customs and taboos they ought to know. We decided that right after the evening meal would be a good time.

I went to see Lil at Shagger's to tell her about Betty's briefing and that I wanted her to attend. She promised she would be there.

After that I went to my cabin and sat on the veranda with a beer. The little possum must have been sitting in a tree waiting for me. I had hardly sat down when he rushed over to me, climbed on my shoulder and started nibbling my earlobe. I had a fair idea what he was after.

He stayed on my shoulder as I went to the fridge to get a banana for him. I peeled it and cut it into bite size pieces put it on a saucer and got another saucer for his beer. The little shit went nuts on my shoulder, hopping around and licking my neck. I went back to the table, put the stuff down and poured him a beer. He hopped down and did his little war dance again before he got into the food and the beer.

It was hard to miss. Didi was happy.

I gave him some more beer when he had finished his and again he drunk only some of it. I was playing with him and giving him some pats when Bruce and Lil arrived. He jumped up and greeted both of them in his usual exuberant fashion.

"Didi is a good fellow to have around," said Bruce. "You can let him in the house, he won't break anything and he'll do his business outside. He is very smart too. I got the little bugger pissed once. He didn't like it and since then he stops when he reckons he's had enough."

"I've noticed that. He does like his beer though."

"What else did you think? He's an Aussie, isn't he?" Bruce laughed.

"There is that," I had to admit.

"Anyway, time to go to the pub. I wonder what the girls have cooked for tonight." Bruce seemed to enjoy someone else cooking for once.

Didi hopped off the table and disappeared up a tree when we rose. We walked for a change. It was pleasant.

This time the girls had set up a buffet rather than serving food at the table. Mexican night. Tacos, chilli con carne, enchiladas, nachos, tortillas; that sort of thing. Colourful jugs with sangria stood on the table. It met with approval.

After the meal Betty asked us into the conference room. She was in her lecturing mode, she had even set up a lectern. Her only departure from tradition was the ice bucket with the champagne and a flute glass instead of the usual pitcher with water.

Always the gentleman, Bruce got up, popped the cork and filled her glass. He then made the rounds and hexed everybody whatever drink they wanted. Once everyone was settled Betty started her lecture.

"Tomorrow we have guests from an alien culture. Setting aside the differences in skin and hair colour and the shape of their ears they look and function pretty much like us. There are some major differences you need to know about if we are to get along in harmony.

"These people live a simple life. That does not make them primitives, far from it. It is their choice. Violence and greed are unknown to them. Panacea tells me the Ancients viewed violence and greed as diseases, a leftover from more primitive beginnings, and had developed a cure for it. It is highly probable they had treated these people a long time back and eradicated these diseases from their planet.

"As a result their society developed in ways that are unknown in our world. There is no competition amongst these people. Everyone just does the best they can to contribute to the tribe. Tribe is defined as whoever is there at the time. This is important. This means that whoever is with them has the same obligations and privileges as everyone else.

"I have told their elders that we did not know the ways of their tribe and were likely to offend at some time or other. They just laughed and said that their children did not know their ways either and had to be taught. They will tell us when we are out of line. As long as we understand that their ways are sacred to them and try the best we can there shouldn't be a problem. All this will sort itself out in time.