A Hope for Rauri Ch. 04

They stood blinking in the bright light of a sunny day at around noon -- which surprised them both.

"When you walk in the mounds of the faerie," Cliodnha smiled, "time becomes a thing most fluid and very elusive to most people who are much used to living outside of one."

"My father used to tell me stories when I was just a little girl," Shauna said, "I remember him saying to me that if a mortal goes inside of a mound -- or even breaks a fairy ring as they dance -- you can end up far from where you were in time, if you ever come out at all."

Cliodnha nodded, as though seeing Shauna with slightly different eyes suddenly, "Then your father told you truly. I see a touch of the Sidhe in you, Shauna, a relation far back, I think."

Shauna shrugged, "It's a bit of a family mystery. There was supposed to be a faerie maiden once who married a man in my family, but I've never been able to find out who or how far back."

"Such a thing is exceedingly rare," Cliodnha said with a small smile, "Most often, it is the men who ache to be allowed to live with the maidens which they might meet. One of the Sidhe most often have few reasons to want to leave and go to live in the mortal world -- since the price for it is high to them most times.

But we were speaking of time.

As the sorts of creatures which we are -- we three as we stand here, even though we are different, we are not as affected by what Shauna's father told her. Time has appeared to have passed, and it has, but not from the same reason. In this case, we have walked only a quarter of an hour and yet we are a long way indeed from Loudon Hill."

"What do you mean the creatures that we are?" Shauna asked and Cliodnha laughed softly.

"I do not know if it goes in both directions for you, Shauna, but from the first moment that I saw Wesley and then from when I met you, I have seen you both as you also are -- a pair of what some refer to as werewolves.

I see that all of the time, or most of the time, anyway; a very beautiful she-wolf and a handsome male, both wearing the ill-fitting human clothing which looks fine when they are viewed by humans."

She gestured toward the horizon with a wave of her hand, "Where we stand now, we are in the middle of what is today known by many humans as the southern uplands of Scotland.

Do you see that range over there? The group of hills which lies there, looking for all the world as the fingers of a hand if you think on it for a moment?"

She waited then as first Shauna and then Wesley saw the reference and nodded.

"Together, those hills are what is known as the Awful Hand. It can be a terrible thing to have to walk across the breadth of it -- especially in wintertime.

That is where my hall is and that is also the home of my most troubled subject -- the Bean Sith of the Awful Hand, as she is coming to be known to the few people who live anywhere even close by. Few do these days, though most have heard her as she begins her travels to where someone lies dying."

She smiled a little, "At least I can take a little comfort in the knowledge that her passing by here as she goes will not rouse very many of the neighbors as they try to sleep."

She led them back inside then before standing with a bit of a thoughtful look for a moment.

"Rauri needs two things above all," she said, "before I can begin to tell myself that this long and sad time is passing. Most and soonest of them, she needs a friend. And second, she will then need someone to love her."

She saw that neither of them had put it together yet, so she went on, "And both of those will need to be able to show her a very deep ability to be understanding, for she has had other things to weep over of late."

They began to walk once more and Cliodnha turned to Shauna for a moment. "I would like for you to understand something. I know very well the ways in which a female heart works, having one myself.

What I want you to try very hard to understand is that I hold nothing against you in any way. I can say that at first, your arrival here caused me some concern, but I have since learned more of you and I wish that we might come to a sense of friendliness between us -- especially now that I see that you are even more than you appear to one with my eyes.

A were she-wolf and such a startlingly lovely one -- AND carrying Fae blood ..."

She snorted quietly and grinned, "I cannot think that it could be a bad thing, dear Shauna, but if I had been asked as to the possibility of it, I'd have laughed and said no. It is more than your charm which draws me to you, friend.

I have something to say to you as my advice and I find that it is as slightly daunting as the want to cut a tea rose from it's bush with only a blade and no gloves. Can you see my meaning?"

Shauna looked over and she nodded carefully, "Go on, Cliodnha. I'm listening."

The queen took a breath and let it out. "I know that you have lain with the Cu Sith. I would not care much, other than I like you and so I hope that it was very good for you together."

"Can you tell me anything about him?" Shauna asked, "He seemed a little, ... mysterious to me somehow. I had a good time, but there was something, ... I dunno, it's hard to pin down. I couldn't tell if he was just having trouble communicating, or whether he was hiding something about himself."

Cliodnha frowned, "I cannot say much because I do not know him well. He has only been with me for less than a year and he keeps to himself much of the time. I think that out of what he is, he leads a lonely life.

I must tell you that while he lives in my hall, aside from day-to-day things, he is not under my command completely since I am not his liege. He and his kind belong to another."

"But," Wesley began, "You're the queen, aren't you?"

She nodded, "A queen I am, yes and I am queen in my hall and it's surroundings. But I am queen over only some, and not all of the Sith. There is another who holds them all and me besides.

I am as a lord to those not of my kind. She is my lord, and she is the one who holds Shauna's lover to account in other matters, not I."

She turned to Shauna then, "I need to say to you that, knowing this -- what I have just said to you both -- I want for you to have a care over your heart with that one. I do not say it to try to drive anything between you. Remember that for the little that I know of him I like him as well.

Just be a little watchful as you can, Shauna."

She looked to be feeling a little frustrated over having to choose her words for a moment, "He may act as his heart drives him to act -- and that is to the good for my part if his heart is true.

But, ... he may also act as his queen commands. That is what I mean to say."

"But, why would his queen care?" Shauna asked and it seemed to cause Cliodnha even more trouble.

"Remember one thing always," she said, "Are all humans good in your view?"

Wesley and Shauna looked at each other and shook their heads.

"Then why," the queen asked, "do others, humans mostly, always seem to want to think and believe that the Aos Sí must always be good? Just like humans, many of us are not. Most of us are if we feel as though we wish to be. I saved Rauri, but I might not have if I'd seen her only the previous week or the one after.

I wish to believe, lovely Shauna, that if you do not hold the Cù Sìth of my hall by the heart now, then you surely cannot stand far from it, by what was told to me and by what I saw in him.

I quite liked to see him that way.

But if his queen ordered it, then it is also my belief that he would do as he must, and the hold that you might have on his large heart would not protect you if it is there. All that I say -- and likely very badly - is to keep your wits about you for the next little time -- certainly this day. Can you do this?"

Shauna looked over and her expression showed that she didn't know what to think.

"I think I get it," Wes said quietly as he put his hand on Shauna's shoulder, "What she's trying to tell you is that for today, for some reason, it would probably be best for you not to lead with your heart."

"Oh, thank you, Wesley," Cliodnha smiled, nodding in a bit of relief, "Americans always seem to have the way to say things clearly. I know that you were born an Englishman, but to my eyes, you have taken the mannerisms of the Americans and wear them like a warm cloak."

Shauna nodded and said that she got it, but deep down, she didn't really trust Cliodnha either.

Cliodnha sensed it and spoke again in a very low tone, "I cannot say it in another way. While you are in my hall, Shauna, you are safe.

Do not, for any reason, leave there unless it is with me as I bring you both back to Loudon Hill. Do not leave with him, no matter where he says that you are to go. Stay in my hall.

Even if you go with him to a quiet chamber if you wish to be alone with him, I have many chambers for that. It is not something to leave over.

So do not leave my hall unless you are in my company, for to set foot out of it, ... I cannot keep you safe otherwise -- and it is what I wish to do for you."

"I think I understand -- at least some of that," Shauna nodded, "but can you give me at least a clue about what the danger is, from what I see just looking at you here?"

Cliodnha said nothing for a moment. She looked around and backed up into a little alcove of stone and silently beckoned them to come to her. When they did, she held up her hand for them to wait as the motions of her other hand caused the stone of the place to grow around them, creating a very small space which they now stood in, and she caused a small flare of light to hang above them all.

Even so, she beckoned them to lean closer to her and she began to whisper.

"Did he say what his duties are?"

Shauna whispered her reply, "Yes. He told me that he foretells of a coming death, just like a banshee, and he also said that he can take women away with him if they're not hidden and locked up in time."

"One of the Coin Sith can take them even if they WERE hidden and locked away," Cliodnha whispered, "They go of their own will and if they cannot get free to go with him, they go mad. Did he say where he takes them and why?"

Shauna shook her head, "No, he just said that I'm not in danger."

The queen nodded, "From him, acting alone, you are not, perhaps -- unless he is commanded otherwise by his queen.

At one time, and it still happens now and then, there are suddenly more Aos Sí babes than there are breasts to feed them from. When that becomes known, his queen sends him and others out.

The women who are brought back are milked then to feed the many little mouths. None of them take much, but there are many then."

Shauna blinked, "But I'm not nursing. I've never given birth."

"No," Cliodnha agreed, "but you can be made to -- just as any grown female can. Birthing a babe is not needed.

In time, I have seen that most of those women are happy, and I do not understand it or care to, really, but many of them are taken by the Fae as lovers and live very happy lives, making their own little ones with them.

But it was never a choice which they were given and they can never leave. Remember that, and remember this as well.

All of those women were brought by one of the Coin Sith as commanded.

Lest you mistake my words, I have never commanded such a thing. Whenever births happen in my hall, there is always enough milk for those little ones in the breasts of their mothers, since my hall is in a lonely place and there are not as many there.

Say nothing of what I have said to anyone, Shauna. Only remember it if anyone tries to lead you away from the hall without me there; not only your Cu Sith lover, anyone, for they may be acting on commands from another."

She turned to Wes then, "And for you, I have other words of care and caution, but I will not need to make a hiding place to tell of them."

She moved her hands in a curious manner, and the rock wall around them receded. Cliodnha turned and led them on.

"There is a type of Sith out of the ones which I command which is not seen much -- even hereabouts anymore," she said.

"As a matter of fact, I have but one of them in my hall at present. Before her, there has not been one in over a hundred years, closer indeed to a hundred and fifty in the way that men see the passing of time.

I do have two in Eire though. As far as I know, one lives with a writer of books and the other stays near to Ulster and sometimes travels to Dublin, for she loves the life of the musicians there. They are Leannan Sìth, both of them, rather dangerous more to men than women, but sometimes, they take a woman instead if they cannot find a man which suits their, ... tastes, I suppose.

They are exceedingly lovely to look at and most any man can fall under their bewitchment quite easily. Only the writer knows of his peril and his lovely muse loves him dearly -- well, for as long as it lasts, which is to say, as long as he does.

Leannan Sìth are exceedingly hungry for the love and the life of the one which they choose. They drain the second by building the first into a towering need.

The writer knows of his peril, but he is already powerless to stop things and tries as he can to limit their time together. She in turn does exactly the opposite and I know that he will pass within the next three moons."

"From what?" Shauna asked, "Or maybe I ought to say, what will he die of?"

Cliodnha looked over and offered a slight shrug, "She will drain his life away, for that is what they need, the Leannan Sìth.

He must be good for her. They have been together now for past a year and a half. Leannan Sìth are very hungry things and they tend to be restless and will always look to seek out new lovers. If this desire comes to her, that man will not last even as long as I give him.

The other loves the ... I think that you call it the scene, the night life of her prey. The ones that she hungers for tend to live hard and short lives anyway, so she has found a good pasture to forage in. Many musicians in this day live short lives. You have likely heard of many like that. While it might be good for sales of their music after their passing, it is not always the drink or the drugs which take them. Once my Leannan Sìth have stolen almost all of their lives away, there is often not enough left to live with for very long.

They drain the lives of the men away, though they give much in the way of inspiration. The result is a somewhat short, though brilliant career. To know one is to have an incredible love, though my subjects will always leave at some point as they find less and less life to steal away in their need.

Once they are gone, the man pines for a short time and passes, with nothing left in him to go on for long -- no reason to get up out of his bed and nothing to try for without his muse for they are weak and empty by then.

Some manage to escape for a time, trying to wean themselves away if they are bright enough to see what is happening to them. But it is usually only for a time, for the echoes of their love with her are very loud in what is left of their souls and those ones usually seek out the forgetfulness and short comfort which men can find in a bottle. For those few, the bottle takes them at last.

The one in my hall has not been seen for a short time, as she stays near to the university in Edinburgh, going from one man to the next very quickly. She knows the result of what she does, so she does not stay very long at all with any one man. There are plenty there for her to play with and I believe that she does it that way to try to spare them, leaving as she does before she has had much of a chance to do much harm."

She looked over at Wesley, "I understand that you saw Rauri last night.

Tell me, Wesley, did she look any different to the memory that you can recall? Was there anything different about her?"

He thought about it for a moment, "I can't say to be honest. She looked as I remembered her. What sort of thing, ..."

"She has always looked beautiful," Cliodnha said, "I ask wanting to know if to your eyes, she was even more so, ... or is that an unfair question?

I think that to lay one's eye on someone who has been in one's heart even in a small way for so many years, ... perhaps it would all seem the same as far as how she looked then.

My Bean Sith -- well, the one which concerns us at present, seems to be shifting toward the way of the Leannan Sìth by what I feel, though she has not acted in that way as yet to my knowledge.

It is a concern to me and a possible peril to you, Wesley. More, I hold a fear that she might go right past that sort of life. As what she was, a human, now one of us, she can shift and not remain as only one kind. I knew this at the outset long ago, but I did not think that it was a danger, since I did not think that she would go this long and not get better from her grief.

I think that her grief might be ending, but I worry for her. If she goes past being Leannan Sìth, there can be only one end for her and that is to become Baobhan Sith, much closer to being a dead thing than a living one.

Such things exist elsewhere and your cinema even makes them popular, the ones from other cultures. You call them vampires.

Baobhan Sith do not have the teeth, ... well, they do, I would say, but they use their claws to tear open the neck so that they might feed. They do not create others like themselves that way and once sated, go to their graves for a time until the hunger begins again.

This fate, more than anything, is what I seek to save Rauri from now, for in some ways, it is already beginning.

Baobhan Sith have cloven hooves for feet and she already has them sometimes. She is horrified and wails for herself all over again, thinking that her cruel fate will not let her be. She had the thought that it was something that I did.

But I did not.

She saw you last night and though you might not have been trying to cause it in her, she felt hope for herself for a short time. But then, she thought of her feet and left you."

She motioned toward the wall of the passage and a space appeared, looking something like a mirror. As they looked, the silvery sheen began to fade and they could look deeper.

Inside, they saw the banshee sitting on her bed and looking at the floor with a hopeless expression which seemed to be not far from the point of tears. She wore nothing and both Shauna and Wesley gasped quietly. "She's so ... beautiful," Shauna whispered.

"To her mind," the queen remarked sadly, "it is but another part of her curse."

They watched the girl slowly get to her feet and turn toward the door. Her legs shifted then and they heard the heavy clump as her legs changed and grew fur and hooves. The one in the scene knew of the change and could be seen forcing back the way that she felt to try instead to walk just a little uncertainly.

When she reached the door, she stopped and became as she was again, though clearly it was out of her force of will. After that, she opened the door and walked out, bending to take up a bucket.

They watched her carry the bucket along to a steaming spring where she filled it and walked on.

"What's with the bucket?" Shauna asked, "And that cloth hanging over the side?"

Cliodnha looked down and said nothing for a moment as she shook her head. "All of this starts to make me feel far worse. She goes to a place which I made for her in a grotto. No one but Rauri ever goes there. She was against it at first, but I told her that she needed something to ease at least some part of the yearning which all females know.

She goes to a single stone there a little high up." Cliodnha raised her hand to close off the view, but Shauna reached for her hand, "Wait. Please?"