A Joke - Another Version

"I didn't realize his jokes were getting to you Jim. Is there anything I can tell Flo that might give her some hope that you will forgive her?"

Of course I knew I still loved Flo and wanted her back so how could I be saying what I was. "You are kidding aren't you? Forgive her for what she did? Maybe if she can prove to me that she didn't have sex with Roger, I'll consider it and I'm definitely not taking Roger's word or hers that nothing happened and it was just a tasteless joke. As far as I am concerned it really happened. If I had any inkling that it was just a joke and they weren't really fucking I certainly wouldn't have done this to my wrists would I?"

"You honestly believed they were fucking then?"

"Alice, I told you; I heard everything. I even heard them cumming. I honestly believed they fucked as much as I believe you are sitting in front of me now."

"Jim, I'm so sorry that they did that to you. I'll tell her and you know I'll miss you and our long conversations."

"I'll miss you too Alice. Now let me load her stuff in your car and you can take it to her. Maybe I just should just have thrown her stuff over the fence but I didn't know if she was still at your place or has she moved to her sisters already."

"She's moving over to her sister's place this afternoon after I get her gear. You will be pleased to know that Roger was too scared to come home last night in case you were waiting for him with a baseball bat or something. Jim, I stayed up next her all last night in case she did something silly and harmed herself as she was really distressed. She spent all night crying and looking out the window at your house. We thought you were home in bed and didn't know you were admitted to hospital. I didn't tell you, but sometime after midnight when I realized Flo wasn't about to go to sleep we finally came over and tried to get in to make sure you were all right, but the doors were all bolted from the inside. It made Flo worse when she saw all the blood at the front door and on the ground on the way over and back. I wondered why you didn't hear her crying; I'm sure all the neighbours heard her. Jim, we should have been up at the hospital with you."

"Alice, I was angry and they had totally destroyed my pride and self- worth. I wanted to be alone and completely away from her. Alice, I still cannot even begin comprehend how they could have done that to me, even if it was just a bad joke," I answered.

"Well, let me tell you that Flo is completely devastated because of what she has done to you. The combination of finding you bleeding and whatever you said to her in the basement then finding out publicly at church that you refused to allow the hospital to contact her when they admitted you has had a terrible impact on her."

As we loaded the bags of Flo's gear in Alice's car I told her that I would try to stop the police charging them so long as she didn't tell Roger or Flo I was stopping them. I told her I wanted them to think the investigation was ongoing. She looked at me for a moment then told me they were hurting enough but promised to say nothing. Her husband had lost his best friend and Flo looked like losing me. She said that I needed to be careful I didn't turn out as bad as them. I waved as she left my driveway then turned into hers then I went back in the house and thought seriously about what she had said. It was true and now I had to make sure I didn't. I was sure I saw Flo standing at a window watching me.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

That evening about 7:30 I was watching TV when the door-bell rang. Looking out the window I saw Flo's sister, Mary, standing at the front door. Her sister lived on the other side of town. Mary was a widow and lived alone so there would be room for Flo, probably indefinitely if needed. If Flo hadn't somewhere safe to go it didn't matter how angry I was, I knew I would have let her stay at our house and I would have left.

"Hi Mary." was my greeting as I opened the door to let her in.

"Hello Jim. Can I take a few minutes of your time?"

"Sure Mary, I don't have an argument with you. Come in."

We went into the living room and she sat down and I sat in a chair across from her and I asked if she'd like something to drink.

"A Coke would be nice."

I got her one and one for myself and returned to the living room.

"I suppose you know what this is about." she said after taking a sip of her drink.

"Sure. Are you going to be asking me to take her back? If you are, you've made a trip for nothing and you may as well leave." My angry demons were back.

"Well, I won't ask that then will I? Jim, she told me all about what they did. How are your wrists?"

"They're scabbing over now a bit now and should be OK I hope. I don't see any sign of infection. And all going well, the stitches will come out in out the end of the week I'm told. They still hurt like hell and the bruising is coming out now as well. They look terrible, in fact worse now if anything."

"Flo will be glad to hear they're healing. She's just about ready for a nervous breakdown you know; especially since you won't talk to her and refuse to let her come home. That's why I'm here; to carry a message. Rather, more than one message."

"I'll listen to your messages but I don't promise anything in return."

"The first is that she loves you very much and is so very sorry for what she did."

"OK, I heard all that on my phone messages before I deleted them. Anything else? "I answered coldly.

Mary looked a little deflated when I said that but responded, "She wants you to know that she is willing to do anything; absolutely anything at all Jim to prove to you that nothing happened between her and Roger. Jim, she is desperate. She is hurting and she loves you so much. I am starting to worry about her health."

"Mary, ask her if she loved me so much why did it to me; why did she want to hurt me so much. Mary, ask her why she didn't stop the whole thing when I pleaded with her not to go with him. Mary, she just turned to look at me and smiled, then went off with him holding each other. That destroyed me. How can she prove that nothing happened? I know what I heard and they can't disprove they didn't do it for real. I could hear them like they were right next to me and I could see them fucking in my mind as they were doing it. I know he's been lusting after her for ages and now he has fucked her. To me it sounded like they were really fucking and she enjoyed every minute of it; I heard her moaning and cumming. Tell me how can she say I didn't hear what I heard? Mary, I have spent hours thinking about this. I even thought she could get a rape kit and get tested to see if she had his cum in her but it too late for that now. Maybe if I had thought of it when it happened I might have believed her."

"Oh Jim, I'm so sorry to hear she did that to you. I didn't know that happened. You honestly believe she did fuck him, don't you?"

"Mary, I told you. I know what I heard. I desperately want her to prove to me she didn't but it's too late now and maybe too late for us. And how can I forgive her for setting me up like that, then cuckolding me? Mary, I loved her so much and I had always planned to spend the rest of my life with her, but after what she did to me, I don't know. It doesn't look all that hopeful to me anymore. They did it knowing I could hear everything and they handcuffed me to a pipe so I couldn't stop them doing it. She deliberately cuckolded me!"

"Jim, can't you just trust her and forgive her stupidity in being involved in such a hurtful joke?"

"I'm sorry Mary; it certainly wasn't a joke to me. I can't believe or trust her until she can prove that she and Roger didn't fuck. But trusting her again will take a long time."

"I'm so sorry, Jim. I don't know how they can prove that now. Can I get back to you if I can think of something please? And Jim, she has heard from my friend that you have been to see your lawyers about divorcing her. She has been hysterical all afternoon since then. I'm only here because she finally cried herself to sleep. You will totally destroy her and yourself if you go ahead with that. I have seen you too together; you were meant for each other. Please wait? Please give me a few days before you have her served?"

"Ok Mary, I'll wait till I hear from you. Is that all you wanted to say? And don't forget to ask her those questions."

"Thank-you for seeing me, Jim. I promise I will get back to you this week. Bye." And she left.

Sergeant Bell came around the next afternoon as promised after he had collected the three statements about the event; he had recorded the visits as he said he would. Initially I thought I would enjoy hearing them suffer but strangely I kept hearing Alice's words of warning in my head. I listened to Roger's shaking voice and how he sounded close to tears. Flo was hysterical and it was only the intervention of Mary giving her a very strong sedative she had kept since her husband's tragic and sudden death that she eventually calmed down and gave her statement. Alice stayed true to her word and had not told either of them. I didn't enjoy what I had just done to three people I used to love and I think Sgt Bell knew how I was feeling. I read their statements as he told me theirs supported mine apart from their not having sex in the room above my head. I thanked him for his efforts and he made me promise to think about how lonely life can be without the one you love. I should have been happy about what I had done to them but realized I was starting to feel quite the opposite.

I knew I would hear from Alice again very soon after what I had heard and I wasn't wrong. I was in the yard when Alice came home from work and parked in her driveway and walked over to me. She was crying and her makeup looked a mess and as she approached I went to greet her and gave her my handkerchief for her tears. I took her hand and led her to the patio and sat her down while I went for some cold drinks.

When I returned she turned to me and said, "Jim, the policeman came and took our statements. He had already seen Flo and taken hers. I phoned Mary afterwards and she told me Flo was so scared when the police showed up at her door. They never thought it could get so out of hand like it has. I know you hate Roger now for what he has done but he was scared shitless by the police visit. He has never even had so much as a parking ticket and now there is this mess. The policeman took photos of where you were handcuffed and he made Roger show him how you were held captive. He bagged the handcuffs and showed us the photos of your wrists before you were cleaned up. They both had told me they hadn't thought you would react like you did and never expected this result. Jim, it stopped being funny to them when they saw your wrists that night."

"Mary, it should have stopped being funny when she heard me pleading for her not to go with him. They both heard my pleading but they kept going. So am I now."

"I'm sorry Jim, I didn't realize you were losing so much blood and would never have let you leave if I had. Poor Roger was shaking the whole time and I doubt he will ever play another practical joke, particularly after he was told that if charges are laid he will need a good lawyer as jail time could be involved if he was found guilty. You can still stop any charges can't you Jim? Please? Jail would destroy Roger......." I interrupted her and coldly said, "Like he has destroyed me Alice? Destroyed my marriage and destroyed my life? That seems fair." Alice looked shocked, then continued, "Jim, please don't do this to us; to me." Alice burst into tears again as she continued. "Jim, please, I have no one else, no family, no-one. Roger is all I have. And you and Flo were my closest friends. You were like my family. Jim, I would be prepared to make it even if that is what it would take. Jim, please make love to me if it will make you feel better about what happened."

I moved over to her and held her as she continued to cry. Now I knew that my good friend was already collateral damage.

Poor Alice must have been desperate and I certainly hadn't expected her to offer herself to me to make things even and as much as she was one very hot lady, I only loved my wife. My pay back had gone too far. It would be hypercritical of me to fuck Alice after all I had said about being faithful. I thanked her and told her I wouldn't be filing charges so long as she continued to say nothing to them then she leaned over and hugged me as she started crying again for what seemed like was ages. Alice eventually stopped crying and looked up at me and asked, "What about Flo? Have you spoken to her yet? Jim, please forgive her. Mary told me she has not been eating and has lost weight. She just sits staring at nothing and cries all the time."

All I could say was, "Alice, I want to forgive her. I want to love her again but I can still hear her cumming with Roger up in your bedroom. I want to have her back but I still need proof they didn't fuck. Any proof would help."

"Oh Jim, what have I done? I just realized I was so angry at them and what they did or didn't do on our bed that I stripped the bed and washed the sheets. I couldn't stand the thought of laying on them after what they had done. Honest Jim, I didn't see any evidence of them fucking but I could see that they had been on the bed though and that fits in with their stories. We could have had them tested. Oh, if only I had been thinking. Jim, I'm sorry. Now I don't know how you are going to get your proof. You know I was serious about making it even and being with you to help you forgive them. If you change your mind about my offer so you can take her back please call me." And then she kissed me on the cheek and walked home.

Two nights later I was turning off the lights and about to head back to my lonely empty bed when I heard Mary's car scream into the driveway. It wasn't late but whatever she wanted must have been important and I prayed Flo was alright as I opened the door to her. Mary jumped from her car and raced up the path to me at the door. I was worried and about to ask her if Flo was ok when she started talking at a million miles an hour. I pulled her inside trying to calm her and sat her at the kitchen table. I handed her a bottle of Coke to try to slow her down.

Her eyes were excited and she took a deep breath that started again. "Jim, we were just watching NCIS on TV. Jim, they used a lie detector! Jim, a lie detector can give you the answers you need and you can have your Flo back. What do you think? Please Jim, you owe it to yourself. You owe it to both of you. Please, Jim, please?"

I sat there thinking about what she was saying and maybe this was the only proof I could get and just nodded my head.

"She wants you to know that she is willing to take a lie detector test to prove that she isn't lying when she says nothing happened with Roger or ever has with him or anyone else. That is the only proof she can offer you apart from her word."

This was a new direction I hadn't thought of and I gave it a few more minutes thought as Mary watched me intently while continuing to sip her Coke.

"That sounds OK to me but I want to place some conditions on it. One, results proving she didn't have sex with Roger doesn't mean I will take her back. Two, Roger will have to take the same test and the results of his test will have to agree with hers. Three, I want approval on who administers the tests and the questions and four, I will not pay for the tests."

"That sounds reasonable to me Jim, but can't you be more positive about taking her back if the test results show they aren't lying?"

"No, she cuckolded me and hurt me deeply and even if I took her back it will be a long time before I forgive her."

"Alright, Jim. I'll give her your conditions. I'm really sorry about this whole mess. I wanted to tear into her for her stupidity when she showed up at my place, but she was such a pathetic sight that I don't believe anything I could say would make her feel any worse. She knows that she has done a very stupid thing and has also done you a terrible wrong particularly after I told her what you said on my last visit. I have to give her pills to get her to sleep at night now. I also want to tell you that she called your kids and told them what she did. I think they were a little put out at her as she hasn't stopped crying since she talked with them. Well, I'd better get back and give your message. Thanks for the Coke."

"OK Mary. Thanks for coming all the way over here. I appreciate your concern."

After she left I sat down to think about the situation. Some of my initial ire had cooled and I was now able to think clearer about what I wanted. I decided to get a drink first and went into the den, where my liquor cabinet was, and poured a tumbler half full with good scotch and then went to the kitchen to add an ice cube. Without returning to my seat I wandered about the house looking at all the things that were memories of our married life together. Did I really want to end my marriage remembering what Sgt Bell had told me about his loneliness? I was awakened from my reverie and reminiscing by the door bell ringing. Checking out the window I saw our daughter, Patty, standing at the front door looking decidedly unhappy.

"Oh shit," I thought. She's just found the locks have been changed and her key didn't work. I opened the door and Patty immediately came inside giving me a dirty look.

"What's with changing the locks dad and why aren't you answering your phone. It's late and I have been trying all week and had to drive here 150 miles to find out what's going on."

"I'm sorry Patty; I didn't want to talk with your mother so it turned the phone down. I hear from your Aunt Mary that she told you what she did."

"Yes, and I'm really mad at you for throwing her out just because of a joke. Can't you forgive her and let her come home? When she called me to let me know what she did she was a basket case.

"Patty, it was more than just a joke and I'd warned her before that I didn't like the way she and our friend Roger were carrying on, but she didn't listen."

"I couldn't get too much out of mom over the phone but I understand it was just a joke. What was so bad about it?"

I wondered how much Flo had told her but went on to relate what had happened from my point of view. I started out by telling her about the necking incident they had pulled earlier and our discussions afterward. Then I told her about their so called fucking joke and pulled up my sleeves and removed the bandages to show her my wrists.

"Oh daddy, that's terrible. Was that when you threw her out?"

"Yes, I was sure they had intercourse. It sure sounded like they did, because I know the sounds your mother makes when she has an orgasm. Patty, I heard everything, even her moaning. Either that or they're very good actors. I perceive that they did and that's my reality until she can prove differently."

"Your mother has offered to take a lie detector test and to have Roger take one. If the test results agree I'll have to believe her, but she hurt me so badly. They thought they would have a big laugh at my expense and accept being a pseudo wimp, cuckold over their so-called joke. I still worry I may be unable to live with her again."

"I'm real sorry that daddy. I hope you and mom can work this out because I love you both in spite of what she did."

"I'm trying to accomplish that baby because I really miss your mother, but I still can't get over her disrespect for me."

"OK daddy, I guess I can't ask more than you try to get back with her. I'm going over to see mom now that I know what happened and see if I can get her calmed down. I'll probably spend the night at Aunt Mary's and then I have to get back. Please answer your phones so I can get a hold of you and I know Eric wants to talk with you too. I'll call him and let him know what this is all about. He's on that job upstate and has been trying to reach you after mom called him."