A Shepherd Afield Pt. 04

"Don't think you can ever come back if you leave!" Margaux yelled angrily but her voice wobbled as her emotions began to go off the rails.

Ben reached the door and turned as he opened it. Margaux was crying but her face still showed her rage. "GET OUT!" she screamed.

Bobby exited the bedroom behind her with his and his wife's clothes under his arm. His expression showed his worry as he slipped around Margaux and grabbed his wife's hand. They rushed to follow Ben out into the hall as Margaux exploded with rage.

Something shattered against the other side of the closed door. The screaming went on as Ben leaned against the wall, his stomach threatening to climb out of his body. Bobby and Tasha were quickly dressing in the hallway as they looked at each other in shock.

Ben forced his stomach back down and pushed himself from the wall to make his way stiffly to the elevator. Halfway there he felt a gentle touch on his arm and stopped. Tasha moved in front of him with tears in her eyes.

"I'm so sorry! We had no idea," she moaned with a trembling bottom lip.

Bobby came up beside her. "Yeah, she met us in the coffee house this morning. She was all smiles and asked if we'd like to come back to her place for some fun. She was pretty wild-" He stopped when his wife placed her hand on his chest.

"We had no idea she was just using us to hurt you! We're so sorry," she apologized again.

"Were you having sex with another chick last night?" Bobby asked hesitantly.

"Bobby! Oh my god!" Tasha shrieked.

"No... no, I wasn't," Ben said and moved around them to keep walking to the elevator.

They waited together in silence and got in the elevator when it arrived. On the way down Tasha began to cry and Ben's nerves frayed beyond his ability to cope with it.

"Please! Please, don't..." he forced out.

When the doors opened he rushed out and left the building. He was momentarily lost. He didn't know which direction to go. He finally turned left and walked towards the harbour.

Ben walked, pulling his suitcase behind him, and lost track of the number of blocks he went until he faced the water's edge. He looked out at the water and his heart yearned for home. It was almost unbearable.

He flagged down a cab and climbed in the back with his luggage. He gave the driver the address for Gretchen's place as he had nowhere else to go.

When he arrived he saw the older gentleman at the security desk who frowned when he saw Ben's face.

"Is everything alright, sir," the man asked with concern. Ben shook his head and walked past to the elevators. He went up and knocked on Gretchen's door. The peephole went dark then he heard a squeak on the other side as the lock flipped open. Gretchen yanked the door open and her wide smile froze when she saw the pain in Ben's eyes. She instantly reached out to touch his chest gently in concern and he struggled to contain his emotions. He gave her a weak smile and entered the condo. He put his bags down next to the front closet.

"Who was it?"

The voice belonged to a short, slim, older red haired woman with thin gold rimmed glasses who was coming out of the office. "Oh! Hello! You must... be... Mr. Shepherd. What happened?"

Ben couldn't talk about it. He was still feeling too raw and his emotions were flaring badly. He just smiled and shook his head. "Margaret Dawson?" The woman nodded. "Call me Ben... did- did you find everything you needed," he forced out as he roughly wiped away an errant tear that escaped.

Margaret blinked at the sight of the big man struggling with his emotions. Her instincts were screaming at her that he was hurting but this was a very large grown man so she reigned in her need to comfort him and just answered his question.

"Yes, Rainor was a very thorough and meticulous record keeper. His investments are well documented and I was able to find his lawyer. I know the chief partner at the firm and gave him a call. Rainor did not have a will but he and Gretchen are German citizens and his chief accounts are held within German banks. Being his only heir Gretchen stands to inherit Rainor's entire estate and the man had some serious income. He also has a large safe deposit box in a German bank but I found no information on what he keeps in it."

"Will Gretchen be able to travel with me tomorrow night?" Ben asked.

"As long as I have a means to contact her I'm ok with it. The police detective who was here earlier indicated to me that he had no further questions for her. Rainor's death was ruled as accidental," the lawyer indicated.

"Thank you very much." He turned to Gretchen. "I need your passport." The woman rushed away and returned from the study with it. She handed it to Ben and looked up at him. "Would you mind if I borrowed the bed to lie down for a few hours?" Ben asked stiffly. She shook her head then gestured towards the bedroom. He gave her a brittle smile, grabbed his luggage, and headed that way. He stopped before he reached the door. "Could... could you point me to where I might find fresh sheets?" His voice sounded a little raw.

The two women exchanged concerned looks.

"There are fresh sheets on the bed now," Gretchen answered.

"Thank you."

Ben went into the bedroom and closed the door. He took off his clothes and took a shower. After he dried himself he pulled on some fresh boxers and walked back into the bedroom. He had one more task to do before he would let himself sleep. He took his laptop from the case, flipped it open and logged into the airline website. He pulled up the flight and saw there were four available first class seats. He booked two seats next to each other and entered their details. Then he cancelled his original seat. He shut down then packed the laptop away and slipped under the sheets.

He closed his eyes and tried to get Margaux's screams out of his head. Eventually exhaustion pulled him under.

Chapter 33

Catherine stood in the small living room of Chanel's apartment in Paris looking around. She loved the way Chanel and Isabelle had decorated the space. My god, it was small!

Her lover was right about something else. The building this tiny apartment was in would not have attracted a second look. An old factory conversion, it kept its blunt and forbidding brick exterior and poorly divided its interior for maximum occupancy and minimal livability. Soundproofing was minimal as well as Catherine could hear a man crying nearby.

Chanel moved back into the living room from the bedroom with a large duffle bag full of clothes. She smiled at the blond and saw the look on her face.

"Oh, that's Martine. He cries for the lost opportunities of his youth. He's also a lecherous old man who will try to touch you intimately if you get too close so avoid him. I've had to punish him twice. He avoids me now," the brunette explained.

Catherine nodded with wide eyes. She turned her attention to the knickknacks and other items around the room. For its small size the apartment didn't feel cluttered. If anything there were remarkably few items to represent the life the two women had in this place.

Once more Chanel interpreted Catherine's curious look. "When Isabelle was taken from me I had to reduce the number of reminders so I purged the apartment at that time. What was left were items that caused the least pain. Now none of them do but neither do they remind me of the good times. I'm not taking any of them. I'm almost done." She went back into the bedroom and Catherine heard a filing cabinet open.

Cat walked around the room and poked into the little cubbyhole storage unit built into one wall. It was filled with little household items, candles, matches, napkins, a corkscrew, a pair of scissors and such. In one of the upper cubbies she found a small velvet box. It was covered in dust and looked very old as the velvet was worn in spots. She opened the box and gasped. Inside was a beautiful broach. It was a ribbon made of silver or white gold covered in what looked like diamonds! It wasn't large but it was heartbreakingly lovely. Catherine thought it would look beautiful on Chanel. A tiny piece of paper once stuck to the bottom of the box with some dried up tape fluttered to the floor. She bent down and picked it up. The tiny writing on the paper made her gasp. 'To my love, Chanel, From Isabelle.'

Tears welled up in her eyes as she stood there holding a present, perhaps hidden and never delivered? She gently tucked the piece of paper inside the box with the jewellery and closed it. She slipped the box into the pocket of her jacket. Chanel would not be leaving this behind.

She made her way into the small bathroom and dabbed her eyes. Looking at the tiny tub and shower combo she wondered how her tall lover managed to fit in there.

Returning to the living area she saw Chanel come out of the bedroom/office with a plastic storage box filled with paperwork and a few items.

"That's it. I'm done!" Chanel said and looked around. "It served its purpose but it no longer feels like home." She smiled sadly.

Catherine walked up and hugged the woman. Chanel moved to kiss her and Cat felt tingles shoot through her body again. Their flight over to France had been amazing as they'd spent most of the time in bed exploring each other's bodies. Chanel had felt a little uneasy about the idea at first as she was sure the flight crew had to know what was going on back there but Catherine explained they were very discreet and once she began kissing her way down Chanel's neck the brunette forgot everything else.

The sound of arguing suddenly came through the walls and they grinned, breaking the kiss.

"Let us leave this place and move on," Chanel said dramatically and Catherine chuckled. She picked up the storage box and Chanel lifted the large heavy duffle bag. They left the apartment and stopped by the ground floor to drop off the keys to the superintendent. When she told him that the remaining items in the apartment were staying the look in the man's eyes let them know he'd be inside the unit the second they left.

They had to carry the heavy box and bag all the way down the street to the main avenue to catch a cab back to their hotel. Being the off season, Catherine got a good rate on a lovely room in a decent hotel. They put Chanel's things in their room then went right back out and headed off to the Marais to do some boutique hunting. They spent the rest of the day visiting Rue de Rivoli and Les Halles before dropping their finds off at the hotel only to head out once more for dinner.

The restaurant they chose was small and intimate, off the beaten track and made the most exquisite coq au vin. They enjoyed a bottle of wine and left a generous tip for the excellent service. Catherine insisted they go up the Eiffel Tower even though conditions weren't optimal and Chanel couldn't resist her pleading look. She gave in with a chuckle and they ascended in the elevators until they were at the top.

It was much chillier at this altitude and they clung to each other as they looked down at the lights below, when the clouds parted long enough for them to see them. The lighting was ethereal and mysterious lending a strange magic to the night.

Catherine worked up her courage and moved back from Chanel to hold her at arm's length. Beautiful, dark brown eyes looked back at her curiously and Cat had to smile at how sweet she looked.

"I want you to know how very happy you've made me by coming back. I thought I'd never see you again. It felt... it felt like I'd lost an important piece of my heart. I never want to feel that again," Catherine said looking into those lovely eyes. When Chanel tried to speak Cat touched her soft lips then went down on one knee before the shocked woman.

"Chanel, will you marry me?"

"Oh my god! Yes!" she squealed, tears welling in her eyelashes. She pulled Catherine up into her arms and kissed her until the blonde swooned. She pulled back from the kiss and held Cat's face between her hands. "I love you so much!"

"I love you too!" Cat said with a smile.

Chanel's eyes widened as she released Cat. "When will we get married?"

"Next weekend. I want my father to walk me down the aisle," Catherine said with a hopeful smile.

"Who will walk me down the aisle?" Chanel said with a smirk.

Cat smiled at her. "Ben!"

Chanel opened her mouth to protest then paused to think about it. "Do you think he would?" Then she looked at Catherine. "He will not give you up."

It was the blonde's turn to take the brunette's face between her hands and look her in the eye. "Ben will always be a part of my life. I love him. I'm not marrying him and I'm not going to live with him but I will never stop loving him. As I will never stop loving you!"

Chanel saw the conviction in Catherine's eyes and felt the final remnants of her worry burn away. She smiled and leaned forward to tenderly kiss her soft lips. "And I will never stop loving you."

"We have dresses to try on, rings to buy, flowers to order, a venue to rent... oh my god! This is so exciting!" Cat gushed and Chanel chuckled at her enthusiasm.

"There is something I'd like to give you now but I'm not sure how you'll be when you see it. I think it should be part of the ceremony. It's something old. You might consider it something I borrowed but that's a stretch..." Cat paused in thought.

"For heaven's sake! Tell me what it is!" Chanel gasped with a grin.

Catherine pulled the small box from her pocket and Chanel's eyes widened as her smile became a look of confusion. There was something familiar about the old box.

"While you were packing I was poking around in the cubbyhole storage and I found this. Look inside," Catherine said gently.

Chanel cracked open the lid and saw the message from Isabelle. She sucked in a breath and froze as she took in the words and the slightly messy scrawl of Isabelle's handwriting. She reached in and lifted the tiny note out. "Ohhhh..." Chanel's hand began to shake.

Catherine placed her hands around Chanel's and stopped the trembling. "It's beautiful and it looks very old."

"Yes- It's- it belonged to Isabelle's nanna. It was the only item she received from the woman after she passed away in the nursing home. Isabelle was devastated when she lost it. We were sure someone had broken into our apartment and stolen it. I- I didn't know she'd planned on giving it to me." A tear ran down Chanel's cheek.

A gust of wind rushed through the deck and ripped the tiny piece of paper from her fingers, flinging it upwards to dance on its way to the clouds.

"OH!" Cat yelped trying to catch it.

"It's ok. It's going to Isabelle, to let her know I finally have it." Chanel said with a tiny smile on her lips as she followed the paper with her eyes until it slipped from sight. She closed the box and put it into her pocket then hugged Catherine. "Let's go somewhere warm."

Catherine smiled at her and nodded. They walked towards the elevator down.

"Can my wedding dress have a shoulder holster?" Chanel asked.

She chuckled at Cat's look of outrage.

Chapter 34

Ben woke to the feeling of soft hair tickling his nose. He blinked the sleep from his eyes and looked down to see a head with black hair resting against his left arm and chest, the long hair flowing across his chest and reaching his nose. With his free right hand he brushed the hair from his nose. He looked towards the window and saw the first hints of dawn lighting up the horizon.

He'd slept very soundly and realized it was likely because of Gretchen's presence. He no longer slept so well when he was alone.

He tried to ease out from under her but she put her arm over his chest and hugged him. He sighed.

"Gretchen. Let go, dear."

He felt the woman slowly surfacing from a deep sleep. Then he realized she was naked and her breast was pressed up against his side.

"Gretchen, please."

She stretched, rubbing her body against his then she froze as she felt the tension in Ben's body. She lifted her head and looked at him cautiously.

"Please let go so I can get up," Ben said looking away.

"I'm sorry," she said with a tiny voice and pulled away from his body quickly. She sat on the edge of the bed with her back to him. "I'm sorry. I- I didn't mean to offend you. I've... never slept so well before."

"You didn't offend me and I slept very well too. Thank you. It's just... we don't know each other well enough to be doing... this."

She was quiet for a moment. "Sleeping?"

Ben looked at her with a scowl but saw she was facing away and her question seemed to be innocent.

"Against each other... naked," he struggled to explain.

"This is how I dress for sleep. Rainor insisted. You are not naked," she said with a brief glance over her shoulder.

Ben sighed. It was too early for this conversation. He picked up his phone. There was a message from Margaux. He looked at it and shuddered. He wasn't ready to listen to it. Either she was going to continue her accusations or she was going to try for a reconciliation and he wasn't sure that was a good idea. He needed... time.

He put the phone down. It was almost 6AM, Sunday morning and he was hungry. Baby steps. Deal with getting the day started. He got up and pulled a t-shirt from his suitcase.

"Here, you can wear this for now," he said holding it out to her. She glanced at him then got up and walked around the bed to take the shirt. Ben did his best to avert his eyes.

The shirt was certainly baggy on her but with her tallness the bottom hem hinted at her delightful- No! He looked away again. He sighed to himself. He was such a fucking adolescent. He had to grow up.

"Hungry?" he asked keeping his eyes on her face.

She nodded with large dark eyes fixed on his.

He nodded as well and pulled on his t-shirt from the previous day. He'd grab a shower after he fed his stomach.

Ben walked across the condo to the kitchen and got Gretchen a glass of water and her medicine. She took it without question.

Next he looked in the fridge and saw it was well stocked. He turned to look at Gretchen. "I'm not a great chef but I can make an omelette if you'd like one. Tina usually does the cooking at home or Karen."

"Who are Tina and Karen?" Gretchen asked curiously.

Ben smiled as he thought of his family at home. "Tina is the woman carrying my child, managing my household, and taking care of my adopted daughters at home. She is also my fiancé. Karen is one of my adopted daughters. She and Penny were two of the girls I 'rescued' from the slavers. I adopted them because we couldn't find their families."

Gretchen looked at him in shock. "Is that why you're rejecting me? You're engaged!" Her expression quickly changed to confusion. "But... I thought Ms. De la Cruz was your girlfriend!"

Ben closed his eyes and rubbed his temples as the pain in her voice grated against his raw nerves. "I'm not rejecting you. I'm just not looking to begin any more relationships. I'm already in love with several women. I- I thought Margaux... she was... someone I thought I might love."

Gretchen's face paled. "Did...did Margaux leave you because of me?" she said, her voice quiet and tense.

Ben looked into her eyes and saw the dread there. "No. It began before our meeting. Margaux has... terrible issues with jealousy."

"But you're having to leave with me was the deciding factor-" Gretchen gasped, her voice rising in panic.

"Please... calm down!" Ben said and instinctively pulled her to his chest where she clung to his shirt, her heart pounding.

"I'm so sorry!" she mumbled against his shirt as he stroked her hair.

Ben felt her trembling begin to slow as she relaxed.

They stood there for a time just taking comfort from each other's touch.

Ben's stomach grumbled loudly and Gretchen pulled back to show him a timid smile.