A Submissive's Memoirs

The wine made me far less resistant and considerably less cautious that I should have been. It was only when the bar was in place and my wrists were snuggly secured to my ankles that I began to realize the folly of my blunder. The only movement I could make was to lift my head from the mattress.

"It's too tight," I complained with a edge of remorse. I tugged at the leather cuffs. "I can't move!" I declared with some panic rising in my throat.

"I know," you said sounding smug. You patted my thigh lightly and slid a finger inside of my pussy. The benign gesture momentarily quelled my panic and I closed my eyes to settle the swimming sensation inside my head. I was definitely drunk and your finger in my cunt felt good. I tried to grip it tighter but couldn't, so restrained as I was. I could do nothing but lay face down and allow you the freedom to do as you pleased.

You removed your finger and leaned forward, sliding your tongue between the lips of my pussy and licking at my clit. You sucked it between your lips and clamped it between your teeth, chewing it gently but firmly.

"Fuck me!" I demanded now breathless.

You withdrew your tongue and sat up behind me. "I'm afraid it is going to be awhile before I can do that," you informed me resolutely. My disappointment soared. I felt you rise from the bed and a moment later, I could feel your presence standing at the side of the bed. I opened my eyes and you tossed down a leather belt within my view.

You were staring down at me, intent on intimidating me. "I think I may need this," you said, nodding to the belt.

"You won't need it," I assured you, shaking my head earnestly.

"I think I might," you reiterated with lingering doubt. "You see, I still have to give you the surprise I promised you." You tilted your head a bit at my puzzled expression. "Oh, I see you thought that the spreader-bar was your surprise," you mused almost to yourself. You shook your head and clapped a hand against my ass. "Nope! That was just a means to allow me to give you the real surprise," you announced with a tone of superiority.

You stroked the cheek of my ass suggestively but very softly. "You see, I needed complete control for this. I need your complete cooperation. The restraints made that possible. Would you like to see what it is now?" you asked. My breath caught in my throat, and I nodded with some hesitation.

I watched you move away, completely from my view. I could hear you rummaging around for several moments before you returned clutching several foreign items. You placed them on the bed for me to see and I gasped aloud at the sight of them.

"No!" I hissed loudly. You place a finger to my lips to silence me or at least to quiet my rising tone. I pulled at the restraints and found them unrelenting. "No! I won't do it!" I repeated just as firmly.

You sounded almost bored with my earnest protest. "I don't recall asking for your permission. And, besides, I don't think you really mean it," you shrugged half-heartedly at me.

"Oh, I mean it, alright!" I assured you with some vehemence. "If you don't let me go, right now, I will scream," I threatened.

"Go ahead!" you urged lazily. "I'll be sure to answer the door when hotel management shows up," you replied with the same cool tone. The reversal of my misfortunes had become clearly apparent to me. You would do exactly as you pleased and there was nothing I could do to dissuade you from it.

You picked up the belt and gripped it tightly where I could see the threat of it. "You failed to use the safe-word we agreed upon," you pointed out in a soft tone. "Now, there's nothing you can do but accept the situation and make it more pleasant for both us. Besides, you are not the first little girl to be given a nice, warm enema and I am not inclined to put my prick where I've already cum once. Not without it being clean again."

The authority in your voice had returned. You were in complete control and I was at your mercy. I felt a surge of energy course through me. My stomach quivered and my pussy suddenly throbbed with anticipation. It wasn't so much the enema that I objected to, but rather the humiliation of it.

I made one last attempt at persuasion. "No! I don't want it!" I shrieked, trying to buck against the restraints. I felt the leather lick across my hips. It made a loud slap against my skin and I knew it had left a red streak where it landed. You didn't afford me the opportunity to object again.

"You are going to do exactly what you are told," you ordered briskly. I felt another stinging slap of the belt. It burned like fire and the breath rushed out of me. "I don't expect you to like it very much. But, you really should become accustomed to it, because the more you dislike it, the better I will enjoy it," you explained harshly.

The leather landed in quick succession several more times, drawing welts and turning my skin a bright pink. The cheeks of my ass were hot to the touch and your palm felt cool as you stroked me thoughtfully. My pussy gushed in response and I sobbed aloud.

"If you've had enough of that, then I'll get the other things ready," you said, sounding as if you were offering some sort of compromise. I nodded, indicating that I had indeed had enough, and I sobbed aloud again, bemoaning my fate and the fact that you were enjoying my discomfort to such a degree.

You approached the side of the bed again and I could see your penis, fully erect, hard as a granite statue, waving and bobbing in delight at my predicament. You examined each part of the assembly, testing the hose attachment, the clamp, and the other assorted pieces and making some small comments to raise the level of my anxiety.

"I chose each piece especially to suit our needs," you said as you fiddled away, prolonging my agony. "This nozzle is shaped like a butt-plug, so it should stay in place if you try to hold onto it," you said holding up a device made of steel and larger than the toy you had used earlier. "It might feel cold going in, but the water should warm it up pretty quickly." I watched as you attached a nearly six foot long rubber hose to the steel implement, and then applied a heavy coat of some thick lubricant to it.

"I'm going to insert this now, so you will have time to become more accustom to it while I fill the bag," you informed me while holding the nozzle up for me to examine.

It was long and tapered at one end; the end that inserted first. It gradually increased in circumference as the shaft extended up towards a very slender neck with a rather wide handle. The handle could serve to spread the buttocks if placed properly and that was how you were determined to use it to your best advantage. It would stretch my anus wide to accommodate the girth of the widest point. The slender neck would make it next to impossible to expel. The hose attached by screwing in place through the handle and allowing the water to flow directly into the neck.

I began to whimper with the clearer understanding of how it would work. It would not leak. Once planted, it could not be expelled. It was a clever and effective device of humiliation and torture and I was very aware that it was about to be plugged inside of me.

I was terribly frightened by the very sight of it and my knees began to shake. My complete terror brought about a rather evil and wicked grin of decadence on your part. You moved behind me and spread my cheeks wide with the fingers of one hand, while you centered the device, and applied pressure that it required to began the slow and tormenting process of insertion.

It was cold, hard steel, well greased, so it slid easily in for several inches before extending inside my rectum and beginning to expand it. I felt the first pangs of rejection as my rectum spasmed in rebellion. You slowed the progress and reassured me, "It's about half-way there. Relax now. Just a little more and it will be in."

I grunted at the effort to relax and even my drunken state would not allow it. In exasperation of my gripes that it was causing significant pain, you gave a swift push and it glided inside like a rocket. Again, the breath rushed out of me and I lay inert as a sharp pain stabbed inside of me. Slowly, the pain subsided and my anxiety decreased so that I could draw a normal breath again.

Only then, did you resume your toils, pausing to assemble a professional looking stand on which to hang the bag, once filled, so that you would be left hands-free. It took little time to accomplish that task and you returned to retrieve the last item; the water bag, itself.

Already, I had discovered that I had the capacity to accept without too much discomfort, the nozzle lodged firmly in my bottom. I found it most annoying, only because it made me yearn to cum and my pussy was already exuding a liberal amount of juice that dripped like honey on the towel you had thoughtfully place between my open knees.

You carried the bag away and I heard the water running for several minutes, knowing full well that it would be more than just slightly warm when you returned with it. I was left to ponder the entire situation on my own. I was both sexually excited, and mortified at the same time.

You were completely correct in your observation that I was not the "first little girl to receive an enema." This was true, and no doubt, I would survive it, at least physically unscathed. But, in not using the safe-word, I had given up all rights to any future control as best as I could tell. I was becoming more and more the "little girl" with each passing day; relinquishing all control to you.

I could only perceive the shadows of movement when you returned and stood behind me, hanging the bag high on the stand and connecting the hose in preparation of the final delivery. You paused to bend over me, stroking me hair away from my cheek and offering some false comfort.

"I can control the amount of the flow with the clamp," you informed me. "I'll only release a slow flow for now. Just barely a trickle," you said. I relaxed at that promise before you blissfully added, "I want to take my time with this and make it last. We'll see how much you can take and how long you can hold it for me."

"No! Please, don't!" I pleaded tearfully, now able to fully understand your motives in going slowly.

"Which would you prefer? Slow and easy, or fast and furious?" you taunted me. "Either way, you'll hold it until you suck my cock and I cum in your mouth," you added. "I promised to spank your ass until you made me cum. This will be much more enjoyable. At least, for me, anyway," you said slyly. You raised yourself from the bed and I could see the shadow as you reached to release the clamp.

I heard the click of the clamp being released and several seconds passed as the water traveled down the hose, through the nozzle and into my sufficiently poised behind. I flinched and whimpered softly as I felt the first warmth spreading through me. It was uncomfortably warm and dreadfully slow in emptying inside of me. This would in fact take some time.

You climbed onto the bed in front of me, and your penis bobbed towards my lips. It was very hard, straining towards me with veins standing out and the head appearing purple with a full rush of blood. There was a large drop of pre-cum already streaming from the tip and dripping slowly towards the bed. I tentatively took it between my lips and began to suck it slowly.

I was beginning to feel the weight of the water and I automatically gripped the nozzle tighter to prevent any leakage. It would be the ultimate humiliation to allow any water to escape and I was determined not to have that happen. In doing so, I felt the first urge to expel the water and I moaned sucking harder on your penis.

You must've sensed the urgency because you warned sternly, "You have a long way to go. There's a lot of water still in that bag and I am no where close to wanting to cum just yet."

You words were laced with an underlying threat and my mouth was full. I couldn't even reply. I groaned a little louder and sucked more in earnest. You thrust your penis towards me, shifting your hips forward and back so that you were fucking my mouth with a steady rhythm.

It seemed an eternity, but was more likely a mere minute or so before I felt my stomach cramp, and I was overwhelmed with the urgency to release the water. I began to shake my head in a panic with your penis fully engaged in my mouth. You withdrew your penis so that I could speak.

"I have to go," I hissed between clenched jaws.

You petted my hair and shook your head. "You have to make me cum first," you reminded me. "Now, look. He's getting soft and you'll have to start all over," you said woefully looking down at your flagging penis. I had no doubt that it was a deliberate effort on your part to prolong my agony yet longer. "Would you like me to hurry this up?" you asked mocking my uneasiness. I nodded in earnest expecting some mercy on your part.

Instead, you reached for the clamp and snapped it open. The water came down in a forceful gush, rushing inside of me at an alarming rate. I squealed and stiffened. "Oh, god!" I gasped. "Please! No more!" I pleaded with tears in my eyes. "I really have to go!"

You gripped my hair tightly and forced your penis between my lips once more. I sucked hard, unable to do anything more or less than what I was already doing. I heard the hot water bag make several loud noises, sucking for air in the same vigorous manner that I sucked your cock. The water suddenly stopped flowing and I knew the bag was empty.

I struggled to contain it while I worked furiously to bring about your orgasm. "Good girl," you panted. "Now, we will see just how long it takes you to make me cum."

You pumped yourself in and out of my mouth for several minutes more until very real tears were streaming down my cheeks. Abruptly, you stopped.

You withdrew your penis from my mouth and moved behind me again. You released my wrists and ankles from the restraints and a moment later, I felt the plugged nozzle being removed. I strained to hold the water inside.

"You can go now," you said patting the cheek of my ass. "Clean yourself up when you are done," you ordered firmly.

"I thought you said..." I stammered and blushed bright red, dragging myself up from the bed and hurrying towards the toilet.

"I know what I said, but did you really think I wasn't going to fuck that ass again?" you snarled. "Now, hurry up and get back in here. I'm waiting."

It was a long while before I managed to tend to the business at hand and I returned feeling contrite, embarrassed, and more than a just a little horny. I had showered again, cleaning away all evidence of any earlier activities. I was indeed squeaky clean, both inside and out. I was more than eager to finish in whatever way you had in mind our lurid adventure.

I needed no further reminders of exactly who was in control in the bedroom.