A Tale of Two Paramours Ch. 12

For the rest of Saturday, I mulled over what had happened at my blonde lover's apartment. At times, I was angry at Jessi for being angry at me for nothing more than a dream. At other times, I was angry at myself for not being able to make a choice between Jessika and Jessi. I knew I could not keep Jessi if I continued my friends-with-benefits relationship with Jessika, but I kept trying anyway.

Invariably, my anger at myself would lead me back to anger directed at Jessi for giving me what still felt like an ultimatum, which would bring me back to be angry that all this had started because of a dream I had. What I tried not to think about at all was Jessi's declaration of love. It was not a surprise - we had danced around that topic before - but it was also a challenge for me to tell her how I really felt about her. Unfortunately, I was not as sure as she was, and further, I knew that telling her I loved her would just make my current situation all the worse.

My restless day became a restless evening. I checked my phone every few minutes, hoping for a message from Jessi. However, I did not receive any messages or emails from my blonde lover. Moreover, my rational mind knew that she would not be in contact with me for some time; unfortunately, I was irrationally hoping I was wrong and that a conciliatory text would pop up at any moment.

A little after 9:00pm, my phone pinged, indicating a text had arrived. I snatched it up but immediately saw the text was from Jessika, not Jessi.

"I am home and horny," the brunette had texted.

"Would you like me to come over?" I asked, not sure I was up to it but also not sure I wanted to be alone.

"God yes, but it's not a good time. It's that time of the month for this girl," she replied.

"That is not a problem for me," I informed her.

"It is for me," she sent back.

"I understand. Are you still coming over tomorrow?" I inquired.

"About that - can we go out for dinner and then back to your place?"

"Sure," I told her.

"Great. Pick me up at 6:00. And to answer your real question, I should be good to go tomorrow. And if I'm not, you'll definitely still get a blowjob. I know - that will be a fucking hardship for you. ;)" my curvy lover texted.

"I seriously do not mind doing more, regardless of the time of the month," I reiterated.

"It's just not my thing. It makes me feel icky," she explained.

"Okay. I will hope for more but settle for a blowjob." I texted.

"Settle, huh?" she responded.

"If I have to," I teased.

"Just you wait! If that is all we can do, I will show you it is not settling. The blowjobs I give are magnificent," Jessika teased me back.

"Well, the happy ending ones are quite nice," I admitted.

"You would bring that up," she wrote.

"Well, it was magnificent," I assured her.

"I have to go now. If we keep this up, I will not be able to stand it,"

"We could have phone sex," I suggested, thinking that might be just the thing to keep my restless evening from becoming a restless night.

"Not tonight. I am serious about feeling icky," she explained.

"Okay. I hope you have a good night," I wrote.

"Thanks. You too," she texted back.

It was several hours after my text exchange with Jessika before I was able to fall asleep. And when I did sleep, I woke frequently. I knew I had several dreams during that time, but the only one I remembered was one in which I was trying to reach Jessi through a variety of natural and man-made obstacles.

Although I was tired from my long night, I was up early. I tried to bury myself in work, but I was unable to distract myself sufficiently. I could not help thinking about Jessi and Jessika, even though I knew it was futile. I could not think of any solution, and I always ended up angry at myself, at Jessi, or at us both.

Around 2:00pm I was so exhausted that I was able to take a nap, and I woke somewhat refreshed three hours later. I showered and dressed, noting to myself that choosing clothes for dinner with Jessika was much easier than for those occasions I had been out with Jessi. I was by far less concerned with looking younger or what Jessika might think. I picked comfortable jeans and a dark blue sweater. When I left my house to pick up Jessika for dinner, I was in a better mood than any I had experienced since my situation with Jessi the morning before.

As I waited for my lovely brunette lover to come to the door, I was already anticipating the activities that would come later that evening. I had now doubt that spending time with Jessika would be a great way to get my mind off of Jessi, and that sex with my curvaceous lover would be an even better way. However, those thoughts were driven out of my mind when Jessika opened the door, her expression thunderous and by far more troubling than any of the instances in which Jessi had glared at me the day before.

"Hello Mark," Jessika said icily. "We need to talk."

"What's wrong...?" I started, but a flash of those now dark gray eyes stopped me from completing my question.

"I don't want to talk about it on at my front door, Mark," she explained. "So, please get your ass in here."

"Sure," I said, following Jessika into her apartment. I noticed two things: one, she was dressed in jeans and sweater, much as I was, but did not look ready to go out; and two, her body was tense and there was almost none of her normal sway to her walk. Still, her butt looked great, and I found myself hoping we could work through whatever was bothering her. What I did not suspect - but should have - is that what we had to work through was related to Jessi.

"Have a seat," Jessika suggested, gesturing to her couch.

"Okay," I agreed in what I hoped was a calming tone. Jessika sat in a chair by the couch rather than sitting next to me.

"Read this," she commanded, holding out a piece of paper that seemed to a printout of an email.

I took the paper, but I only had time to see that it was from Jessi and that the subject line was "How about a little contest?" before Jessika ripped the email away from me.

"Hello Big Tits," she read, then fixed me with a look that was downright alarming. An angry Jessi was difficult to deal with; and angry Jessika was frightening.

"So, is that what you two call me?" she demanded.

"Um, I do not call you that," I answered, trying to figure out what I could say that, at the least, would not make my gray-eyed interrogator angrier.

"But she does and you don't stick up for me?" Jessika pushed on.

"I told her she should not call you that," I clarified. "But, I do not think it is really that negative a name..."

"You don't, huh?" Jessika challenged. "You don't think it reduces me to nothing more than a pair of boobs?"

"Um..." was all I managed to get out before Jessika again shoved the paper at me.

I took it and started to read it, although I admit was expecting the brunette to tear it from my grasp at any moment. As I made my way through Jessi's email, I began to wish Jessika would snatch it so I would not have to finish reading it.

My young blonde lover had laid out a challenge to Jessika - a competition between them regarding my affections. The idea was a threesome that was really just an opportunity for me to see which I really preferred.

When I read the last paragraph, I really knew why Jessika was so angry. Jessi had written:

"I would understand if you do not want to do this - I'm younger and a much better lay, I'm sure. I think Mark is just enamored with your fat tits that you are always shoving in his face. I have no doubt I'll win when it is a competition about sex, not just who needs the bigger bra. Oh, and one more thing to think about - Mark very much wants a threesome, and he wants it to be with the two of us. I have no problems having sex with a woman, and I guarantee I'll not hesitate to lick your cunt, suck on your tits, or do whatever turns him on. I doubt you're ready to do the same, which is fine with me, because even if you turn out to be a better lay than I suspect, I'll still win. Who would give up a bisexual twenty-year-old willing to have threesomes for an over-the-hill cow with saggy udders."

"Well?" Jessika demanded, when she saw that I was done reading.

"I had no idea she was going to send this to you," I told her.

"Shit, I knew that, Mark," the brunette scowled. "I knew it when I saw you."

"I did not know this was something she even intended to do," I clarified.

"I believe that too - you wouldn't go along with something like this," she agreed.

"Is it what she says about, um...?"

"My boobs or my age? Or whether or not I'm a good lay?" she interrupted. "No, those bother me, but they aren't why I'm angry with you."

"I do not understand," I said, and it was true. I was lost as to why Jessika was this angry with me.

"Did you tell her you wanted a threesome with me?" she snarled.

"No," I said, shaking my head.

"Then she's lying?" Jessika pushed.

"Not lying, really," I admitted.

"Before we go on, let me tell you something about my ex," the brunette said.

"Okay," I replied, unnerved by the seeming change of subject.

"When we were dating, he wanted a threesome. I told him it would never happen. When we were engaged, he suggested it as a last fling before we were married, and I told him no," she related.

"I think I understand now," I assured her.

"No, you don't," she snapped. "Not yet. And don't interrupt me."

I was on the verge of pointing out that she had already interrupted me a few times, but I thought better of it and said nothing at all.

"When we were married, he asked for one for his thirtieth birthday, and I told him to fuck off. By that time, I had realized something I had not realized before we were married. That asshole loved talking me into doing kinky things then treating me like I was a slut for doing them. And, to top it off, he then expected me to keep doing them even after he treated me like shit for doing them. Anal sex was like that - he begged and begged for it. When I gave in, he tried to get me to, um, lick him clean afterwards. When I said no, he told me that we already knew I was a dirty slut, so what would it hurt to be a little dirtier. I still refused, and we had a big fight. The next week, he wanted anal sex again and did not understand when I refused."

"I am sorry that happened..." I was saying, when Jessika cut me off.

"I asked you not to interrupt me, Mark," she snapped.

"I'm sorry, Jessika." I said simply, deciding to point out that she had not asked me but rather told me.

Jessika sighed and closed her eyes. After she took a deep breath, I saw her shoulders relax. More promising was when I saw that her eyes had lost some of the anger when she opened them again.

"I'm sorry I got that angry, Mark." The brunette told me. "But I think you'll understand why when I'm done. Just please let me tell you all of this, okay?"

I nodded, and Jessika continued:

"Well, despite my 'fuck off' response to his birthday threesome suggestion, he continued to push me. Nearly every day he would bring it up and say things like it would be his only chance and that if I loved him I would give him this. I finally told him that I would never do that, not for him or anyone else, and that I had no interest in sex with another woman. He laughed and explained that I wouldn't have to have sex with another woman - I would just have to let him have sex with her, and me, and maybe let her do stuff to me. Again, I told him to fuck off."

Jessika stopped for a few seconds, her eyes on the floor. Then she looked at me, gave me a weak smile, and continued:

"Do you have any idea what it's like to have the person who supposedly loves you push you to do things you're unsure about, even if some of those things kind of excite you, and then treat you like shit for doing them? That's one of the things that's so different with you, Mark. I can do those things that I'm unsure about but that excite me and not worry about you judging me. If we like it, great. If we don't, that's fine too."

"I have not really found anything I do not like doing with you," I grinned, and I was rewarded with the first real smile I had seen all evening, as well as some red in her cheeks.

"Same for me, Mark," Jessika said. "Even the anal. Yeah, it hurt afterwards when I had to drive, but I would be quite willing to..."

Jessika trailed off, and her eyes hardened again.

"Fuck it, Mark," she said, shaking her head. "I need to finish this, and we still need to talk about that email."

"Sorry, Jessika."

The brunette again took a deep breath before starting her story again:

"So, my bastard of an ex kept pushing me for this birthday threesome. And I kept telling him no. Well, one night a couple of days before his birthday, I come home to find him with a woman - a skinny blonde. They were just sitting and talking, but from the moment I walked in, I felt the attraction between them. I knew why she was there."

"My ex, on seeing me, said 'Hey Jess. 'I want you to meet Ashley. Ashley is a friend of my buddy Seth. She's bi and is willing to help us out. And you can see how fucking hot she is.'"

"Well, while I thought she was sorta pretty, I didn't find her all that hot, and I was unsure how a guy who liked my body as much as he claimed to could also find a stick figure with small boobs so hot. And I see that face you're making, Mark Warner. That's not a dig at you being attracted to blonde Jessica. I want to strangle that little bitch right now, but I have to admit that she has a much better figure than Ashley did."

I felt my cheeks grow warm - I had been thinking exactly what Jessika had surmised, that her comment was directed at Jessi and me as much as at her ex. I was embarrassed that she had read my face so easily, but I was pleased that she assured me that she did not intend to lump me in with her ex. It was also some more assurance that, despite her current anger, Jessika was not contemplating ending our friendship.

"So there we were, my ex salivating over a woman whose ass and hips looked, at best, androgynous. Anyway, this Ashley looked me up and down, gave me a big smile, and said to my ex, 'She is the one who is fucking hot. I would kill to have that body.' I don't know if that was supposed to put me at ease, or what, but it pissed me off. I was about to tell them both to get out when she continued, saying, 'At least I get to explore that body." Then she grabbed my face and kissed me. I was so surprised that I almost let her slip her tongue in my mouth before I pushed her away. "

"'What the fuck are you doing?' I asked her, and she turned to my ex with this surprised look on her face. At that point, I realized he must have told her I was willing. She asked him what was going on, and he smiled this stupid smile of his that he thought no woman could resist and said, 'I thought you two would hit it off when I got you together.' Then he shrugged and winked."

"You know me well enough by now to figure out that that pissed me off. I told him exactly what I thought of him and that I was not staying with him a moment longer. I then flipped him off and went to our bedroom to pack."

"I was in the middle of packing when she walked in and sat on my bed, the one I had, up to then, shared with my husband, and started making excuses for him. She told me that how he did it was wrong, but that I would be giving him the best gift ever if I did it. I asked her how she could say that, as it was clear to me he lied to her as well. Her response was that all guys lie, and he had done it just so we could have fun. Then she had the gall to take my hand and say, 'I can't be mad at him - he introduced me to a goddess.'"

"Well, at that point I told her that not only was I unwilling to watch my husband fuck another woman, I was not remotely interested in being with a woman. She looked at me with this look on her face like she pitied me and said, 'You just need to experience it once. You wouldn't care about letting a man, even your husband, fuck someone else if you knew you were going to get the better end of it.' I told her to fuck off. At that point, she decided to leave, and they were both gone when I left our apartment for the last time."

"So that is when you left him?" I asked.

"Yep," she confirmed. "I was already thinking about it - his last attempt to shame me into anal sex had almost got me there - but Ashley was the last straw. I knew I couldn't be with him if he respected me so little. I mean, isn't your husband supposed to be looking out for you, not his cock?"

"I would think so," I told her.

"And you haven't heard it all yet. He fucked her that night, in my bed. He told me that later, after he realized I wasn't coming back. He wanted to hurt me," Jessika explained.

"I am so sorry that all happened to you, Jessika," I consoled her.

The lovely brunette looked up at me and gave me a small smile before she said, "I'm not. It hurt like hell, but it made me stronger, and put me on a path to a better life. And I met you."

"I am not your favorite person right now," I pointed out.

"Oh, you're still one of my favorite people, Mark Warner," she smiled. "I'm just fucking pissed at you. And I'm beginning to hope you'll give me reason not to be."

"I'll try, Jessika," I assured her. "Let me explain..."

"Sorry, but I have one more thing to tell you," she interrupted. "Ashley emailed me a couple of days later - my ex had given her my email address - and told me she had set up a birthday threesome for my ex but that she knew it would be much better for him if it was with me instead of someone he didn't know. At the end of the email, she suggested I come and spend some time at her place, since she knew I was living with friends, and that I would be much more comfortable about it all if it wasn't the first time I was experiencing sex with another woman. I sent her a two word reply."

"Fuck off?" I guessed.

"Close," the brunette snickered. "I wrote 'fuck you'. I almost added the c-word, but I decided against it."

"And that was the end?" I asked.

"I wish!" Jessika sorted. "She called me the next day and told me that I wouldn't have anything to be jealous of during the threesome since she had already fucked my ex. I told her that was the dumbest load of shit I had ever heard. She suggested my real issue was fear of being with a woman, and she told me she could make my first experience so fantastic that I would never again want to stick to just men. My temper got the better of me, and I used the c-word, and many other words, to tell her exactly what I thought of my ex, her, and their fucking stupidity. I think her true colors came out after that, because she told me my ex deserved a woman who was willing to give him what he needed and was not afraid of her own sexual power. I hung up at that point. A few days later, they emailed me a video of the two of them with another woman - a brunette with big boobs - as they had sex. My reply was simply, 'poor girl'. I never heard from Ashley again. Unfortunately, I can't say the same for my ex."

"God I love your attitude, Jessika," I laughed.

"Well, you might not have liked me while I was married," she said. "I lost it for a while."

"I am happy you found it again," I assured her.

"Yeah, well remember that if I am still pissed after you tell me your side," she warned me, and I knew it was time for me to explain everything to her.

"There is not really much to tell," I disclosed. "It all began our second time together, when Jessi let slip she was bisexual and had given up men for several months. That morning, she used a fantasy scenario about a threesome to, well, arouse me - and her."

"And was that scenario about anyone in particular," Jessika asked in a neutral tone, although I suspected she was struggling to keep it so.