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Click hereFor a couple of minutes they just lay there, holding each other tight. Michele lifted himself up and slowly pulled his wilting penis out of her, his bravado gone. Anne rolled onto her side and hugged her legs, feeling empty and sore. Michele lit two cigarettes and they smoked in silence.
She should have left him the first time he beat her, but he apologized profusely, promising it would never happen again. They had more good times than bad, attending crazy celebrity parties, and he always introduced her as his muse. They shared their tender moments too, but those were few and always recorded on film. She was never 100% sure if he was really sincere or simply playing to the camera.
Michele believed in the whole Cinéma Vérité deal and so did she. At first it was just him filming her and their friends, but as soon as his fame began to grow, he got a string of students to record their every move. She never got used to the dispassionate waifs following them around with jealous red lights. When she drew the line at them joining Michele and her in bed, she knew it was only a matter of time. When she finally caught him in the act she felt relieved and booked a ticket on the first flight home.
When all was said and done, they were together for 5 years, officially married for 10. Thinking of how she might have done things differently was a waste of time. She had followed her heart and paid the price, but she had no regrets. She had moved on, hopefully he'd do the same. Sitting by the pool in Tuscany, Anne quietly smiled to herself. She had a feeling this year was going to be good.
I thought this was a great short story, with realistic descriptions, and an interesting setup and backstory. The forced trip down memory lane was a nice twist, and it was good to see "She had followed her heart and paid the price, but she had no regrets" in the end. Don't listen to the anonymous grammar police, especially when they are wrong.
I'm an American, so despite knowing that disorientated is the British version of disoriented, it throws me off every time I see it. Thus, I can understand the other comment about that word. However, I recognize that this is a big world we live in which doesn't have to cater to Americans, so I can deal with odd words on occasion, unlike the other poster. Seriously, if planning to ding someone for poor grammar on a public forum, at least make sure to have the facts straight about the complaint.
As far as "stereotypical" hills, I don't see anything wrong with that phrasing either. I've never been to Italy, but I can easily picture the Tuscan landscape described in this story based on the typical pictures/paintings I've seen. Those images are so predominant that they have become stereotypical. Sheesh! Some people like to complain about anything.
Thanks for posting your story. I hope you'll share some more.
Dear Readers
It is a huge thrill to imaging thousands of people reading (and perhaps even masturbating to) to this story!
I was trying to capture a kind of arty Eurocentric atmosphere which would certainly not be to everyone's liking, but I appreciate all comments, positive or negative.
Is the language over-blown? The story too arty-farty? Is the sex realistic?
It seems (or I hope) that the score is settling around 4.
What would make this story 5-star material?
Regards
RLS
Some of the language might be a little overblown, but generally speaking I thought the what was published today could be the start of an interesting story of rediscovery
"Artsy-fartsy" must mean "literate" The writing is smooth and grammatical, and the author does more than the usual Literotica plod from one point to the next, telling us as each step what he has done.
The writing didn't improve after that. "Stereotypical" hills? Huh?
Just so artsy-fartsy, I could have puked.