After Dawn, What Came Next

Fallon put the lid back on the box before she made a fool of herself and ate the entire thing in one sitting. It really was excellent chocolate, rich and sweet, leaving a lingering creamy aftertaste on the tip of her tongue. Neither one of them had said a word too preoccupied with the chewing and savoring of the candy. With an empty mouth and hands trembling in nervous agitation, she moved to toy with the red roses in the vase. Shuffling them around so that the tiniest buds were in the front and the bigger, less delicate blooms were toward the back. “Um…did I tell you thanks?”

Catcher nodded. He sidled up behind Fallon and stilled her nervously fluttering fingertips with his palm. How he wished he could put all this social graces and getting to know her better stuff behind him, get down to business, and make his intentions clear…crystal clear. She was soft, and beautiful, and curvy, and fit against him so nicely. In a way, trying to win her heart seemed like trickery and deceit. Wouldn’t it be better if they both knew where they stood with one another and could work from that point forward? His brother and Janine and scores of other people had wisely advised him against such a direct attack. But, he couldn’t imagine how doing something practically akin to lying could serve him any better than the truth. “You did.”

Catcher’s breath was a warm sensual caress down the curve of her neck. His fingertips were light, brushing over the tops of her hands and tracing a path to the pulse points in her wrists. He was standing so close, towering over her yet somehow meeting her eye to eye. His arousal and his interest were painfully apparent to her and matched hers in kind. It seemed wrong to have to endure all the ritualistic trappings of dating when their bodies were so on line with each other.

Her body wanted what it wanted and it wanted him. That in itself was wrong all things considered. Her heart had belonged to Daniel for so long it didn’t seem right to give anyone else the chance to win it from him. Was the space she had left even big enough for a man like Catcher or was she only fooling herself with the notion?

Catcher knew a thing or two about women. Eloise had trained him well in that regard. He traced the soft muscle of Fallon’s neck with the blunt edges of his teeth and gentle swabbing motions of his tongue, nuzzling at the tender flesh. He was rewarded with a sudden gasp, the heated blush of her skin beneath his lips, and the sweet musky smell of her arousal. He gripped her hips, spinning her to face him effectively trapping her between his body and the dresser. Chuckling softly at her reaction to him, the molding and gravitation of her body to his, he lowered his mouth to claim hers.

Catcher kissed as good as he looked and moved. Claiming her mouth with determined possession and confident assuredness and such grace and cunning that she was gasping for breath and clinging to him to remain upright. She kissed him back, shocked at her own wild abandon. They battled for control of the moment with their lips and tongue. In the end she was the one to give in first, molding her mouth to his and opening up for him in complete surrender. Dizzied and breathless after his sudden retreat, she leaned against him for support and grappled for something to say. “I…I…ah.”

Catcher swooped down and stole whatever words Fallon was about to say from her lips. He had never been one to leave a woman wanting, unless of course, that was exactly what she wanted. Poetic prose formed in his mind, praises of her beauty and the divinity of her precious kiss. She was like the rose on the bush, the doe in the field, the sunlight on his face, and the moon, cool and silvery in the night. He traced a finger across the seam of her mouth stilling her with a soft, breathless hush. He should be doing something more mundane than what he was doing. Asking her to dinner or a movie or one of a dozen such sanctioned activities for a first date. Instead, he asked, “Are you there with me, Fallon? Tell me.”

Fallon couldn’t form two syllables. Catcher’s fingertip on her lips was warm and the pad stilling her lips surprisingly gentle. This was a man used to being in control of all things. Yet, in his question he had handed control over to her. Words failed her and there wasn’t really any need for them. The joke in college had been that a good girl insisted on dinner first. She wasn’t, she was beginning to realize, necessarily, a good girl and her hunger was not for food. “Yes.”





















































Chapter 52

“Am I a vampire now?” Christian rasped. He was dazed and confused, still reeling from the effects of the blood Cat had forced down his throat. He heard a soft song of voices in his head. The song was as old as the ages and had been sung by countless voices throughout time. There was an incredible feeling of connectedness to the ebb and flow. As if his soul had been irrevocably woven into the strands strung so tightly together that formed the words. Everything he thought he knew about the world had been turned on its end and Cat was at the center of it all.

He rested with his head planted firmly in her lap. Staring at the ceiling as if he had the ability to see through the floors above his head and into the stars into the sky. He wondered which of those bright pinpricks of light was Cat. The gentle rasp of her fingernails against his scalp was soothing, holding him anchored to the ground, lest he should simply just drift away.

“No. You are still human and just as annoying as ever,” Cat answered lightly. She marveled at the contrast between her bronzed skin and his pale hair. The soft strands seemed to absorb color, sometimes turning a shimmering golden color, sometimes a dark chocolate brown, and sometimes a fiery orange. The blue of his eyes was a play of light and shadow. The pupils, round and black, were an endless chasm in the rippling sea of a vast ocean. His cheeks were tinged pink, flushed with warmth and life. She had seen a glimpse into his soul and found within it a childlike eagerness and wonder. With that first drop of her blood forced past his lips and the taste of his blood lingering sweet and pure on the tip of her tongue. She had stripped his innocence away and along with it, hers as well.

Christian could not return to the world he had known. He didn’t belong in hers, but setting him free into a world he was no longer a part of and not protecting him from the newness of hers was cruel. He truly belonged in neither world, but was part of them both. Christian was alone in the human world. Both his parents had passed on and his family was scattered across the country. He had come, followed the trail to this place to get the answers he so desperately sought and now, he had them. Vampires and werewolves were real and he was an inextricable part of them. He would never be alone, truly alone, ever again. “I’m sorry, Christian. I truly am.”

Cat kept apologizing as if everything was her fault. Christian turned onto his side and struggled to find a comfortable position, but not such a compromising one to rest his head. Her lap was a nice place, warm and soft and the vintage denim so smooth against his cheek. If anything, the blame should be on his shoulders. He had asked and she had answered each and every question with complete honesty with nothing more than a drop of her immortal blood. He had seen into the eye of eternity and from that there was no going back.

Christian had passed the point of no return on the day he had cracked open Rachael’s journal and made the decision to pick up where his dad had left off. He had set out to prove to everyone that his dad wasn’t crazy. The clues had come and had led him here. He hadn’t stopped to think about how it had happened though. It was almost as if someone was leading him here, dropping clues like breadcrumbs for him to follow.

Who though and why? Why would one of their own want to be discovered? What could there possibly be to gain? The answer to that was only too apparent. The discovery itself was the key. Exposure of vampires and werewolves, of the entire paranormal world, would set the world on its ear and turn everything upside down. The thought of the eventual end of things, had he been allowed to continue on his previous course, sent a chill down his spine. There was something to gain. War, perhaps and possibly the extinction of a species and the desperation that came along with preserving such a rare and precious breed as vampires and wolves. On the eve of such a destruction vampire kind as a whole would be pushed to preserve their own. They would make more and more vampires and the wolves would breed until humanity was bred out all together.

Cat was special. Even without the sharing of her blood, Christian could tell that. Her friends were unusual and unique in their own rights, but only she was special. Her blood told him secrets. Truths about herself perhaps even she didn’t know about. She was alone in her world. A misfit trying so desperately to force herself to fit in, she was neither vampire nor wolf, but not human either. Strangely enough though, she was more like all three than what she wanted to admit. She had a human heart, a wolf’s soul, and a vampire’s timeless, ageless body.

Christian reached up to tug on a loose clump of hair that had fallen over her shoulder. The strands were dark and velvety soft. He twisted the strands around his fingers and slid them down its length. “Who are we, Cat? I mean, who are we now, Cat. Who?”

“Nobody if not still ourselves and so much a part of each other.” Cat smiled and reached to grasp Christian’s hand. For far too long she had denied all the conflicting and differing parts of herself. Refusing to admit her uniqueness and pretending that she was just one of many and a small part of a much bigger whole. Tom’s words rang true, stinging her heart. Someone had set Christian’s feet on this path and led him here. His deepest desire was for the truth and now that he had it. She had to wonder what he would do with it.

What would humanity do with a secret such as theirs? Would they run terrified or embrace the wonder of beings such as vampires and wolves? Would they search for the bigger truths or cower in fear of them? Sometimes, she thought it might be better if she hadn’t been born, if her parents, the brotherhood, and the pack had no fear for her, and if she had no fear for herself. She wanted to be invisible, but the gift in her blood would never lead her to live a life of such peace.

Did whoever wish their exposure want her life in exchange for his silence? Why? The answer was simple for such a complicated plot such as the one that was unfolding. She carried not immortality in the way vampires had come to think of it, but true immortality in her veins. It was the reason the brotherhood guarded the wolves with such veracity. The reason the pack had remained separate from humanity and the reason she would never ever have a normal life. She could share the gift of life at quite possibly the cost of her own.

Christian watched the shadows of realization pass across Cat’s pretty face. Hers had been a sheltered life. She had always known the truth about herself, but had never been forced to face it until now. He wished that he could protect her, but he was hardly in a position to protect himself let alone anybody else. She was hurt, confused, and still trying so desperately to deny everything she had never had to admit to herself until now. “I’m sorry too, Cat.”

Cat eased Christian’s head off her lap, stood, and began to pace the room. Crouched on the floor and uncertain about what to say, Christian followed her footsteps with his eyes. “I was born to change the world, you know. Maybe, it’s time we stopped hiding and admitted the truth of who we are to the world. The real world, I mean. There’s so much we can do…I can do with this,” she said thrusting out her bruised wrist. The fang marks she had inflicted on her flesh were scabbed over and healing. The bruising from the desperate gnawing from his teeth and draw of his lips on her skin had faded to a sickly greenish yellow. “This…this thing that I am…this blood…it can cure as easily as it can kill. Think about it…a world without death or pain…how perfect it could be.

“The gift of the wolf is not a simple one and neither is the burden they carry inside of them. I am part curse, part magic, and part something that never should exist at all. The funny thing is. I don’t know which part is which. A vampire would sell his immortal soul for just a taste of such a gift. To get back what was lost, either given or taken by force, what vampire wouldn’t kill for such endless possibilities?

“My mother and father, they did such a thing. He drank deeply of her gift and she of his…and well, here I am. That was when they truly realized what the pack already knew. The joining of gift and curse…the result of it…what a creature…a truly damned creature they had created. I belong nowhere. I’m not human. I’m not a wolf. I’m not a vampire. I’m something that shouldn’t be in the first place. My parents love me and I love them. The pack would die to protect me. The brothers would give their lives to save mine. But, as to what I am. Nothing. I am nothing at yet at the same time… something. I am…me.”

Christian stood and gave Cat something she could not give herself. Acceptance. Saying nothing he wrapped his arms around her and drew her into the shelter of his embrace. Out of sheer impulse, he kissed the top of her head. “That’s enough, Cat. That you are you is enough.”

Cat snuffled and clung to the back of Christian’s shirt. He smelled of warm sunny days and dark cool nights. His heart pounded against her cheek. She closed her eyes and reveled in the overwhelming essence of everything he was. She knew what it was to be pack. She knew what it was to be a vampire. But, there was one thing she didn’t know. Something all her endless hours of training hadn’t prepared her for. “Can you teach me?”

“Teach you what?”

“How to be human?”

Christian tightened his grip around Cat’s narrow shoulders and squeezed her tighter against him. She didn’t think she was human? That she hadn’t learned all the important lessons in life? In the last few hours she had learned everything she needed to know in terms of being human. She had made mistakes. Suffered heartbreak. Been beaten to death by doubt and paralyzed by fear. He couldn’t teach her what she already knew, as far as the pain of being human. But, had she ever seen the better side, the softer side, the pleasure and the joy of being human? Humans were so beautifully fucked up because whatever mistakes they made were temporary. One lifetime really wasn’t truly that long. For her though, one lifetime could last forever. Could an immortal being learn mortality? He thought perhaps, she could. “Where would you like to start?”

Cat cupped Christian’s jaw. The pale bristles on his chin were rough and scratchy against the palm of her hand. The stubble of his beard was a slightly darker shade of blond than his hair and threaded through with highlights of gold. Not all lessons had to be painful. Sometimes, bruised and battered after one of John Mark’s training sessions in the gym. He would give her a chocolate drop to ease her suffering. The promise of the sweet treat, that she had done something to earn it instead of simply raiding the cabinets to find one, was enough to make her run faster and work harder. The sheer joy of earning the reward eased the lingering aches and pains and gave her the incentive to get right back up to do it again.

She actually had spent quite a bit of time with humans. Leigh had taught her how to crochet as a way to pass idle time. Alexander had taught her about planting things in the soil and the pride of watching them grow. Erica helped her bake her first cake. Even her own father had shown her things, remnants from his human life, such as sprawling out under the pricks of light in the night sky and playing connect the dots. But, no one had ever been able to truly show her or able to explain what it was like to walk a mile in humanity’s shoes.

There were so many mysteries in life she had not experienced first hand. It was one thing to know and to inadvertently eavesdrop on the things that went on behind closed doors and another to experience them for herself. Christian’s grip on her was warm, gentle yet firm. As if her knees suddenly gave out, he’d keep her upright. As if she fell, he’d be there to catch her before she hit the ground. She turned his face to meet hers and hovered with her lips poised inches above his, almost daring them to touch. “Here, I think would be the best place.”

Christian hadn’t kissed or done a lot of other things with many girls. He would like to think he was prepared for any event that might arise with members of the feminine persuasion, but he was woefully unprepared for Cat. Her kiss was demanding and at the same time soft and yielding. Uncertain and so damnably sure, as she took what he offered and gave back to him in equal measure. He hadn’t worried about being careful or cautious with any other girl. But, he had never, at least knowingly, kissed a girl who wasn’t one hundred percent human before either.

Cat was probably a lot more unbreakable than an ordinary human and yet, at the same time so fragile, delicate as spun glass. He could hurt her in ways he couldn’t imagine. Physically, she matched every swab of his tongue, thrusting so warm, soft, and eagerly inside the borders of his mouth. He could taste his blood on the tip of her tongue. The coppery tang of it should sicken him, but it didn’t. To taste it and know he had provided her the one thing she needed to live filled him with an intense sense of pride. He was proud, as weird as it seemed, of doing nothing more than bleeding for her.

She had bled for him too. Filled his mouth with the very essence of the most treasured part of her, trusted him with her deepest secrets, and given him a taste of life itself. Cat burned with the heat of the wolf and he could feel the sting of that fire on his skin. She claimed to be a dead thing devoid of life, but holding her, he had never felt more alive. He could teach her what it was to be human, nothing but human, the pleasure and the pain of it, and the joy, so much joy in feeling nothing more than the pounding of your heart in your chest, the panting intake of urgent breaths into your lungs, the heat of two bodies pressed together, and the pressure of two mouths fused as one.

This moment was what humans were born for. Why they existed at all. Darwin got it all wrong in his assumptions of survival of the fittest. This was life. Humans were born to die. And wasn’t that the ultimate cosmic joke common to all living things? They lived only to die. Christian spared not much of a thought to death, not in this moment wrapped in a tangle of limbs with Cat and tasting the gift of life on the tip of her tongue. He could only think of life.

Cat eased out of Christian’s arms long enough to pull her t-shirt over her head and fling her bra across the room. The way he stared at her left her toes curling and her body tingling in places she hadn’t known existed. She had no particular shyness about being naked in front of another person. His eyes roamed over her skin with the burning heat of a caress. She wanted to know what the secret was to being human and he had promised to teach her. One would think humans had the market on being human and maybe, they did. But, standing here, half dressed with her lips swollen and on fire from his kiss and her body consumed by the slow burn in his stare. She not only felt human. She realized that she was human.

Christian tore his shirt over his head. Cat was so beautiful, standing there unabashedly and wonderfully naked, wearing nothing but a shy, curious grin. Her eyes twinkled with wonder. He stood allowing her time to explore his body with her eyes. He wasn’t built like a weight lifter. He didn’t have rippling muscles or even a decent tan. There was nothing about him that was spectacular or distinguished him from anything other than a plain, ordinary guy. Bravely, she reached out to touch him. His skin prickled from the brush of her fingertips over his shoulders, traveling along the collarbones and down his breastbone, pausing to hover over his beating heart.