Alicia Ch. 17

And so I was "loaned out" in a sense to Kathy by my Mistress. Alicia was to leave on Thursday afternoon, and she wouldn't be back until Sunday evening. I got off work that Thursday at about three in the afternoon, went home and helped Alicia pack. When she was ready, I walked her to the car. She hugged and kissed me. I said, "I'll call you tonight at the hotel."

"No. I'll call you each night from the hotel. If you're not in, I'll leave a message. Just keep Kathy company, she's hurting now."

"Okay. I'll keep her company. But, I'd rather be with you."

Alicia smiled at me, a little sadly I thought, "I know you would. I'd rather have you with me. But, Kathy's in need right now, and I cannot be there for her. Just do this thing for me, okay?"

"We'll probably go out to dinner tomorrow night, but I told her I'd fix dinner for her Saturday night, if that's all right."

"Her place or ours?"

"Ours, I think. I'll feel more comfortable here."

"Plus, I might call, is that it?"

"Something like that," I said.

She kissed me again, a long, lingering kiss that promised much. I held it until she pulled away. Damn! I loved that woman!

She drove away, and I felt sad. I had to work tomorrow, first shift, so I went back into the house, made supper, and watched TV until it was time to go to bed. Alicia called at eight-thirty and confirmed that she had arrived in Myrtle Beach safely. I felt a little better, but I still missed her.

The next day, Friday, was a pretty routine day. I had to go to 14 West several times. Kathy was working, and she seemed glad to see me. We decided where we wanted to go that night, and I made it clear that I wanted to be home by about nine, so that I could take Alicia's call.

"Hey, no problem, Phil. We can hang at your place for a while, then I'll head on home." Suddenly, she struck me as being a little uncertain herself about the weekend. I realized that she might have been as uncomfortable as I was with the situation.

Kathy and I met at a local sports bar that evening at six. We sat there, she with her screwdriver, me with a beer, not really saying anything.

"Listen, Phil," she said, "if this is uncomfortable for you, I can go home. I don't want to be a pain."

"It's all right," I said. "You're not a pain. I'm just not used to being away from Alicia, that's all." I finished my beer, ordered another, and a refill for Kathy.

"I can understand that. I thought that Twyla and I were a lock. But, it just didn't work out."

I didn't know if she wanted to go any further, so I didn't respond. Then, she said something that surprised me. She said, "Phil, what were those marks I saw on you in the hospital?"

I must have blushed furiously, because she immediately said, "You don't have to tell me, if you don't want to. I guess the vodka is getting to me. I'm not thinking before speaking."

"Tell you what," I said. "How about if we talk about it at home. I'd rather not here."

"Okay, if that's what you want," she said.

We ate hot sandwiches and chips, had more drinks, and watched some pre-season baseball. The Atlanta Braves were going to be strong again.

We drove over to mine and Alicia's condo. I put some country music on, and fixed her another screwdriver. She was getting a little drunk, and I guessed that she would probably go to sleep before long.

Presently, she started talking about Twyla, and I could tell she was missing the petite blonde.

"I was in love, but she didn't see it that way. I don't think Twyla was really ever very comfortable with her lesbian side. Oops, did I offend you, Phil?"

"Not at all," I said, glad to be off the subject of the marks on my butt.

"I mean," she started again, slurring her words ever-so-slightly, "I mean, she was a great lover, but she was unsure of herself. And," she took another swig of the drink, "she was beautiful, just beautiful. Oh, I'm sorry. I don't suppose you want to hear this."

"Go ahead and talk about it, Kathy, if it makes you feel better. I'm a big boy. I can handle it."

"Yes, I suppose that you can handle it, Phillip," she said. She laughed a little, then began crying softly. I held her, not saying anything, while she cried herself out. After a little while, she looked up at me and said, "I'm tired now. I think I'll go to sleep."

"No problem. Just make yourself comfortable on the couch." I didn't have to say more. Kathy had already kicked off her shoes and stretched out. A couple of minutes later she was breathing deeply. I got a blanket out of the closet and covered her up. I glanced at the clock: nine forty-five. Alicia still hadn't called, and I had to tell myself not to be worried. She was a big girl--literally--and could take care of herself.

As if my mind was being read, the phone rang. I picked it up. "How is everything going?" said the voice on the other end. It was Alicia.

The relief palpable in my voice, I said, "Oh, it's going okay. How's the conference?"

"Some boring stuff, some interesting stuff. Did you see Kathy?"

"Yes. She's asleep on the couch," I said.

"Already? It's hardly ten o'clock."

"Well," I said, "it's those screwdrivers. They'll get you every time. She talked a little about Twyla. You're right; she's hurting some. I expected you to call a little earlier."

"Well, I was with one of my doctor friends," Alicia replied. "We were having wild sex."

"Damn," I said, "I knew that I should have come along."

"Well, you know me," she said, "if I don't get good sex pretty often, there's no telling what I might do. I'm sort of spoiled in that department."

"Me, too," I said.

"Hmmph! All you want is to get spanked."

"And sex," I replied. "I miss you, Mistress."

"I miss you too, Phillip," she said.

"Is everything all right, Alicia?"

"Everything is fine, Phillip."

"You would tell me, wouldn't you?"

To someone not used to talking to Alicia, the pause would not have been noticeable. But there was a pause just before she answered, "I would tell you, Phillip."

I didn't feel any better, but I answered, "Okay."

We talked of inconsequential things for a few more minutes, the way married people do, then said our goodbyes. "I'm looking forward to seeing you," I said. "Call me tomorrow night?"

"Yes. What are you planning for tomorrow night?"

"Maybe a movie early, then I'll probably cook for her over here, then send her home."

"Okay, I'll call you late, around midnight."

"I love you, Mistress," I said.

"I love you too, Phillip."

* * *

Kathy woke up at about nine the next morning, with a slight hangover. I was already up, reading the newspaper. I made her coffee and juice, which she drank thirstily, and breakfast, which she picked at.

"I hope that I didn't embarrass you or myself last night," she said, a bit sheepishly.

"Nope, you didn't," I said. "I had a good time."

"Are we still on for tonight?" she asked.

"Of course, if you want to," I replied.

"Yes, I do. Do you mind if we skip the movie? I'd rather just come over here and hang out, if that's all right."

"How about if we rent a video?" I asked. "There's one I've been wanting to see. I'll pick it up, and we can watch it here."

"That's fine," she said. "I can get it while I'm out today, if that's all right with you."

"That's all right with me," I said. I was suddenly struck with how odd and uncomfortable it was for a woman to be asking me if something was all right. With Alicia, she usually made the decisions and I carried them out. I was comfortable with that arrangement. But here was Kathy, practically asking my permission to pick up a video from the store. It didn't feel right. Twyla had said that Kathy was the bossy one, but right at that moment, she seemed a little meek to me.

Kathy finished her breakfast and grabbed her coat and purse. She said, "Look, Phil, I really appreciated last night. We don't have to get together tonight if you don't want to."

"Kathy, I want to get together tonight. Don't worry about it. I'm glad to do it." At the same time, I was thinking, I'm doing this because Alicia wants me to.

She smiled, relieved. "Okay. I'll pick up the video. What time do you want me over here?"

"How about six-thirty or seven? That should give us time to watch the movie, and have dinner."

"Six-thirty it is. See you then." She leaned over and gave me a quick kiss on the cheek. "Thanks again, Phil. You're a good guy." Then she left.

To be honest, I was a little relieved when Kathy was gone. I now had the place to myself, which was lonely but bearable. I kept thinking about the conversation I had had with Alicia the night before. She had seemed upset and I wondered why. Maybe, I rationalized; she was just missing me the way that I missed her. Yeah, that was probably it.

I knocked around the house for the rest of the day, going out just long enough to go to the gym and to the grocery store. For dinner, I decided that I would prepare grilled salmon, seasoned rice, asparagus, and hot rolls. I picked up a blueberry pie and ice cream for dessert. I may not have been cooking for Alicia, but I could serve Kathy a good dinner. I also picked up a bottle of a nice white zinfandel, and a bottle of vodka, along with some fresh orange juice for her screwdrivers.

That afternoon, I laid down and took a nap. Before drifting off to sleep, I couldn't help myself: I masturbated, thinking of Alicia spanking me hard, and then making love to me. I was rested when I woke up at about five o'clock. I took a shower and put on some scrubs. I wanted to have a good evening with Kathy, but I also wanted to talk to Alicia. I decided that I would try my best to have a good time. It wouldn't be that hard since I liked Kathy, but it wouldn't be the same without my wife and Mistress.

At six-thirty, right on time, the doorbell rang. I opened the door and let Kathy in. She was wearing loose jeans and a midriff-baring top. I noticed that she wore a ring through her navel.

"Hi," I said, "come on in. How do you feel?"

She smiled at me and said, "I feel just fine, Phillip, ready to do it all again." She handed me the videotape. "Is this the right one?"

I looked at it. "Yep, that's it. I hope that you like it, too. Now, what would you rather do first: Watch the movie, or eat dinner?"

"Why don't we listen to some music first, have a couple of drinks, then eat dinner?"

"Sounds good to me," I said. "What would you like to drink?"

"You know what I like, baby--I mean, Phil." She blushed and stammered, "I'm sorry, Phil. I guess I just had a `Twyla flashback.'"

"No problem. One screwdriver coming up."

I had wine, she had her screwdrivers. It wasn't long before both of us were feeling a little more relaxed. I put some eighties rock, my favorite, on the stereo, and soon Kathy and I both were reminiscing about the good times we had had in the past.

I made her several screwdrivers, and refilled my glass several times. I was working in the kitchen on supper, and she was sitting at the bar, watching me. For the first time that weekend, I was starting to really relax and have fun.

Then, she dropped a small bomb. "All right, Phil, 'fess up. What are those marks on your butt?"

I stopped what I was doing and looked at her. I could feel my face getting hot. Finally, I took a deep breath and said, "Okay, Kathy, I'll tell you. Once, when Alicia and I were drinking wine and fooling around, I um, let her spank me."

Her eyes got wide. "She spanked you? Man! I've heard of men spanking women before, but I've never heard of a woman spanking a man before." She took another long pull at her drink and said, "Well, did you like it?"

I must confess, I didn't tell the truth. At least, not the entire truth. I felt that mine and Alicia's private relationship was just that: private. I also knew that it was different, and that most people, probably not even Kathy, would fully understand it. So I said, "Well, it was different, I'll say that. Nobody had ever done it to me before."

"Did it hurt," she asked, grinning (a bit drunkenly).

"Damn right it hurt!" I exclaimed. "Alicia has a hard hand."

"Oh my God!" Kathy exclaimed, and broke down laughing.

I felt a little embarrassed and pissed off, but decided not to get mad. Alicia and I had talked about what would happen. It was better to let Kathy think that it was a one-time thing, rather than a regular, treasured part of our relationship.

"I'm sorry," Kathy said, chuckling. "I don't mean to embarrass you, Phil. It's just the first time I've ever heard of it." Her face grew serious for a moment. "In a way, it's really sort of sweet. I mean, that you would let her do that to you. You must really love her."

I stopped what I was doing again, and this time I was perfectly honest with Kathy. "Kathy, I worship the ground that woman walks on."

She gave me a long look, and said, "I believe that, Phil."

Then, like some intoxicated people will do, Kathy became a little maudlin. She moped around for a little while, obviously thinking of Twyla. I noticed and asked, "Thinking about Twyla?"

"Yeah. I guess I'm not quite over her. Damn it, Phil! I'm jealous of what you and Alicia have. I want it, too."

"Well, Kathy, I believe there's someone for everyone. Maybe the time's just not right yet."

"Yeah," she said a little sadly, "maybe not."

Dinner was ready, and we sat down to eat. Gently, I encouraged Kathy to drink water, not wine or screwdrivers, with her meal. She did as I asked. For dessert, I made extra-strong coffee, and we had cherry pie with ice cream. I was glad to see that she ate heartily. After dinner, we went out on the balcony so that she could smoke a cigarette. It was dark and cool. The stars were out.

"I hope that I didn't make you too uncomfortable," she said.

"Well, it's not something I would announce to the world. But you are my friend, and my nurse, and I felt like I owed you some sort of explanation."

She smiled at me and said, "Don't worry, Phil, your secret is safe with me."

"Good. Why don't we go in and watch the movie?"

The film was a period piece about gangsters set in an unnamed eastern city, by a producer-director team of two brothers whose work I especially like. I sipped a glass of wine, then a cup of coffee. Kathy went back to screwdrivers, though at a slower pace than before. By ten-thirty, she was mellow again. I suggested a cup of coffee, and she took the hint. "Okay, okay, Phillip. No more vodka tonight. Can we listen to some music before I go home?"

Even though I didn't really want her to spend a second night, I told her, "Kathy, you probably should sack out on the couch tonight. I wouldn't feel right letting you drive home."

"Looking out for me again, huh? And what if I insist on driving home?"

"Well, I can't make you stay. I would hope that you would use your common sense. I mean, I like you Kathy, and I don't want anything to happen to you."

"And besides, if anything did, you'd be in for the spanking of your life when Alicia got home, wouldn't you?" She grinned at me drunkenly.

I took it as the joke I hoped it was meant to be. "Something like that," I said.

"Be back in a minute," she said, and got unsteadily to her feet, then walked down the hall to the bathroom.

I went into the dining room and began clearing the table. Kathy came back from the bathroom. I had heard the water running in there; she must have freshened up some. She looked a little more alert. Anyway, I was loading the dishwasher when I felt her arms go around my waist from the back. I straightened up, and Kathy hugged me harder. I started to remove her arms from around me.

"No, please Phillip. Not yet. Just let it be like this for a little while." We stood there for a couple of minutes, Kathy embracing me from behind, me getting more uncomfortable by the second. I turned around. Kathy kept her arms around me.

"Kathy, I really don't think we should..."

"I know. I should let you go. But I haven't hugged anyone in a long time. Just let me hug you for a minute longer. Okay?"

I didn't say anything, just gave her a (what I thought was) a chaste, brotherly hug in return. She burrowed into my shoulder. After a moment, she looked up at me and said, "I've preferred women for years. I had forgotten how nice a man can be." She smiled ruefully, and said, "How would you like to spank me?"

"Are you serious?" I asked. That was absolutely the last thing I expected her to say.

She sighed and said, "Yes. I would let you."

"Kathy, that would be a very intimate act. I don't think it would be right for us to do that."

"I know it wouldn't be right. But damn it! It could be our secret. Phillip, I haven't been touched in a long time. I need to feel the touch of another person."

I wouldn't be lying if I said that, just for a moment, I pictured turning Kathy's tight little body over my knee and giving her a good, hard spanking. But it would have been a betrayal of my marriage, as well as contrary to my character. I was the one who was spanked, not the one doing the spanking. Apparently, Kathy was pretty starved for affection, as well as being half-drunk. She needed to be treated with care.

I disengaged her gently, and walked her over to the couch. "Kathy," I said, "I'm your friend. Alicia's your friend. Let's not do anything that would jeopardize that."

She seemed contrite. She looked down into her lap and said, "I know. I'm sorry. I really just need someone right now." I heard her sniffle, and when she looked up, there were tears running down her face. "I'm just a bit lonely, that's all."

"I understand that. But doing something we're not supposed to is not the right way to remedy that. Now, how about a cup of coffee?" I was eager to change the subject, and eager to get her on her way home. Alicia would be calling in about an hour.

She nodded and I got up and went into the kitchen. I got out cups, and poured coffee for both of us. By the time I got back to the couch, she had composed herself.

We drank our coffee. She smiled at me again and said, "Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure," I said.

"How many times did Alicia spank you?"

"Just the once," I lied.

"How did you like it?"

"Um, well, like I said before, it was different."

"Phil, you didn't answer my question. Did you like it?"

I decided to be honest. "Well, it did hurt, but there was a part of me that enjoyed giving up control like that."

"I can see how you might do that with Alicia," Kathy said. "I mean, she has a commanding presence. She must have a foot on you in height, Phil."

"Yes, it comes out to just about a foot."

Wistfully, Kathy said, "I think I might like giving up control to someone that I really trusted. I mean, that's what spanking is all about, isn't it?"

"I suppose. But I can hardly believe that of you, Kathy. I mean, you've always struck me as an assertive personality, not willing to give up control."

"Phil, to be honest with you, it's all pretty much an act. Deep inside, there's a part of me that wants to give up control--even to be spanked, if that's what it means."

We fell silent for a while, each of us lost in our thoughts. I was thinking of all the secrets about myself that I had revealed that night. It was scary; I hoped that I could trust Kathy's discretion. I looked over at her. She seemed to read my mind. "Don't worry, Phil. Your secrets are safe with me. I'm a friend. I had a moment of weakness. Can you forgive me?"

"Of course, Kathy. Actually, there's nothing to forgive. We didn't do anything wrong. We do know a lot more about each other than we did when the evening began, though."

She laughed. "I'll say that. Well, I've got to be going. Can I help with the dishes, or anything?"

"No thanks, I'll take care of them."

"Then, can I have another hug before I go? I really enjoyed that."

"Sure you can," I said. I gave her another hug.