An Anniversary Party to Remember

The night of my parents' 30th wedding anniversary was definitely one that nobody in my family will ever forget. I can't think of any other way to begin this story than to begin when I arrived at their house for dinner.

My brother and I had both been invited to Mum and Dad's house that Friday night with strict instructions to dress nicely, because Mum was going to be cooking us one of her roast lamb dinners to mark the anniversary. So yeah, at the very least we knew we were guaranteed a delicious dinner. For this special occasion, I chose a long, royal purple dress with a deep v-neck and a little bit of back exposure. I felt really guilty when I bought it (for more than $200), but looking at it when I was wearing it that evening, I knew I'd done the right thing purchasing it. The neckline really showed off my cleavage without looking trashy, and the purple contrasted well with my dark and curly mermaid hair (you know, hair long enough to cover your boobs).

I got to the house at about 7:30 that night, apparently 15 minutes later than my brother, Matt. When I rang the doorbell, it seemed to take a little bit longer for Dad to open the door, and after I came inside, I found out why. He locked the deadbolt on the door behind me, something I'd never seen him do in all my years of living in that house. He explained that there had been a number of break-ins in their neighbourhood lately, so they weren't taking any chances. Sure, fine, whatever. I gave Dad a little kiss on the lips, wishing him a happy anniversary.

"Thanks honey, and thanks for coming tonight." He turned to face the rest of the house. "Rachel's here, everyone," he called out. I took a second to appreciate what good taste my Dad had in suits. I'm one of those girls who thinks that any guy can look great in a suit, but somehow Dad always manages to look exceptionally good, always choosing suits that compliment his lean physique. His blue silk tie really highlighted his deep blue eyes. Describing my Dad's look, he's got a fair few grey hairs, is quite built thanks to his job as a builder, and has the sweetest smile I've ever seen on a guy in his 50s. Unlike Mum, my brother and I, Dad is the only member of our family not of Italian descent, but he's so tanned from working outside all the time that he actually does look like he has a darkened complexion like the rest of us. And as I glanced at the family portrait hanging in the hall, I was randomly struck by how alike my brother and I looked to our parents.

Mum stepped out of the lounge room and said her hellos to me, and we exchanged quick cheek-pecks, and again I congratulated them. She looked really nice in her black skirt, stockings and forest green satiny shirt. Her olive skin was looking especially nice tonight, and I only pray that my skin looks as good as Mum's when I'm in my 50s. Mum playfully pulled Dad's face towards her and gave him a deep, passionate kiss on the mouth. They even opened their mouths a little. Now, I'm no prude, and my family have always been affectionate, but that was something else entirely. At the time, I just dismissed it as them being exceptionally ...celebratory for their anniversary, and then tried to get the image out of my head with little luck. My parents led me to the lounge room, where Matt was sitting in his favourite spot on the couch.

"Hey Rach," he greeted me, not getting up. I was pleasantly surprised to see Matt wearing something that wasn't a t-shirt and jeans; tonight he wore a grey/silver long-sleeve button up shirt and black dress pants. Sure, his hair was still shaggy thanks to the same dark curls as I'm blessed/cursed with, but somehow it worked, I don't know why. Maybe because that was the best way I could still tell that this dressy and stylish 27 year old was still my crazy older brother.

We all sat down while we waited for dinner, which only had about 20 more minutes in the oven, and what we discussed isn't especially relevant or interesting - the weather, how everyone's work had been going, y'know, all that awkward chit-chat you're cursed with at the start of any family gathering. The meal itself was fantastic. Mum's a natural when it comes to cooking baked meals, and that night she'd outdone herself. The vegetables were cooked to perfection, and the lamb was well-done (as I like it) but still moist and tender. The conversations over dinner were much more relaxed and light-hearted, thankfully. We'd been sitting and chatting at the dining room table for about 10 minutes when Dad spoke up.

"Now, kids, I'm not sure when your mother had planned on mentioning this, but I'm sick of waiting. No offence, my love." Mum jokingly rolled her eyes, and Dad continued. "So, as you're both aware, tonight is our 30th anniversary, and in addition to this wonderful meal that your Mum cooked, we both had one more way to kind of say 'Thank you and we love you.'"

Matt and I exchanged looks that were a cross between confused, intrigued and anxious.

Dad continued. "We were wanting to do something really special, and it might seem a bit strange at first, but please, just hear us out." I noticed that his hands had started to tremble a little, a very rare sight with my father. "We thought that the perfect way to celebrate tonight would be to, to have sex ...as a family."

I can't even remember breathing for the next few minutes. It was so quiet you could hear the grass growing outside before Matt broke the silence.

"Ha! Good one, Dad. Christ, you had me going there."

"It's not a joke, Matthew," Mum replied. "Look, we've always been a fairly open family, right? We never hid our love and affection from you. And I think that's made us a closer family, and it's made you kids a lot more open about sex than a lot of other people your age." She paused, like someone who's forgotten their line in a play. They'd clearly rehearsed this. "What's the one thing we've always told you about sex? Sex is the ultimate expression of love between people. Tonight, this was our idea to show both of you just how much we love you, and that we're so happy we're still so close to you after all these years."

Honestly, I think my soul had left my body by this point. I could hear everything they were saying, but they sounded miles away, and I could almost see myself watching this scene unfolding as I floated away to somewhere less insane.

"That- that actually makes a lot of sense. Strange as it is to admit," Matt confessed. "And it might just be because I haven't had a girlfriend in almost a month, but, uh, yeah, you guys have sold me on the idea. Never thought I'd say that, but yeah, it sounds like the perfect way to spend tonight."

That brought me back down, fast. "What? Jesus, Matt, you can't be serious!

He nodded; he was serious.

"This is just... just beyond messed up, you guys. You're talking about having sex with your own family members, like it's a sensible alternative to going out to a French restaurant! What the fuck is wrong with everyone?!" I tried to keep my voice down, but all the blood rushing to my impossibly red face made it impossible to keep my emotions in check. I wanted nothing more than to run out of the house, hop into my car and cut my family out of my life, but knew that was impossible. That goddamn deadbolt on the front door...never have I felt more trapped than I did at that moment. Recent break-ins, my ass. They knew I was going to act like this and so they were keeping me held hostage until I had sex with them.

"Rachel, honey, you're talking like we haven't given this any thought at all." Dad tried calming me down. "Your mother and I have been looking at the pros and cons for months now, really thinking this over. Believe me, it wasn't an easy decision, but it's the one that meant most to us."

"Honestly, darling, not even we know where this idea came from," Mum admitted. "We both kind of danced around bringing it up with the other one, and when it all finally came out, it felt like - what's the word? - serendipity or something. It was like we knew it was meant to be. I don't mind telling you, we had some, um, pretty intense relations once we'd talked about it with each other."

"Great, that's what I need to hear, more talk about you two thinking disgusting thoughts about me and my brother."

"Okay, so that probably wasn't the best thing to mention right now," she conceded. "Look, let's just, the two of us, go to the study and talk about this privately, all right? The boys can clean the table, please?" She looked to Dad, who nodded his willful agreement. Mum headed to the study, not bothering to check whether or not I was moving.

***

As Matthew and Dad started gathering up all the plates, I sighed loudly and wearily walked to the study, closing the door behind me. Mum was in the big chair, and motioned for me to have a seat in the crappy chair we kept in there for some unknown reason.

"I'm sorry you feel this way, Rachel, I really do. Obviously your father and I disagree with you; we truly think that sex is the perfect way to show you and Matthew our appreciation for everything you've done as members of this family. That said, I do want to stress that nobody wants you to do anything that would make you uncomfortable, or anything that you don't want to do. I've already told your father that I won't be doing any lesbian stuff, or anal or anything like that, and I bet that you probably don't want to either. And I know your dad doesn't want to do anything with your brother, so you don't have to be worried about that."

I pretended to mull over what Mum was trying to say, then offered my incredibly tactful rebuttal.

"Fine, how about this: I don't want to be part of some fucking incest orgy. Did you honestly think it was a matter of whether or not I'd have to do 'lesbian stuff'? You're still my parents, and Matt's still my brother. Jesus, why can't you understand why I'm saying no?"

"I do understand, Rachel, I really do. If your grandparents had tried something like this with me, I probably would have left the state. But I'm not my mother, and this family is nothing like my family; we all truly love each other. Don't we?" Not a rhetorical question.

Despite everything, I couldn't bring myself to deny that. "Yeah," I sighed. "Especially before this talk of orgies."

"I'm ignoring that for now. But you love all of us, just as we really do love you. Not meaning to repeat myself, but you do believe what we do, about sex being the truest and purest expression of love?"

"I guess. Yeah, sure, I do think that. It's just-"

"Rachel, I'm only going to say this once, so you need to listen to me, okay? Without you and your brother, I don't think that this marriage would have lasted. I'm not going to go into all the reasons, but it essentially amounts to your Dad and I getting married too young and basing our relationship entirely on the physical attraction. We didn't really know each other properly, and I'd say another year without kids and we would have divorced. But then I had little Matthew, and things started looking up once again. Then we had you soon after, and our world seemed so perfect once again.

"So, to your father and I, the only way we could truly celebrate our 30 years together would be to share every aspect of our relationship with the most beautiful, amazing, special and loved people in our lives: You and Matthew. And this time, you definitely can't say we're rushing into the physical side of things, because we waited 27 years before doing anything like this.

"Also, I've only got one more thing to say on the matter, then I'm going to leave you alone, okay? All I ask is that you give this idea of ours a try, and if you honestly hate it, you can leave. Forever. You never have to speak to any of us again. That's how strongly I believe this is the right move for our family: I'm willing to lose my only daughter forever if she doesn't feel closer to us after having sex."

Once again, I had no words. Mum's words definitely felt a lot less rehearsed now; what she told me sounded more real and honest than anything else I'd heard all night. "Look, I'll think about it, okay? I mean, I'll seriously think about it. Just, I need to go to the toilet. Hopefully it's not deadbolted."

"What was that?"

"Nothing, just saying how I felt trapped here when Dad locked the deadbolt on the front door when I got here. And how there'd better not be one on the toilet door, that's all."

"If there's one thing you inherited from your father, Rachel, it's his sarcasm. But no, there's no deadbolt on the damn toilet, and there really have been break-ins lately: Tony and Roberta Black had their car stolen about a week ago. Your Dad locking the door had nothing to do with our plans for tonight. Anyway, go to the toilet. We'll be around."

I was almost through the doorway when Mum said my name.

"Yes?"

"I love you." Genuine.

"I love you too, Mum." I have no idea whether or not I sounded genuine; at that point I couldn't care less.

***

After I peed, I washed my hands in the bathroom and made eye contact with myself in the mirror. The evening's events swirled around in my mind as I tried to process everything that had occurred. At least my dress still looked good. Irrelevant and vain, Rachel. Focus on your family. Why are they all so on board with the idea? Why was I somehow the odd one out for not wanting to commit incest, for fuck's sake? Did I look like the kind of girl who would willingly have sex with her brother and her father? Is there only one kind of girl who would do that? Or would there be dozens of types of girls who perform all sorts of taboo acts, all for different reasons?

Did Dad look like the kind of man who would have sex with his daughter? Did Matt look like the kind of guy who would have sex with his mother and sister? Did Mum look like the kind of woman who would have sex with her son? The answer, of course, was no. Nobody "looks like" they would have sex with a certain type of person, you idiot. And there's no one "type" of person who would commit such a taboo act any more than there's one "type" of person who drinks or smokes or does drugs or has sex with strangers. And what they were proposing was a lot less dangerous than any of those; at least I knew these people.

Jesus, Rachel, did you honestly just compare this favourably to one night stands and binge drinking? Apparently, yes, I did. And remember, Mum did give you the option of cutting yourself off from them if you didn't like it. Plus, you're single so you wouldn't be cheating on anyone, and you wouldn't be ruining any marriages, since both Mum and Dad want this thing to happen...

"Oh fuck," I muttered to my reflection. Without even realising it, apparently I had talked myself into fucking my family. I quickly dried my trembling hands and returned to my family, who were appropriately gathered in the family room, evidently anxious for my decision. Dad was in his favourite armchair that faces the TV, Mum was in the other single-seater that faced at an angle between the TV and the three-seater, where Matt was sitting on the end. "So, uh, I've thought about it, and..." I sighed. "I don't know why, but I'm willing to at least try to go along with this insanity."

Mum sighed with relief. Dad smiled broadly and assured me I'd made the right decision, and that I wouldn't regret it. Matt thrust his fist in the air like Bender in The Breakfast Club and cheered. At least he had a sense of humour about the situation. Later, he told me that he and Dad had placed bets as to whether I would come back, or escape through the bathroom window. I took my seat on the other end of the lounge closer to Dad's chair, leaving an empty seat between Matt and I.

"So, before we do anything else," Dad said once everybody had gotten over the shock of my return, "we need to discuss some pretty important things, namely contraception and STDs. I know your mother and I are clear, but you kids, well... you're from a different generation, so if you could please tell us: Do we need to be worried or take any precautions?"

For once in my life, I decided to answer first. "No, I'm- I'm clean, and I've been on the pill since I was 15, as I'm sure everyone knows. Matt?"

"No, I'm all good, got tested a month ago, got the all clear down there." Matt was a bit of a man-whore, but it was a relief to know that he wasn't stupid about his sluttiness.

"Great, I'm proud to hear you're both responsible in that regard," Dad beamed. I never would've thought that our sex life could bring my Dad such pride. "Anyway, your mother's too embarrassed to admit this, but I think it's important-"

"Oh, Thomas, don't-" Mum pleaded.

"Michelle, it needs to be said. Your Mum has reached menopause, so there's no risk of pregnancies here, so, uh ...go nuts, I guess, Matthew." Mum was mortified, hiding her face in her hands.

Matt was clearly unprepared to hear Dad encouraging him to cum inside Mum, but who can blame him? Perhaps the full reality of what was soon happening hadn't quite hit him before that moment. "Thanks. I'll, um, take that into consideration."

Dad broke the incredibly awkward silence, forever a man with a plan. "As for what happens next, your mother and I hadn't exactly talked that far ahead, but if I could make a suggestion?" Mum nodded, I shrugged, and Matt gave the thumbs up. "If it's okay with the kids, I think it'd make sense for you and I to start together, Michelle, and then we swap partners after some point?"

"Sure thing, honey. Sounds like a plan to me."

Dad had a point. "Well, it is your anniversary," I said. God, I certainly hoped I'd loosen up once we'd actually started. Like with everything else in life, the beginning of a family orgy is the most difficult part.

"So I guess it's you and me, Rach. And can I just say quickly, you look fucking incredible in that dress." Matt had such a beautiful way with words.

"Do I?" Damn it, I could feel my face burning up once again; I've never been comfortable taking compliments. "Thanks, Matt. And you really do look great in that shirt; who'd've thought you'd scrub up so nicely?" I winked at him. Hey, I never said I was the world's best flirt, either. He laughed, somehow impressed by my embarrassingly awful attempt at flattery.

Mum made her way over to Dad and, sitting sideways in his lap, my parents officially kicked off their anniversary party. They kissed, starting off relatively chaste, opening their mouths a little. Over time, they got more and more into it; soon their mouths were open wide, and their tongues were dancing in each other's mouth. Matt and I stared at them. I don't know what was going through his mind, but I was in shock. At this point in my life, I'd never even seen porn, let alone watched two people actually ramping up, getting ready to have sex. So watching my parents making out with such passion, Dad groping Mum's butt and boobs, was unlike anything I'd ever imagined. I wouldn't describe it as a turn on exactly, but at any rate I was transfixed.

My brother and I sat in silence as we watched Dad unbutton Mum's top and throw it to the floor while never removing his lips from hers. Mum followed suit, undoing Dad's tie and shirt, then her own bra. Once Mum threw her black, lacy bra onto the ground, I must confess I was surprised by how nice her breasts were for a woman in her mid-50s, who'd breastfed two kids. They were still quite springy, and not very saggy at all.

I felt movement on the lounge as Matt shifted over towards me and removed his shoes and socks. "Nervous as I am, I guess we should probably shouldn't just sit here and watch our parents fucking, huh?" he proposed.

It took me a moment to actually register what Matt was proposing. "Oh, right. Yeah, I guess not. Sorry, I just... I have no idea how to act in this sort of situation, sorry."

"Rach, it's my first time doing anything like this either, so don't worry, I'm with you - this is the last thing I thought I'd be doing tonight. But, how about a shoulder rub? You look so fucking tense I'm worried your heart's going to give out."