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She rushed over to the window and saw a crowd of hookers converging over something.
"Oh my God."
She quickly put on her dress and ran out on the street as fast as she could. I followed on her heels. The crowd of hookers seemed to be attacking something. Monica quickly pushed aside some of them and made her way to the center of the group. After forcefully removing the last few, she saw a bleeding pastor. The blood softly dripped from his beard onto the pavement.
He had been repeatedly beaten and was unconscious. The paranoia was real.
"Quick, call 911." she said in my direction.
My plan had worked too well and there was collateral damage. Innocent bystanders were getting hurt.
There was really nothing that went right for me.
- COMMENTS
Karenasover 11 years agoI love the details here about the sick fan page and also the paranoia leading to a beating. Nice touches that add verisimilitude.
persorosaabout 12 years agoAnother great chapter. A few small grammar things that fell through but nothing glaring.
I am going to go back and read the 1st Ch because there is one thing I'm having trouble with but before I say it I want to see if I missed it in the beginning.
Can't wait to see what's next.
KatieTayover 12 years agoNo... No.... No No No No....
You did the apostrophe mistake! Twice!
:(
Also, I think you put the thought about two girls to make a point in unnecessary quote marks. Since he's thinking it, and not saying it aloud or to anyone else, it can do without the quote marks.
Still an excellent read. But please don't perpetuate the horror of the "it's" mistake...
