Appointment With A Stranger

Actually movement on my account of any description was extremely difficult, everywhere I looked, all I could see were people's legs and feet.

"I do when it's to catch my wife with her lover." I replied. I was getting good at those comebacks.

"That's rubbish Mike, you know I'm over here on a business trip!"

"Avril, your business trip was to Houston, this is bleeding Florida! Neither you nor your company has any business here in Miami. You had your meeting in Houston and then you flew here with golden bollocks, wherever he's got to." There were so many of Paul's people milling around that I'd lost sight of Holly's husband for the moment. "And you've spent the last two nights doing the horizontal tango with the bugger in room 643."

"642 lover, 643 is our room." Holly's voice corrected me from somewhere.

"Yeah sorry, room 642, would you like to see the tapes, Avril?" I asked.

I was pushing my luck here; I had no idea whether Holly had any tapes from this particular trip, but I knew that she had many of them from their previous trysts. I figured that Avril wouldn't actually want to see them.

Avril just sat there on the floor staring back at me. I must admit that it was the first time I'd ever seen the woman speechless.

No that's a lie, I remember the first time I bedded her, before we were married. By the time I'd finished with her, she was lying there speechless; I've always assumed that I'd shagged all the chat out of her. Well, it couldn't have been a disappointment to her, she came back for more the following evening and she married me eventually. More's the pity!

Suddenly hands were helping us to our feet and the next thing I was really aware of – besides Holly having wrapped her arm around my waist again – was Paul saying, "Morgan Ardent you are served." And he handed Holly's rather dishevelled looking husband, an envelope. I wondered what I'd missed for Morgan to have become that dishevelled looking.

Then Paul promptly did the same to Avril. Although our British divorce petitions don't really have to be presented as formally as the Yanks do it, I could have sent it by registered post I believe. Holly and I just thought it would add to the occasion a little, to have it done formally and at the same time as papers were served on her husband.

Then the two guys with Holly and Morgan – who along with the rest of their party had followed the two lovers over - were served with papers. Holly had taken care of all that, Avril and Morgan worked for an American Company so we were both suing them in the US courts for turning a blind eye to the couple's goings on.

Mind, as their bosses who the papers were served on had their girlfriends with them as well; I think the bloody company must have turned a blind eye to everything. Finally Paul served Morgan Ardent with an alienation of affection suite, Holly's legal people had filed in the American courts on my behalf. It has been years since anyone successfully pulled one of those off in the UK.

Just as suddenly as the whole thing had started, it was over. I really have no idea where - or when - Avril disappeared. Holly said she had been lead away crying by one of her boss's bits of stuff, but I never saw the going of her. I did watch Holly's husband being led away by the two guys though. Mind, not before he gave me a look that I believe was suppose to turn me to stone.

"So what happens now?" I asked Holly.

"We dance!" She replied with a grin and dragged me off towards the dance floor again.

The rest of the evening turned into a bit of a party. When we returned to the table Paul and Della sort-of introduced us to all their police friends, but didn't really go into details; they all knew who we were anyway.

Della explained to me when I was dancing with her, that as they had hoped, all those police badges had prevented Holly's old man from taking a swing at anyone. Mind you, from the state he was in when I last saw him, I had to wonder if he took a swing at anyone else whilst I was on the floor with Avril.

Some of the women in the party were police officers as well and I had a fascinating conversation with one of them when I danced with her later. She told me that she'd been shot sorting out a domestic dispute a few years before.

"I blew his bleeding balls off!" she replied when I asked her what had happened. "We're taught that once you are forced to fire your weapon, you empty the chamber. No point in risking them getting a second shot off.

"Where did he shoot you?" I asked.

"Would you believe in the tit, I've had to have my nipple rebuilt."

"Christ, lucky it never killed you." I commented. Thinking that if the bullet hit her breast it had to have been very near her heart.

"Damn thing hit my badge first and got deflected across my breast. I'm not sure if the damned badge saved my life or made things worse."

"Christ what did your husband say about it?"

"Not much, he got shot in the ass himself a few years back, still got the bullet in him; they retired him on the strength of it."

"I bet he weren't happy about that."

"No, Paul's happy enough, he's qualified as an attorney now, but he has more fun doing all this PI stuff."

"Paul's your husband, then who's Della?" I had assumed that Della was Paul's wife; I have no idea why.

"My sister. She's an ex-cop as well, threw it in when she had her first child."

I never did get up the courage to ask, under what circumstances Paul got shot in the jacksie.

I discovered that American cops like a bevvy or two. A bit disconcerting when they all seemed to have their guns with them. Not that they waved them around or anything.

I have no idea what time the party broke up, I'm afraid I'd had a bevvy or two too many myself.

But I do remember a disappointing conversation we overheard in the lift though. One of the hotel staff was telling a couple how lucky they were, the hotel had been full, but for some reason the couple in 642 suddenly checked out. The cleaning staff were still in room 642 when Holly, Paul, Della and I went into 643.

"Well that takes the rest of the fun out of the evening." Holly said. "I was looking forward to seeing their faces when we walked out of this suite together in the morning."

"Maybe not such a bad thing really, it might have given their lawyers a lever in court." Paul commented.

"Paul, I've got enough on what those two have been getting up to in the last six months to get two divorces. Besides I've got the pre-nup that my father insisted on. He never did think much of Morgan."

"Yeah but what about Mike here, they don't have pre-nuptial agreements over in the UK."

"I'm screwed anyway, Paul. My solicitor reckons it'll be a fifty-fifty split. The only light in the sky is that Avril earns more than I do." I told them.

"She did, I think some heads are going to roll in that company, and Morgan and Avril will be at the top of the list; my uncle's a big share holder and he's on the case already." Holly informed us. "I had trouble stopping him from jumping the gun or we'd have missed out on the fun tonight."

"Not that much happened really, there wasn't much in the way of fireworks. Rather a lot of expense on your part Holly, for something that could have been done at home." I said, voicing my thoughts.

"Ah now, Mike, the look on Morgan's face when you said he'd been bedding your wife was a classic. He had no idea who you were."

"Did I say that?"

"No, not in so many words, you're too much of a gentleman. But I did, the look on Morgan's face when he realised that he hadn't caught me, I, or rather we, had caught them, was something to behold. And then Avril came crashing through like a line backer on a home run. Funniest thing I've seen in a long time." Holly said and laughed out loud.

"Holly, I'm not much up on American sports, but I thought line backers played American Football and they score home runs in Baseball." I pointed out.

"Ah, we have something else in common, I've never been a sports fan either." Holly replied.

"I think we've all noticed, Holly." Della commented.

We all chatted on about nothing in particular for god knows how long, but eventually we got to bed.

Oh, I'd better point out that room 643 was a suite, I had one bedroom and Holly had the other. When we went to bed, Paul and Della were sitting in the lounge; when we got up in the morning Mona – Paul's wife - had replaced Della; who I assume had gone home to her children.

Apparently Paul was an officer of the court – I have no idea what that means. But I gathered that his word would be taken almost as gospel by the American courts. I.e. he could swear that Holly and I had not spent the night in the same bed together. The original plan was for us to confront Morgan and Avril again in the morning when they left their hotel room. Them doing a runner had kicked that one into touch.

"So Mike what's your plan now?" Holly asked over breakfast.

"Not sure, go home and lick my wounds, I suppose." I replied.

"Well the lovers have flown the coop, why don't you and I fly out to Vegas for a few days before you go home."

"Nice idea, Holly, but I'm not looking forward to the flight back to the UK as it is. I'm sorry, but adding another flight to Los Vegas isn't my idea of a good time."

Holly sat there quite obviously thinking for a few moments, "Flying upsets you that much does it? Okay, alternative idea; a close friend of mine has a house on the Bahamas, why don't we go over there for a few days? Don't worry we can go by boat and you won't even have to risk my driving."

I had to think about that one, but not for very long. After having travelled all the way across the Atlantic, it would be silly of me to fly straight back to the UK; considering I had almost two weeks of my summer holiday left. I'd have to get home before too long because there was sure to be a real old ding-dong with Avril when she got home. The house was already up for sale and I'd moved cash around all over the place to prevent her draining all the joint accounts.

Mind you, my solicitor had overseen all the changes I'd made; I was going to get screwed anyway, his job was to stop me finishing up broke.

"Yeah why not? A nice cruise on a ferry should be fun. But can you just do that, turn up at your friends place without an invite?"

"Sure, I've got a standing invitation there. I don't visit them as much as I should really."

"But what about dragging me along?"

"Oh they're bound to like you more than they did Morgan; they never did think much of him." Holly replied with a grin.

Ferry did I say? The taxi dropped us off at what I thought was a rather swish Cabin cruiser or even a private yacht. It turned out to be some kind of a charter fishing boat and she had an impressive turn of speed on her. During the trip over to the Bahamas Holly spent most of her time sun bathing on the foredeck in a tiny bikini. I spent most of my time on the flying bridge with the captain supposedly showing me how to drive the boat, whilst in fact we were ogling Holly's shapely body along with the other crewmember.

"Daddy!" Holly said as she threw her arms around an old guy who met us at the quay.

"This is Mike, it was his wife Morgan has been playing with." Holly said introducing us.

"Hi son." He said shaking my hand, and then to Holly. "I told you, you could never trust that little shit in the first place. But no, you always did think you knew best. Right come on, Mike, let's get you back to the house and into some appropriate attire."

I gathered that my business suit wasn't considered appropriate clothing for the Bahamas.

At the house – read large rambling structure that had little resemblance to any house I'd been in before - I met Holly's mother, who greeted me like a long lost son. Embarrassing for my restrained English nature. Although things got a little formal when I was shown to my room by Holly's father. Let's just say he made sure that I understood where my room was! And it was there he and his wife expected me to sleep. You get the idea!

The next four days were really enjoyable. When Holly and I weren't sun bathing or swimming in her father's pool, I was either fishing from the same boat that had ferried us over along with Holly's father. Or we were at numerous cocktail parties in the evenings. At a couple of these, Holly danced with me, but she was somewhat more chaste than she had been that first night in that Miami Hotel.

On the last evening before we left, somehow Holly and I finished up taking a late moonlight walk along the shore. We weren't in each other's arms or anything, but she was holding my arm.

We had been talking about how upset I was that the divorce was going to cost me the house that I'd spent so many years redesigning to my... well Avril's and my idea of what a home should be. Although Avril had always allowed me to do what I wished with the place, Avril just choosing the colour schemes and that sort of thing. The extension and even the kitchen and bathrooms had always been to my plan, as was my garage come workshop; boy was I going to miss that workshop.

"Mike, I want to apologise?" Holly suddenly said.

"Apologise for what, Holly?"

"Well, that first evening in Miami; I was a little forward."

"Holly, we were both very nervous about what was going to happen. I think we both drank a little more than we should have and said things we shouldn't have done. It served to cover our nervousness that's all we have to worry about."

"I know, but I wouldn't like for you to think I'd flirt with anyone like that."

"Damn, don't be silly, girl, I understand exactly. I should apologise to you, I didn't really have myself under the control I should have had."

"So I noticed, big boy." She replied, with another of those little enchanting giggles of hers. "Anyway, we aren't the sort of people who would give into our base instincts like Morgan and Avril did, are we?"

"Quite definitely not, Holly. We've spent almost five days together and since that first evening we haven't so much as kissed each other."

"Why do you think that is?"

"I'm not sure really. You're a very attractive woman and I enjoyed being your official lipstick smudger the other night. But, we have to take into account, that in a way we are both on what you might call the rebound. How many relationships have you ever known that have lasted when they started under those circumstances?"

"Yeah I've got to admit that usually they do lead to heartache for everyone in the end." Holly said quietly.

"Besides we are still both married Holly, even if our spouses seem to have overlooked that fact."

"Yeah you're right, we're above that kind of behaviour aren't we?"

"Regretfully!" I replied.

"Does that mean you can't smudge my lipstick just once before you go?"

"Holly, I'm damned sure I told you, that I'd gladly apply for the full time position as your lipstick smudger.

Okay I spent the next half hour or so seeing how smudged I could make Holly's lipstick. Only I think Holly was trying to find out whether I still had my tonsils, using her tongue as a probe.

By the time we joined her parents back at the house though, we were on best good friends' behaviour.

The following day the same boat took us back to the mainland at what seemed an even faster speed than it had transported us out at. Then Holly came with me to the airport and saw me off on my return flight to the UK.

Yeah okay, I smudged Holly's lipstick again before I boarded the flight.

Avril was waiting for me when I eventually got back to the house. Surprisingly there wasn't very much in the way of fireworks.

"Hi, I'm sorry, Mike; I've made a real mess of things haven't I?" A very subdued looking Avril said, when I found her sitting in the kitchen.

"I just can't understand why, Avril. I thought we had a good thing going here."

"We did, Mike, I just got carried away with my job. I'm sorry, it all went to my head. I really didn't intend to cheat on you or anything. Christ Mike, I'm still in love with you."

"You are; so what sort of feelings do you have for him then?"

"Shit, please don't ask, he flattered and seduced me; I behaved like a silly little schoolgirl. Did you... you know, with his wife?"

"Avril!" was all I needed to say.

"Shit, I might have guessed you wouldn't. Now you're going to tell me that there's no chance for us, aren't you?"

"You know me better than I know myself, Avril."

"When do you want me to move out, or are you going?"

"Providing you don't bring any of your lovers back here Avril, we can both live here until the house is sold; that should give us both time to find somewhere half decent to live."

"The divorce?"

"I'm prepared to change the grounds to irreconcilable differences, providing we can come to an amicable agreement on the finances. That should allow us to get a quickie divorce."

"Get the papers and show me where to sign, Mike. I messed it all up so I wont give you any more hassle." Avril said with a resigned tone to her voice.

That was it really; the divorce went through in a matter of months. The house didn't take that long to sell, it had been on the market for nearly two months when an estate agent guy turned up and bought it on behalf of a client of his.

Weird fellow never struck me as the estate agent type. Anyway we never even saw the buyers or learnt their name. After a lot of negotiation he even bought almost all of the furniture. I was moving into a rented furnished place and Avril, after getting the sack from her employer, suddenly found herself being head hunted by another American company. She left England for California before the divorce was final.

I don't know, maybe two months after the decree nisi, I received a telephone call from the agent of the people who'd bought our house.

"It seems my client is having some trouble understanding the central heating system's controls Mr Crosby. We were wondering whether you could kindly call round this evening and explain how to set it to them." He asked.

"I can't see why they're having any problems, it is a fairly standard system. But then again, that damned electronic timer is a bit of a sod to get your head around. Yeah, tell them I'll call round on my way home from work this evening and see if I can help. What's their name by the way?" I asked.

"Thanks Mr Crosby, I'll tell them to expect you around half six then, goodbye!" He replied, then the line went dead.

"That's odd!" I can remember thinking, "How the hell did he know I'd get there at half past six. That was the time I had always got home from work when I lived there. And the bugger had hung-up without giving me their name.

The garden looked almost the same when I swung into the drive. That's if you ignored the little sign proudly telling everyone that the new householder used a certain local gardening company to mow the lawns etc.

There were no cars in the drive so I parked in my old spot. It was with a heavy heart that I walked up to the front door and pressed the bell.

It's very strange you know, returning to a house where you used to live and finding yourself ringing the doorbell instead of just putting your key in the lock and letting yourself in.

"Who is it?" A voice called from behind the closed door.

"Mike Crosby." I called back. "I've come to explain the heating system."

"I heard all the locks and bolts I'd fitted to that door with my own hands being slid back and undone. Crike's, most of them were for when we went to bed or left the house empty, I'd never expected anyone would use them all the time.

"Eventually the door opened and a young woman of about eighteen, with a very thick East European accent opened the door and bid me enter.

"The mistress is waiting in the lounge." The young woman said very precisely, almost as if she'd been rehearsing the line. Then she started giggling and ran off towards the Kitchen.