April and September

That little voice said "Now, we plan."

"Okay. What if she just wants coffee?" I thought.

"Unlikely. She passes one on the corner of Davis and Main, and some of the best ones are within a block or two of where she's staying. She doesn't need you to find them," said the voice.

"Hmmm. More of my wit and wisdom then?"

"She almost certainly wants to talk, but she seems to want to get you alone and on neutral ground. She will use this time to see where she wants to go with this."

"And where will she want to go with this?" I wondered.

"Normally I give you 90% odds that this will end up with you and her doing dinner and dropping her back home with a peck on the cheek, then after a repeat performance things might go farther, but she doesn't have time for that. She packs up and moves on tomorrow night. The odds of you two winding up the in bed tomorrow are low, but possible."

"Sex? Dear gods, that's been a while." I exclaimed. "How low are these odds?"

"Given the age difference and other factors, between 10-25%. Low, but they should be considered."

"Shit! Condoms!" I haven't used them in years, with the vasectomy and all. I probably should have used them all the time, considering why the ex is an ex.

"You got lucky there. April is a musician. She probably gets around," the voice said.

"Okay condoms are on the list." I'll just drop by Safe way on the way out. "Anything else I'm missing?"

"Nope. You'll do fine. Just be yourself and stay in control."

I think he was making fun of me.

---

I arrived at Safeway at 9:15 to find that the normally conservative townsfolk apparently had a collective orgy last night. The condom rack was picked pretty clean. Other than the Godzilla condoms, there was only Trojan ribbed with spermicide (not necessary all things considered, and April could be allergic to the stuff) and 1 box of Trojan thin lubricated. Seemed like a no-brainer to me.

Some personal details: I have an odd penis. It's not thicker than average, except at the head, but it's quite long. No, I'm not a card-carrying member or the Hung Jury, but I am a bit over 10 inches when completely erect. This makes the fit of condoms... interesting. It has also stopped sex cold on more than one occasion when I collided with my ex wife's cervix. She swore I was trying to introduce her cervix to her tonsils. The fight that caused was epic. I have learned to be a gentle lover.

In the checkout, I tried to go to the male cashier, but a lady known to gossip opened her register and offered to help me. As I paid for my rubbers, I could see the flush and twinkle in her eye. The town would know if I got lucky before I did.

At the car I checked my watch. It was only 9:35, I had plenty of time. I put one condom in the glove compartment and the other two in my pocket.

In spite of it all, I got there early. It was 9:45 and I was parked in front of the alpine cottage rental where the sisters were staying. Rather than sit in the hot car, I decided to slowly walk around the back and up the stairs, showing up fashionably early.

I got about half way up the long stairway when I heard two of the sisters having an animated discussion. I could tell by the voices it was May and April.

"You aren't getting cold feet, are you?"

"No, I just hope he forgets or something."

"You're scared!" I could tell by context that this was May, though their voices were practically identical. I stopped on the stairs and considered going back to the car for a minute or two.

"Yeah. I am. He's so genuine and sweet, I'm scared of screwing this up."

"You WILL screw this up if you don't finish getting ready. He'll be here in about 5 minutes if he's on time. He seems the punctual type."

"Okay, but I don't know it this is such a good idea. I mean, I really thought we had a connection, but now I'm not so sure. Maybe..."

May cut her off. "If you don't do him, I will!"

I jolted with that statement. "Okay, time to leave for a bit," I thought. "It seems that my odds have improved, but why?"

As I turned to sneak back down the stairs, I saw Faye closing the garden gate and walking straight for me with an armload of groceries.

"Shit," I hissed quietly.

Turning to go back up the stairs, I walked up with a heavy foot so they'd know I was coming. Faye arrived on the second floor landing just as I knocked. She walked in the door ahead of me, keys in her teeth, gestured for me to come in and went in the kitchen to put the purchases away.

"Did she see me listening? Oh crap, if she did, she'll think I was eavesdropping!" I thought.

May looked me up and down. "April will be ready in a moment. Care to sit and chat?"

"Oh boy. Here we go," I thought as I nodded and took a seat.

"April is my baby sister. She's the youngest, but that doesn't mean what it usually does. She wasn't spoiled, rather the opposite. I am kind of protective of her... we all are."

"I can understand that," I said. "Would you mind if I ask something personal? It's about April. If you feel you can't answer or feel I'm prying, just tell me so and I'll drop it."

"Ask away," May said with a quizzical cant of her head.

"April mentioned an ex-fiancée who said some very hurtful things to her. Personally, I'd like to beat him senseless for what he said to her, but there's usually a lot more to the story than what either side knows. What exactly happened?"

"Well, first of all I didn't tell you, alright?"

After I nodded she continued. "Johnny was an okay sort, but one of those guys who always is looking for a shortcut to get ahead. Everything was fine with them at first, though none of us liked him. About six months into the engagement he started to get distant. When she asked him about it, he blew up and told her she was ugly and deformed."

"Then what happened?" I asked.

"Almost immediately after the wedding was called off, Johnny was seen with another girl. One from a rich family. Apparently, he needed to break off the engagement with April in order to woo the other girl. They married 6 months later."

"Shotgun wedding?" I asked.

"Nope. He just wanted to get in the will. She's a real piece of work too. Are you ready for the funny part?"

"There's a funny side to this?" I growled... I was loosing my sense of humor and really getting pissed off at this Johnny. Given half a chance I was going to have his guts for garters.

"Oh yes. Three months after the wedding, the old man kicks the bucket. It turns out that not only wasn't there any inheritance, but the family was mortgaged to the eyeballs to appear rich. They even cashed out the geezer's life insurance policy to pay for the wedding, gifts, and honeymoon."

"...and Johnny inherited the debt!" we finished in chorus.

I smiled with a terminal case of schadenfreude. "Couldn't have happened to a nicer guy," I observed. "Karma's a bitch sometimes."

"There's more!" she crowed. "Both families are devoutly Catholic... real old school. They can't divorce!" May shot me a feral grin and we started to snicker. Now I wanted Johnny to live a long, long time.

"To the pain," I thought.

We were still laughing tears when April stepped out of the bedroom. She was wearing jeans and a knit shirt which hugged her feminine curves just right.

"I hope we don't have to drive far," I thought as I stood, glad my bits generally lined up right. "It's gonna be hell trying to keep my eyes on the road."

"Shall we?" I offered her my arm and she beamed.

---

"So, where are we going?" I asked as April closed her door.

"I'm the one who's new in town. Shouldn't I ask that question?" she countered.

"Okay... I'll tell you what. You tell me the category of activity, food, or whatever, and I'll make that happen. Fair?"

"Perfect," she said. "I would like a little something for breakfast and a good cup of coffee."

"I know just the place!" I said as I pulled out of the driveway. I snapped my little Dodge Neon Sport up to the speed limit, slowed briskly, and parked about a half block from her house. She saw we were in front of a little coffee shop.

"Here?" she giggled.

"Best in town, unless you want something like bacon and eggs."

"Cappuccino and a scone?" she queried.

"This is the place."

Standing in line we found the aroma heavenly. The Front Range Bagel Company made their own baked goods daily but it's not the place to go if you are in a rush. The line processed quickly enough, and there was only a sweet old lady in front of us. For once it was someone I didn't recognize. She seemed to be quite feeble.

As she ordered, she began to stammer and suddenly tipped over like a felled tree. On her way to the floor she struck her head on the counter, coffee bar, plant pot, and the ground. In an instant, my old military training kicked in.

"YOU!" I bellowed pointing at the clerk "Call 911 and tell them we need an ambulance. Possible stroke. MOVE!"

"YOU!" I pointed at the baker "Clean towels. NOW!"

I checked the lady for a pulse and breathing. Strong pulse. Fast. Breathing in deep gasps. "Ma'am, can you hear me?"

She whimpered. Good. It's a response. I covered her with my coat.

"Hon, an ambulance has been called. You just sit tight. Okay?"

"Sorry... didn't want to make a fuss," she said weakly.

"Sweetie, you picked a great place to do this. Help is on it's way and you are in good hands."

"Allstate," she said. I could see the corner of her mouth twitch in a weak smile. Memory and humor. Great sign.

The baker got there with a few towels, some dry and clean, some warm, wet, and smelling of bleach.

"Hon, I'm going to put some towels down to absorb some of the bleeding."

"I jus' want to stay down here for a spell," she croaked.

"No problem. I'd actually rather you stayed still until the ambulance gets here."

"I like that plan," she drawled. Texas accent?

"Where ya from hon?"

"Dallas."

"Really? I got friends in the Metromess. Arlington."

She smiled at the nickname. "You know, I think I know what I did wrong," she said. I could hear the sirens coming in a hurry.

What did you do wrong hon?" I thought she was going to say something like 'I took my blood pressure medication twice'.

"I was supposed to take my spills in a mattress showroom," she smiled and winced in pain.

I laughed at her joke and brushed the hair from her eye.

"Was there anything I missed on the way down?" she asked.

I smiled. "You missed the shop window, but that's about it." Awesome. It was probably just the altitude. It can hit people like a ton of bricks, especially if you just got here from somewhere much lower.

The ambulance pulled up just then.

"Hon, I'll be right back the ambulance is here."

"I ain't movin' much darlin', promise," she drawled.

"My god, she must have been a firecracker when she was younger!" I thought. I gave her shoulder a gentle squeeze and rose to talk with the EMTs.

"Hi Don," I said "I was first responder. Subject is an 80 year old woman collapsed eight minutes ago striking her head on several items on the way down. She has not been moved, nor has she attempted to get up. She is lucid and conversational with less than a 30 second loss of consciousness, if at all. Pulse is strong but rapid at about 110. Breathing was labored but has improved. She is bleeding from a few lacerations on face and scalp."

"Any history?" he asked looking up from the notes.

"No gots, I was just the next one in line. Don't know her. Take good care of her though, okay? She's a sweetie and a real trooper"

"Can do. You gonna be around later?" he asked.

"Shit, where's April?" I thought, my eyes scanning.

"Maybe. Don, I'm kinda busy today... Here's my card."

"Your cell number is on here somewhere?" he asked.

"Under emergency contact." I saw April waiting patiently in an overstuffed chair. She wasn't mad, just watching concerned. "If you need anything, call me on my cell."

"Okay, but I doubt I'll need to. She probably just needs to get some oxygen. We are over 7000 feet here. Any bets she was at sea level yesterday?"

"No bets. She's a Texan." The lady was on the gurney. Her face was beginning to swell shut. Broken nose at least, the poor dear.

"If that's all you need..." Don said as he started to shuffle toward the gurney.

"Gloves. Three pair please."

"Done." He handed me a handful of nitrile gloves.

"Mmmm... purple. My favorite," I chuckled as I put on a pair.

As she passed me on the gurney I walked along side. "Okay hon, this is where I give you over to our professionals. They'll take care of you." Someone handed me my coat.

"You sure? They look awful young," she said smiling more with her eyes than her poor face.

"Yes ma'am, I threatened them appropriately. They'll treat you right." She took my hand and squeezed it warmly.

Just before he closed the back doors of the ambulance, I heard Don say "Ma'am, you are no trouble at all. It's what we do."

I handed the cashier and baker the gloves and we started to clean up. She had bled quite a bit.

When we were done I walked over to April. "Are you still hungry?"

"Oh God yes, but let's take it to go. I want to see something besides the inside of a shop and theater. I want to see some wild places while I'm out here."

"No problem, what's your pleasure?" I asked as I gestured to the counter.

"He's already took my order, just tell the man what you want."

"...and it's on the house," the clerk interjected. Unexpected, but quite cool. Within 3 minutes we were back in the car with blueberry scones and large steaming drinks.

"I know the perfect place," I said.

---

Aiming the car out of town we sat in silence a while. Me in thoughts about the older lady, and her in her own head as well. It was April who broke the silence.

"Where did you learn to do that?" she asked out of the blue.

"The emergency medical stuff?"

"Yeah. That was really impressive. It's like you just switched gears. Military?"

"I was in the military, but I was a very different kind of soldier," I said.

"I take it that you were some kind of medic?"

"Sorta. I was Air Force Pararescue."

She cocked her head quizzically. "What's that? I never heard of those."

"There aren't that many of us PJ's out there. We're the guys who get other folks out of trouble. Search and recovery, field medicine, fast deployment. They train us for anything and like to give us all odd jobs... the stuff no one else thinks is possible," I said thinking of the unofficial PJ logo showing a caricature soldier with an assortment of equipment on. "Our motto is 'These things we do that others may live.'"

"So you were special forces then?"

"Kinda. We are considered special ops, but we use our powers for good," I said with a grin.

"That's funny!" she laughed. "Where are we going?

"About another quarter mile down this highway and a half mile down a side road there's some sandstone bluffs eroded by our constant wind A very cool place, especially on a sunny and calm day like today."

I slowed and signaled for a right turn.

"I see them! Wow, it looks like something from a western movie backdrop."

"Yeah, up close they're even better. Looking at this stuff you can almost see the fact that we'd be under water several million years ago. We're on the edge of the great inland sea."

"The sandstone is from the old sea floor and coast?" she asked.

I nodded as we stopped the car in the wide spot of the shoulder by a gate.

As she exited the car she observed the area. "The gate is chained. How are we going to get in? Should we get in?"

"I know the owners. Trust me." I said as I picked up a small bundle from the back seat.

"Lock it up?" She asked.

"No, don't bother. I don't even lock it in town."

I reached over the fence and unthreaded the bailing wire from around the chain looped around the gate and swung it open. As she walked through shaking her head, I closed the gate and threaded wire through the chain enough to hold.

"Life is much simpler out here, isn't it?"

"It is, but sometimes it gets dull."

"How about right now?" she asked with a twinkle in her eye.

"Anything but."

We walked along the path the cattle left for about a quarter mile until the sagebrush, pinions and junipers opened into a flat rocky plain. To the left the path led downward, then cut sharply to the right following the bottom edge of the sandstone bluff. Here I stopped under an ancient wind twisted pine. It was next to a sandstone outcropping the wind had shaped into a mushroom with a narrow base and broad flat top. Sitting a little lower than the outcropping, it was impossible to see from the road. I used this spot for meditating and just getting away from folks.

"How cool!" she noted. "Where to now?"

"How do you feel about climbing trees?"

"I'm a bit of a tomboy"

"Great, up you go," I gestured up the twisted pine showing her the branches which made for the rungs of a living ladder. "At the top, turn around so I can hand up our breakfast and a blanket to sit on." She climbed the tree getting to the top quite easily.

When she got my small bundle from the car she chuckled. "I wondered what this was."

As I climbed she removed the Velcro band, spread out the tightly packed and rolled blanket on the center of the rock. By the time I was at the top and on my feet, she was sitting facing me and spread out our picnic. Grinning like a kid at Christmas, she patted the spot next to her.

Once I got settled she handed me a scone, and suddenly got a stricken look on her face.

"Sweetie, what's wrong?"

"I, ummm... I can't remember which is which!" she gestured toward the identical tall Styrofoam cups with their steaming contents.

I laughed. "No big deal. You know how we carried then here? I'll be able to tell by scent."

"No... really???"

"Absolutely. First let me smell you. Just a little behind the ear."

"Okay," she said a bit unsure. Leaning close she allowed me to put my arms around her. When she leaned her head over to expose her neck, I put my nose behind her ear and sniffed deeply. She shivered as the cool air rushed past the little hairs on her neck. Without perfume she smelled heavenly.

Reluctantly releasing her from my arms, I began to sniff at the sides of the cups near the cap. First one then the other. The focused expression on my face evaporated into a grin. "Here. This one is yours."

She tried the beverage and beamed. "That was incredible. A little freaky... but amazing! How did you do that? Do you really have that sensitive of a nose?"

"No sweetie. You had a cappuccino, and I had chai," I chuckled. "Now, tell me why this was such a big deal."

She was laughing too hard to answer right away. After catching her breath she explained "Johnny would have been furious. I couldn't have tasted them to figure it out because he would have dumped them out and told me that I had ruined the trip."

I was stunned. "What an ass! He ruins things with his piss poor attitude and then puts the blame on you? Was he afraid of catching something from you? Green flippin' gods! Did he not kiss you?"

"Well, yes... but never on the lips"

"WHAT??? He never swapped spit but claimed to want to marry you? What the hell?"

"Swapped...? Oh!" she blushed.

I fumed for a bit in silence. April sat in silence too until I noticed her shoulders moving up and down rhythmically.

"Oh crap. Hey now, I didn't mean to..."

She cut me off with one of the most beautiful sounds in the universe. A female belly laugh straight from the heart.

"'Green flipping gods?' 'Swapped spit?' Hahahahah!!!" April pointed her finger at me "You are incredibly funny when you're mad, you know that?" She punctuated this with a light touch of her index finger to the end of my nose. We giggled for a bit.

---

"April, would you be offended if I correct Johnny's oversight?" I asked