Average: The Beginning Ch. 02byCarrier_Violet©
I can't believe it's been three months since I moved away from my entire life. I haven't called anyone from my family. Severing all ties seems to be working for everyone. I wish I could talk to my mother sometimes about everything that has been happening these last few weeks especially.
I have been so stressed with finals and Avery being at every turn is driving me crazy. If I hadn't gotten to know him better, I would say he was trying to drive me that way on purpose, but I do know him.
I am probably being paranoid. Why would my family want to push me into thinking I am crazy? To go back to them when I have no need of them? Or to just have another breeder to ensure I am useful at something like making males with abilities? I don't think so.
But I have no regrets, except one. I haven't had the courage to tell Avery that I am gay and secretly in love with him.
I didn't mean to fall in love with him, it just happened.
It all started after that first meeting and snowballed out of control. It's not like we can get away from each other all that often. I am definitely not going home and Avery brought all his stuff here so there isn't a reason besides visiting.
But he is always appearing when I least expect it. I would be trying to do my homework and he would come back to the room wrapped in only a towel after showering. I would have been alright if only he didn't drop his towel to step into his incredibly tight boxer briefs. My dick twitches with the mere mention of him.
And, I completely forget about modest decorum and stare at him. Avery caught me staring on a couple of occasions. Blushing little a teenaged schoolgirl I would quickly turn away so I never caught the smirks he flashed at having distracted me.
But it is not only his, amazing by the way, body that has me head over DC's. It is also the sincere way he regards everything in life. He says he gets it from his mom's side of the family. It is like he has no cares in the world, and at the same time tries so hard to please everyone.
Oh man do I love this man!! I have never had so many wet dreams in my life. They are the most embarrassing experiences I've had since starting school.
I am in my dorm room lying in bed when Avery would sit down on the edge. He leans in closer so that his eyes are the only thing I can see. His breath I can feel whispering across my lips. And finally he kisses me. At first it isn't a lingering kiss, but then he presses harder like he is trying to melt into my being. We have to break apart to catch our breaths but our foreheads touch. Sometime during the kiss he has placed his body over top of mine and is nestled between my legs. I can feel his massive erection causing the most splendid pressure across my own bulge. I can't stand it, so I wiggle to get his attention. He moans out my name and starts to slowly hump me causing more of that wonderful friction. I have waited too long for this so I reach around and grab his ass to pull into me harder.
He moans like a starving animal but he gets the idea and starts to gyrate quicker over top of me. He grabs a hold of the side of my head to kiss me. We lose our rhythm as he nears his own climax. I am starting to shake apart with the force of my own. I feel like I am gonna lose consciousness. He screams as he blows his load in his pants and I wake up in the morning with a sizable amount of splatter already drying inside my sleep shorts.
I have seen Avery naked plenty of times now, most on the sly. He sometimes will be semi erect so imagining him fully erect is a favorite past time of mine. Him being flaccid is a glorious five inches, uncut. So he has to be at least nine inches. I haven't seen anyone else's except my own so I could be mistaken. I myself am about seven inches and three fingers thick. I never thought of myself as huge or hung. Just average.
But I most definitely would die if he looked over his bunk in the morning and spotted me readjusting to be able to escape to the shower. It is a good thing his classes are in the afternoons and he is a heavy sleeper. I would hate to find out I moan in my sleep as well.
I escape without detection and get to stare at my own personal wet dream in person. The way the morning light hits his sculpted face is breathtaking. As well as the tent in his shorts that makes my own problem more uncomfortable, but I can live with a little pain if it comes with this view every morning.
It is getting really hard to be around Connor now. I try to seduce him and he looks away.
Probably walking around naked in front of him all the time is giving him a complex? Or he is trying for modesty? Or my gaydar is non-existent. It's not like there was a line handing it out for free anywhere. If there was a how-to-be-gay manual I lost my copy too. What do I do??
He hasn't actually said anything about his preferences when we talk about ourselves. And yeah, I haven't completely been honest with him about mine either. I think I like the thought that if I don't know, I can keep my fantasy alive. What if he isn't gay after all? But the way he stares, like I am the last hope of water in the desert. I know.
And when he blushes when I lower my towel and he gets to see all of me. It drives me crazy. And he will stare at all of me, so of course I can't contain my delight and get half erect. Sometimes I don't think he is actually aware he is staring at me until I will look over at him. But he turns away from me.
I don't know what this feeling I have for him is yet. It may be love, or what if it is just lust? I have no clue. I never had to worry about any of this before. I am a virgin, in all senses. Yes I know I like guys better for certain over girls. I just never had the opportunity to try anything. And I am hoping Connor wants to be my first in Every. Single. Way.
Maybe I should just ask him out. Or make a hint that I think some guy is cute. Subtlety isn't really my strong suit. I'll just have to kiss him. I am such a coward.
It isn't like we don't know each other. These past few months we may not have talked about a lot of things that we should have, but we are friends at least. We have had some movie nights, study sessions and even gone out together for dinners or lunches.
The only problem I have is these dreams. Of course they feature Connor. I had plenty of wet dreams throughout high school of course. With the whole Tommy issue behind me I felt better about crushing on guys, but not telling them made me feel safer. Just these feel a whole lot more real than any I have ever had.
I will be walking into the dorm room and Connor will be sleeping on his bed. I watch him for a short while but I feel the need to be close to him. Sitting on the edge of his bed I lean over to smell him. He is awake and intently staring at me. I just have to kiss him knowing I will never have a chance like this again. I try to be gentle at first but he tastes even better than I imagined. I press my lips fully to his to convey what I really want. I move my body over his setting myself between his legs.
I am totally hard just from the kiss and I can feel him awakening to the passion. From this I can tell he isn't as big as me but I don't care. I am finally getting my fantasy!! I rub furiously against him. It can't get much better than this, but as always Connor surprises me by grabbing my ass pulling me deeper into his erection.
I lose all self control and let go. Bucking faster into him. He is constantly moaning my name without regard to whether he knows it or not. I feel like a man that was dying but found a cure to ease his pain. I lose it after that, screaming my release. I felt him tense under me and knew he was getting off with just me.
That was the best orgasm of my life. But something was wrong...
Okay, these wet dreams aren't the only problem. It's the fact that I am more floating over my body that freaks me out during them. I can feel all the pleasure from the experience but I wasn't getting to participate. Does that even make sense?
Let me see if I can explain this better. I have the sense I have fallen asleep but I will be watching my body doing things I never thought I'd do, except in dreams. It felt like a dream. But then why wasn't I in the driver seat??
Like I was possessed. I had the feeling I was floating by the ceiling looking down wishing it was me getting to touch Connor, but it WAS me.
I wake up in the morning in my bed so I figured it was all a dream if even a weird one. I hear Connor moving around sometimes in the morning and he has the cutest little mewling noises while he shifts. Probably stretching.
I know I have been getting these strange cramps in my legs and back. Probably from these dorm room beds. They aren't that comfortable. That has to be it. Not because we have been frolicking at night with each other. Again those are dreams.
I'll just keep telling myself that. Yep.
It's Christmas break. I am glad the dorms are gonna be open. I already bought my family presents and sent them through the mail. And because I couldn't stop myself I called home and talked to my mom.
Of course she cried asking when I was gonna be by for Christmas and I froze. "Connor, are you there? Did I lose you?"
Without another heartbeat I told her everything that was happening with Avery and school and that I wasn't coming back for the holidays. She said she understood.
She also said she was going to ask my father about the dreams I was having and the weird cramps and migraines, but I quickly put a stop to that. How do you have your mother telling your father that 1) You're gay and 2) Having wet dreams about a guy without him killing you? I know I'm miles away but I like my being alive very much.
I could tell she was trying to be supportive but I could hear the break in her voice when she wished me a Merry Christmas. Being the softy I am I broke down and with tears in my voice told her I loved her and to tell everyone "hi" from me.
I couldn't take anymore so I told her goodbye. Hopefully I will see her sometime soon. Maybe I can get her to come and visit me instead. But my father will never allow it with Markl to look after.
Avery was going to go home for part of the holiday but he said he would be back at the start of the week for some hang time.
I had some friends in my classes staying in the dorms too, but I never actually felt up to hanging around them outside class when they invited me to parties and lunch. I guess once an isolated freak always, right?
I just wished I could see Avery again. We talked on the phone on Christmas day and he told me about how is family was doing. It felt like we were only on the phone for a few minutes but it had been hours and he had to get to his dinner. So promising that I would see him in a couple days we disconnected.
My dinner was fast food out of a greasy bag. Yay!
It was a relief, and disappointing, to talk to Connor on Christmas. I knew he didn't want to talk about his family and going home was out too.
I felt bad for him, but hearing his voice was soothing all the same. We spent hours talking about my family and a bunch of nothing. I think we both needed the comfort if not the words.
Disappointing all the same, for the week I was at home, because I didn't get to have one of my dreams with Connor. I have been having them nonstop at school, but now when I am home away from him I don't get any. It was frustrating to say the least. The one time I am away from him and I don't even get to see him in my dreams.
I have been able to relax though. Sleeping in my old bed is wonderful. No more cramps or aches. Since I already took the majority of my stuff to school, why not take my mattress too. Ha!
It's the perfect size for cuddling. Wish Connor was snuggled up with me. But I wouldn't be sleeping if you get my drift. He looks so sexy when he wakes up with his hair tousled, and I already mentioned the beautifully sexy sounds he makes when stretching.
Just thinking about all the ways he looks in and out of bed has me harder than ever. The entire time I was on the phone with him earlier I felt guilty for having a hard-on when he was probably lonely. But now I can do something about the ache I can control, most of the time.
Sliding my boxers off of my legs my dick slaps across my abdomen reaching past my belly button. I had a very bad ego when I was younger and have measured myself. I am very proud to be the owner of a ten inch dick. It doesn't get very thick, but it suits me fine.
Grabbing hold of my hardened member I gently begin to stroke it. The precum that is flowing freely lubricates nicely easing the roughness of my hands. I imagine it is Connor's soft silky hand running up and down my pole. He leans forward and looks up at me with a question in his eyes that has me moaning out his name. Before I can even imagine it is his mouth sliding down my dick, I erupt. Spraying my chest and chin with my thick cum.
That was not one of the hardest times I've came but it was close to one of the best. I can't wait to get back to the dorms and live out my fantasy with the real Connor because the next time I see him...