Bad Penny

{Once again I find myself unsure of a proper category. So I put it in loving wives, what the heck.}

*

She was one, once upon a time.

I spotted her clear across the parking lot, and there was no doubt in my mind.

My former wife, Patty.

Other than perhaps one size increase on her fanny she looked about the same. The same pretty flowered print type dress, the same "just a bit too short" look. The same long flowing red hair, the type of red that has just about every color possible in it, curled down and flowing over her shoulders.

I thought about that, it had been 21 years, that meant that she had just turned 40 a few weeks before. I had just turned 50.

I climbed into the cab of my big white work truck, wondering just what in the hell she was doing back here?

At least now I knew who the woman was that had showed up at my office while I was out.

"Nasty looking Redhead." Tammy had said with a big shit eating grin, pretending to be busy typing.

Tammy had been running my office for nearly a decade. She was black, slightly chubby, and typed in a blur. The keyboard didn't click, it made a whirring sound. She missed nothing, too. I just could not keep a secret from her, no need to either.

Tammy was always in the office when I got there, and always there when I left. She was a pretty lady, too. Her manner of dress was slightly conservative. On the phones, if a customer was upset she just tied them up in knots and had them laughing in seconds.

I just shook my head, no idea who it could have been.

It just never registered on me that it might be Patty.

I knew a bit about Patty's life after we broke up, how she had married one partner in a real estate firm, set him up with her girlfriend from behind the scenes and then divorced him. Now as the new full partner, she managed to marry the other one. Men can be stupid sometimes, darned if she didn't end up owning the whole works after the next divorce.

Our marriage hadn't lasted long, either. One day I came home to an empty bank account, the house cleaned out and my dog gone. I went a bit nuts, madder about the little dog than anything else.

The crazy high speed drive up the freeway to Idaho in the middle of the night ended up with me in a conflict with her brother. He was big, bigger than me, but I was mean as he found out.

He ended up on the ground, his elbow broken. The other guy lay there trying to breathe, the 3rd guy didn't want any part of it.

I doubt I even changed expression.

That got me a bit of advice from a couple of Cops to leave the State and not come back so I wisely took it and left.

It is hard to explain how a woman can have an effect on a man. I thought about Patty over the years, the bad times faded and the good times seemed to get better.

Then one day the email arrived. It was years ago, just a "Hi!" and some yap about her three kids and stuff like that. Then a long piece about how she was "sorry" and always loved me.

My answer was short and to the point.

"Your fault, not mine. Leave me alone!"

I didn't even sign it.

It made me think of that last day, the thoughts that went through my head. I had actually considered just handling the two Cops, I knew I could. I think they knew it too from the scene they found when they showed up. They had even allowed a bit more distance from me than would be expected, I spotted the sidelong glances, the wary stance. Not enough distance, I knew.

It really is amazing what 3 solid years of Karate classes can do for a man.

It popped in my head to do that, then wrap my fingers around Patty's throat and just squeeze. Two Cops I could handle, but I also knew that would bring more, and then even more. I didn't relish the idea of jail or worse at all.

So my common sense took over, I turned and walked away, got in my car and left.

I never saw her again until now. Just the one email in all the years.

That all poured through my head as I watched her load packages from a shopping cart into a fairly new BMW. I had read that she was doing well, made a few million on the Real Estate boom. But now it was a Real Estate crunch, I knew that too.

I had also done well, my company had 32 employees and was multi-national. I had ridden a timber company called WTDI on the exchange from $4 to $12, rolled out just before they went bankrupt, invested that into high tech for some 1000% gains, bailed into money funds in the late 90's.

I could say it was skill, cleverness, I bailed just before all hell broke loose in New York and stocks tanked. But no truth to that, it just happened, pure luck on the timing.

I suddenly had a pile of capital.

I used that to do my startup, just two of us working, reinvesting, growing by leaps and bounds.

32 people working now, machines whirring away.

Yep, I was getting pretty well off. I had started buying up properties, land. I could see the looming shortage of buildable properties, so I went for it. Of course Patty being in Real Estate knew about that, as I came to find out.

That part didn't sink in right then, all I really knew was I was sitting in my truck watching my ex-wife, my dick as hard as it ever got.

The woman I married three years after the divorce from Patty was final was killed in a pedestrian accident right in front of me some 6 years back. Just crossing the street from the Bank, a little old lady drove by and then decided to go to the bank herself. My wife smiled at me and waved, looked to her right and started across.

The old lady suddenly stopped, put the old SUV into reverse and backed up. I was beating on the steering wheel, trying to blow the horn, warn her.

A helpless feeling, like in slow motion. I could see it happening, knew what was going to happen, trying in my mind to stop that car. It just kept coming.

I held Lee in my arms as she weeped, blood flecks forming on her lips with each ragged breath.

"Oh, Dan. I am sorry." Her last words to me. Then her eyes closed, and she went still.

I remember hearing the sirens coming, then everything went black.

I just buried myself in work after that, part of the reason for the crazy success of the company.

No time or inclination for women, I devolved into solo sexuality.

Now I sat there in my truck, watching my ex-wife, realizing I had an insane erection. The exact same reaction I got when I indulged myself alone at home, thoughts of her filling my mind.

Even when married to Lee, my private moments, my private thoughts always shifted to Patty. I happen to know it is possible to love two women, I know I loved Lee. Life with her was quiet, good. We shared everything, no secrets.

Peaceful, that is the word.

Life with Patty was insanity, rages, crazy sex.

Starting my truck, I drove off the lot, right by Patty. She never saw me, I just pulled out onto the street and headed for my office.

My mind was a jumble of memories. That first time, Patty sat cross-legged on the carpet in front of me as I sat in my beanbag chair. Her short skirt was hiked even higher, nothing underneath, she knew I could see her. It was deliberate.

I had my old 12 string guitar, playing a bad version of a Cat Stevens song.

"Miles from Nowhere." I sang, watching her smile at me in delight. We were both stoned to the gills, Patty was always stoned.

Me, too back then. But only because of her, I never touched the stuff before or since.

I had set the guitar down, ready to make my move. I didn't have to, she scooted over and climbed on top of me, somehow her pretty little 34C breasts with all those freckles and pink nipples were bare and in my face. The only thing that kept that criss-cross top she wore in place was a string at the side, one tug and there she was. Her body fit against mine like they were created to fit together, I can't explain that any other way.

I realized after the first time that she hadn't orgasmed.

So I tried again, same result. After that I tried everything I could think of, finally whispering fantasies in her ear and using my fingers to tease her loins as I nuzzled her earlobes, licking her nipples, trying set her off.

It took a full half hour. Every single time.

Oddly most of the time Patty wasn't concerned with that, but she wanted me inside of her. It almost seemed like she wanted that all the time. I got so I could last so long I would actually feel myself getting sore, Patty just did not orgasm during intercourse.

The problem was Patty wanted every man she saw inside of her.

We were married and setting up a life before I began to get the picture. Those sexy tops and silly looking sizzler outfits weren't for my benefit, they were for everyone's benefit.

My Patty was a loose lady. It was a constant source of argument, we fought like cats and dogs. I tried to control her, all that was going on. It couldn't be done.

Then that day I came home, and she was gone. It tore my heart out, I wanted her. I hated her at the same time.

The night before I had accused her, she finally admitted that she had spent the day in bed with her Mom's boyfriends brother. A guy I simply hated, making it worse. That was a terrible fight, ending only when somehow we ended up in bed, I pounded at her not in love but in anger. I was trying to hurt her.

It didn't. She actually seemed to like it?

All was this pouring through my head as I drove back to my shop, not completely in control. I slammed on the brakes barely in time to keep from running into a car at a stoplight. The guy sitting there flipped me off in the mirror, I gave him a wave.

Tammy looked up as I walked into the main office. One glance and she knew, Tammy always knew everything. I nodded and walked by into my little private office, shut the door.

She knocked on the door about 10 minutes later, handed me a steaming cup of coffee.

"I will be outside if you need me...for anything." She said, that knowing look on her face. I just nodded, deep in my thoughts.

It was about an hour later when my desk phone rang.

"A Mrs. Patty Wilkins to see you, Dan?"

It was a question.

"Show her in." I answered, with a resigned sigh.

I have to admit Patty looked good, the years were kind to her or she was good at hiding it. She seemed fuller in the bust and I had already noted the size increase of her behind.

That didn't hurt a thing.

"So how have you been, Dan?" Patty asked as I waved at the other chair in front of my desk.

"Fine, just working all the time."

"I hope you don't mind me stopping by, I wanted to see you...see how you are."

Her eyes swept around the room, I noticed she looked down at the desk I sat at. I do know the desk cost more than everything we had owned back when we were married.

"You seem to have done well." She smiled.

"So what's up?" I asked.

"Remember when I told you that one day I would show up with three kids and a station wagon?" She smiled.

I remembered that.

"Well, here I am. Three kids and..a Mercedes."

She leaned forward, the top of her blouse gapped slightly.

"All these years...All this time, I thought about you, Dan."

"Dan, I have shipping on line two!" Tammy's voice came over the intercom.

I reached for the phone, realizing I was breaking a sweat.

"Just checking to see if you needed anything, Dan." Tammy's voice was on the line.

I smiled at that, Tammy was my best asset, like I said. She missed nothing.

"Everything is fine, thanks." I told her.

"Maybe we can go somewhere..more private?" Patty started right up again.

"I need to finish up here, how about I pick you up later for dinner?" I told her.

Patty smiled and nodded, jotted down the address of a local hotel. I showed her out, Tammy pointedly stayed busy, that keyboard whirring away.

She came into my office a few minutes later as I sat there in thought, handing me some payments to approve and a steaming cup of coffee.

"That one is a skank, Dan!" Tammy said, in a tone of voice I had never heard before.

"A skank?" I looked at her oddly.

"Yea, she gonna skin your hide and eat the insides!" She said, reverting back to an african mannerism I had also never heard her use before.

She turned away quickly, but not before I saw the trace of a tear in her eyes.

"Now what the hell?" I thought, as she flounced out and not so quietly shut the door.

Shaking my head, I went home, showered and shaved. I climbed into my Magnum and pushed the computer button for directions, even though I knew the way. Somehow the mechnical woman's voice calmed me down.

The hotel clerk rang Patty's room, then told me to go on up. I took the elevator to the top suite, knocked on the door.

Patty opened the door, I stepped in, then I got a good look at her. She was wearing a filmy white coverup and not a damned thing else.

The door barely swung shut before she was pressed against me.

I have to admit I was not quite ready for that.

She had me pressed back on the couch in seconds, her hands reached down to unclasp my slacks.

"Wait a minute!" I said, pushing her back.

"What's wrong?" She asked.

"I...Hey, it's been a long time, let's slow down."

"I want you, Dan. We belong together, you know that."

I stood up, Patty lay back on the couch, her legs carelessly apart. I looked her up and down. from her fuller than I remembered breasts to the tuft of red hair between her legs.

This was the same woman I had been crazily in love with, just a mature version. The same one that had hurt me beyond belief, too.

I realized I wasn't excited, I stood there looking at her. I realized that now I felt nothing at all.

What was it Tammy had said?

"Skank?"

Well, not a word I would use, but it fit.

"What do you want from me, Patty?"

"I want us to be together, I know you love me!"

"Patty, I don't love you. I did once, but not now."

"We can start over, we can be together!" She still sat there, her body on display to me. I think she expected that this would be all it would take, every man reacted the same to her.

I felt the same emotions I had felt years before, anger, desire, pain all mixed in at once. The fantasies I had had in my private moments, right in front of me.

I also realized I felt nothing real.

The really odd part was it flashed in my mind that I wondered what Tammy would think if she saw us like this?

"I was right when I emailed you years ago, Patty. It was your fault, not mine."

I headed for the door, then stopped and looked back at her. She had an expression of shock on her face, there were no tears.

"Yes, your fault. Leave me alone!"

I walked out, took the elevator down, got in my car and headed home. My head was full of thoughts, I wasn't paying a lot of attention to where I was going until I realized I was heading down the street where Tammy lived.

I sat out in front for a long time, thinking. Then I got out, walked up and rang the bell.

Tammy answered the door, a look of surprise on her face.

"Hi. I was thinking, I have these nice reservations for dinner?"

Tammy studied me for a moment.

"Come in Dan. I will be ready in just a few minutes." Her smile was huge, she seemed to almost skip as she went into the other room.

I sat on the couch, still thinking.

I had no idea where this would lead, but I knew it was right.

Tammy came back out in just a few minutes. Her hair was brushed, she had on a flowery print dress, simple but pretty. I looked her up and down.

"You like?" She did a little spin.

"I like very much!" I grinned.

Tammy slipped her hand into mine, and we headed out the door. In the car, she patted the seat right next to me.

"May I?"

"Sure."

She snuggled up right next to me, leaned her head on my shoulder.

Somehow it belonged there.

I was smiling as I put the car into gear.