Becky & Lisa: The End of Summer

I saw little of Becky following that night and when I did, she never brought up what happened at the party. On the one hand, why would she? She had no idea I had seen her with Ben and Amanda, and I wasn't about to ask. But on the other hand, it troubled me to know that she was keeping something a secret from me, that there was something she had done that she was choosing not to tell me about, when previously she had always been honest with me, and trusted me with so much about herself that she kept from others.

Soon, it was time for us both to leave our family homes and start the first terms of our university education. My mum and dad packed all my stuff into their car and drove me to the halls of residence where I would be living for the next year. Becky's mum did the same for her.

I tried to put Becky from my mind. We'd had a brief goodbye a couple of nights before. It was emotional, but what hadn't been said seemed to hang in the air with greater weight than what we did say. Becky by now I think had realised I was upset, but didn't know why. I think she probably figured it had something to do with the party, but my unending capacity for burying my feelings and keeping things to myself meant I brushed off any attempts by her to find out what was bothering me. In the end, we parted as friends, but with a sense of something between us which hadn't been resolved.

But, I reasoned, the next few weeks and months were about new beginnings. I was going to meet new people and do things I hadn't ever done before – I couldn't spend time dwelling on the past. I would see and speak to Becky again, but for now I was thinking just about the future.