Beetlesmith's Ch. 02

"I'm not sure I understand, is this a relative of yours?"

Beetlesmith chuckled at the irony of my question, "I should say so. That's a photo of me. It was taken by my wife about ten years ago on the day I discovered the elixir."

Words couldn't begin to describe the differences I saw between the Mr. Beetlesmith standing before me and the man in the photograph. Whereas Beetlesmith was at best five foot seven inches tall, the man in the photo looked to be closer to six foot. Beetlesmith was balding, short and squat, with a slight hunch to his shoulders as if he suffered from what I thought was chronic back pain. The man in the photos was none of those things; tall, fit and trim. A near perfect physical example of a man. Mr. Beetlesmith was his exact opposite, and if what he said were true, then Beetlesmith could not be more than forty, but the man who stood in front of me now looked not a day younger than sixty.

Oh, but that's impossible. This must be some sort of joke.

Beetlesmith guessed what I was thinking, "The contrast is striking, isn't it? If only I knew then what I know now then I would not have so overindulged in my own creation."

"This is hard for me to believe," I finally said.

"I find it hard to believe that by this time and after all that you have experienced, you would still doubt me," Beetlesmith said with a hint of acrimony, "My father used to say to me that there are no free lunches in this world, and so it is with my elixir. A price will be paid for the ultimate aphrodisiac. I will add that the effects vary with the individual. Some have been using it for quite a while and only show the barest signs of deterioration. Others, however..."

Beetlesmith didn't finish his statement, there was no need. I knew what he said was true, and I knew what had happened to the others. They quickly became like that Mr. Jasper, who I met yesterday. Now I understood why he and Beetlesmith looked so much like brothers, they both overindulged.

I was at a crossroads. My head was telling me to run like hell, and never go back. Leave Beetlesmith's, and leave the elixir. Christ, leave the fucking money if you have to, but just leave and go back to your normal life. However, my heart, or should I say another of my organs, was singing a more seductive tune. You're here with the cash, just buy the one vial. One vial won't do you that much damage; think of the pleasure...think of the fun. Just take the one vial. You don't have to come back for more.

I slid the money across the counter.

"Excellent!" Mr. Beetlesmith exclaimed, "A wise decision. You won't be disappointed. Now, before we conclude our transaction there is one more item we need to address."

"Yes?" I said weakly and with great apprehension, thinking this is where he tells me my dick will fall off after so many years of use.

"You are not to tell anyone of its existence. Not your wife, sweethearts, close family members, no one can know. Ever. I relish my anonymity, and wish no unwanted visitors to my store asking about fabled love potions. Agreed?"

I nodded my head, and upon which he slid three sheets of paper across the counter. On each page were about thirty names listed in alphabetical order. Many of the names I didn't recognize, but there were a few I did. They were very famous names, people known as movers and shakers in politics and industry. I was also listed, highlighted as a matter of fact.

"What's this?"

"That's my insurance policy, Mr. Henry. It's a list of all my valued customers. Everyone gets the list, so everyone knows who's a customer of mine. Now, if by some chance I get the impression that my elixir is becoming common knowledge to those not on my list, then I will cut everyone, and I mean everyone, off from my elixir. And to be blunt, I've exercised that clause more than once. It was a very unpleasant experience for all concerned. So this is my guarantee. I don't think I need to tell you that some of my customers are people of immense power and influence. And I don't think I have to tell you how angered they all would be if they were suddenly denied access to my elixir. I can't be sure exactly what they'll do, but I can guess it will be unpleasant," he paused and slid the small vial of elixir across to me, and then finished saying, "Remember Mr. Henry, silence is golden."

******************

On the drive home I wondered what kind of Faustian bargain I had made. The allure of unlimited sexual power over anyone in the world, in exchange I end up as an over-sexed gnome. If I end up looking like Beetlesmith then I'm really going to need the elixir to get laid.

Then there was the not too veiled threat at the end, 'Powerful people can make one's life unpleasant.' What would happen if, just by chance, one of the other clients decided to spill the beans? Who would get the blame? Why, the new guy on the list, of course. One thing I will say is that these new complications put my earlier concerns about Karen right out of my mind.

First thing I decided was I would use it very sparingly, maybe once or twice a year or so, starting tonight, of course. This was going to be a very rich delicacy I would only indulge in on special occasions. Second, after the rare event I would watch for any telltale signs for any of the physical or psychological abnormalities that may develop, in that way I may be able to take greater precautions and moderate the elixir's use better.

I had left Beetlesmith's in too great a hurry. What were the first signs of problems, physical or psychological? If one took the elixir once a year as I plan, would the side effects manifest at all, or were they truly inevitable no matter the dosage? Would just one application produce the deleterious side effects regardless of whether I took another? I even forgot to ask him about combining the elixir with alcohol.

I had so many questions and no answers. Were the risks worth the reward? Unlimited sexual power over anyone; I kept repeating that phrase as I drove into my town, and knew that at this time the reward was worth the risk. So much so that along the way I decided to stop off at the Adult Novelty Store for a few marital enhancements.

When I got home, I saw that the house was apparently empty. I figured Karen and Gloria had gone shopping again, so I decided to wait for them on the patio and organize my thoughts in the interim. However, when I walked out into the back of my home I was surprised to find Gloria sitting at the patio table, staring blankly at the horizon.

"Where's Karen?" I asked, inadvertently startling her.

She giggled, and once she caught her breath, said, "Oh, you scared me."

"I didn't mean too," I said apologetically.

I bent over to give her a kiss, but she turned her head slightly so that I could only peck at a cheek. At least Beetlesmith was correct about the Afterglow; Gloria's somewhat cool response to my kiss indicated she was back to normal.

Sitting in the chair next to her, I asked again, "Where's Karen?"

Gloria got a nervous look on her face, shrugged her shoulders, and tried to change the subject, "Will, about this morning...I...I don't want you to get the impression that there's anything..."

"More between us?" I added, guessing her intent. She smiled weakly and nodded her head, and I continued, "Look, this morning and last night were special. Something we all did on the spur of the moment, and it felt good and right at the time, but I'm not going to read anything more into it. I love Karen...and I love you for that matter, but for different reasons. That said, I'm not going to leave her based on a wild escapade."

Gloria visibly breathed a sigh of relief, and then said, "I'm glad. I was worried about how you felt...about us I mean. Now, I just wish Karen thought the same way."

"Why?" I asked, "What happened?"

"Oh, it was after you left. She got up finally, and I could tell she was really pissed. You know how she gets when she's mad. She huffs and puffs around the house, not saying anything directly to you. Then she starts slamming cupboards and drawers open and closed, looking for nothing in particular, just trying to make noise and get noticed. When I finally asked her what was wrong, she blurted out, 'I heard you fucking him.' Then she got dressed in a hurry and left. I think she thinks we're in love and are going to run away together, or some such nonsense."

I asked again, "Do you know where she went?"

She shrugged her shoulders to evade the question. Gloria was always an awful liar. She knew where Karen went but was reluctant to tell me. So I tried a more direct track, "I was thinking about the events of last night and there were some things said by the two of you that put me at unease. I'm not going to go over the particulars with you. I'm just going to ask you straight out, is Karen seeing someone else?"

She stammered an 'I don't know,' but it was half-hearted, so I pressed her again, "Come on Gloria, I think I deserve to know the truth. Is she having an affair?"

She sat silently for a time as I stared at her, and finally said weakly, "I don't know."

She knew; I could read it in her face. It all made sense to me. The months of Karen's low sexual desire with me, the hints and innuendoes of Gloria last night, it all pointed to Karen's affair. Karen had probably told Gloria about it at some point prior to her visit. She needed to tell someone, and chose her best friend to unburden herself of her transgressions. After her confession, Karen most likely swore Gloria to secrecy, probably with the promise that Karen would eventually break off the affair. I assume this because it was unlike Gloria to allow anyone to hurt a friend such as myself without breaking off contact, even if the person doing the hurt was her best friend and my wife. However, the elixir pushed the uneasy conspiracy to the breaking point. Karen was unusually antagonistic toward Gloria, and Gloria lashed back at her with subtle innuendo that I had picked up on. As for this morning, Karen was probably within the erotic grips of Afterglow. She was most likely mad that Gloria and I had done it without her and that I had left; and as a consequence, she went to find sexual relief from the next available person, her lover.

I kept these thoughts to myself and waited for Karen to return.

I did not have to wait long. Karen entered the house carrying a small bag of groceries, and putting them on the counter kissed me on the cheek. When she leaned close to me I tried to tell if I could smell him on her, but I could not discern anything. Gloria was watching the two of us from the kitchen table.

"Where did you go?" I asked nonchalantly.

"Oh, shopping," she replied, "Where did you go?"

"I had a few things to do at the office. So you went shopping by yourself?"

Karen did not answer me directly, but turned to Gloria, "I'm sorry dear, I thought you said you were tired. If you wanted to come with me all you had to do was say so."

Gloria did not answer, but looked down at the table.

"Was that the reason, because you thought she was tired," I asked, "Or was it because you knew she wouldn't be interested in your boy toy?"

Karen shot an icy glance over to Gloria, then quickly lowering her eyes to the floor in an attempt to hide the obvious anger she felt toward her perceived traitor.

I laughed sarcastically, saying, "Oh, don't get mad at her. She didn't tell me anything. It wasn't hard to piece together after what was said last night. I may be slow on the uptake but I'm not stupid."

"What was said last night?" Karen asked defensively.

"Does it matter? So far you're not denying it. Besides, your reaction just now is the greater indictment. All I want to know is how long and with whom."

Karen knew it was no use in trying to hide it, and looked down at the floor while answering, "Six months."

"Six fucking months!" I raged.

Karen quickly tried to minimize the damage, "But I ended it about a month ago..."

"Oh, that's so magnanimous of you. A whole month ago you say, but I guess you needed a quickie this morning for old time's sake."

Karen started to get indignant, "Don't you dare get on your high-horse. Talk about quickies, what was all that banging and moaning I heard coming from the shower this morning?"

"Yeah, you're right, and that's the only reason why I haven't packed my bags, frozen our accounts and called a lawyer, yet. But don't go talking about moaning. I seem to remember a whole lot of moaning last night, or was there someone else I'm unaware of that was doing it with Gloria and me. Don't try to equate the two things. What we did, we did together; all of us. I didn't sneak around and fuck someone behind your back, and I certainly didn't do it for six fucking months."

"Oh, shut up about it; It's over!" said Karen angrily.

"No I won't shut up about it, not until I know who it was, or is."

"Why," Karen shrieked, "So you can go beat him up or something worse?"

"No! I want to know so I can avoid the cocksucker. So the next time I'm talking to someone, anyone, and he gives me an inadvertent smirk because his shorts are riding too high, or an accidental wink of the eye because the pollen's making it itch, or just because he parts his hair like a dumb fuck, I'm not standing there like some jag-off wondering if this is the stupid prick who was humping my wife. Now, who was it?"

She stood obstinately a few feet away from me, arms crossed. She wasn't going to say. So, I started to goad her by rattling off names of every sleazy, degenerate, numb-nuts guy we had ever known, "It was Jake Taggard...Pete Carol...Conrad Turner the oaf..."

On and on I shot names at Karen, each individual having a lower repute than the next, and with each name offered I could see the bile beginning to slowly rise in her, "Toomey...Cranston...that skinning kid at the drug store with the bad acne..."

"Keep going, but I'm not going to say," she reiterated with scorn, adding, "You're really making an asshole out of yourself."

Yes I was, but I didn't give a fuck at this point, and continued, "Parker, the one with halitosis, not the one with the limp? No? Okay, the one with the limp then? No? Krukowski...Muscone...Oh, wait I know. It's that fat, greasy slob who does our lawn, the one who always smells like fungus..."

That last one almost made Karen swallow her tongue, "No! God; what kind of person do you think I am?!"

"I hope that was a rhetorical question, because right now I can think of a lot of things: slut, whore, cun..."

"It was Roger!" she finally blurted out.

"Roger!? Kendall!? That Roger? My fucking supervisor, Roger!?" I yelled incredulously, "Goddamn it, it would have been better if you were fucking the slob! For weeks now that cocksucker has been trying to fuck me over at the company, and doing a great fucking job of it. He's been taking me off one account after the other, freezing me out of meetings, and giving me the dregs to work with; although I've been able to make a go of them, which has pissed him off even more. That asshole; and you've been banging him, the one guy who's been trying to put me into the unemployment line."

"I'm sorry," said Karen with great despair in her voice, "How was I supposed to know? You never tell me about work."

I stared at her for a moment, and then said incredulously, "Just what in the hell does that mean?" and then said mockingly, "Gee honey, next time tell me who you're having problems with at work so I don't inadvertently fuck them. I want to make sure I only bang those guys you like. What the hell."

"That's not what I meant!"

"Well what did you mean?"

Karen barely spit out, "Just that I'm sorry," before she began to cry.

Between large gulps of air, a great deluge of tears to stream down her cheeks; and between great sobs, all she would mutter was, "I'm sorry," over and over again, until she fell into my arms.

It was genuine anguish, and I could no longer be mad at her. It would be a very long time before I could forget, but I had already started to forgive her. How could I not? If there were a difference between what she did and what I had done with the elixir, it was only by a matter of degrees. Still, I wish it had been anyone other than Roger Kendall.

If what Karen had said were true, that she had first broken it off with him about a month ago, it would have coincided with the time he really started to put the screws to me. We never liked each other, and her breaking it off gave him the justification to really start to fuck me over. Prior to this, he probably thought me weak and feeble; and why not, he was banging my wife. Now, however, I was either a liability he couldn't afford to have near him, or he was just going full asshole on me by trying to get me fired out of spite. I could just hear the prick now, 'Hey Henry, did you know I was humping Karen? She really loves taking it up the ass. Oh, and by the way you're canned.'

Karen was still crying when I asked, "What did you say when you left him this afternoon?"

"I...I didn't say anything. What do you mean?"

"Does he think you two are back on?"

She shook her head while sniffing back the rest of her tears, "I don't know, maybe. I...We never really talk plans. Once in a while he calls...and..."

I laughed sarcastically, "Yeah, I get it, that's when you plan your little trysts, and of course you call him sometimes too."

"I'm not seeing him again if that's what you're worried about."

"You're fucking right you're not, but you're not going to tell him that, and for God's sake, don't tell him I know."

"What are you going to do?" she asked, concerned.

When I saw her worried look I had to laugh, "You dope. What do you think I am, some sort of tough guy? That I'm going to go down to the office and break his legs or kill him? To be honest, I'm not sure what I'm going to do except try to get away from the prick. I'll see about a transfer to another division in the company, but I need time. If that cocksucker learns that I know about you and him, he will can me, either out of spite or in the off-hand chance that I could do him damage with management."

That's how my day ended, well almost. I needed to get away from Karen for a while. I drove around a bit and eventually ended up in some roadside tavern and got drunk.

******************

I spent the next couple of days brooding. Usually when I was in a spat with Karen I could find solace in my work but even that area of my life was tainted, and that pissed me off even more. I was not openly antagonistic with anyone, but it was difficult for me to totally hide my animosity, particularly toward Karen. I rarely talked during those two days, and when I did it was usually in snide, terse phrases, and very sarcastic. It wasn't until Gloria decided to cut her visit short that I temporarily shelved the animosity I was feeling.

Karen suggested that before Gloria leaves, we should all go out for a night on the town. I agreed, but said I would rather it be a quiet dinner party here at home; just the three of us and maybe one other. Karen almost balked at the idea when I told her who I had in mind for a fourth.

"How 'bout your cousin Jackie?" I said, knowing what kind of a reaction I would get

"Jackie?" Karen scowled, "You think she's an imbecile. Hell, even I can't stand her and she's my family."

"I know, but it's because she's family that we should invite her. I think we've been rude by not having her over. Besides, Gloria might get a kick meeting her."

"Why would you think that? Gloria's a registered nurse. She's schooled herself for years in traditional medicine. All Jackie will have to do is start yammering about how her magic crystals can cure arthritis, and Gloria will go ballistic."

I laughed, "Well maybe Gloria can talk some sense into her."

Jackie was about two years older than Karen, and maybe it was the age difference between the two that contributed to Karen's animosity toward her, because for as long as I had known them they never seemed to get along. Jackie did not come off as mean or arrogant. In fact, she was quite the opposite, but she did have a way about her that rubbed Karen the wrong way. Usually it was saying something ditzy, to coin a phrase Karen used, or unintentionally saying exactly the wrong thing at the wrong time that aggravated my wife.