Before It's Too Late

Bob and Jen had been married for a long time – was it too late to swing for the first time?

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How would it start? What would we say? Is it something that we'd plan or just something that would turn up unexpectedly, not unwelcome but not invited either?

Let's go back a little.

Here we are, Bob and Jen, well into middle age now with the kids gone, the end of the mortgage in sight, happy and contented and, more than anything, comfortable with each other and yet ... and yet there are the what ifs: what if we'd met someone else all those years ago; what if I'd accepted that offer from the wife of those friends of ours from two houses and two towns ago; what if you hadn't come back to us after the break you took while consumed with depression after the birth of our second child? And what if we play out the fantasy of being with someone else, the fantasy that was tossed into the conversation at dinner with friends of friends a few nights ago as easily as a joint is passed around with the cognac?

I remember we were both a little uncomfortable at first, not because of the tone of the conversation – hell we're both broad minded – but because, inadvertently, we were in danger of speaking an unspoken truth between us: that now after all the years of struggle and hard work we've finally arrived at a place with no worries and a rosy future before us, except that although we wouldn't be with anyone else we both wonder what it would be like being with someone else.

Before it's too late.

"Are you ok to drive hon?" Jen was slouched in the seat beside me as I drove as carefully as I could, not wanting to attract the attention of any passing police cruiser.

"Yeah I'm fine. Anyway, I can't remember the last time I saw a cop within ten miles of here." That's one of the big advantages of being our age: enough money to buy the seclusion and quietness of a house in the hills. It also means that our neighbours are of a similar age and outlook.

I glanced over at Jen. "I didn't know Mike and Elaine before; did you?"

"No me neither." she replied. "I knew someone had moved into the house but not who. They're a really nice couple. I hope we see them again."

And I hoped that too. From the moment we walked into their house it felt easy, like we'd know each other for years; a couple of cocktails before dinner and then Elaine's wonderful cooking, plenty of wine and lots of noisy conversation punctuated with laughter. At one point I'd had tears rolling down my face as I laughed at something Mike had said and in the middle of this Elaine had just said "Hell we're laughing like a foursome at a wife-swap party" and we laughed all the harder until exhausted we quietened down and Jen asked "Is this how people laugh...when they're... when they're doing that?"

As Jen told me later, it had been on the tip of her tongue to ask "Now how would you know that Elaine?" but she'd thought better of it and quickly re-phrased her question to the less intrusive one she had asked.

And that was how the conversation had changed from careless laughter to intense conversation, at times almost philosophical, deep and probing. Jen had asked: "Do you think a marriage can really survive infidelity, even when it's condoned and mutual?"

"But it's not infidelity if you both agree to it. Infidelity is literally a breaking of faith and if you both agree then you're not breaking that faith." Elaine sounded almost exasperated, as if she wanted Jen to agree with her.

"But how would you feel if you knew that Mike was having sex with another woman?" returned Jen. Mike seemed almost startled that he had been included by name in the conversation.

"But it's not like that either; it's not 'another woman'." Elaine exaggerated the words, making quote marks in the air with her fingers. "It's the wife of the man that you're having sex with at the same time."

"Mmm I'll have to think about that one," smiled Jen defusing the tension a little. She put her hand on my thigh under the table and gave it a reassuring squeeze or maybe she just wanted the comfort of knowing that I was there, that my presence made it safe.

Mike and I had watched the exchange between Elaine and Jen with quiet fascination, our two wives arguing the point about fidelity and then Jen apparently almost conceding Elaine's point.

I had an erection under the table that was threatening to burst out of my pants and I was concerned that Jen would discover it. Would she be upset that I found the conversation arousing? We were discussing swapping and Jen wasn't just dismissing it out of hand. I guess every guy has had had the fantasy a few times but here we were openly talking about it or at least discussing it.

I shifted in my seat, trying to ease the pressure on my cock a little and I was sure that everyone noticed what I was doing.

"I think that the biggest danger would be jealousy." I felt that I had to add something to the conversation. "I mean it could be very easy for one partner to feel that the other was more attracted to the other person's partner or ..." I stopped, realising that I was making the point badly but the other three were waiting for me, waiting to hear what I had to say.

"No go on Bob." said Mike.

I took a slug of wine and cleared my throat. "Well supposing, just for the sake of argument, that it was the four of us, y'know swapping. I think there could be a real chance that Elaine could become jealous of Jen with you Mike," I gestured in his direction "or that I could become jealous of you with Jen, or some other combination. Do you see what I mean?"

Jen laughed. "By 'some other combination'," this time Jen used her fingers to make quote marks in the air "you don't mean me with Elaine do you? I know that you men get off on that fantasy."

She leant across the table and took Elaine's hand in a conspiratorial way. "If that happened we sisters would have to look out for each other." She winked at Elaine and we all laughed. I'd never heard Jen like this before. She's no prude for sure, we have a good bedroom repertoire but she is at heart a private person. Maybe she was changing, coming out of her shell.

"Yeah, yeah." I waved at the laughter. "But it's an important point." Suddenly we were quiet again and the personalisation of the conversation had brought us face to face with the reality of it.

"No you're right Bob." Mike came to my rescue. "But the only way to keep jealousy at bay is to be open, I mean completely open, everything shared, absolutely nothing hidden; jealousy feeds on imagined inequalities, on the perception that something is being withheld."

There'd been a pause in the conversation after that as each of us absorbed the truth of what Mike had said and the impossibility of surmounting that hurdle of openness. For me, and I'm sure it was true for Jen as well, I imagined how a conversation between us might go: "Honey, did you ever think about swinging, you know, wife swapping; do you think it might be fun, that we should give it a go?" I imagined the thoughts that would race through Jen's head: "My god he's trying to tell me he's having an affair" or "He's not happy with me, he wants someone else." Even if that's what we both wanted, how could we possibly risk broaching the subject without knowing that the other would be receptive to the suggestion?

Mike moved round the table topping up our drinks; he filled the glasses easily but when he came to Jen he paused and then poured the wine more slowly into her glass so that the trickling sound of the wine grabbed our attention. Into the silence he dropped the question that we had all been thinking: "Have you two ever thought about it? Swapping?" He continued to pour the wine, the trickling sensuous sound of the liquid filling the silence left by his question.

Jen broke the silence, laughing lightly as she answered to mask her discomfort. "Well no, never, have we hon?" turning to me and in that instant all of us knowing that we all had thought about it, thought about it a lot and were now thinking about it more seriously and the chance of the opportunity that presented itself.

Jen had fallen asleep on the drive home but woke as the car scrunched over the gravel of the drive. We didn't talk much as we got ready for bed, Jen in her nightie and me nude. That wasn't unusual; Jen had always been a chilly person, wanting more bed covers than me and then of course there was the usual fumbling under the covers and the sweet almost ritualistic surrender as Jen gave up her nightie and her body to our lovemaking. Then there were the nights when Jen came to bed naked, discarding her nightie in the bathroom and signalling her desire to have her own sexual needs satisfied but tonight we were both absorbed in our thoughts and had had enough to drink to make sleep come easily and quickly. We cuddled and kissed as we always did and then turned over to sleep.

I must have fallen asleep almost immediately but woke, disturbed by Jen's breathing. Instead of the slow, steady rhythm of sleep she seemed to be holding her breath and then releasing it in a series of little bursts before breathing in again with a gasp that she held. I was about to touch her shoulder and ask her if she was alright but then something else broke into my sleepy senses; there was a rhythmic sound from Jen's side of the bed and in the gloom of the bedroom I could just make out the covers on Jen's side moving in time with the sound.

I held my breath and lay as still as I could, at first not believing what my senses told me was happening but there was no doubt about it: Jen was masturbating and I knew in an instant that it was for her alone, that she wouldn't welcome any intrusion from me.

Of course I knew that Jen masturbated and she knew that I did. We masturbated together at home and when I'd been away on business trips we'd talk on the phone – steamy conversations, mutual masturbation separated by a hundred miles. I'd call Jen around ten in the evening when I knew that she'd be in bed after seeing to our then young children. "I miss you." I'd say. "I miss you too," she'd reply. "I can smell your smell on the pillow and if I touch myself I can imagine it's you, your hands caressing me, teasing me." and even though there was no way of knowing I knew for certain that she'd be stretching and arching as her hands ran over her breasts and belly, her nipples hardening in response to her own touch. "You're making me wet," she'd say. "You're making me hard," I'd reply and I'd lie on my back stroking my erection as I cradled the phone to my ear. "What are you doing right now?" "Stroking my cock, thinking of you. "Are you going to make yourself cum?" "Yes, and you?" "Mmm of course." "Are your fingers wet?" "Yes, wet and..." I'd hear her slurp as she lifted them to her mouth. "...wet and creamy." and then that little mewing sound as she explored her fold again and found her clitoris. "I'm cumming sweetie, cum with me" and I'd increase my speed, beating my meat for all I was worth. "Cumming, cumming..." "Me too...now..." and I'd cum, spurting my semen onto my chest and belly listening all the while as Jen's mewing turned to a series of little gasps as she orgasmed, the same little gasps that I could hear now as I lay besides her in the dark.

My cock hardened as I thought of her fingers wet with her juices and I held my bursting member as I listened. I wanted to stroke myself and cum with her but the difference was that tonight Jen wasn't masturbating with me, she was masturbating with someone else, someone imagined, perhaps an imagination fired by the conversation at dinner.

But who?

I lay still as Jen settled herself but I knew that she wasn't sleeping. I wanted desperately to move over to her, to lift her nightie and enter her from behind – spoons.

"You awake hon?" Jen wasn't moving but the sound of my voice seemed to freeze her; she had thought that I was asleep all the while. I moved over to her and snuggled into her, my cock nestled between her cheeks. The hem of her nightie was still up around her waist. "Don't know why but I just woke up feeling horny for you."

I could almost hear Jen's mind racing as she tried to guess whether I'd heard her masturbating. "Mmm that feels good." Jen wriggled her ass against my erection. "What woke you?"

"Oh I don't know but I'm glad that I did." I held my cock and moved it between her legs, feeling the slippery wetness there from her orgasm. She was still tense and I knew that she'd be wondering how to explain the state she was in but I said nothing and just eased myself into her. "You're wet; you feeling horny too?"

"I am now," she replied, pushing back to bury my cock in her.

We moved together in a familiar and comforting way but somehow I felt detached from her. What had she been thinking while she'd masturbated? Had she imagined herself with someone else? Was it Mike she was thinking of? Had the dinner conversation gone deeper than I'd thought?

I pulled at her hips, thrusting harder, wanting to reclaim her for myself.

"Hey, steady tiger." Jen changed her position a little. "Go easy hon."

Would Elaine say that? Elaine? Where the hell had that thought come from? Suddenly my mind was full of Elaine and it was Elaine that I was fucking and Elaine wouldn't say 'go easy'; she'd say 'fuck me Bob, fuck me'.

I eased up, slowing to a stop and we lay like that for a moment until Jen pulled off me, turning over to face me.

"You ok hon?" She stroked my face and kissed my forehead.

"Yeah, I'm ok, just a little more tired than I thought."

"Me too. Sleep well." She kissed me again and then turned over, settling her head into her pillow and then, as if to reassure me: "I do love you, always."

"I love you too Jen."

And we do love each other; but something had changed.



It was couple of weeks later when I bumped into Elaine in the mall. She had spotted me first and called out. "Hey Bob."

I turned and she was standing waving and smiling at me. "Hey, it's so good to see you." She came over and embraced me, perhaps a little effusively but nothing more than that. "We had such fun with you guys the other night, you are both such good company."

She took my arm as we walked and I offered to buy her a coffee.

"Look, I hope you don't think we were coming on to you at dinner."

"No, no, not at all. It was an interesting conversation."

"Wasn't it though? It made me horny as hell and I sure jumped on Mike after you two had gone."

I was a little taken aback at Elaine's openness but joined her laughter. I was aware that as we talked my mind was wandering and my penis stiffening, imagining being 'spoons' with her in bed. What would she be like and would she really say 'Fuck me Bob, fuck me' as I had imagined when I was in bed with Jen?

"We must get together again soon. Come over to our place. Why don't you call Jen and fix a date? I'll tell her we met." As I said the words I knew where I wanted this to go but how? Was Jen, my lovely loyal Jen, up for this as well?

Later, when I got home I told Jen about my meeting Elaine and she seemed really interested, even excited. "How was she?" she asked.

"Oh very bubbly. She's a real live wire and very attractive." Now why the hell did I add that? Was I trying subconsciously to push this along?

"Yes she is, isn't she, very attractive." There was no hint or tone in Jen's reply to suggest that she was uncomfortable with my remark. "In fact they are a very attractive couple, the two of them and good fun too," Jen continued. "I think that the four of us could become very good friends."

Was I reading something into this, wanting to hear an enthusiasm in Jen's voice which would lead us forward? We'd made love a few times since we spent the evening with Mike and Elaine and it was our usual warm and comfortable lovemaking. But there were moments when Jen seemed distracted, as if her mind was on something or someone else and I confess that my mind wandered as well. I'd catch myself concentrating on the sensation of my penis sliding in and out of Jen and trying to transfer the feeling as if I were making love with Elaine. Would Elaine feel like this? Would she feel hot and wet like Jen or tighter or looser or more aggressive or what? Was Jen doing the same as me, trying to experience my penis as if it were Mike's or someone else's?

Jen kept a vibrator in the drawer of her bedside cabinet and I checked it one morning. It worked fine but there was no way of telling if it had a new battery. I noted its position in the drawer and then checked a couple of days later. It was in a different place which must mean that Jen had been using it. Well maybe she'd always used it during the day – I'd never checked before.

Never checked!

What was happening here? Doubt and suspicion seemed to be creeping into our marriage and here I was spying on my wife. Was I jealous of Jen's vibrator or just very excited that she was using it, wanting to believe that it might be a precursor to something with Mike and Elaine? I knew this couldn't go on. I had to do something.

Jen was at the sink rinsing the coffee maker as I readied to go to work. I stood behind her and put my arms around her, pressing my semi erect penis against her butt. That was another thing; I seemed to have an erection most of the time nowadays.

"Do you know how much I love you and what a very sexy lady you are?"

"Hey that's nice honey. And you're a very sexy guy too." She turned her head so that I could kiss her as she wriggled her butt against my now fully erect penis. "Now is that all for me or are you saving it for someone else?"

I was stunned at Jen's words. Was she suggesting something here? I decided to play along with her.

"Well it's all for you if you want it but I'm sure there are other ladies who might fancy a bit of your handsome husband." I was intrigued to see where this would lead.

"Oh really?" Jen made a show of snapping off her marigolds, turning as she did so that we were now facing each other. She put her hands on my butt and pulled me into her, grinding herself against my erection. "And what about the guys out there who fancy a piece of your very sexy wife?"

"Which other guys do you have in mind?" Our eyes were locked and we were smiling at each other. It was still a game, but only just.

"Well I got the distinct impression that Mike took a shine to me the other evening and I don't think you were disappointed with Elaine, were you?"

So was that it? Was it Mike that had grabbed Jen's attention? But I still wasn't sure. I tried again.

"Ah I see. That conversation at dinner hey? Is my lovely wife thinking of joining the swinging set?"

I'd thrown down the gauntlet; what would Jen say now?

"Well I don't think I'm the only one in this family that got excited at dinner that night. You had a boner that was threatening to bust your pants didn't you?" She grinned broadly at this and slipped her hand down between us, holding my now rigid cock through the fabric of my pants. "We've been together long enough for me to know what you're doing when you try to shift your pants to make yourself more comfortable. In any case, there was a wet patch the size of a quarter on the front of your pants. You think I didn't notice, or Elaine?" She let go of me and gave me a playful smack on my butt. "Anyway, enough. You've got to go to work and I have things to do here at home," she kissed me and added "and if you still have that boner when you get home there's a lady right here that could use some of it and that's a promise!"

I don't think I was much use at anything at work that day. My secretary asked me a couple of times if I was ok, if there was something on my mind. And of course there was. My mind was filled with thoughts and images of me with Elaine and of Jen with Mike and the more I thought about it the hornier I became; I had this vivid image of me having Elaine from behind – spoons – while we watched Mike and Jen really getting it on. My cell phone beeped: I had an SMS message from Jen: 'I'm in the bedroom. Call me'.