Best Friends Forever

His finger penetrated her anus and she grimaced at his assault.

"You okay?" He said.

"Yes, just be gentle back there," she said. She pulled him down onto the coverlet. They rolled together for some time exploring, kissing, licking and sucking on this or that part of each the other.

Finally, he forced her onto her back and insinuated a knee between her thighs. Surrendering, she spread wide for her assailant and waited for what must inevitably come.

He loomed above her his cock brittle hard. He lowered himself slowly to her pussy and pushed at her still somewhat dry nether lips. She grunted her femaleness.

He pumped into her slowly. He felt her shiver; it was his signal to go for it, and he did. He drove into her like a wild man taking his she. Her eyes glistened with passion with maybe a few tears for her about to be ex-husband mixed in. But, in spite of the tears, there was no guilt, or, at least not very much guilt.

He stiffened unburdening himself of a sea of cum. The moment was frozen in time. She would remember it in future days: the doing of each other in Jimmy's bed, and her bed. Yes, it was a watershed moment for her: the moment she fully realized that she was now someone else's woman.

The next days would be days of emotional transition for her and for him.

The few weeks that followed turned out to be calm ones. They'd learned that Jimmy had spent a ragged weekend in jail and had finally been rescued by his old bud Sammy Gilchrist. Rodney wanted to talk to the man, Sammy. He would at some point, but for the moment things would be allowed to simmer.

******

She was actually nervous. She'd made the call some half an hour earlier. He'd be with her in but a few more minutes at most of that she was sure.

She heard the car pulling up into the driveway. Her fingers were tapping an irregular staccato on the counter top.

"Hi," he said, announcing his presence as he strode across the largish kitchen to the serving bar.

"Hi," she said. Her tone was somber.

"Huh? What's going on Claire?" he said, reacting to her tone.

"We're pregnant, and yes it's yours," she said. The stunned look on his face could only have been described as comical by any casual observer. Then he smiled.

"You're sure?" he said, "I mean that it's ours, yours and mine?"

"Yes, he pulled out as usual the last time we did it. We hadn't made the decision to have children yet, and with you not using the condom that time that he caught us in the act and since then. Well, like I say there is no doubt," she said. He nodded.

"Well then it's definitely time for a celebratory night out," he said. "This might be the happiest day of my life. It is for damn sure one of them!"

"Well, I'm glad you're so happy," she said. "At any rate, we've got ourselves some seven months to go."

He went to her and kissed her long and lovingly. It occurred to him that his ex-best friend was not going to be thrilled with the news when he heard it. Well, it had been his choice, and it was a damn shame, he thought.

******

It was almost a year now since the end of my marriage to Claire Woodrew. I was at my usual station tilting one back just as my bud Sammy took the stool beside me. "How yuh doin' sport?" he said.

I shrugged. "Eight or ten more of these and I should be cool," I said.

"You're drinking too much," said Sammy. "And yeah, I know I'm not one to talk, but you make me look like a junior high school kid."

"Yeah, well I'm depressed," I said in defense of myself.

"You know I've been dating Colleen Watson, that nurse I introduced you to," he said.

"Yeah, Colleen, right," I said. "You guys getting serious?"

"Jury's still out, but maybe. She knows your story and she knows your ex-bud, Rodney. Anyway, he was in the hospital last week, she recognized him."

"Oh, uh, so what?" I said.

"He was there with your ex. They have a kid," said Sammy. I know my face fell. I actually started to cry; I could feel it."

"Sorry guy, but I figured you'd wanna know," said Sammy.

"Yeah, yeah," I said. I threw a ten down on the bar and rose to go. I had to get out of there before I actually embarrassed myself publicly.

I had my car. But, I just started to walk home: it was a four mile trek, and I didn't give a shit. This was the livin' end!

******

I woke up to the pounding on my apartment door. It was Sammy and Henry Goodman, my other bud from Allied. Henry'd been the number three guy in HR for the past couple of years. He was a bit older than me and Sammy but in our group at the Crossroads.

"What the . . ." I started.

"You left your car at the Crossroads. Wanna go get it?" said Sammy.

"Huh? Oh yes, okay, yeah I guess," I said. "But did you have to wake me up so early?" I was whining but he knew the score so he didn't react.

"Yeah, well like I said last night; you drink too much," he said. Henry was nodding but not offering anything.

"Well, come in and have a cup while I get some clothes on. You know where the coffee maker is," I said.

The ride back to the Crossroads was mostly quiet. I say mostly. As Henry, whose car we'd used, pulled up next to mine, Sammy made a comment.

"Bud, you've gotta let her go. She's gone; it's time to get on with things, new things, new women. Okay?" he said.

"Yeah, I guess," I said. "It's just hard. Here I am almost twenty-eight years-old and starting over. It's hard, like I say."

"Yeah, I know," said Sammy.

"Me too," said Henry. "My wife dumped me for a bigger dick five years ago. I'm mostly over it now. At least we didn't have any kids; that would not have been good."

"Yeah, well same here," I said. "And yes, you're right, that would not have been good. I guess we should count our blessings."

"There you go," said Sammy, agreeing with us. "Like I said, time to be getting on with things and dumping all of the baggage." I nodded.

Driving back to my place, I was thinking of all of the undoubted happiness around the Pollard residence. I sighed. Maybe there was a woman out there that I could maybe trust to be my woman, and maybe even have a kid with. I wasn't too old, not yet. I began to feel a little good, but the good was definitely mixed with the ever present melancholy.

******

"You think he knows we've got a little girl?" she said. He shrugged.

"I don't know. I kinda hope not. It'd just be something else for him to focus on," said Rodney. She nodded.

"Yes, that's true. Still, he's bound to find out sooner or later. I just hope he's moved on when that happens," she said.

"Yes, that would be best. I do hope he's done that, moved on I mean. I mean it has been a year now," he said.

"Do you think . . .?"

"No," he said. "He's made it plain that he doesn't want us around. We did our best, given the circumstances, to try and make things right by him. Going to see him or trying again would not be useful." She sighed. "Claire, if he comes to us, we will do what we reasonably can, we will, but it has to be him coming to us."

"I guess you're right," she said. They turned toward the hallway.

"The baby's awake," said Claire. She was smiling.

"Feeding time or potty time?" he said.

"Feeding time, silly. She doesn't cry like that for potty time," said momma. Her husband smiled and raised his arms in surrender.

"Me or you?" he said.

"Why you darling. I think she called your name," said Claire. He smirked.

"Okay, sounds like an offer I can't refuse," he said.

He headed down the hall to take care of his daughter's clamor. He lived for moments like this. Rodney Pollard was a lucky man, always had been. But this lucky? Nobody deserved to be this lucky, as lucky as he was. The prettiest girl in the state for a wife, the prettiest baby in the whole world, money, position: no, nobody had a right to be this lucky, he thought.

As he picked up his daughter he thought about his once upon a time best friend. For a brief moment the guilt that had faded from his conscious mind since the last meeting with his onetime bud, returned. The baby's murmuring in her daddy's arms brought him back on center. He retrieved the bottle from the warmer near her bed. He settled in for a feeding time with the other love of his life, Rebecca Pollard age going-on-one. No, no one had the right to be this lucky.

CHAPTER 3:

Sammy was right; I did drink too much, but I didn't give a damn. I needed to drink and to drink often. And why the hell not, John Daniels loved me. I wonder what they'd named the baby. I wondered if it were a boy or a girl. I guess it didn't matter; I'd never be meeting it—him, her.

It was strange it was. I couldn't get the kid out of my mind. I couldn't get the two of them out of my mind either. The way they'd done me. Was I jealous even after a year? I guess I was and bitter too. I needed my woman. The kid should've been mine. My best friend? Well fuck him!

Work was a pain anymore. I hated my job, my nothing job. Well, maybe it wasn't such a nothing job, just not any kind of job that meant anything to my gold digger ex-wife. I wondered if they ever thought about me. Probably did. Likely felt sorry for me. That was why the two of them had tried to get me to be friends again I supposed. Friends with my own wife, ex-wife! Would've been a first. Maybe one for Guinness.

At any rate drinking was good, very good. And Marie and Jackie loved me. They were my friends. I'd talked to them a lot, maybe more than even Sammy. Hmm, well it was close that one. I did talk to Sammy a ton; Sammy understood my pain, and he did sympathize, sometimes too much.

"Let's get a booth," said Sammy and Henry coming up to me and nudging me off of my stool.

"Shit, Sammy, you scared the heck outta me," I said.

"Come on, sport," said Henry. "The seats are better over there." I shrugged, picked up my JD and followed them over to the line of booths against the far wall that bordered the smallish dance floor.

I plopped down on the padded bench to the right; my buds took the one across from me.

"You guys interrupted what was working out to be a perfectly good evening of depression," I said, not exactly smirking when I said it.

"Yeah, well, what the hey, we're here to make your evening even more of a downer," said Sammy.

"Yeah, well thank you for that," I said.

"Let me interrupt this truly wonderful moment of morbidity," said Henry.

I tilted my glass indicating he should feel free.

"Jimmy, you've gotta stop being late so much at work. Charlie's been cutting you some slack these past months because he knows how hard your breakup with Claire has been on you. He went through the same thing and completely understands, but his boss is starting to ride him. Anyway, that's why we are both here tonight," said Henry.

"Hmm, passing along the message, that it?" I said. Sammy nodded.

"Yeah kinda," said Henry.

"Okay, message received," I said.

"There's something else," said Sammy.

"Something else?" I said.

"Yeah, Colleen saw your ex again the other day. She came in with her daughter for the kid's periodic checkup, I guess. Anyway that's what Colleen said," said Sammy. I looked down.

"Daughter?" I said. I'd wondered since I'd heard they'd had a kid whether it was a boy or a girl; now I knew.

"Yeah, a little girl," said Sammy.

"She shoulda been mine," I whispered. "She'd be what now, maybe a year old?"

"Jim, I'll say it again, you've gotta get over her, them. There's a woman out there just waiting for you to make her day. But no woman wants a guy with the baggage you've been carrying around," said Henry.

I nodded, I knew he was right, but that didn't change my mood an iota. "Yeah, I know," I said. I took another sip of my JD.

The conversation turned to other topics over the next while. I guess I was paying attention. Every once in a while one or the other of my buds would laugh or slap one the other on the back. I smiled a lot, I was sure of that much. I contributed the truth that my USC Trojans were better than Henry's Texas Longhorns; well, he was originally from Amarillo, so I guess he had no choice.

We got out of there, the Crossroads, at a bit past midnight and it was Friday night, actually Saturday morning now. I had my car, but I decided to walk home, again. One, I was seriously drunk; and two, I needed to think and walking did that for me. Hell it was only four miles.

An hour and a half later I tried my key; it still worked. There's an upside to everything.

I hated the idea of being around the woman, but at the same time, I needed to be, was desperate to be. What the hell was that about! I sure as hell didn't know. I resigned myself to another night of being alone and lonely and desperate for a woman's touch, a woman's love. I needed those badly and I had no hope of getting any. Well, I had no hope of getting any from the woman I most wanted to get it from.

Sammy and Henry's words came back to me. Go find me another fish in the sea? Maybe, I guess I had to try. Living like I was twern't no good, no good for anything or anybody. Yeah, I guess I had to make the effort. Who knows maybe down the line I'd have me a daughter or son of my own; wouldn't that be the cat's meow! I wonder what the two of them would think of that. I snickered, even though nobody was around to see me snicker, probably look down on me and mine; that was the probable answer to that question.

******

I'd just gotten done delivering a load to Franklin's Super Store, a grocery outlet with sixteen locations throughout the state; it was actually near my apartment at the Randall, maybe half a mile away.

I was sitting down at Mary's Diner across the street from the drop when he pulled up a chair across from me. I hadn't even gotten my corned beef, and the sonovabitch was sitting across from me staring; well, I thought he was staring.

"And just what the fuck does my worst enemy in the whole world want now. And how the fuck did you know where to find me!" I said.

"In reverse order: I happened to be here for lunch too; pure coincidence. As for being your worst enemy, I'm not, you are," he said.

""Hmm, I don't believe your number one, and I sure as hell differ with you per your number two. So, now that we've settled those matters you can fucking leave. I need to eat and I need to make a living and you're standing in the way of both," I said.

"Look Jim, let's talk a bit. Would that be all right? I'm not here to cause you any trouble or grief. Really I'm not," he said.

For whatever reason, I shrugged; it was shrug tinged with bitterness, and I'm sure he got the message, but it was a shrug nevertheless. "Get to it," I said.

The man across from me sighed, as well he might. "Would it be all right if I bought me a cup of coffee?" he said.

"Yeah, but don't plan on staying long. I really don't feel good about you being here coincidence or not," I said. He signaled the waitress who was just passing by.

My lunch arrived at the same time as his coffee. How fucking timely, I thought.

"We miss you, Jim. I know it sounds self-serving, but it's the truth. And by we I do mean the both of us. Yeah, me and Claire screwed up. But . . ." he said, and paused.

"But?" I said.

"Jim don't take this wrong. But Claire and I were meant to be together. You got there first and put in your bid. She was ready to be married and she, all too quickly, said yes; and then you were married, and you were my best friend, and I planned to stay the hell outta the way but . . . Then you two got back from your honeymoon and she was so beautiful, and well, I put a move on her.

"It turned out she wanted me too, Jim. Weird ass as it seems she wanted the both of us. She and I made a pact. I'd get to have her sometimes, and I'd be there to cover the both of you financially and such . . ."

"What the fuck!" I said.

"Let me finish, please," he said. For the life of me I shut up for the moment, and no, I don't know why. I shut up, but I could feel my face twitching in anger at the very sound of his condescending voice, attitude.

"Yes, we made a deal to play on the side and be all one big happy family and all of that. You'd get to be married to her and be there twenty-four-seven, and I'd be there in the wings in case either of you ever needed anything. And, if you had children, I'd have been their godfather, and well, that's pretty much it except for one thing," he said.

"Huh? What one thing?" I said.

"Well, this meet up, and it is a coincidence, is kind of fortuitous," he said.

"Fortuitous? What? What are you talking about?" I said.

"Jim, I don't know if you know it or not—we've been apart for more than a year now—but Claire and I have a daughter. Rebecca is her name. We've decided to have her baptized. We'd be honored if you would be willing to be her godfather. I mean for real, my friend," he said.

I stared at him for a long moment. "Huh?" I said.

"It would be a real thing for us, not just some ceremonial thing if you know what I mean.

"We want you in our lives, Jim. The both of us want you in our lives. Claire especially wants to make good by you," he said.

"Yeah, but you'll still be in her bed and I'd still have my cold sheets to comfort me at night," I said. "No, it won't work. Some of the bitterness at what the two of you have done to me has faded, but the hurt and the emotional scars will likely never go away, not entirely no matter how much time goes by.

"In case there is any doubt in your mind ex-best friend, I still want and need my woman, the woman who is now your woman. And, I need her to be a one man woman. But, I can't ever have her again and I know it. And the realization of that makes it all but impossible for me to even look at another woman, or, be around my woman, Claire. She was and always will be my all, my everything, my irreplaceable life's love.

"So go back to her and sleep with her and, when you do, think of me wishing it was me. I want you to do that. And for that and for that alone I am so glad you happened to just coincidentally bump into me today. It was worth seeing you just so I could deliver that message. Yes it was," I said.

"Jimmy, you gotta cut me and Claire some slack. If not today, sooner or later you just have to. And, as for you not being able to be around other women, that's just plain crazy. You're a good lookin' guy with prospects and friends and a good heart. Yes a heart that Claire and I broke. We are fully aware of that. But you need to get it together and find that special girl the one that will make you forget your Claire and be your new heart's delight.

"Anyway, when you're ready please . . ." he said, leaving his meaning clear but hanging in the air.

"No," I said. He nodded, rose, and left. I think he was breaking up. I'd finally made an impact.

******

Sammy, as stated before, had been more than happy to inform me, more than once, that I'd been drinking too much. But, after my meet up with my ex-best friend Rodney Pollard, I began to drink at truly Olympian levels. Yes indeed, if drinking were an Olympic sport, I would have been more than a candidate for a gold medal.

And, my venue of choice, you guessed it, the Crossroads. Well, it had a certain sentimental allure for me.

The problem of thinking is that it is not always possible to not think of the things one doesn't want to think about. Trust me on that one; I know it as a great truth.

I was musing, which is another word for thinking, about what Sammy and Henry had said about finding me another fish in the sea to make my day. Similarly, I was musing about my recent—two days gone—run in with my worst enemy which had done nothing for me except remind me that I had no one to love and nothing I really gave a damn about. One might appreciate how the two musings complemented each the other.

I was nervous and not too drunk, not yet. I was going to go for it. I was going to ask a lady in attendance to dance. And, if I wasn't turned down, I was going to ask the lady for a date. Did I say I was nervous? Well, I should have if I didn't.