Best Laid Plans Ch. 06-07

"This looks pretty," he said picking out a green eye shadow I used when I wanted to look like Cher.

My senses came back online and I closed the bathroom door so as not to let the children hear us fight, "ARE YOU A FUCKING NUT?"

"Callie, calm down. Breathe. I've done plenty of websites before and your secret identity is safe. Besides, most of the money is made from advertisements. You'll be a like a super hero. Callie Cronin, barmaid by night and erotic temptress by day." Wait, that didn't make sense. Super heroes moonlighted, it wasn't their day job. I pushed the make-up into his hands and shook my head.

"If you're so into this, why don't you jack off for the world to see?" Jeff took both of my shoulders with his man hands. I was being man-handled. I hate being man-handled. He took a deep breath as if in preparation to give some sort of presidential speech. This better be good.

"Because. . ., you will be representing woman, just like you all over the country. There are thousands of women out there who have never experienced an orgasm, just think about how long it took you to figure out how to get one. Most men have only seen what they know on porn and they need to know there is more to the screams and thrashing around. They need to know that there are contractions and squeezing and that glorious liquid that comes out of you. If we do this right, you'll be more like a tutorial then a porn star. But mostly you'll just get a bunch of guys off every day." I rolled my eyes. In truth, that wasn't a bad argument. But it doesn't justify Long Duck Dong filming me.

I sat down on the toilet with my head between my knees waiting for the insanity to kick in, "I'm going to need more than green eye shadow."

"That's my girl." Jeff clapped his hands together and we proceeded to turn Eliza Doolittle into a tramp.