Best Moment to Nightmare and Back

It even got to the point that if I dated a woman more than twice, I had to take her to meet my "family." As much as anything, I didn't have the confidence in my picking ability anymore, but I also trusted Butch and Sundance to be able to pick up on things that might fly right by me. They were as vigilant at watching my back as sisters.

Life was rolling on with its ups and downs but in general was pretty good a few years later when I got a phone call from Butch that she and Sundance needed to see me about something pretty big. Now considering I was seeing them several times a week and they could talk to me anytime, anywhere, about anything, I really began to worry that this really was going to be something very big. My heart sank thinking that maybe one of them was really sick. Anyway, we actually made an appointment for me to meet them at their house on the next Saturday.

Four days of fretting had me on edge when I arrived at their house Saturday afternoon at 2. Butch, looking beautiful as ever, greeted me at the door with a somber face and led me into their den, where an equally somber faced, and equally beautiful Sundance, already sat. Sundance offered me a drink, but I was way too nervous to be drinking before whatever terrible thing they were going to tell me. Butch sat down on the sofa next to Sundance, and I sat in the La-Z-Boy just off to the side.

Sundance began, "Sam, we know this is going to sound a little weird, but we want you to listen carefully to what we have to ask you, and if you want to pass on this we will understand and it won't impact our relationship with you in any way ...

"Sam," Butch cut in, wringing her hands and sliding forward to the edge of her seat, "Sundance and I want to have a baby, and we would like you to be the father. We can't think of a finer man to be our child's father than you ...

"Hell yes!" I interrupted, prompting both of them to jump back in their seats a bit. "I'd be honored to donate my sperm to you two! God, I really thought one of you was really sick and you were going to tell me someone was dying! Whew!"

The girls looked at each other and smiled, then back at me.

"We don't want you to just be the sperm donor, Sam," Sundance replied. "We want you to physically impregnate one of us, do it the old-fashioned way, and when the baby is born we would still like you to stay in our lives and help, as 'Uncle Sam'.

"Whoa," was all I could mutter in my shocked state. "I think I need that drink now."

The girls explained the whole plan to me over a bottle of Don Julio tequila. I would sleep with each of them twice a week - on different days - while the other was in the room, until one of them got pregnant. A contract would be drawn up, giving them full parental rights but acknowledging me as the birth father, and while they would raise the child, they still wanted me around to provide extra love and support, and be the "expert" on any number of things that might arise that would take the insight of a man. We got along so well, and they had seen how great I get along with my daughter, that they thought I'd be the perfect man for the job, so to speak.

"And the sex thing, while it might be a little weird, would be a perk of the job until one of us gets pregnant," Butch noted. "Don't tell us you've never thought about that. You're a man."

The two of them grinned like Cheshire cats while I sat in my chair and stammered. It probably took me a full minute to be able to get a clear thought in my head before I could speak, but then I asked, "Are you two really sure about this? I don't want to lose my two best friends over this, and I certainly don't want to get in the middle of you two - figuratively in this case."

"We've been discussing this for months, Sam," Sundance added, "And we think we're solid enough on our end to handle this. But you know how you men get sometimes ..."

"This might seem crazy, but I have one request when it comes to the sex part. Do I get to engage you two completely or just do the act? From all accounts, I'm pretty good at it, and if we're going to go this far, I might as well give you EVERYTHING I've got."

They both giggled and nodded in agreement. We finished the rest of the Don Julio.

We set up Monday and Friday for me and Butch, and Tuesday and Thursday for me and Sundance. I wasn't going to look for sex from anyone else during this time period, either, because I figured I would need all the strength I was going to be able to muster just for my two friends. They both reminded me, as well, that even though they were lesbians, they did have heterosexual experience, and to their recollections, nobody ever complained after a night with either one. No pressure, ladies.

So on the first night of our plan, I have to admit I was as scared as I was when I lost my virginity at 15. These are my two best friends, practically sisters to me, and we were supposed to be having sex for procreation first, fun second. I don't know about the ladies, but I was sure sweating big bullets.

I met the ladies for dinner at their house on the first night, just something light and easy. Then we retired to their guest bedroom, where the bed was made up and a chair was discreetly placed in sight of the bed but off to one side, almost at the back of the room. Butch was first up, and after we awkwardly stripped, we laid down on the bed while Sundance went to the chair. Butch is a beautiful woman, with perfect 38 DD breasts, a tight ass and great legs, but the weirdness of the situation got to me, and I couldn't get hard.

"Do you mind if I get myself ready with some foreplay on your body? I know I'm nothing wonderful and not your gender of choice, but I've got to do something to get myself ready," I said. "Normally, the sight of a naked woman does the trick for me, but I've got to admit I'm weirded out."

Butch looked at Sundance, who shrugged in agreement. I started at Butch's mouth, with light kisses, then deeper ones, and when she started responding I started playing with her big boobs. I then worked my left hand down her body and lightly flicked my fingers across her pussy while sucking on her left breast. That got a moan and a lubricating reaction from her pussy, so I plunged in with my fingers and did my thing. Twenty minutes and six loud orgasms later, I slid down between her legs with my face and started eating her pussy, which got my head scissored between her legs as she tried to push her clit down my throat. She started to buck like a horse and almost cut off my air supply completely on the seventh orgasm of the night, then I got her three more times before she felt like she was getting tired.

At that point, I licked my way back up her body, which made her giggle like a schoolgirl, before planting a sloppy kiss with her juices on my lips and face right on her mouth. She tried to suck my tongue out of my head at that point, and while she was doing that I slid my rock hard dick into her waiting pussy. She was hot and sloppy, and I pumped her good for 15 minutes before blowing my load. She didn't come on my cock, although she seemed happy enough with my member, but overall I think she enjoyed the experience as much as I did. For my part, I came about as hard as I had since I was married to Traci, and I gently collapsed on top of her and slowly rolled over alongside of her. As is my custom, I laid with my body up against her, enjoying the feeling of her panting and lightly sweating. She laid there in silence, looking at me while her breathing slowly returned to normal.

"Damn, that was amazing!" she suddenly exclaimed. "This boy eats pussy as good as a girl does!"

I heard Sundance giggle from the chair. I honestly forgot she was back there, I got so intense.

"Was this just a one-off trying to impress me?" Butch asked as she slowly rose and got off the bed.

"This is what I always do when I have the time and the motivation," I replied.

"Wow, and women let you get away."

With that she walked over to Sundance and the two kissed, then hugged. Sundance then leaned over and licked each of Butch's hard nipples.

"I already can't wait for your turn tomorrow," Butch whispered to Sundance.

I got up, went to their guest bathroom, cleaned myself up, and got dressed. Sundance was leading Butch tenderly by the hand to their bedroom, so I let myself out quietly.

Sundance's turn came the next night, and while the whole scenario was still kind of weird, I think we were all a little more comfortable than the first night. I did almost the exact same thing to Sundance that I had done to Butch, with almost the exact same results. We then lay side by side and cuddled as we recovered before Sundance finally spoke.

"Oh my," she said softly. "Are you sure you aren't a lesbian?"

We repeated these scenarios for almost four months before Butch reported that she had missed her period two weeks back. So we set a time for Butch to take a home pregnancy test, with me being included in the festivities. The test came back positive, and both women wept with happiness. That set me off as well. I have to admit I was very proud of myself.

Of course that ended the sex with my friends, as per the agreement, but not before I got to take each woman one more time. Damn, they are both goddesses, and I told them so.

"Maybe I've been looking in the wrong places all these years," I told them.

They smiled. We hugged.

The girls invited me into the delivery room for the big day. It had been nine years since I last stepped into a delivery room, and that day didn't turn out so great for me. This time, however, there were no surprises, and William Sam was born without a hitch. Yes, I even got second billing on the name. The girls decided to name the baby after their fathers if it was a boy, but since both fathers had the same name, William, they asked if I would mind if they named the middle name after me. Again, I was incredibly honored, although I asked for the shortened version because in truth, I really hate the name "Samuel."

So now I had two children to keep track of. Life was good. Butch and Sundance included me in on almost every important, semi-important, somewhat important, and even not important events in Billy's life. As for the three of us, our friendship just got deeper and stronger.

And although we didn't tell Anna about the intricacies of our arrangement, she was included in many of Billy's events as well, when she was with me, because she had bonded with Butch and Sundance almost as deeply as I had. For all intents and purposes, she looked upon Billy as her little brother, which in truth, he actually was.

By this point, she and I rarely talked about Traci and Anna's other family. When she was with me, it was all about us and our family, and she caught on to that pretty quickly. She did mention a few things which caught my ears, such as Traci and Victor not being as much fun as Traci and I were when we were together, and she occasionally mentioned some of the great vacations they had taken through the years. While I was doing well and had taken Anna on some great vacations, Victor was a star at his firm and earned an incredible sum of money. He and Traci and the kids had moved to the ritzy side of the city a few years ago, lived well at home and took great vacations. Truthfully, I was glad that they could provide my daughter with the best of everything, especially considering she lived most of the time with them.

Traci and I barely communicated with each other, more my choice than hers, except when we had to coordinate something for Anna or for certain special occasions where I had to join them. Those were kept to a minimum, however, as we usually did our birthdays and Christmases separately.

++++++++++

Fast forward another six years. I had taken a date to one of our city's most exclusive restaurants, the Golden Peacock. I really liked this woman, we had been dating for about six months, Butch and Sundance both liked her, and I had gotten a hell of good bonus at work for a big project that I led to a successful conclusion. This was going to be a great night, or so I anticipated.

So we're sitting there at our table over the first few drinks and appetizers when I happened to scan the room, and who do I see sitting off to my right in a darkened corner but Traci's Victor - and he's holding hands with a woman. Not Traci. A younger woman. A pregnant younger woman. A pregnant younger woman wearing a wedding ring. A pregnant younger woman wearing a wedding ring who could have been Traci's double 15 years ago.

I almost choked on the mushroom cap I was eating at the time. I apologized to my date and headed off to the lobby of the restaurant. Finding a quiet spot, I pulled out my phone and called my 22-year-old daughter.

"Annie-la," I said, calling her by my pet nickname, "Are your mother and Victor still together? Are they having any trouble?"

"No, Daddy, why?" she answered. "What's wrong?"

"Goddammit!" I growled into the phone. "Call Butch and tell her to meet me at the police station, and tell you mother to meet me at the Golden Peacock!"

I hung up and headed straight for Victor's table. He was too busy to notice me until I was alongside his table. Then, as he turned to see me, I cold-cocked him with a right to the left side of his face, catching more head than I wanted to and breaking my hand. Didn't care. He recoiled back in his chair, and before he could move I grabbed his head in my hands and rammed his face down into the table, breaking his nose and essentially knocking him out.

While everyone kind of sat there stunned, I yelled at Victor's date to hand me her phone. After a second of hesitation, she did as she was told. While the restaurant manager cautiously approached, I scanned her speed dial numbers quickly, found what I was looking for, and hit dial. While I kept the manager and another customer at bay, I yelled into the phone, "I just cold-cocked the son a bitch who's been fucking your wife! She's at the Golden Peacock right now!"

The manager was reluctant to tangle with what he perceived to be a madman, and the customer who came over to help followed his lead and kind of stayed in the background. A couple of other customers were tending to Victor, who had groggily woken up and was bleeding all over the place.

I walked over and apologized to my date, gave her cab fare home and paid for the food we had eaten up until that point. The police showed up a few minutes later, as did a tearful and confused Traci. She immediately ran up to Victor, who acknowledged he was okay, then she came at me hard, calling me every name under the sun, starting with "son of a bitch."

"You might just want to thank me, and save the name-calling for Dickhead," I shot back. "Didn't you notice the younger version of yourself hanging around in the background. That's his playdate for tonight, or did you forget how you two first hooked up."

"You mean that pregnant girl is ..."

"Yup, and as far as I can tell, she's about four to six months along. Probably hasn't told her husband yet, hoping the baby doesn't look like Victor."

"Hoping what baby doesn't look like Victor?" I heard a voice behind me say.

I turned to see a rather large guy standing behind me, looking confused and angry.

"Are you the guy who called me about my cheating whore wife?"

"I'm the guy who called, and that's the guy who your wife has been fucking," I said, pointing to Victor. "I'm sorry to have to tell you that, but now you can have the baby DNA tested before it's born, or before you're standing in the delivery room and your wife delivers an Oriental kid. Been there, done that, about 19 years ago."

At that he grabbed his pregnant wife's arm and started to drag her from the restaurant. One of the cops at the scene, however, told him to be gentle, or risk spending some time in jail in the cell next to mine.

At that point I was handcuffed, read my rights and taken to an awaiting police cruiser for the ride to the police station. The police were very careful in handling me, not sure if I wasn't a raving maniac from the quick beating I had given Victor.

Butch was already down at the police station waiting for me when we got there. She quickly bonded me out on a battery charge since I didn't have any arrest record, and then we headed for an emergency room for my broken hand.

"So what the fuck set you off like that," Butch asked me point blank as we drove.

"When I saw that fucker holding her hand and that girl looked like a young version of Traci, I knew immediately what was going down," I answered. "If his 'MO' holds true, I'm betting he is her boss, and she's smitten with him. Well, I've seen that once already, and that fucker wasn't getting a second free pass.

"By the way, did you see the size of that girl's husband? He has to be 6-4, 275. God I hope he makes Victor pay in blood equity!"

Butch put her hand on my arm to calm me down.

"You did a pretty good job of that yourself, Rocky," she chided me. "Maybe if we plead 'sudden heat' you'll just get off with community service, although once you put your hands on your ex-wife's husband that kind of changed the game."

"I wish somebody had done that for me all those years ago," I stated.

"You still love her, don't you? That's why you went after Victor so hard?" Butch queried.

"I guess to some extent I always will love her," I responded. "I don't like it when loved ones are hurt, even former loved ones."

Butch, Sundance, and Billy came over to the house the next day, Sunday, to give me a hand while I was getting used to having my right hand in a cast. Anna also showed up to help in the early afternoon, and brought with her news of what went down between Traci and Victor when they got back to the house. She said the scene got ugly, and Traci threw the bum out of the house.

"Apparently she doesn't like it when the shoe's on the other foot," Sundance observed.

Perhaps it's a good thing I never really pissed off Traci too badly when we were married, because she certainly didn't take this incident well. After throwing Dickhead out of the house, she called over to his company and talked to the president about Victor's indiscretions with employees - herself included - which were against company policy. Facing an irate Traci and seeing the shape I had left Victor in, the company decided it couldn't take the negative publicity and terminated him immediately, with very few benefits kept. Sundance got that news through her connections, and relayed it to me over dinner soon after at my house. That was more than fine with me.

As for me, I wound up in a cell for five days and got 100 hours of community service. My jail time from work was unpaid leave of absence, because while my boss privately told me he was pleased with how I handled things, from a corporate standpoint he couldn't condone my actions. I completely understood.

++++++++++

Three years later, I'm sitting at a table at The Royal Crown when a familiar presence comes up behind me, puts her hand on my shoulder and asks me if she can sit down. I turned to face my ex-wife, who still looked good at 54, and said "Why not?"

As she sat down opposite me, I noticed that she had put on about 20 pounds in the 22 years we had been divorced, with probably half that weight settling in her boobs. She had a few wrinkles here and there, but otherwise she was still attractive. She wore a tight pink lowcut sweater over jeans, hardly the look of someone who's been living the good life for the past two decades.

"So how did you find me? Hiding out in a lesbian bar has almost always worked well for me."

She giggled; that same girlish giggle she has always had.

"Your daughter knows where you hide, remember. I asked, and she told me. She also told me to be careful, because if I fucked with you here, Butch or Sundance would break my legs."