"Best Wife Ever!" 12 Days of Sexmas


As I arrived at the table, I heard a chubby brunette say, "And number one would be Matt Damon."

"Number one in what?" I asked, interrupting their girl talk.

All the girls broke out laughing. My wife stood up, walked over to me and kissed me hard. When she broke the kiss, she turned to her friends and announced, "He is my number one."

"Bull shit, that is not allowed," cried out a very tipsy Jenna, Alexis's best friend, and a raving beauty. "You have to announce yours in front of your husband for cheating, Alexis."

Alexis smiled, "Ok."

"Announce what?" I asked.

"My favourite five," she revealed.

"Favourite five what?" I asked, still not catching on.

"The five celebrities she is allowed to fuck if she ever meets them and it doesn't count as cheating," Jenna explained.

"Oh," I replied, before adding, "wait, do I get a list?"

"Of course," Alexis smiled, "although they are the five celebrities you would like to see me sleep with."

A blonde I didn't know said, "Oh, Alexis you are soooo bad."

Alexis smiled, "I am not, I am just drawn that way," quoting my favourite 80s movie, Who Framed Roger Rabbit? Alexis pointed to a spot for me to sit at the round table and then slid beside me.

Jenna, already showing impatience, demanded, "Stop stalling, Alexis, your top five."

"Fine, fine, fine," Alexis responded, "Let's see, number five would still be Brad Pitt. I know he used to be my number one, but he gets older while my list stays the same age."

The girls laughed.

"Number four would be Hugh Jackman," my wife revealed, her hand landing on my leg.

"Why?" Jenna asked.

She shrugged, her hand under the table slithering up my leg slowly, "I love his British accent."

"Fair enough," Jenna agreed.

"Number three and two both played James Bond. Although tough to choose one over the other, I guess Pierce Bronson is number three and Daniel Craig is number two, but they could be interchangeable," she winked, her hand now firmly on my cock.

As she struggled with one hand to pull down my zipper and release my cock, she revealed her number one, "And without a doubt, and if there was it ended when I saw Crazy Stupid Love, the completely edible Ryan Gosling."

"Great choices," the unknown blonde concurred.

"Of course," Alexis smiled, pulling my cock out from its restrictive prison.

I let out a quiet moan, but no one seemed to notice. My wife began slowly giving me a hand job under the table as the conversation continued.

Jenna asked, "All right Jeremy, since you crashed this girl's night, you must play the game too."

"I didn't crash the party, Alexis told me to meet her here," I said, defensively.

Jenna, giving my wife a look, said, "She did, did she?"

Alexis, suddenly defensive and almost fearful of upsetting Jenna, stammered, "I-I-I am sorry, he is just going away next week and well...I miss him."

Jenna gave one last dagger's look and returned her gaze to me, her crystal blue eyes piercing into mine. "So your fav five. Or as Alexis already pointed out, the five you would like to see her dyke out with."

I countered, "I am not sure they would be the same."

"Reeeeally?" Jenna asked, clearly the leader of this group.

"I don't know, I would have to think about it," I responded.

Jenna played with her long blonde hair, the way she twirled with it and her tone implying a flirtation if it wasn't for the fact that my wife was right beside me, my cock gripped firmly in her hand. "So, either leave, or give us a famous five."

I looked at Alexis and she gave a subtle nod.

Jenna laughed, "Oh Jeremy are you ever whipped, asking permission to answer a question. Wow, Alexis I am impressed."

I spoke confidently, "I am not whipped, I just love to look at my lovely wife."

"You two make me sick," Jenna sighed.

"All right, my favourite five," I began getting back to the conversation.

Jenna interrupted, "That you want to see your beautiful wife play with."

"Sure," I agreed, "Ok, since my wife seems to like British men, I am assuming she would like British women too. So at number five is Kate Beckinsale, based on the fact that her favourite chick flick is Serendipity and she is damn hot."

My wife shrugged, "What can I say? I am a sucker for a romantic comedy."

Her hand began moving faster as I continued, "Sticking with the British theme, number four is Keira Knightley and number three, I am pretty sure she is legal now, would be Emma Watson. She is all grown up now."

"Oh, you nasty boy," Jenna teased, using a faux British accent that had my cock twitch. My wife gave a sudden squeeze, knowing exactly why I twitched.

Trying to distract her, I continued, "At number two is the quirky, the hot, the often pantyhose wearing Zooey Deschanel."

"Oh, is that your fetish?" Jenna flirted.

I stammered, realizing I revealed too much, "Um-I-well I suppose so."

Alexis added, trying to one-up the tipsy, flirting Jenna, "Yes, he loves fucking me in stockings."

The chubby girl gasped, "Alexis!"

Alexis smiled back, "What? I do what I need to do to please my man, don't I, baby?"

I purred back, "Indeed you do, my pet."

Jenna joked, "You two really do make me sick. Let's get back to our little game. So Jeremy, who would be number one on this list of your wife dyking out with celebrities?"

"Sticking with the Crazy Stupid Love theme, I will go with the beautiful redheaded Emma Stone."

"Hmmm," Alexis faked a moaned, "good choice baby, I would devour her whole."

Her hand was now moving at a steady rate on my cock and her naughty innuendo was getting me close. Jenna asked, "Would your fav five be any different?"

"I don't think so," I reflected, "all five are very fuckable."

"Indeed they are," Jenna laughed. "Well ladies next stop is Malibu's and," she added, looking at me, "no boys allowed."

Feeling my balls bubbling, I stiffened my legs and got ready to come from my wife's hand, while four of her friends sat around the same table, oblivious. I shrugged, "No biggie, I have things I need to do."

Jenna smiled, "Good, because we are getting your wife shitfaced tonight."

"Go ahead," I said, barely holding in a moan, as I began to shoot my cum underneath the table. Alexis kept pumping my cock until my public, yet secret, orgasm subsided. Once done, she let go off my cock and subtly, put her hand to her mouth and retrieved the cum that had landed on her hand. It was so fucking hot, I wanted to fuck her right here, right then. I also knew right then, right there that no matter how great my famous five were, my real number one was right beside me.

The conversation continued for a few minutes and after awkwardly getting my cock back in my pants, I texted a buddy and made plans to meet at the pub. Making sure to make it clear I was the man in our relationship, I pulled her in for a passionate kiss in front of her friends before saying, "Have fun tonight sexy, I am going to meet Pete and have a few drinks."

She leaned in and whispered, "Sorry about tonight, I had a naughty plan for you, but it will have to wait."

I gave her a wink that implied it was fine and said my goodbyes. I headed out and ended up not getting home until 2:30 and was shocked to see she still wasn't home. I crashed on the bed, still fully dressed, and instantly hit full slumber.

4. THE FOURTH DAY OF SEXMAS...Saturday December 17th, 2011

When I finally opened my eyes, a hangover clearly at work, I rolled over and saw my lovely bride still asleep. I quietly got out of bed and made her and me my hangover cure: a fruit smoothie and oatmeal...the real kind, none of that microwavable crap. I also made some coffee just in case. Once it was made, I put it on a tray and went upstairs.

Alexis was awake, but not moving. I said, "Good afternoon, sleepyhead."

She turned to the clock, "Is it really afternoon already?"

"Yep," I replied, reaching the bed. "Sit up! I got the cure for your hangover blues."

"I can't believe how late we went," she mumbled, still not fully awake.

I put the tray on her lap and asked, "What time did you get home?"

"It was after four," she answered through a yawn.

"Wow, that is like 5 hours past your bedtime," I joked, although it was the truth. Alexis is not a night owl, but more of a get up and go type of woman...the opposite of me.

"So true," she sighed, before taking a long sip of the shake. "Thank you, I so needed this."

"No problem, I can't even count the times you have helped me recover from my own self-inflicted death sentence."

"Seventy-three," she quipped.

"Hardy-har-har," I replied. "So I was thinking we could hit a movie this evening, what do you think?"

"No decisions until I eat and make sure I am not already dead and am just in some cruel limbo place between earth and heaven," she moaned.

We ate in silence and once done, slowly re-joined civilization. Showered up, Alexis was more herself. She said, "Well, I don't feel perfect, but I am good enough to continue with my plan."

"Plan?" I asked.

"Of course, today is day four of the 12 days of Sexmas," she winked.

"How could I forget," I mocked.

"Indeed, how could you," she retorted, her wit as quick as mine.

"So what is on the agenda today? An orgy with your teacher friends?"

"Hmm, you would like that, wouldn't you," she teased, grabbing her purse.

"Well, not with all of them, but a couple I could handle," I responded, acting like the stud I wasn't.

"Let me guess, Jenna would be one?" she hypothesized correctly.

"Well, if she begged, it would be hard to turn her down," I joked.

"That I agree with," she replied, throwing me for a loop with implied lesbian innuendo before instructing, "Let's go, stud boy."

"Where?" I asked, not really in the mood to be gallivanting.

"That is for me to know and you to find out," she answered, flicking me on the nose.

I reluctantly followed her, although I have to admit I was slightly curious. We drove, chatting about trivial work stuff and making plans for getting me to the airport Tuesday morning, before arriving at the worst place on earth for a man, especially a man with a hangover, the mall! I groaned, "Really, Alexis, you can't be serious."

"Of course, I am, but don't you worry your pretty little, head my dear, I guarantee you will enjoy it," she promised.

"Unless it includes a blowjob, I doubt you will be able to keep that promise," I quipped, the glass clearly half empty at the moment.

She ignored my negativity and hopped out of the car. I quickly followed her and we made our way through the throngs of people searching for Christmas presents. Being the good husband I was, I already had her presents and they were amazing. I assumed Alexis had mine already too, as she was known for her militant "Christmas shopping must be done by the end of Thanksgiving weekend" regimen.

We walked through the entire mall before finally reaching our apparent destination, a store called Satin & Sin.

My wife smiled mischievously, "Still hate me?"

"Well, that depends on why we are going into Satin & Sin."

"Follow me, babe," she said, reaching for my hand and pulling me inside.

I was like a fat kid in a candy store. This was wall to wall thin lingerie, naughty costumes and silk stockings. I couldn't even begin to know which way to turn. Alexis smiling said, "So tonight is role play fun."

"Excuse me?" I asked, unsure what she meant.

"You can choose any costume you want me to try on here and I will. Then you can pick three to buy, one that I will wear tonight when we role play."

"Role play? Anything?" I questioned.

"Anything your little heart and cock desires," she teased. She sauntered, wiggling her ass perfectly, and reaching for a nurse's outfit. "Want me to take your temperature?"

I countered, "I know my blood is a boiling."

She laughed and disappeared behind a curtain. As she changed, I perused the costumes, choosing a few for my beautiful wife to try on. She peeked from behind the curtain, "I need some white thigh highs, baby."

I went over to the stockings area and grabbed a pair of white thigh highs with seams down the back. I gave them to her, excited to see her in the whole nurse's ensemble. A minute later, she called, "You ready?"

"More than ready," I flirted.

She revealed herself and I gasped. She looked radiant, naughty and absolutely fuckable. "Cat got your tongue?"

"No, but you do," I replied. "You look so hot I want to do you here."

"So I will take that as I should get this one?" She smirked.

"1 million percent yes," I declared.

"I see you have a collection for me to try on," she noticed.

I shrugged, "Well, we are here already."

She reached for the cop's outfit. "Hmmm, we may need to get some handcuffs too." She winked and disappeared again.

I am sure it was less than three minutes for her to change outfits, but it was enough time for me to start creating nasty fantasies in my head of me being a patient and she a nurse helping me recover.

She popped out again and who knew a cop could be so hot. That said, if all cop outfits were this tight and short, I am sure the police would get a lot more positive attention. "Soooooooo," she asked.

"I would love to use my baton stick on you," I said, going for witty.

"Well, I have a couple dangerous weapons here myself," she replied, squeezing her breasts together.

I put my hands out and joked, "I surrender, although feel free to use force."

She chuckled and reached for the remaining outfits, "I may be here all day."

Next she came out in a school-girl's outfit, except instead of knee high socks, she still had on the white thigh highs. She sauntered over to me, "Teacher, is there any way I can improve my mark?"

Her finger slid slowly down my chest, as I responded, "I don't think you fully comprehended the rise and fall of the Roman Empire, but I think you may excel in a different type of rise and fall."

She smiled, "If we were at home right now, I would fall to my knees and wait for you to rise to attention."

"Too late," I replied, honestly.

As she walked back to change again, she added, "Of course, I would need beige thigh highs for this outfit to really work."

"Of course," I agreed, not caring what color the stockings were.

Next she came out in what was, I think, a fire fighter's outfit, although it was too skimpy for me to be sure. I only concluded this from what she said, although all dressed in red and contrasting white stockings she was ridiculously hot, "I hear there is a fire that needs to be put out."

Quick witted as usual, I replied with similar sexual innuendo, "Actually, I think you may need my hose. It is already fully loaded."

She laughed, "This one is maybe too hot?"

"Nice pun," I pointed out as she disappeared again.

She took longer this time and called out, "I need beige pantyhose, baby."

"Ok," I replied, just as a saleswoman, in her early twenties, finally came over.

She offered, "I will get some for you, sir."

"Thanks," I replied and she quickly left and just as quickly returned. She went to the change room area and handed them to my wife. They both were in there a couple of minutes, just enough time for my mind to play nasty tricks on me, before they both came out. If the other uniforms had me panting, this one had me literally drooling. She was Supergirl. She had the cape and everything. Her firm breasts were barely being held in by the super-tight t-shirt, just the same as my cock was barely held in check in my pants.

The cute saleswoman suggested, "I think this outfit would work even better with darker pantyhose, say maybe mocha?"

"I concur," my superhero wife agreed.

The saleswoman left and my wife said, "Does something here need saving?"

"Oh very much so," I replied, as my wife's hand reached my stiff cock.

"Hmmm," she purred, "this would need a lot of tender loving care. Maybe I need to be in the nurse outfit."

The saleswoman unfortunately returned with darker pantyhose and suggested, "You should try these on, and they come in the crotch-less variety."

The what?" I asked.

"Crotch-less, for easy access," the cute brunette suggested rather matter-of-factly.

"Oh, of course," I replied, attempting to make this odd conversation casual.

The brunette, thinking I hadn't caught on, explained, "That way, she can keep the uniform on while role playing as you penetrate her."

I gasped and my wife replied, "Well that is very convenient, thank you Mabel."

How did my wife know her name? My wife disappeared again as Mabel said, "I will pack up the other things we talked about."

From back, Alexis called back, "Sounds good."

"What other things?" I asked, curious.

"It is a surprise," she smiled, her smile so knowing that I could only conclude it was something sexual and awesome.

Mabel disappeared and my wife reappeared in the same outfit but with darker pantyhose. And I had to agree, the darker color made the amazing outfit out of this world. I desperately wanted to fuck her right then and there. She smiled, "Know all I have to do is unbutton this button that keeps my shirt tight against me," which she did and the shirt popped up a bit and I could clearly make out the hole that led to her precious hole, "and you have instant access to your kryptonite."

I smiled, reaching for her, my hand going to her pussy, "And I know exactly how to make you weak at the knees."

She let out a gasp as my finger slid inside her already damp pussy. She pushed me back after a couple of seconds, "Ohhh, I want to feel your kryptonite in my kryptonite, but...oh fuck it." She looked around and no one was watching so she pulled me into the change room and into a smaller stall. As soon as the door was closed she pulled out my cock, bent over and I slid into her standing up. I knew we had limited time so I didn't waste a second as I quickly pumped her cunt. She desperately tried to silence her moans as I drilled her hard and deep. The fucking gave new definition to the meaning of quickie as in less than two minutes I was releasing my cum into her. I wanted to keep fucking her and get her off, but she stood up and said, reading my mind, "Don't worry, baby, you can return the favour later."

"I love you," I replied, leaning in for a kiss.

Once the kiss ended, she replied, "I love you too, baby."

I quickly exited the stall just as another woman was entering the change room. She gave me an odd look, but I scurried out before any scene could be made.

A couple of minutes later, my wife returned back in her original outfit and said, "I'll just buy them all."

"A very good decision," I replied and we headed to the till. Already wrapped in a bag was the secret purchase, and two hundred and fifty-seven dollars later we were on our way back to the car. It was easily the best clothing purchase ever.

The next couple of hours included a variety of non-thrilling errands in the mall that were way less tedious after our quick fuck and the knowledge that tonight was going to be...wait for it...legendary. A couple of presents for nieces and nephews, a gift for her mother and mailing all our Christmas cards which would definitely not arrive in time.

Once back in the car and on the road, I asked, "So, which outfit do you plan to wear tonight?"

"Ohhhh, I have something very, very fun in mind for you tonight," she teased, her hand landing on my leg.

"You really are my kryptonite," I replied, swerving back into my lane after drifting a bit from her touch and words.

"And you are mine," she copied, her hand giving a gentle squeeze.

I drove wondering, which it would be. There were three more outfits she hadn't tried on yet, but we had purchased: a sweet Belle dress, her favourite Disney princess, a flapper dress and a naughty nun outfit. Each outfit had different fantasies spinning in my head at a high-speed pace. My cock stayed stiff the whole drive home.

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