Between the Bars Pt. 07

"We're so glad you're okay," Charlotte was saying over and over, almost in tears. "Kat told us everything. I can't decide if you're so brave I need to cry, or so goddamn stupid I need to kill you."

"What she means is, we're proud of you kiddo," Paul grinned.

"Kat and I went and bought you a few clothes," Charlotte rattled on while Kat drove us toward her apartment. "She told me you didn't have any, that you had to borrow some from someone. Now you'll have something to wear till you get home. What's going on with Daniel?"

I told them all about his shoulder and everything the doctor told us. "I'm taking him home with me to Atlanta for a couple of weeks, until he heals a little. He needs someone to take care of him right now and I'm the only one who works from home, plus I want to do it. I know you brought my car up, but we're going to have to fly to Atlanta. There's absolutely no way Daniel can sit in a car that long. I'm sorry. None of this was decided until today."

"It's okay," Paul shrugged. "Don't worry about it. I'll drive your car down to you when you get back home to Atlanta.

"You'd do that? I'll buy you a plane ticket back, Paul. That's just... you don't know what a weight that is off my mind." I'd been worrying over it since we got everything decided and I was so relieved that it was going to work out, I was practically giddy.

Back at Kat's apartment, Charlotte brought out a home-cooked meal she'd transported up here from home. It was delicious and even though I kept picturing Daniel struggling to eat hospital food, I ate as much as I could hold and then took a long, hot shower. While the hot water pounded down on me, I kept replaying what Michael said and a little voice of doubt in my head started to nag at me. Yeah, Daniel probably would be bored with my life. I'd known that from the beginning. Maybe he wouldn't stay. Maybe he would go back to being a cop. If he did, I couldn't stop him and I wouldn't try. I loved him and I wanted him safe, but I never wanted to be a burden or a weight on his shoulders that held him back. If that time came when he wanted to move on, I wouldn't hang on. I'd never planned on doing that. I only wanted to be part of his life if he wanted me.

Climbing out of the shower, I dried off and got dressed in the new clothes Charlotte had left on the bed. It was so nice to be clean. Michael's little talk had sent me crashing, but I enjoyed relaxing and talking with Kat and Paul and Charlotte for a while. However, it wasn't long before I was glancing at the clock every few minutes. Kat caught me and smiled. "You want to be back at the hospital with Daniel."

"Yeah, I do." Admitting it didn't embarrass me one bit. They might grin and shake their heads at my total devotion but I didn't care. "I know the nurses are taking care of him and his friends are there, but I still need to be there."

"Well I suppose that's natural considering you just watched him get shot," Kat said. "Can't blame you for not wanting to let him out of your sight."

"Yeah... I'm not supposed to be talking to you, by the way." As tired as I was, my mind was jumping around in random bursts, unable to stay on one track for long.

"Says who?" she frowned.

"Special Agent Asshole. Says I can't talk to you because you're a reporter. The case is too sensitive. Told him to fuck off, that I'd talk to whomever I wanted. I can't discuss the investigation with you, though."

"I know. I just figured I'd keep trying as long as I could. Come on, let's get you back before you have a stroke." She got up and grabbed her keys, since I was already pacing back and forth like a puppy wanting to go for a walk. Paul and Charlotte came along with us and hugged me with promises to see me tomorrow.

Heading to the fifth floor, I tipped my head back against the elevator wall and closed my eyes. The lobby and elevator were empty at this hour of night, past normal visiting hours. I was calmer now, but I still dreaded walking into that hospital room and facing Michael and his false niceness for Daniel's sake, or worse, that pitying smile like I was some sort of tragic heroine everyone knows will wither away in the end. Shit. Where did that guy get off?

I was in no mood for his crap. If not for Daniel, hurt and broken in the hospital bed, I would've turned around and kept walking so I didn't have to see Michael. So, when I stepped off the elevator and saw Gray wandering around in the waiting room, coming toward me the moment he saw me, I groaned out loud. Fuck, now what?

"What did he say to you?"

"Oh, you mean your boyfriend? He just followed me to the elevator to tell me that Daniel was only going with me out of gratitude and that as soon as he was in his right mind he'd fall over himself leaving me."

"Argh." Swiping his hand over his face, Gray shook his head. "I'm so sorry, Rylan. I can't believe he did that."

"Don't apologize for him. He might be right, who knows?"

"He's not, Rylan. Danny loves you. It's obvious."

"And it's obvious that Michael can't handle it." I stared Gray straight in the eyes. "So, how long has your boyfriend been in love with Daniel?"

That made him skip a beat and a flush rose in his cheeks. "Um. I don't know that he's in love with Daniel, but Michael was really close to Ray. You know about Ray, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, anyway, Ray was like an older brother figure to Michael, a mentor, and when Ray and Daniel got together I think Michael was very hurt even though Ray made it clear that it was never going to happen with him and Michael. So, Michael was drawn to Daniel and I've heard him say that he wished he'd met Daniel first. This all happened before Michael and I started seeing each other, we've been together for about four years now and Ray has been gone almost two. When Ray died, I almost thought Michael would... well. He says it's friendship and I believe him."

Gray shrugged. I stared at him in disbelief. These two were something else. I know I couldn't deal with my lover being hung up on someone else. Fucking someone, getting a blowjob in a club, yeah, but not being in love with another man for the entire relationship. But if Gray could accept it, then who was I to say anything? It was none of my business anyway so I just kept my mouth shut.

"So Daniel is ready to let go of Ray and move on, but Michael isn't."

"Maybe," Gray answered after he blinked for a few seconds. "You might be right about that. But he's going to have to eventually, and please Rylan, just don't let him try to chase you away from Danny. I think his intentions are good but it's not his decision to make."

I had my doubts about Michael's good intentions, frankly, but I didn't share that thought. "Well, I have no illusions that he might not be right, but I'm going to stay around as long as Daniel wants me. Excuse me. I need to see him."

Stepping around Gray, I headed down the hall to the room, where Daniel was propped up and smiling, although still a little pale, at something Michael said. He lit up when I walked into the room and went over to kiss him.

"The doctor said I could go home tomorrow, Ry, that my urine is clear and I can get off the IV in the morning. Isn't that great?"

I smiled, forgetting all about Michael and Gray and all their crap and their drama. Everything else was just an annoyance. To me all that mattered was that Daniel was here, and getting better, and it was all over.

****

Chapter 34

"Rylan. You busy?"

I sighed patiently and hit Control-S to save my work on the dimly glowing computer screen.

"Ready to get out now?" I called back. He was just past the doorway in the master bath, soaking in the tub. I was about to change all his bandages anyway, so as long as he didn't get the wounds in his shoulder wet he could bathe; showers were still out though. He still got tired too easily to stand up that long even with me to support him.

"Not yet... Can you help me a minute? But if you're writing..."

"S'okay, just editing."

I got up and headed through the door. The whirlpool tub in my master bath, connected to my office, had never been used until the past two weeks while Daniel was staying here. He lay back in water up to his waist with his arm strapped in the black sling that kept it tight against his chest. His eyes were shocking blue, contrasting with the white tiles. The rest of him, unfurled in the tub, was lean and naked and beautiful but when I caught a glimpse of the bruised, damaged skin around his bandages, it still made my stomach lurch.

"I wish I could get all the way in the water... sink down up to my neck and turn the jets on. My muscles are so fucking sore."

I sank down to my knees on a towel and grabbed the shower gel off the side of the tub, squeezing a big blob into my hands. It smelled sweet and fruity, like mangoes. Daniel leaned forward slightly, his tanned skin wet and shiny. His hair had grown back enough to look like a standard buzz-cut. He didn't care if he was scruffy but since I liked him clean-shaven, I carefully shaved his face every morning; he could eat with his left hand now but he wasn't coordinated enough to shave himself. About the only thing he couldn't wash on his own was his left arm and his back. I knew he was tired when his head dropped forward and he let out a little groan as I slid my soapy hands over the smooth, silky expanse of his back, his muscles so hard and rippling under the softness of his skin.

"Then you'd miss my great massage."

"Mmmhmm." He melted under my hands, his stiff muscles undulating, stretching. Touching him like this sent a warm ripple over me that filled my cock. Every time we did this, I ended up hard and aching, and so did he. I wasn't in a hurry though. He couldn't do too much, we had to take things very slowly, and also, he was leaving in the morning and I wanted to enjoy every inch of him.

"Who's going to do this after tonight?" I whispered. Watching a drop of water trail down his spine to the crack of his ass, my tongue longed to follow it.

"Michael?" he suggested, grinning wickedly over his shoulder at me.

"I was thinking Liz." I splashed him with water and we both laughed, shuddering over the image of his chunky lesbian friend in my place. She'd driven up from Tallahassee the day after Christmas to see Daniel. She stayed in the guest room and she was very nice, if not someone you would want to wash your back. Gray and Michael would be here in the morning to take Daniel back home for a couple of weeks. It was time for him to start physical therapy and the police department was beginning to grumble at his absence in their internal hearings.

"Here, put your head back."

Daniel closed his eyes and tilted his head back, letting out a long sigh as I massaged his neck with my soapy hands, taking long strokes up over his head and circling his sensitive scalp, and stroking away the lines of pain etched on his forehead and temples. Goosebumps broke out over his body when I slowly moved my palm over his short, soft hair and under the water, his dick was hard and flushed.

"That feels so good..."

I smiled. I couldn't keep from tasting him anymore. I leaned across the edge of the tub and licked a drop of water from his left shoulder, the uninjured one. His arms were so sexy, even the bandages gave him sort of a war-hero appeal. Hard muscles defined under the satin skin I could lose myself in forever.

"So do you," I whispered into his ear. I slid my tongue down his neck and he rolled his eyes back, reaching up to put his left hand behind my head. I caught him as he started to slip down into the water. "Whoa. Here, let me rinse you."

I grabbed the plastic pitcher off the side of the tub and turned the faucet on, letting the water run over my hand until it was hot but not too hot. I watched the look of pure pleasure on his face as I poured the water down the back of his neck, rinsing the soap away in a river of suds.

He turned his head and kissed me, pulling me closer. I watched his eyes close as our lips teased and nibbled, but I kept mine open in case he slipped again. It was actually pretty awkward, leaning over the edge of the tub on my knees, supporting his weight and kissing him at the same time, with my hard-on trapped against the edge of the tiles, but I didn't complain because he felt so good, wet and naked, and his tongue was so sweet in my mouth. Finally, though, my knees hurt and I pulled back gently.

"Let's get you out of there." I hit the drain and Daniel wrapped his arm around my neck, soaking me with the water clinging to his skin. I supported him carefully as he got to his feet and stepped out of the tub, dripping and shaky from the effort. He was exhausted, but still stubborn.

"I can do it," he said when I grabbed a towel and started to dry him. I hid a sigh. Even after two weeks, he still tried to fight me.

"I want to do it," I said softly against his ear. My tongue flicked out and grazed his earlobe and I felt him shudder and give in. With that settled I gently patted his face and hair dry with the towel.

"You've got to be tired of babying me by now."

He meant it to be joking but it sounded rather pathetic. I smiled and brushed a kiss over his lips as I carefully dried his chest around the bandages. Still sore, still bruised and broken, and he was leaving tomorrow. I made myself not think of him trying to do all this alone. He said he could, that he would be okay, he'd let his friends help him and not try to push himself too hard and make himself hurt more, and I trusted him. I did. I had to trust him but I still wished I could be there for him.

"I don't mind taking care of you, Daniel. You know that."

"I know. I just don't know why."

"Um, maybe because I love you? Duh." I rolled my eyes a little before I ducked away. Grabbing a towel, I folded it in half and put it on the edge of the tub. My heart was thumping in my throat and sweat prickled in my hair that had nothing to do with the steamy heat in the bathroom. I'd never said the words "I love you" before, I didn't think I needed to. I showed it in every way I could and that was what mattered. He knew, and I was sure he felt the same way, but some little-boy part of me was still afraid he'd laugh at me, or worse, give me that pitying look Michael gave me next to the elevator in the hospital.

"Here, sit on this." I eased him back and supported his weight as he sat down on the towel. He hated admitting how much simple things exhausted him, but I knew just by looking at him. He was tired but my words had lit a fire in his eyes and he stared at me intently, making me squirm, making me blush. I couldn't meet his eyes. I knelt between his legs and slowly dried his feet, nuzzling along the line of his calf, the light hair tickling my cheek. He relaxed then and grinned at me, spreading his knees to show me his dick was hard. Yeah, it was probably wrong to use sex to get my way, but it was the only time he gave in and let me fully take care of him.

As I slowly worked my way over his body with the towel, he fumbled with my soaked t-shirt, trying to pull it over my head with one hand. I stopped and peeled it off and he wrapped his fingers in my hair as I licked my way up his inner thigh, hands on his knees, pressing them open. The sweet scent of the mango soap made me drunk, his hot, damp skin under my tongue and his hand gently tugging at my hair and his cock inches from my face. I looked up into his eyes as I licked the tip of his dick, circling the head with my tongue. Tastes so good.

It was different with him hurt. I had to be so careful, so gentle and that was different from the rough play and aggressive fucks we indulged in before he was shot. It forced us to be more tender; instead of fucking all night, we kissed and talked and cuddled until his nightly pain pill dragged him into sleep. It was different, but nice. Didn't mean I didn't want sex, but we both knew we couldn't do much. Daniel was too weak and I was afraid of reopening his gunshot wounds if his blood pressure got too high, so it was a lot of leisurely blowjobs for him and a lot of masturbation for me, with an occasional hand job as he felt better.

Emotionally, we were closer than ever but I was missing the sex more and more every day. It was getting harder to wait until he felt better. I missed the warmth of him inside me, I missed being filled by him so much more than I ever imagined I could. Yeah, I loved fucking him and I could probably have done that if we were very careful, but right now I wanted him deep inside me until we forgot we were two separate people. I wanted his hands on my ass, making it burn and then taking the pain away along with all my doubt and fear. I wanted the release only he could give me.

Just thinking about it made the heat wash over me until I felt like I would implode and I moaned around his cock as I sucked it long and slow. He caught his breath and grabbed hard at my hair. I slid back from his cock and slowly swirled my tongue over his balls and down to the sweet little spot under them. He bucked and I pulled away. I didn't want him to hurt himself. Besides, I had an idea.

"Come on." I sounded harsh even to myself. Taking his hand, I led him down the hall to the bedroom and flipped on the lamp next to the bed. He lay back in the soft tangle of sheets, blankets and pillows watching me strip in the golden lamplight.

"I love your freckles, did you know that?"

I couldn't stop the blush that rose up. "The pain pills are starting to erode your gray matter."

Daniel chuckled and then raised his eyebrow as I opened the drawer and pulled out the lube and a condom. "What're you doing? I'm so not cleared for this kind of strenuous activity," he said, amused. And not protesting.

"It won't be strenuous for you. You're just going to lie still on your back with your dick up my ass."

He grinned, eyes lighting up like he'd gotten a new bike for Christmas. "I won't tell if you won't."

"Not a word."

Daniel's fingers lazily stroked my chest and tugged at my nipples as I straddled him on my knees. His sheathed cock slid through my lubed hand, making it slick and wet. My knees were shaking and he watched my eyes as I stroked myself until I shivered. Then he lifted his hand and I squirted some lube onto his fingers. Even left-handed, his fingers were nimble and wicked, teasing my hole, slipping in and then darting away and leaving me empty and aching. I fell forward onto my hands and knees over him, carefully supporting my own weight so I wouldn't hurt him even as I groaned and panted into his mouth at the feeling of his fingers filling me and opening me.

"Oh, god, Daniel... fuck me." I hardly even knew what I was saying.

"It's going to hurt if you rush this."

"Don't care."

I pushed back to my knees and leaned back. The tip of his cock brushed my ass and I wrapped my hand around the base, steadying it. It did burn when I sank down, a sharp pinch and a deep, dull burn. I stopped, suspended with my eyes closed, just waiting, waiting desperately for that split-apart feeling to pass and the pleasure to start. I felt his hand wrap around my shaft, thumb spreading the sticky wetness around and around the tip, swirling, and the deep burning tingle radiated into my balls and gathered into a knot of ecstasy and I moaned with relief when the pain went. Such a relief to have him in me.

"Yeah, fuck, more."

I moved slowly and opened my eyes. Daniel's lip was caught between his teeth and his head tipped back as I started to gently rock back and forth on his cock . The pleasure overtook him, but I felt his hips jerk and thrust upward and even amidst the waves of sex, I felt a stab of guilt. Maybe this was too soon, maybe I should've waited and not pushed him into this before his doctor okayed it...

"Daniel, are you hurting?"