Beyond Limits Ch. 03

"Russell, Russell!"

My hand was under her sweater. I knew where she liked to be touched. I knew how. Under the bra, my thumbs caressing her nipples, sliding around them, kissing her with my mouth locked against hers, her breath hot through her nostrils on my cheek. Give it to me, Lexi, give it to me. Whatever it is you have, give it to me! The sweetness of your body, your pleasure, the chance to make you weak, make you moan, your soul, the very spit in your mouth. I've had all of you before. There's nothing I haven't tasted of you, no shame I don't know. I'll do anything for your pleasure. You know that. I'll be anything for you.

We stagger into the bedroom, two drunks. In the light of the bedside lamp we undress each other, our hands trembling, caressing each other like clumsy children. She licks her hand and pumps my cock, her eyes burning with sadistic pleasure. I reach between her legs and stroke her sopping cunt, find her clit and torture it and she leans forward and bites my chest with a hiss, hypnotized by her own ecstasy. I can see his passion bites on her shoulders now and I know what's happened, but I've already known, I've already known. My love for her, where I am now, is beyond jealousy, beyond what anyone else can feel for her, beyond what she can feel for anyone else. Whatever he did to her was just holding hands to where I have her now, to what I feel.

"Baby! Take it! Take it!"

I push her down, naked in the lamplight, and she gets to her knees. She's breathing fast and hard, her lips swollen and parted, her eyes lidded. She takes my cock and passes the head over her lips, over her face, washing herself with it like it's something precious, leaving trails of precum over her Mediterranean skin. The friction of her beauty against the glans of my prick is excruciating and I groan, reaching out to grab her hair to steady myself.

"In your mouth, damn it! I'll shoot all over your fucking face!"

She opens her mouth, blind, sightless, shoves the tip in, pulls it out. Shoves it in again and I feel the scalding heat of the mouth I've just kissed, that holy mouth, beautiful, angelic, now filled with the filthy obscenity of my brutal dick. I snarl and pump, thrusting my hips forward, muscling my cock past her grip and into the cavern of her mouth, the private and intimate heat and wetness, the floor of her tongue rasping against me.

"Suck it! Suck that motherfucker!"

She gets up, her tits against my knees and she sucks me. Her nails dig into my ass as she sucks and sways her head like a cobra, gagging as the head batters the back of her throat. She coughs, chokes but won't relent. She sucks me as if I'm life itself, worships me, slithers her lizard tongue around the head as she holds the shaft and masturbates me and makes me cry out in alarm and pull her off me lest I spend it right into her mouth like that. She knows my sensitivities. Knows what to do to make me blurt my cream out into her greedy little mouth. She'd had me enough times like that to know. She's the mistress of my cock. She knows. She owns me. Her name is written all over my body.

I push her onto the bed. Grab her ankles and push her legs up rudely like she's nothing but a piece of meat, splitting her pussy and opening it for me. She's shaved and naked and she has no secrets from me either. Her face is serious, concerned.

"Now, baby! Now! Do it to me! Fuck me, baby! Do it!"

I lower my face to her slit and she groans and tries to close her legs. She's sensitive and still remembers how men have hurt her, not knowing this, but I know, and pressed my cheek against her inner thigh, then kiss her there, lick her, lick her down to her pussy and blow on it, making her tremble nervously. My tongue comes out and hovers like a butterfly over her slit, her engorged labia, barely touching her, not touching her. Just the heat from my tongue, the feeling of moisture, of closeness, immanence, the presence of flesh next to flesh. She groans, drops her head to the pillow as I kiss her clit with a lover's tender kiss, lick her trench, open her sticky lips, part them. Heaven. Mystery. Hell.

My tongue slides into her and her hips lift to me. Her thighs close on my ears and I hear nothing, like I'm drowning. I hear the blood in my own ears, like being underwater. I hear my own moans of pleasure as I taste her salacious juices and feel her soft flesh trembling beneath me. She's quaking, shuddering, and her hands are in my hair, both pulling and pushing. Go ahead darling: suffocate me here. I'll gladly die. Her hips are moving, fucking my face. God, what pleasure! Her legs fall open and I can hear.

"Fuck me! Oh God, fuck me!"

My face smeared with juice, I crawl up on top of her. She finds me and kisses me as I lift her knees and put them over my shoulders, folding her in half. The aching spear of my cock touched her hole and that's all—that's all I need. I push inside, push, push... Lexi, I'm in you, darling! In you! Opening you up, filling you.

God, how we fit! So perfect! Incredible. I never want to move yet can't hold still. I shove deep, deep into the live squish of her and feel her juice spill out. She pushes up against me somehow, taking me deeper, smashing her labia flat against the cruel hardness of my pubic bone just to feel my cock head slither another millimeter farther up inside her. She wants me close, bone close and marrow deep, breathing inside of her, and I'm starting to pump, sliding the length of him in and out of her quivering, clutching sheath as she locks her hands behind my neck and begins to whine, begins to chant: "Fuck me! God! Fuck me! Russell! Hard, baby! Hard! Hurt me with it! Make me feel it! Ungh! Give it to me! Make me take it!"

And I'm fucking her, fucking her, this beautiful woman I love, the one I've betrayed and who's betrayed me, whom I'll never fuck again though my love for her will never stop, though my love for her will lead me through the perverse and recondite tunnels and loops of my own heart and hers, through darkness beyond imagining and through death, shame, disgust and murder, through the things of which hell is made and heaven too, I fuck her, I fuck her, shove it into her, shove myself into her, into her cunt, into her body, crying, "Take it! Take me, Lexi! Take me! All of me! Every fucking inch! Oh God you're going to make me come!"

She got one leg loose and wrapped it around me and she's grabbed her foot with her opposite hand and holds me like that, locks her open mouth to mine so we're fixed like some surreal hollow human tube—don't ask me, I don't know how it works. I only know we're open to each other on some spiritual dimension through which our life's plasm freely streams from one to the other till there's no difference between us, just our physical body shells and the commingled fluid that's Russell and Lexi—locks her open mouth to mine and pulls me into her with the heel of her foot and I start coming, not with a huge, blinding explosion but with a kind of inevitable gush, a vast sending forth, a farewell or launching of soul from me to her—away the life boats, gone, goodbye, adieu.

I cling to her and hold on as my hips drill her, nail her, send her my final message, but there's no doubt what they're saying. I don't know if she notices. I don't know if I did either at the time. Maybe I'm crazy now, looking back on it, and maybe it didn't feel like this at all to me as I came in her, but it seems to me that I did, that this was our last time and our bodies knew it and they indulged with solipsistic glee in this selfish and insidious sensuality, fucking with every fiber of our beings, wetting us to the bone with each other.

"Fuck! God! Fuck!!" I thrust as I come, recoiling like a rifle, laying a carpet of come inside her, and Lexi rose to accept it, opened to take it in, a great swallowing maw, drank me down with some sort of subterranean finality and closed over me with the silence of the ocean

I stayed above her, resting on my arms and panting for breath, the sweat dripping off me. She was radiating heat like a coal stove and I was hot in front. My ass and back were cool from the air in the apartment. At first I thought she was laughing. It was too dark to see her face at all. I felt her body shaking and I thought it was laughter, and I was stunned, not believing she could laugh after that, but thank God I didn't say anything. She gave only one sob and held the rest in, then used the sheet to wipe her eyes.

She wasn't laughing, wasn't laughing, and I felt her pussy contracting around me as she wept and wept as I hung above her. I didn't have to ask her anything.

"Oh Russell, Russell," she sobbed. "I have the worst thing in the world to tell you..."