Blake Ch. 06

Author's Note: To my readers,

I apologize for the delay in this submission. I originally intended to release this chapter with chapter five, but was not satisfied and scraped the whole thing. Other projects have also delayed my progress, but I assure you, I intend to keep writing and finish this series (in due time). I hope to have Chapter 7 done within the next week or too. Thanks for your dedication!

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When I walked into my apartment a little after two in the morning, I had expected Desiree and Blake to be asleep. If they were awake, they would most likely be occupied so I could slip by unnoticed. I could not be more wrong.

The living room lamp was on. Blake was sitting on the couch, elbows resting on his knees, with a drink in his hand. He was still dressed for the party. He looked devastated. When I walked in, he didn't acknowledge my presence. He just sat and continued to sip from his drink.

I moved in slowly, not because I was trying to be quite. I ached all over from sex with Vance and every movement was painful. I winced in pain at one moment. The sound of my gasp drew Blake's attention.

"So you went through with it?" he asked.

"Why does it matter to you?" I was ready to go on the offensive against Blake. I was prepared to defend my actions. I was prepared to stand against Blake's verbal assault and ready to dish it back out to him. However, I wasn't prepared for his actual reaction.

Blake said nothing. He placed his drink on the table and put his face in his hands. He stayed there for a minute in silence. He finally pulled his hands away and stood up. He walked towards me and stopped inches from my face.

When I looked at him, I didn't see anger. His eyes were absent of rage and disgust. All I saw was pain. I was confused. I waited for it all the change, for him to yell at me. I waited for him to chastise me, call me a common office whore. But the vile never came. He just placed his forehead to mine, closed his eyes, and muttered a simple phrase.

"I'm sorry."

I was taken aback. He was actually apologizing to me for something that I had done. I was more confused than before.

"What?"

"I'm sorry. I pushed you to Vance. When you ended things so abruptly, I couldn't understand. Throughout the week, I saw you and Vance getting closer and I was jealous. I wanted you back so badly. I worked hard tonight to make you jealous of Desiree and me. I made you jealous of a lie. I was hoping you would come back to me. Instead, my greatest fear was realized when you left with Vance. Now, you're paying the price for my stupidity and immaturity. I'm so sorry, Kaitlin. I'm so sorry!"

I had never seen Blake so raw. He was in pain. Deep emotional pain. And as much blame as he had put on himself, I realized that this was my doing. I should've been the bigger person and not fueled the fire. But by sleeping with Vance, I had burned down the whole damn forest. The strong, confident, and sexy man was gone. Blake was broken.

In an instant, my moment of triumph was gone. Instead, I was the girl sitting on the counter one week ago. All I wanted to do was comfort him, tell him that everything was going to be all right. I didn't know if it was, but I had to do something to repair the damage I had caused.

"Blake, it-" he placed his finger over my lips, shaking his head.

"Don't try to take any blame. I won't let you." He pulled away from me. I wanted so desperately to pull him back, to hang on to him. He moved back to the couch and sat down, staring at the empty glass on the table.

"You've had a trying night, Kaitlin. I'll see you in the morning," he said, never taking his gaze from the glass.

I stood in shock at what I had done. Tears began to well up in my eyes. I ran to the bathroom and shut the door. I didn't want Blake to see me cry. I couldn't face myself in the mirror. All the pride I had felt when I walked in was gone. I was disgusted with myself and what I had done. I wished it was all a bad dream. I wished I hadn't slept with Vance. I wished I talked things out with Blake. I wished I could rewrite history and make everything perfect.

I couldn't erase the past and I couldn't scrub my memory, but I was going to get rid of every bit of physical evidence of my misadventure. I grabbed my toothbrush and scrubbed inside my mouth as hard as I could. I didn't want to taste Vance. When I was finished, I threw it in the trash. I turned the water in the shower on as hot as possible. I tried to unzip my dress, but was met with excruciating pain. I looked down at my wrist, which was already starting to bruise. The tears that had been lurking in my eyes had spilled over and I collapsed onto the counter.

The fallout had been much worse than I anticipated. I knew I was in physical pain from my violent sex with Vance, however I hadn't realized the extent of the damage until now. Forgetting this night anytime soon would not be possible, at least not until the bruises healed. Hiding them would be incredibly difficult and it would only be a matter of time until Blake saw them. His own healing would be prolonged and there was no one to blame but me.

I laid on the counter, sobbing. How could I have let myself get so out of control? I used to be in command of everything, but now, my life was spinning wildly. I didn't know what to do. I just stayed there crying.

I was so engulfed by my misery, I hadn't noticed the hand resting on my shoulder. I spun around and jumped into Blake's arms, tears still streaming down my face.

"I'm so sorry, Blake," I said, sobbing into his shoulder. "I shouldn't have done it. I saw you and Desiree having sex. I was so upset, so jealous that I was willing to hurt you to make myself feel better, but it only made everything worse."

I looked into his eyes.

"I'm sorry I hurt you. I was stupid and selfish. I know you said not to blame myself, but I did this to you. It kills me to see you like this and know that I did it. I'll do anything to make this right, Blake. I just want to see you happy again."

I buried my face into his strong chest as the tears continued to stream down. I stayed there weeping, waiting for a response. I was hoping he would take my apology. I didn't want him to continue to blame himself.

Blake brought his hand to the back of my head and gently stroked my hair. I looked up at him. The pain in his eyes was starting to ebb.

"Kaitlin, there's no need for tears," he said, wiping my cheek. "I'll be fine. Let's not worry about tonight any longer."

His words didn't help put me at ease. He kissed my forehead and began to leave.

"Stay," I said meekly. He stopped and looked back at me. He seemed hesitant to say yes. "I just want some company. You don't have to come in the shower with me. Just stay in here and chat. Please?" I was desperate to keep him close. I didn't care if it lead to anything sexual. I just needed him with me.

He paused and thought about my offer. He gave me a weak smile.

"Okay. I'll be right back," and he departed.

I fought the pain in my wrist as I unzipped my dress. I quickly moved into the shower, as I didn't want Blake to see the darkened flesh on my wrists. Steam had already filled the room, as the water was incredibly hot. I burned my skin trying to adjust it to a comfortable temperature. I began to submerse my body in the cascading fall of warm water. Instead of being whisked into a state of relaxation, I was greeted with more pain.

I opened my eyes and fully examined the extent of the damage caused by Vance. It had been much worse than I had expected. My left breast was adorned with bite marks and slight bruising. My ass was bruised also from his vicious spanking and my pussy ached from his vigorous and violent assault. The crest of my hips were bruised as well from Vance's tight grip. I winced in pain when the water directly contacted any of these points. I was really paying for my mistake.

Blake soon returned to the bathroom. I was lucky that the glass was textured, obscuring his vision of me. I wasn't going to let him see the bruising. I knew it would do nothing to make him feel better. However, it wasn't the visual that was going to give me away. The smallest movements created significant pain that I was finding hard to stifle. It was going to take everything I had not to give it away.

The silence was no help at all. I wanted some noise to drown out any slip ups I had, but I didn't know how to start the conversation. I didn't want to say something that was going to make either of us upset again and the last thing I wanted to talk about was Vance. After several eerily quiet minutes, Blake broke the ice.

"You looked beautiful tonight."

"Thank you," I replied quietly.

"You made it incredibly difficult to keep face, Kaitlin. It was hard to keep from staring at you." I could hear a smile in his voice. I was glad there was something from this night that he could look back on happily. It was a little bit of an ego boost that I was the subject of his enjoyment.

"I wish it was you on my arm tonight and not that bimbo," he said. I could hear him sipping from his glass. His demeanor was changing as he spoke of her.

"Did something happen tonight?" I asked, suppressing the twinge of pain.

"You saw how she was dressed tonight. It was inappropriate. Not to mention that there will be pictures of us all over the business page with stories questioning my ability to make decisions for the company. Questions that didn't exist this morning and are only being asked by my choice to date her. It won't surprise me if there is a dip in the stock price too."

He was getting angry the more he spoke about the evening. I wanted to go out and calm him down, but I knew if he saw the bruises, it would make matters worse. I had to let him vent.

"When you left, I went to the bar to get a drink to calm my nerves. She used it as an opportunity to get plastered. By the end of the night, she was grinding on four managers and two board members. On three different occasions, I had to urge her to keep her clothes on. I finally had to drag her out literally kicking and screaming while her father laughed nearby."

I had known Desiree to be an excessive drinker, but never to go that far in public. I wondered what had set her off, but I had very little time to dwell on that, as Blake wasn't finished his tirade.

"When we got back, she tried to throw herself at me, then proceeded to get sick in the sink twice. I was able to get her into her bed as she tried undressing me. When I refused her, she started crying hysterically, before finally passing out with half her dress off. If I had just taken you..." he became inaudible as he mumbled into the glass.

His night had been worse than mine had. I felt for him, but at the same time, was confused. He knew Desiree was a classless, spoiled brat. Did he really believe that she was going to behave like a lady tonight? I was hesitant to ask as I didn't want to set him off again, but I couldn't help myself.

"Why do you date Desiree? You guys have different personalities. It just doesn't make sense to-OW!" I had pushed myself too far in my bathing and hurt my wrist. My cover was blown.

"Are you alright?" Blake asked, jumping to his feet. I didn't have time to reassure him I was okay before he had opened the sliding glass door. I was exposed, in more ways than one.

"God, Kaitlin. Are you okay?" he said, stepping into the shower. He didn't bother removing the tight gray t-shirt and red gym shorts he was wearing. I moved closer to him and out of the water.

"I'm fine," I lied. "Just a little sore."

"A little sore? Sweetie, you covered in bruises. What did Vance do to you?"

"He likes really rough sex. I didn't think he would leave marks. Or that it would hurt so much to move."

"I knew Vance was an asshole, but I didn't know this was what he did. Otherwise I would have made sure you never left with him tonight."

His fingers were tracing the bruises on my body gently. I was savoring his touch. I bit my lip and closed my eyes as I tried to keep my breathing under control; however, I found the task difficult. Even in my physical condition, I still craved Blake. I wanted him to take me in his arms and kiss me passionately. I wanted him to take my breast into his mouth and play with my erect nipples. I wanted him to bury his cock deep inside my moistening pussy and reclaim me as his own. The simple thought of him doing any of it was making me wet. I wanted to touch myself so badly.

I opened my eyes to see Blake gazing at me. His eyes were full of concern.

"Are you finished showering, Kaitlin? You need your rest."

I nodded. Blake reached behind me and turned off the water. He grabbed my oversized towel and wrapped me in its warmth. He scooped me into his arms and carried me back to my room. Once there, he helped me dry off.

"I can do it," I protested.

"No, you'll hurt yourself again. Just stay still." His hands were gentle under the towel. He moved slowly over me, as if he was trying to memorize my body with his touch. As he traveled, my breath was growing quicker and it was hard to control myself. I needed him so badly.

When I was finally dry, he gazed into my eyes. I was lost. I was captivated. I wanted his soft lips pressed against mine. I brought my hand up to his face and stroked down his cheek to his lips, then traced his lower lip with my thumb. He took a quick breath in and I stopped. His eyes were closed as he was focused on steadying his breathing. I took my hand away and moved in for a kiss, but was met with open space as he moved away from me.

"Do you have something to wear to bed?" he asked, heading towards my dresser.

"Yea," I replied, disheartened. I moved across the room and grabbed an oversized t-shirt out of the top drawer. I hastily put it on without looking at Blake. What did I expect? I wasn't going to get away with my transgressions without punishment.

"Thanks for your help," I said, moving towards my bed. I pulled back the covers and looked up to see that Blake had left. I climbed into bed and turned off my lamp.

Once in the seclusion of darkness, I let the tears fall again. Why did I care so much? Blake had no romantic link to me. It was just sex. Nothing more, right? No. Both of us had been profoundly impacted by my latest sexual misadventure. Could there be more?

The prospect of more had always excited me. Now that future seemed impossible. This thought only made the tears come harder. I stifled my cries and let the soundless tears flow as I tried to drift into a lonely, dark sleep.

"Kaitlin?" his voice sounded from the door softly.

"Yea?" I replied, quickly wiping away the tears. He moved around my bed and turned the lamp on, before crouching down to my level.

"I brought you some medicine to help with the pain." He handed me the pills and a glass of water.

"Are you okay?" he asked, wiping away a stray tear.

"I'm angry with myself. I should never have done what I did tonight. Seeing how much it hurt you, it killed me Blake."

"Don't worry about me," he chuckled softly. "I think you are the one who was more hurt by tonight." He took my wrist in his palm as gently as possible. It was as if he was handling a delicate piece of china. He ran his fingers over the tender flesh. I held my breath.

"Besides, I'm the one to blame." He sat down on the edge on the bed, still holding my wrist, his gaze focused on it, as he continued. "Kaitlin, you started to ask me why I date Desiree. I wish I could tell you, but I can't right now."

"Why not?" None of this was making sense to me.

"It's complicated. Since I met you, I've been working so hard to get out of this thing with Desiree. I don't want her. Not when there is a far better woman sitting right in front of me." He looked up into my eyes. "I need you to trust me. I will do everything in my power to protect you from this, but at the end of the day, I have to play the part of her boyfriend. Know that I wouldn't do it unless I had to. If I complete control of the situation, we would both be sleeping comfortably in my bed tonight. I would be holding you tightly in my arms and never let go."

I was completely confused by it all. Why couldn't he tell me? What secret was he hiding? How could he expect me to trust him when I have been through so much emotional turmoil in the last two weeks, all of which has been caused by our unusual relationship?

Say no, I told myself. This cannot end well.

But I didn't listen.

"What's stopping you from holding me right now and falling asleep in my bed?"

He smirked his signature, sexy smirk.

"Well, I'm afraid of hurting you, Kaitlin. Clearly, you are very fragile and the last thing you need is your sleep disrupted by me accidentally touching one of your many bruises."

"Maybe your kisses will make them feel better."

He took my challenge. Blake brought his wrist up to his lips and gently kissed my skin. His eyes never left mine. I bit my lip in excitement. He repeated the same process with the other wrist. My heart was racing, as I reveled in the moment.

"Like that?" he asked, smiling up at me.

I shook my head. His touch was heavenly. I didn't want him to stop.

Blake maneuvered over me and laid down on the bed, propping his upper body up on his elbow. He lowered the bed sheet enough to get at the hem of my shirt and lifted up, revealing my breast, which was adorn with two bruises. He softly kissed the bruise above my left nipple, and then slowly dragged his lips down, lightly flicking my nipple with his tongue as he passed over it, before reaching the bruise at the bottom of my breast and gently kissing it. I moaned as he continued down my body, removing the covers of the sheet. His lips never left my flesh.

When he reached my waist, he turned his head and traveled down my backside to the bruise on my ass. He planted another gentle kiss, before gliding up to my hips and planting a kiss on each hipbone bruise.

My blood was on fire. I was biting into my lip hard to stifle the moans. My body was eager and I wanted him. Yet, I couldn't make the next move. I didn't know where his mind was given the evenings events. The cracks had been mended, but I knew if I moved to soon, I'd risk bursting the dam. I had to wait for his lead.

Blake continued his descent, his lips barely grazing my skin. His lips trailed down my pelvis and over my pubic bone, before coming to rest just above my clit. My body shuddered in anticipation. I waited for him to bury his face into me; give me the release I needed. Instead, he planted a soft kiss on my clit. Although it was not what I wanted, the sensation caused me to moan and my breath to quicken.

Blake gazed into my eyes, gauging my reaction, before kissing the same place again. I moaned louder this time. My pulse was quickening and my body temperature was rising. It was becoming apparent that the slightest touch from Blake was driving my body wild.

I waited in anticipation for Blake's next kiss, but was stunned when I felt his tongue flick my clit. I threw my head back and moaned as my body tensed up. He became more urgent as he licked my clit repeatedly. Tension was rising in my body the more his mouth played with me. As much as I was enjoying it, this was not how I wanted to climax.

I pushed his face away from me. He looked puzzled. I pulled Blake up to me and kissed him. Our mouths melded together. He moaned against me, forcing his tongue into my mouth. He expertly maneuvered his tongue around mine. I groaned against his lips. My hands moved down his perfect body to his hips. I could feel his cock straining against his gym shorts. I pulled them abruptly, just enough to free him. I took hold of his dick and guided it to the entrance of my vagina.

Blake broke our kiss.

"Wait, Kaitlin. As much as I want to, I don't want to hurt you."