Blindside

Alex jerked his head backwards, but unlike before he wouldn't reciprocate the kiss. "Lilly, the fuck!"

"Lilly, you're like my little sister. What was that?" he asked as he pulled from her embrace, his chest constricting as full realization slowly came to his tortured mind.

"Alex, I'm sorry. I've felt this way for a long time. Your first words weren't 'that whore.' You've always been so great to me. I love being with you. I can't help it." she said through tears.

"You're my cousin. We're blood! If this conversation is going where I think, we can't have it!" he yelled as more tears fell from her face. "I'm sorry for yelling, but Lilly, what were you thinking?"

"I'm in love with you." she said sobbing. "That's what I was thinking."

"Look, I think you're just a bit confused... Wait." he said his mind began to work. "You're LF?"... "I'm so stupid!" he yelled, his head banging in post drinking pain.

Lilly turned around and began to walk out. "I should go."

"No," Alex said, putting a hand on her shoulder.

"I should go."

"We need to figure this out. We will figure this out."

"There's nothing to figure out, you know how I feel and you clearly don't feel the same. It's time for me to go."

"Close the door, Lilly," he said firmly.

They walked over to the couch in the large room, both sitting at opposite ends. "I'm sorry if I ever did anything..."

"I'm not going to sit here and listen to you apologize and make this seem like it's something wrong to blame yourself for.... I should go this was stupid," she said, tears returning in double stream.

She began to stand, but Alex stopped her. "Stay, please just stay." He stood up and got her a cloth for her tears and returned to his seat.

"Lilly, it's not your fault."

"Don't try to blame yourself for last night again, Alex. I wasn't that drunk," Lilly confessed.

He took in a deep breath. "You don't think there've been times when I've thought of you ...sexually?"

"Really, no, you're lying to make me feel better."

"When have I ever lied to you? When?" he asked, sitting down beside her.

"After I started porn?"

"I've never watched one...with you in it. You know that. It hurts me to my core that you do that."

"I'll quit if that's what you want."

"You can't put that on me, Lilly. I've always tried to be balanced with you, to not push you away. When we were teenagers, even long before the modeling, there would be times we would just be hanging out and I would look at you and think, 'what if.' I love you. I love spending time with you. I'm happiest when we're together."

Lilly's face began to brighten with this confession.

"But, I'm not in love with you, Lilly. Us together is just not right. It can't happen."

"No, you can't tell me this and then say, can't. You know how much I was hoping you would feel the same way. I've never met a guy like you, Alex. You don't judge me and you love me for who I am, not what I do."

"Lilly, it's just not right!"

"We don't have to tell anyone."

"You think I'm embarrassed about you. When guys bring up your name at work I tell them you're my cousin and to be respectful. Embarrassed? I'm proud of you."

Lilly looked at Alex longingly. "Who does it hurt Alex? I've wanted you for most of my life. Just tell me if you don't like me or if you're not attracted ..."

"God, Lilly. It's not that and you know it. Don't play this game. If you weren't my cousin I would have made the move myself," Alex said, his head pounding unmercifully. He already regretted his confession. Subdued, he melted onto the couch.

"Then pretend I'm not," Lilly said, closing the miniscule gap between them, her face coming closer and closer her lips meeting his. After thirty seconds he pulled his body back and pushed hers away. In that delay Lilly was given more than hope. Her hand had brushed over his crotch and it was not indicating any protest. Just the opposite!

"Lilly, Jesus Christ, we can't. It's just wrong!" Alex protested again.

"Did kissing me feel wrong?" Lilly asked while trying to inch closer to him once more.

"Well that's the problem..." he said, staring into her eyes before he paused.

"What were you about to say?"

Leaping into the air, away from Lilly, Alex finished his thought. "The problem is it's supposed to feel wrong, but...."

Lilly took to her feet with the intent and knowledge of the fact that it was now or never. If there was going to be a future of any kind with Alex, she needed to find out now.

"It feels right, doesn't it?" she asked Alex knowingly as he moved to sit at the corner of the bed.

He sighed deeply, before saying, "Yes."..."Crap," he said in a final outward thought.

Relief and a smile filled Lilly's face as she sat next to her cousin while he stared endlessly into nowhere.

After five elapsed minutes of just sitting, Alex turned his face towards Lilly and moved his head towards her, his lips dominantly covering hers, his fingers grasping her waist with care.

Lilly's moist lips and wet tongue sucked on his, her lips wrapping around his tongue as if it were fucking her mouth. She first sucked at his bottom lip then moved to the top lip. Her head and mouth shifted, tilting and turning to meet his eager tongue.

His hands freely traveled to her chest, roaming along her breasts through the material of her black mini, continuing to explore Lilly's body, entwining with her light brown waves from time to time.

His eagerly curious fingers caused hers to move in tandem with his search. Alex finally pulled his head back. A smile of fulfillment danced along Lilly's pink lips, but still she felt his hesitation. She used her hands to drop her dress and began working on her bra.

Alex began to move away, "Look Lilly, stop," he said, rubbing his hand through his hair.

"What?" she asked after just unlocking the clasps of her bra.

"I just ended a relationship, and then this. We know what our feelings are, but we need time. I need time."

"It's not like you're going back to Amy, right?" she asked with her firm full breasts now exposed once again.

"Of course not, but I need time! You have to understand how this is just a little bit of a shock to my system," he said looking at her breasts, both his mind and his cock regretting his words.

Lilly sighed. "Yeah," she said, nodding as she redressed.

"I'll find a new place by the end of the week and then we start this slowly."

"Why don't you just move in with me?" she asked.

"We take it slowly," Alex said again, dismissing her eagerness to start a relationship when he had just ended one.

"Uh, you're right, you need to stop that," she said as they stared at each other.

Lilly, fully dressed once more, stood near the door. "I love you!" she said with its new heavy meaning.

"I love you too," he said with little hesitation before giving her a quick kiss goodbye. She opened the door and slowly walked out.

Alex fell to the floor as the door closed, his mind wrapping around the sudden turn of events that had led to this.

That day, the Sunday after Valentine's Day, he went about trying not to think about everything that he had been hit with. He put his phone that he had smashed to pieces back together. There was a massive buildup of calls and messages from Amy He spent the rest of the day pacing around the hotel room and halls in an aimless daze. With the phone fixed, every minute a call and text now came in from Amy. Alex kept ignoring the calls. Their couple's cell phone plan that had once seemed practical and affordable now seemed like a moronic idea.

With the sun having set, Alex was in bed when he got a call he actually did decide to answer.

"Hey?" he said, answering the call.

"Hey to you too. I'm sorry that I sprung this right after the Amy thing. I know how you felt about her."

"No, Lilly, I should thank you."

"Really?"

"Of course."

"Why?"

"After this morning I sure as fuck am not thinking about her. What I felt for her no longer seems to matter much."

Lilly began to laugh, melting away the awkwardness of the situation.

"Good, but I'm sorry I forced all that on you. You shouldn't have to deal with all this at once."

Alex paused. "It's never going to be the same, but we need to discuss our relationship in person, Lilly. We can't hide behind the phone."

"What are you saying?"

Alex paused again. "All I know is what I said, and I love being with you too. The more I think about it, the more I want to be with you... and the more I love you. Let's take it from there, okay? Slowly."

"Yes you're right. Well, I'll speak to you sometime... this week?"

"Probably. Most likely, yes."

"Just tell me when you're ready, Alex."

"I will, Lilly."

"Bye, Alex. Love you."

"Love you too, Lilly Flower," Alex said, leaving Lilly with a stupidly wide grin for the rest of the night.

Alex went to bed soothed by the sound of his Lilly Flower. He woke up early with a new resolve and focus, his passion and desire for his flower overwhelming. He got dressed and headed to the hotel's front desk, where he then checked out. Deciding to take Lilly up on her offer of staying with her, he sent her a text to meet up later.

He was now happily steadfast and decided not to second guess his thoughts. "God, am I crazy for wanting to do this?" Alex asked himself.

Next he went to the bank to remove his name from some key things like the house and credit cards that he shared with Amy.

Arriving at work half an hour late, Alex was walking from his Volvo, when an Acura pulled up behind his parked Volvo. Amy looked like she hadn't slept in days, her hair looking like it had been in a tornado.

"Amy, you need to go. I don't want to talk to you!"

"Please, just listen."

"If you stay I can't promise you that I can control what I might say," Alex said, his previously subdued anger boiling."

"I'm sorry, Alex. I really am, baby. You need to listen to me for a second."

"So, was it what it looked like, your boss fucking you up the ass? My view was clouded and he was in your pussy." Alex said as a few coworkers arrived, walking slower than usual to enter the building. "What the fuck are you all gawking at?" Alex yelled at what could have been one of his bosses. Nonetheless, they began to walk faster.

"Alex, please, I'll do anything. We belong together."

"I'm done. Are you serious?" Alex asked, walking away laughing, as he neared the building entrance.

"We need to be together for our kids," Amy said, pulling out a paper from her pocket.

Alex stopped in his tracks. "What?"

"I'm pregnant."

"Well, your boss has plenty of money. You and your bastards will be happy," he said, moving to step inside the building. Chuck, inside at the security desk, was looking through the glass with concern.

"Alex, stop," Amy yelled with nerve. "I quit my job with an email that night. The next day, that Saturday, I went to the doctor's appointment I'd been putting off. I was exactly two months pregnant. Two months, Alex."

"Two months, two months!"... "Two months ago?" Alex said, now reaching out for what was a sonogram. He saw an image with two circles, penned in red."

"Twins?" Alex asked, his eyes beginning to fill with water because he knew that two months ago Amy and he had been stuck for two weeks in a cottage with her parents.

Other than ice fishing, singing and watching the stars, all they could do was fuck. Forgetting the birth control had hindered things for the first few hours until Amy decided he could just pull out.

With full certainty derived from the sonogram, his anger dissipated and was replaced with full unbridled elation. He startled Amy, picking her up and hugging her tightly. "Are you okay? Am I crushing you?"

"I love you," Amy declared.

Alex put her down. Her words had reminded him about what had happened and now he was remembering Lilly. His head began to throb painfully.

"Go to work, okay? Then just come home and we'll talk. I don't expect you to forgive me, Alex, but we can work this out. Right?"

Alex nodded and walked off in a daze. "I love you," Amy called out. Alex didn't reply as he walked in and passed Chuck without a word.

"Hey, Alex. Is everything good on the home front?" Chuck asked, without receiving a reply. The same happened on Alex's way out. It was not a very productive day.

Arriving home, Alex pulled the Volvo up to the house, deciding to park on the corner, avoiding the garage completely, not even taking a chance on the driveway.

Alex knocked at the door and rang the door bell. Amy answered the door saying, "What happened to your key?"

"I don't have it any more," Alex replied, walking into the house. His eyes right away noticed all the boxes, most of the furniture appearing to be either packed up or moved.

"Amy, you're moving?" Alex asked in surprise. He had believed that Amy intended for them to get back together. He was torn between his driven obligations and what his body growingly hungered for: Lilly.

"We're moving," Amy said, killing Alex's hopes.

"What do you mean, we?" Alex asked.

She began pulling his hand toward the unmoved kitchen chairs. He slowly pulled his hand back, following her independent of her guidance. Alex was constantly torn between the anger he felt towards her and the unconditional love he felt for the lives growing within her.

"Your job in Palo Alto. I got it back!"

"Well who'd you fuck now?" Alex asked, regretting it as soon as he said it. The fact that she was now carrying his children changed everything.

Amy swallowed saliva, clearing her passage before she spoke. "I deserved that. I'm sorry. I really am."

Alex brushed his hand through his hair. "No, look, I've just been through a lot here."

"I know. I really mean it. It will never happen again, Alex."

"Look, this is not going to work, Amy. You hurt me. A lot. You lied to me. You screwed around on me with your boss. You betrayed me in the worst way a woman can betray the man who loves her. And, you did all of this after I gave up so much for you to move here to be with you. A better paying job. My friends. My hometown. What the fuck were you thinking? You think all you have to do is say you're sorry, you'll never do it again, and, oh, by the way, I'm pregnant, with twins? And, Alex, I love you so much I got your old job back for you? Right. You shit on me once. It won't happen again. It's going to be hard, if not impossible, for me to forget what happened, Amy, much less forgive you."

"All I need is for you to forgive me. We can go to counseling. Charles never meant anything to me, Alex. It's always been you. You know how much I love you. But I got scared. The wedding date drew closer and Charles became my sounding board."

"Amy, don't try to justify the crap you pulled. "

"I'm not passing blame. I did it. But it was a stupid two-time mistake."

"Two times? That's your justification, that you only screwed around on me twice?"..."I loved you, Amy. I would have done anything for you. I've proved that over and over. And what did you do to prove your love? You screwed around on me when you got scared about getting married. There's a big difference in how we both show our love, Amy. Guess what? Your way fucking sucks."

"Are you saying you don't love me anymore?" she asked, teary eyed.

"I'm saying I don't know."

Amy had meant what she had said. But most of all she was shocked. "I sold the house, Alex. We can start over again in Palo Alto. We'll raise our kids there. We can make this work, together! We'll push back the wedding and we'll work this out." Amy said, laying it on thick. She knew full well the way Alex was wired and she would do whatever she could to keep him. She knew it was impossible for him to abandon his own blood.

Alex didn't reply. If Amy had started off with plans for the wedding, she knew he would have rejected her fully. "I need to go somewhere," Alex declared. Getting up, he walked out of the kitchen and out of the house and got into the Volvo.

He arrived at the house that took the place of a second home sometimes and walked to the front door. He didn't even need to ring the doorbell. Lilly was waiting. She greeted him with her familiar warm smile. "Hey, you're late!"

"I'm so glad you made this decision, Alex." Lilly said, moving to hug him and feeling the distress in his grip.

They were now inside the house. "Alex, what is it?"

"We should sit."

"No... Where is your bag? What's going on?"

"Amy's pregnant with twins and they're mine." Lilly wanted to scream. She was sure she knew where this was going.

"You don't know that."

"I saw irrefutable proof."

"What kind of proof?"

"She showed me a sonogram of the twins and said she was two months along. She got me my old job in Palo Alto, which I haven't quite figured out what to do about yet."

"You're moving?"

"Look, Lilly I'll get a DNA test after but I'm sure their mine."

"I was so excited about this, Alex."

"Lilly, what am I supposed to do?"

"You do what's best for you, what makes you happy, that's what you do."

"It's not that simple. I need to be there for my kids."

"You can still be there for them."

"Yeah, I leave her and marry you. A judge is going to look fondly at that when it comes time to fight for custody..."

"Wait! You were thinking of marrying me?"

"I was just saying, Lilly."

Lilly moved her soft fingers under his chin, pulling his face to hers, kissing his lips and then finally pulling her lips away. "The kind of person you are is why I love you."

"I'm so sorry, Lilly."

"Don't be," Lilly said. "So you're going back to her?"

"Yes," Alex said with a long weighted sigh. "But I no longer love her."

Lilly was going to respond but then Alex kissed her forcefully pressing his tongue into her hot willing mouth. With his nose rubbing against her, he mouthed, "I love you."

Minutes later they were in her bedroom. He lifted her up her legs wrapping around his waist as he carried her to the bed. Then they both stripped like there was no tomorrow. Once more, he picked her up, lowering her to the bed.

Starting at her legs, Alex's lips kissed their way up past her knees, then up her thighs. His tongue glided to her vagina. Kissing her lips, his tongue licked away at the Lilly's citrusy pussy juices. "Oh yes," she mouthed as her hands grasped his head and pulled him even closer.

He removed his head from her entranceway, replacing it with a single finger and then a second. He pulled up his body as he drove his fingers deeper and faster eliciting encouraging moans from her depths, "Oghhoddd, Alex."

Alex left her gasping as he pulled his fingers away from her entrance. Kneeling on the bed, he replaced his fingers with his anxious cock, driving in with a full thrust. Lilly repositioned her legs up into the air near her chest, pushing his cock into her tight slippery hot pussy. "God, I love you" Alex said, staring into Lilly's blue gray eyes. He drove his cock going deeper and deeper with each thrust, her pussy flexing and gripping in response to each motion.

His hips charged forward as his cock rammed into her tight beautiful pussy. He lowered his head and lips to kiss her, his tongue rubbing against hers as his cock propelled into her. The kiss intensified as both neared the end. "Yes!" Lilli yelled. "Yes, right there! Yes, yes, yes!" she gasped as she climaxed.

Alex drove in with his last few fierce thrusts. Soon he was falling next to her, sucking on her beautiful engorged breasts. His tongue went wild over her big hardened nipples causing her pussy to drip once more. "I love you," Lilly said to Alex.

"I'm in love with you, Alex replied." Lilly smiled, understanding fully.

They cuddled next to each other, her head on his chest. "I'm sorry that we're going to have to sneak around. Are you okay with it? Do you understand?" Alex asked.