Breaking Barriers Ch. 07

7://Audio

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Kip shielded his eyes with his cupped hand as he peered through the twirling strobe lights. Hues of magenta and cyan flashed across his face, mirroring that on Vale's face beside him. He couldn't hear the words of the music enough to understand them, but the music pulsing through the room vibrated him to his core. He couldn't hide the smile on his face as he gazed into the sea of writhing, dancing men. He gripped the railing that perched above the dance floor and Vale's hand found its way to his back.

"Pretty cool, huh?" Vale said as a mix of shirtless and costumed men passed by.

"What?" Kip asked, tearing his gaze away from the enticing scene just slightly below them to look at Vale. Kip suddenly found his lips overtaken by Vale's passionate kiss and embrace as Vale's words vibrated very near his ear. The static of the hearing aid's microphone crackled at the physical proximity, but not as badly as it could have. He shivered with a mixture of Vale's embrace and the fond memory of Vale accompanying him to the audiologist appointment. Something he considered boring must have brought new understanding to Vale, at least as animated and as engaged as he had seemed in the doctor's office, Kip figured.

"I'm sorry, I forgot that hearing aids aren't a cure-all technology, especially in a place like this," Vale said, hugging him closer. Something clicked in Kip's mind. Oh yeah. He reached up and pressed a button along the sleek top of each hearing aid and the background noise seemed to dim and Vale's voice came through clearer. Right, environmental settings sure help. Vale pulled away but kept his grip on the smaller boy's shoulders. "I'll make sure to look at you for now on, make sure you can lip read and that I enunciate. Alright?"

"Then you're already doing better than ninety percent of the population." Kip smiled, and then directed them towards the bar. "Let's get started." Vale winked, and they both trailed their way down the platform and towards the bar. They took the chance to look at the menu while the bartender was busy finishing up another order to an entangled couple at the end of the bar.

"What do you usually drink?" Vale asked, and then caught himself, looking guilty and sheepish. "If you even do drink. If not, I can get you a soda."

"No worries." Kip smiled broadly and chuckled at his boyfriend's flustered appearance. "I usually mix about anything with vodka, but I only drink a handful of times a year. Not a big thing for me, but I'm not opposed to it either."

"Right," Vale said, perusing the menu before he looked back to him. "I'm rather similar, not a big drinker. But when I do, I like something spicy, like cinnamon with whiskey." Kip made a face, and Vale shrugged. "What?"

"Everyone is allowed their tastes, I guess," Kip said, his face still clinging to the remnants of disgust. "I guess I just prefer mine sweeter."

Vale leaned against him and tousled his dirty-blond waves. "It's meant to put hair on your chest." He trailed a subtle lick across the nape of the shorter boy's neck. "Not that you have any problems with that, as I recall."

Kip shivered, but Vale pulled away just in time to address the bartender as he ordered their drinks. Since Vale was the designated driver for the night, he opted for a soda blend. Kip stood there trying to get back into the moment and seem like a functional adult, not a crushing schoolboy twisting his hands in the front pocket of his thin sleeveless hoodie.

The heat of the throbbing mass of dancing male bodies emanating from the dance floor did nothing compared to the warmth slowly creeping up his torso from the relentless memory of Vale's touch. It quickly contrasted with the cool, moist glass thrust in his hands as they made their way down the bar towards a row of tables set up on the bar's perimeter.

Vale chuckled, and Kip caught movement out of the corner of his eye. He turned and gave him a questioning look as they took their seats. "Sorry, but you just look so wide-eyed about everything. It's amusing to watch. In a good way."

"Well, I never really had a chance to be in places like this," Kip said, looking around the room again. "It's so freeing, and exciting, and terrifying."

"Yeah, I guess it is at first." Vale got a wistful look in his eyes as he wove his finger along the edge of his glass before taking a small sip. Kip mirrored his movement, reveling in the sweet bite of the vodka.

"So, I take it you're quite comfortable in these sorts of places?" Kip asked. Does Vale go clubbing a lot? He looked around again at the hot bodies writhing against each other to the tune of the pounding music. Some guys were more discreet, making out up against the walls, vague gropes punctuating low moans. Does Vale do that a lot? Surely, not anymore, but he had a sudden, burning curiosity to find out.

"I've had my share of time in clubs like these. It gets boring, honestly." Vale looked away into the crowd, but Kip studied his features. Was he just being polite, or was it how he really felt? His thoughts were interrupted by a wave of Vale's hand and the rush of air as someone came bounding up behind him.

The remaining open chair clattered as it was spun around, and a tall, gangly man draped himself over the back of it, setting down a blue-hued drink on the table. Kip could smell it was something tropical and strongly alcoholic. Some drops splashed across the table as he righted himself and donned a sheepish grin. Even with the streaking colored lights obscuring his ginger locks, Kip recognized him as Vale's friend from before.

"Kent, so glad you could join us. I figured you'd be here tonight," Vale said, clapping his grinning, flushed friend on the shoulder. "Long night?"

"And an even longer morning, I hope," Kent said. He glanced over at Kip and smiled with a hint of hesitation. "And who's this?"

"You remember him, right?" Vale asked. "The guy I so rudely knocked into the fountain?" Kent's eyes lit up with recognition.

"Ah, right." He turned back to Kip and flashed him a devious grin. "So, you're the one who's been hogging my best friend."

"Wish I could say I'm sorry," Kip said, turning to Vale and smiling, "but I'm not."

"Hey, I get it," Kent said. "If we both weren't such dedicated tops, I would have been all over that handsome devil myself." The ginger-haired twink laughed to himself, not noticing that his two companions had stiffened in their seats. Vale watched Kip's features carefully for the revelation that they hadn't talked about yet, but the younger boy's eyes were darting all over the room, purposely avoiding Vale's. His breath seemed to be coming quicker and Vale started to reach across the table for him, but Kent continued, oblivious to any strife. "Not that I wouldn't occasionally bottom for the right guy, of course." He took a drink, but his eyes coasted over the lip of the glass, tracking something in the room. "Speaking of which, I'll be right back."

In a flash, the social whirlwind that was Kent was up and gone, and Kip vaguely saw that he ended up in another guy's arms across the dance floor. His thoughts were scattered, but the feel of Vale's hand closing over his gathered him back into the moment.

"Don't take anything Kent says or does too seriously," Vale said, looking deeply into Kip's eyes, searching for any signs of distress. "His mouth is always two steps ahead of him." A trail of drunken laughter broke through the crowd and Kip followed Vale's gaze as they looked at a well-built guy trying to hold a hysterical Kent. They righted themselves and eased back into dancing, and Vale shook his head before training his gaze back on Kip. "In many ways."

"It's okay," Kip said. "I was just startled, was all. I mean, I thought about it, you know, but I wasn't sure." His gaze wandered, tracking the pattern of the wooden table, the design on the club's napkins, and Vale squeezed his hand at the same time he squeezed his eyes shut. Vale ran his thumb across the back of the smaller boy's hand, and Kip looked at him. "So, you only top, huh?"

"Usually, so far. I've bottomed before, but it wasn't that great. I've been doing some research," Vale admitted sheepishly, and Kip leaned in. Research? "When you told me about being trans, I wanted to make sure I didn't do or say anything stupid. Not that it still won't happen, but I think I lessened the chances."

Kip smiled. "I'm sure you'll do fine. I know you mean well, and that's a hell of a lot better than most guys."

"Thanks," Vale said, giving his hand another squeeze. "Anyways, I read that topping or bottoming can be a hot button among many transguys. I didn't want to upset you by pressuring or placing any expectations on you. I was going to let you lead the way on this."

"But you have to be happy too," Kip said, his brow furrowed as he chewed on his bottom lip. "I know for many transmen, it can be a problem, but with me, I think you might have lucked out." His bright eyes met Vale's for a second. "I consider myself versatile. I've loved topping the very few times I've done it, but I think you can convince me to bottom, in whatever form that takes for us."

"What a coincidence, since I'm quickly coming around to that way of thinking." Vale met his sheepish smile, and then stood to walk around the table and gather him up into a hug. He was careful not to rub his cheek against the microphone of the hearing aid - they've both already suffered the feedback it caused.

"I'm sure we'll both be more than pleased," Vale whispered, and Kip clung to him tighter. They only released at an insistent tapping on Vale's shoulder, and they both turned to see Kent standing with a hand on his hip, and his other poised with his drink.

"Am I supposed to do enough partying for all of us?" Kent said before taking another sip. Vale looked at Kip and shrugged, but the smaller boy nodded back and smiled broadly. He had a feeling they were in for a fun night.

* * *

As Kip danced in Vale's arms, all his insecurities slowly melted away. He lost himself in the thump of the music and chastised his earlier panic. He remembered that Vale had told him before that he considered himself vers, and Kent's comment tonight had just caught him off guard. At first, he had been worried that he'd forgotten, or that Vale had misconstrued his preferences so as not to scare him off.

If Vale had historically been a strict top, could Kip have truly kept him satisfied? Would he have been satisfied himself?

Sure, he liked topping as well, and bottoming was complicated for him, which he and Vale still needed to discuss, but at least the pressure was taken off by his reassurance. In the bliss of their blossoming relationship, those nitpicking details had fallen to the wayside, along with certain insecurities. But that wasn't for tonight. Tonight was about fun.

Throughout the evening, some of Kent's, and by a distant extension, Vale's friends showed up and they formed a loose circle of dancing bodies in the center of the dance floor. Kip noticed that it seemed to be orbiting around Kent, who divided his time between his own guy and some of his friends. Kip was more than content to stay close to Vale's side on the periphery of the circle.

He'd had a few more drinks as the hours wore on, and he tried less and less to interact with others, even though Kent and some of his friends tried to engage him. His vision started to blur a bit, and it was harder to lip read. Also, after a few drinks, he didn't care to try. He briefly ruminated on how much easier signing would be in this environment, and that maybe Vale should learn it after all.

Finally, he declined the offer of a final drink from Vale when last call was announced, knowing that his limit was getting close. As it was, he just felt happy and floaty and was enjoying swaying with his boyfriend in the myriad waves of light. From how Vale doted on him and paid attention to him as they moved, sometimes with Vale behind him, clutching at him, and sometimes in front with his face buried against his clubbing jacket, Kip felt like the only guy in the room to him.

As the song shifted, Kip twirled himself off the dance floor, and Vale followed closely behind as they made their way to the tables, catching him and laughing.

"Easy there," Vale said, holding onto the smaller boy as he wobbled. "Perhaps you've had too much."

Kip guffawed loudly, drawing the stares of some of the nearby patrons. "It's just been a while, but I'm fine. I do have to use the bathroom though."

Vale nodded and looked around the room. "The restrooms are on the other side of the bar, near the entrance. It might be a good idea, because I think the night is wrapping up." Kip nodded and smiled, his eyes glazed with moderate understanding. Vale tousled his hair and pointed him towards the bathrooms. "It's a good thing I'll be driving you home," he added, mostly to himself.

Kip made his way to the bathroom, notably one of the less weaving bodies in the room. He steadied himself with the railing up a few stairs to go around the corner where the restrooms were tucked away. Maybe he did drink just a tad much, he thought, but it had been a while and he thought he remembered having a higher tolerance before. He had lost some weight since his transition, so he thought that might be it.

The bathrooms were rather clean for a club, Kip thought as he entered. It was a small space, but empty. Just how he liked it. He headed for the stall upon habit but glanced at the urinal as he passed it. He stopped, one hand poised on the stall door as he turned to look. His mind drifted to his crotch, where the STP packer he had opted for today rested against his flesh. He had bought the Stand-to-Pee device forever ago and had practiced with it at home. It had started disastrously, but lately he felt he had a handle on it.

He thought about Vale, and Kent, and all the other guys he had seen all night. He had felt a surge of manliness and confidence, so why shouldn't he pee standing up just like any other guy? It felt like a good night for a test drive, so to speak. He let the stall door close and then tucked himself against the urinal. He undid his pants and pulled down his underwear just enough to let the head of the packer out and pressed the funnel part against himself. He tried to relax, although he did want to hurry in case someone came in.

But it shouldn't be a big deal, right? There were three urinals, and he had picked the one farthest away. The packer looked realistic enough from a distance, and as long as no one got too close, he should be good. He tilted his hips and applied some bladder pressure, being careful not to overwhelm the funnel. He was elated that it was working so well, and he was reveling in the experience that eluded many of his kind. His happiness was cut short with the clatter of the bathroom door banging open.

"Yeah, I'll be right back," the guy who had entered called back out through the door before it swung closed on the chatter of his group of friends. Kip tried to steady his breathing as the much larger man moseyed over to the urinal right next to him. It took all his concentration as he told himself to just look forward and ignore the other guy. He was almost done, and then he could tuck himself away, wash his hands, and make a quick escape.

He felt the heat of someone watching him, and he turned just enough to catch the guy looking him up and down in the periphery of his vision, which was exceedingly well. The other guy leaned more into his space. Was he leering? Would he try coming on to him? It was a mostly gay club, but even Kip thought that would be too cheesy, like the start of a bad porno.

But, from the brief stories he heard from Kent, it did happen.

The guy pressed more, and Kip tried to turn himself away as a reflex but ended up displacing the packer against himself in the subtle movement. He cursed to himself but realized he hadn't made that big of a mess as he was mostly done and started tucking himself away and doing up his pants to make his escape, when he felt the tight grip on his arm.

His movement and cursing had brought the guy's attention right to his crotch, and Kip saw the confusion flash over his face even as he zipped up. The guy's wild eyes caught him off guard as he looked him up and down again, this time with suspicion. He tried to edge his way around to make it to the door, but the guy's imposing figure cut him off and the grip on his arm yanked him back. His angry tone sent a chill through him, and all of Kip's worst fears were realized with a simple sentence.

"What the fuck are you?"